The INTPf High Court of Justice

[TheScornedReflex]

Why is it I get the feeling of not being wished well. Just for that I may have to skip wishing you a happy birthday.

I am only following the course of justice. And my birthday has been and past.

 

[BigApplePi]

I am only following the course of justice. And my birthday has been and past.

It is not your fault you fell into that trap. I knew your birthday wasn't now as 364 times out of 365 1/4 I'm utterly right. You may have to forgo my happy birthday wishes should you survive to the next one. There is no justice.

 

[SpaceYeti]

Just in case I have a case here, I think justice itself should be put on trial. Is there any justice in justice? By that I mean justice could just be a waste of your time meaning injustice could be more just that just mere justice ... if you know what i mean.

If it's true, then it's true regardless what we think about it. However, I don't think it is true.

 

[BigApplePi]

If it's true, then it's true regardless what we think about it. However, I don't think it is true.

I'm thinking if there are cases where injustice is better to just leave alone:

1. Suppose you call me a name in public and I believe I have a slander case. I may not have exactly deserved it, but why bother? ... as long as it doesn't repeat too often.

2. Suppose a poster here posts a silly title thread. It looks frivolous on the surface, yet who knows what good and unusual things our imaginations can bring out later?

3. Suppose a poster here gets too pushy. He is banned for pushiness but we lose a person with many stimulating, if pushy, ideas. Now people are afraid to take chances and we have to face a certain dullness.

4. Any frivolous lawsuit.

 

[walfin]

I'm thinking if there are cases where injustice is better to just leave alone:

1. Suppose you call me a name in public and I believe I have a slander case. I may not have exactly deserved it, but why bother? ... as long as it doesn't repeat too often.

2. Suppose a poster here posts a silly title thread. It looks frivolous on the surface, yet who knows what good and unusual things our imaginations can bring out later?

3. Suppose a poster here gets too pushy. He is banned for pushiness but we lose a person with many stimulating, if pushy, ideas. Now people are afraid to take chances and we have to face a certain dullness.

4. Any frivolous lawsuit.

The court finds you in contempt and sentences you to be whipped with the noodles while you're being strangled so you can ponder the meaning of injustice.

Now, back to business. There are a number of lawsuits against you. The jurors for BigApplePi v INTPf are @MichiganJFrog, @Jennywocky and @joal0503. Congrats!

We'll need to drag some bystanders in for jury duty for SpaceYeti v BigApplePi too.

Get cracking, @TheScornedReflex! I'm supposed to be on a sickie.

 

[BigApplePi]

The court finds you in contempt and sentences you to be whipped with the noodles while you're being strangled so you can ponder the meaning of injustice.

Very well. I accept my sentence with calm grace on one condition. I must be provided with a napkin. How else shall I wipe off the drool? I don't want to be left hanging looking disrespectfully.

As for the other, proceed as planned.

 

[Jennywocky]

Very well. I accept my sentence with calm grace on one condition. I must be provided with a napkin. How else shall I wipe off the drool? I don't want to be left hanging looking disrespectfully.

As for the other, proceed as planned.

*writes in her jurors notebook that the defendant went out of order and seems to be trying to control the situation in ways he does not possess....*

"Megalomania?? Will he try to commandeer the courtroom? Who are the lawyers, who is the judge in this trial?????"

 

[BigApplePi]

... the defendant went out of order ...

Regretfully the defendant admits his guilt and withdraws from this matter as he must attend to some vitally important trivia of no consequence to anyone least of all himself. He turns over any remaining power to Jenny and SpaceYeti under the jurisdiction of walkin walfin knowing it will be in good, if not honest, hands.

 

[SpaceYeti]

Regretfully the defendant admits his guilt and withdraws from this matter as he must attend to some vitally important trivia of no consequence to anyone least of all himself. He turns over any remaining power to Jenny and SpaceYeti under the jurisdiction of walkin walfin knowing it will be in good, if not honest, hands.

Wooo!


What was my job again?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I am way tooo drunk for this. But I still think we need a executioner.. I nominate myself as a reliable killer of killing things. *Grabs a fistful of noodles and forces them down Baps throat until he starts choking* Yeah, justice.

*Takes swig of his Jim Beam Honey to celebrate (has anyone tried it? It is fucking good)*

 

[BigApplePi]

Gulp ... Cough ... Erp

 

[Jennywocky]

Dammit. How are we supposed to try the guy when he was killed for contempt before we rendered a verdict??? I'm tempted just to vote "innocent" so that Judge Wapner, err, Walfin has to talk his way out of how the prisoner is still dead.

...At least gimme some of that JBH.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

The JB is gone. I have consumed it .

 

[Jennywocky]

The JB is gone. I have consumed it .

