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Do you think you fully belong here?

Inappropriate Behavior

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Do you get the sense you fully belong here on this forum?

I asked myself that question not too long ago and while my initial answer was "yeah, sure" I started noticing that there are quite a few threads and topics that I feel no conection to at all. I began thinking that my belonging was more tangential. That's not a bad thing necessarily, it could just be that my interests don't match up with others as much as it seems other members experience here.

We all seem to share a lot of similarities in personality quirks (even with our non-INTP members although perhaps less) and we also have our own unique properties which is to be expected. So I guess the some questions are do you feel that the similarities you have with other members makes you feel as if coming here is like coming home where you can be yourself at your freest? Perhaps does it feel as if this is more like meeting friends at the library or clubhouse where you might be more restrained?

Also, do you ever get a feeling of missing out on something (left out?) in some of the serious threads? I'm a philisophical illiterate amongst a group well versed on the subject. I also don't get a connection to any academia related topics (perhaps because I'm so far removed from it). Everything I know about transhumanism for instance is what little I've gleened here so I feel like a little kid listening to adults talking about some serious subject that just doesn't stick in my head.

I'm doing a horrible job of explaining. I'm not going through some kind of crisis or anything I'm just curious to know to what extent you all think you belong here. Maybe use a scale of 1-10 with 1 = "What the hell, who are these alien creatures?" and 10 = "I connect with my very soul to almost everyone here!"

I'm probably a 6.
 

Anthile

Steel marks flesh
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3
 

flow

Audiophile/Insomniac
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Haha, this is interesting... I'm almost sure that INTPs naturally feel like outcasts, so it'd make sense that most of us don't completely feel as if we belong here. That being said, I also rarely connect with the large majority of serious discussions on this site. I've completely written off religion, god, and all that jazz as nonsense and I have nothing to add on any of those topics other than, "I'm not down with organized religions". I pretty much partake in the non-serious threads, any discussion or mention of music, and psychological stuff if I feel like I have anything to contribute (and in retrospect, I usually feel like I was wrong anyways).

Nevertheless! I love this place. I like reading posts from new members and familiar members alike, I enjoy the community of people this forum has created. And regardless of how I feel about my own belongings to the community, I like being here. I can't say that about very many places.

I rate myself as a 5.
 

Dormouse

Mean can be funny
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5? I guess. I'm too damn emotional, it seems, compared to many people here.
 

tashi

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I would say 5 or 6 for myself aswell. It's kind of hard to relate to some of the topics discussed here because it seems to me that the majority of people on this forum are adults. Which is fine, but I can't exactly join in on discussions about career choices and things aloung that line, seeing as I'm 14. Plus I'm already bad enough as it is at communication, so anytime I see a thread which interests me and I might comment on, like 50 other people who are much more mature and intellectually talented then myself have posted some amazing comment which says the exact same thing that I had planned to say, only in a much more elaborative and well thoughtout way.

So I can relate, perhaps for different reasons, but I definatly know what you mean =]
 

beastie

and then what?
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I would say 6. Love the site and the many ideas of members even though I am unable to contribute to a lot of discussions due to lack of knowledge on certain subjects.
Plus... it would have to be the only site where a dummy spit isnt usually responded to with a dumb, flaky "feel-good" response but honest attempts at helping each other (as opposed to members replying just so they can get airtime).
 

Ashenstar

I'm your chauffeur with high
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Oh yes. I feel this way everytime I visit this forum. Funny, I just brought this up briefly to another INTP who is currently spending large quatities of his time trying to convince me I'm wonderful. Sometimes I feel so out of place here that I have considered never logging on again. Along with the feeling of not belonging comes a feeling of terrible uselessness.
It does feel exactly like a little kid in awe of the big discussions and big words the grown ups are using around me.
And just like when I was a little kid, I so long to chime in, but am intelligent enough to know I shouldn't because I should not speak of what I do not know.