*sigh*



... picks at a spare noodle.

 

[walfin]

Dammit. How are we supposed to try the guy when he was killed for contempt before we rendered a verdict??? I'm tempted just to vote "innocent" so that Judge Wapner, err, Walfin has to talk his way out of how the prisoner is still dead.

...At least gimme some of that JBH.

I didn't know about this guy until you mentioned him.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Wapner

Well. This didn't happen on my watch, did it?

Wrongful death claim anyone?

 

[BigApplePi]

Guilty or innocent?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...annibal-cop-guilty-plot-kidnap-eat-women.html

 

[joal0503]

JURY DUTY?!!! blech...ummm....I seem to lose my talky ability of the english native language. no speaky engrish good.

 

[MichiganJFrog]

The jurors for BigApplePi v INTPf are @MichiganJFrog, @Jennywocky and @joal0503. Congrats!

Damn, man. I've been in jury pools in D.C., Boston, and Chicago, and every time, the case gets settled out of court, and now I can't even serve on an imaginary trial jury! Well, at least I got caught up on that new John Grisham novel.

 

[BigApplePi]

Damn, man. I've been in jury pools in D.C., Boston, and Chicago, and every time, the case gets settled out of court, and now I can't even serve on an imaginary trial jury! Well, at least I got caught up on that new John Grisham novel.

Somebody quick. Judge or no judge, put MichiganJFrog on a jury even if it is an imaginary one. If the case is settled we can always dissolve the jury but until then he must serve. Do it now before that J. Grisham novel gets to the denouement.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Somebody quick. Judge or no judge, put MichiganJFrog on a jury even if it is an imaginary one. If the case is settled we can always dissolve the jury but until then he must serve. Do it now before that J. Grisham novel gets to the denouement.

@MichiganJFrog you are now serving as juror for a case.. Dont know which one but thats not important.

 

[Jennywocky]

Damn, man. I've been in jury pools in D.C., Boston, and Chicago, and every time, the case gets settled out of court, and now I can't even serve on an imaginary trial jury! Well, at least I got caught up on that new John Grisham novel.

I motion for MFJ to be sodaboarded strapped to a large piece of silly putty, for Quoting Mentions in his post.

This is the secret shame, this is the most heinous sin, this is the blemish upon the soul of humanity, and it must be expunged!

 

[joal0503]

I motion for MFJ to be sodaboarded strapped to a large piece of silly putty, for Quoting Mentions in his post.

This is the secret shame, this is the most heinous sin, this is the blemish upon the soul of humanity, and it must be expunged!

*insufflates large quantity of powdered silly putty

YES, purge the wicked and unpure! for the children!!!

 

[BigApplePi]

Gasp. Is there no order in this heah court? Weah iz da judge? Ah is done fit to be tried. Ah iz tried of this delay. Ah demands dis jury be seated.

Wheah iz da sillyputy? Meow. Who's in charge of court equipment? Who has been mentioning? There are enough guilty parties heah to have a party.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I motion for MFJ to be sodaboarded strapped to a large piece of silly putty, for Quoting Mentions in his post.

This is the secret shame, this is the most heinous sin, this is the blemish upon the soul of humanity, and it must be expunged!

I'll allow it.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Gasp. Is there no order in this heah court? Weah iz da judge? Ah is done fit to be tried. Ah iz tried of this delay. Ah demands dis jury be seated.

Wheah iz da sillyputy? Meow. Who's in charge of court equipment? Who has been mentioning? There are enough guilty parties heah to have a party.

Bap are you hungry?

 

[Jennywocky]

Bap are you hungry?

His blood sugah does seem a little low...

 

[MichiganJFrog]

I motion for MFJ to be sodaboarded strapped to a large piece of silly putty, for Quoting Mentions in his post.

This is the secret shame, this is the most heinous sin, this is the blemish upon the soul of humanity, and it must be expunged!

Wait, so now I'm a defendant AND a juror? Saves time, I guess.

 

[MichiganJFrog]

Weah iz da judge?

Sammy Does Flip Wilson

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Wait, so now I'm a defendant AND a juror? Saves time, I guess.

Oh silly me. I left the impression you were going to be tried. As you are a juror any punishment I dish out to you all is absolute and enacted promptly. Tis the law of the land. Now who wishes to punish Michie?

 

[BigApplePi]

I'm almost certain Michigan is innocent but to make sure I'll have to see what the other jurors have to say. One thing IS for sure: if a crime was committed SOMEONE is guilty.

 

[MichiganJFrog]

As you are a juror any punishment I dish out to you all is absolute and enacted promptly.

Man, I knew that $17.35 check came with some major strings attached!

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Man, I knew that $17.35 check came with some major strings attached!

Oh this is just the start. Do not worry though. It's not like I am making rules up as I think of them or anything .

 

[MichiganJFrog]

It's not like I am making rules up as I think of them or anything .

Phew, that's a relief. I'll take an oppressive system over no system at all any day of the week!

 

[walfin]

In Re BigApplePi



Time for a Chancery matter for a change. Now that BAP is supposed to be dead, we get to distribute his assets! And there'll be lots and lots of court Costs, perhaps enough to absorb the entire Estate. *rubs hands with glee*

Now, did he leave a will?

So, never mind that wills normally don't involve juries. MichiganJFrog gets to be on the jury for this case. Let's have two more.

Unfortunately, we don't get to decide that novel point of law for jurors who claim not to speak English, since the case got withdrawn.

For her righteous endeavour to rid the forum of a pet peeve of mine, Jenny shall get a group hug from all of you .

Damn, it seems I haven't gotten my gavel back. Never mind, a baseball bat will do.

 

[MichiganJFrog]

I haven't gotten my gavel back. Never mind, a baseball bat will do.

Well, that'll get their attention.

Still and all, I get the sinking feeling court proceedings might go something like this:

MPFC

 

[Jennywocky]

Wait, so now I'm a defendant AND a juror? Saves time, I guess.

This court might be full of kangaroos, but we still do try to be efficient.

I mean, uh, "OFF WIT' 'IS 'EAD!"

EDIT: The picture of the last vid clip reminds me of this gem:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-DXFkrPHpY

 

[TheScornedReflex]

In Re BigApplePi



Time for a Chancery matter for a change. Now that BAP is supposed to be dead, we get to distribute his assets! And there'll be lots and lots of court Costs, perhaps enough to absorb the entire Estate. *rubs hands with glee*

Now, did he leave a will?

So, never mind that wills normally don't involve juries. MichiganJFrog gets to be on the jury for this case. Let's have two more.

Unfortunately, we don't get to decide that novel point of law for jurors who claim not to speak English, since the case got withdrawn.

For her righteous endeavour to rid the forum of a pet peeve of mine, Jenny shall get a group hug from all of you .

Damn, it seems I haven't gotten my gavel back. Never mind, a baseball bat will do.

*tosses gavel back to walfin*

Phew. Finally, I think I'll resume my role as official court executioner. (And by resume I mean start.)

 

[MichiganJFrog]

This court might be full of kangaroos

Actually, upon careful examination of each and every post in this thread, to the point where I am now cross-eyed and drooling, I have determined that this court is really more of a star chamber.

Spoiler

wait for it

Okay, okay, I was just trying to impress y'all with the amazing breadth of my legal knowledge!

 

[Montresor]

Actually, upon careful examination of each and every post in this thread, to the point where I am now cross-eyed and drooling, I have determined that this court is really more of a star chamber.

Did you notice the clear distinction between the charming spontaneity and wit ... and how it turned into raw stupidity?

JKs

 

[MichiganJFrog]

Did you notice the clear distinction between the charming spontaneity and wit ... and how it turned into raw stupidity?

Welp, I did another painstaking review of the thread, and yes, I noted a clear change in tone that, ah, coincided roughly with the time that I, heh heh, joined the conversation...

<nervous laughter accompanied by scratching of the back of the head>

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Did you notice the clear distinction between the charming spontaneity and wit ... and how it turned into raw stupidity?

JKs

 

[Montresor]

 

[walfin]

CONTEMPT!!! Order in the court, all of you!

 

[BigApplePi]

CONTEMPT!!! Order in the court, all of you!

Heah come da judge. What makes you think you can order us around like that?

(1)Order in the court
(2)Entropy in the court
(3) Chaos in the court

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I like chaos! Maybe we should have a rave? I'll bring the acid and E. We can theme it around the court.

 

[Montresor]

Theme? THEME?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

... Like.. dress up.. and stuff..

 

[walfin]

In Re BigApplePi

BigApplePi is dead and we need to distribute his assets.

But I got ahead of myself. Darn. We haven't had a coroner's inquiry yet.

No worry. We'll still distribute his property to everyone in due course.

I order an inquiry to be made and Montresor to take charge.

SpaceYeti v Estate of BigApplePi

Is SpaceYeti still filing his claim? Otherwise, in light of BAP's new status, this suit shall be summarily dismissed.

 

[Jennywocky]

he's not dead yet, is he?

I think he's shamming. And then he will flee to Bulgeria, before we know he's gone.
Someone must put a stop to it!

 

[Montresor]

Motion to create a committee to decide if

1. BigApplePi really is dead
2. I really am in charge
3. Walfin is really walfin

I nominate MichiganJFrog to chair this committee.

All in favour?