I personally was raised in an environment that discouraged intellectualism and higher education and I slept for a whole decade putting me at a great disadvantage to others. This is not meant as a complaint, I see it more as a challenge.

This is the reason I do come back though. I have so much to catch up on!

I hate to peg a number on it but I would say a 4 perhaps.

IB I'm glad you're here and am more than happy to chat about the more simple pleasures in life.
 

Da Blob

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LOL, I would guess that others might rate me 1 out of ten, but I guess I am about a 6. I am really too old for this stuff. Very few threads interest me - not that most are not pertinent to the younger members. I try to be helpful, but often I imagine I just sound like an encyclopedia or some Authoritarian...

Even though I disagree with a lot of the ideas posted I am basically good-humored about the arguments, and I think most others are as well..

Of course I have my bad days, but to get upset about some words that appear on my monitor or take some comment personally(?) That would not be logical
 

Deleted member 1424

Guest
I felt like this a lot in the beginning and I almost left for good because of it. However when registration closed and I got to know members on an individual level it changed. The people here were no longer faceless masses of intellect; they now had a history, a pattern of behavior. They became human in my eyes.

I'd encourage new members (and old) to get to know other posters individually, develop a friendship (or petty rivalry) of some sort. People seem a lot less intimidating that way, and as a bonus you're more likely to understand what exactly it is that they're saying in the serious threads.

We're a mangled assortment of people from all over the world; isn't that just fantastic? We may not always relate, but it's our differences and the fact that we can learn from each other that makes this place worthwhile. I can't say if I fit in or stick out like a sore thumb, but I'm quite fond of this place, so interpret that as you will.
 

Inappropriate Behavior

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IB I'm glad you're here and am more than happy to chat about the more simple pleasures in life.

I'm glad your here too and I'm a big fan of the simple pleasures. When I'm done procrastinating, I am going to cook myself a nice, simple yet in a way elegant dinner. To me, that's the real good life.

@Da Blob, actually I would rate you somewhere in the middle too (to be fair, some of the others who have said 5 or 6 I would think more 8 or 9. Anthile went way too low, the knucklehead, but they are his feelings so I can't really dispute it). You offer a one of a kind perspective and in my book, that's a good thing even if I disagree with 90% of what you say :p

Like flow, I do love this place but sometimes I feel either out of my league or as if I'm a pair of brown shoes at a black tie affair.

Edit: Adaire? To me you seem like a 9.9. like a tree in the forest, as natural a fit as it gets.
 

Toad

True King of Mushroomland!!!
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I come here because I enjoy reading what people think. I guess I'm because I'm still trying to figure life out, I don't really have any real opinions/beliefs yet. So I come here and read what others believe. See what's out there, u know?

This forum can be really preachy and philosophical sometimes. I understand maybe half of what you guys say most of the times. But I like looking up stuff that I don't understand and then try to engage in the conversation. I think that's a good way to learn.

So my number would be 6.5. I feel comfortable here, but I don't understand much :) BUT, I really enjoy the people here...so maybe 7.5..
 

saffyangelis

Bandwidth Angel
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I think I'm about a 5 too.. this place feels more of a fit than anywhere else I think, but I still feel waay out of my depth on lots of the threads - I like reading them, but I never know how to contribute.
... anytime I see a thread which interests me and I might comment on, like 50 other people who are much more mature and intellectually talented then myself have posted some amazing comment which says the exact same thing that I had planned to say, only in a much more elaborative and well thoughtout way...
I'm seconding this bit really =P
Tashi already said it for me.
 

Toad

True King of Mushroomland!!!
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Razare, banana mango, cryptonia, and a few others are the ones I'm always trying to keep up with. They seem really smart and fit well in this forum.
 

echoplex

Happen.
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Well, I've always tended to feel alienated, almost regardless of the company. When I first joined I may have easily registered a 2, as I had yet to realize how much (and yet, at times how little) in common I have with others here. Now, I think a 4.5 or 5 seems accurate. Still a bit low, but that's high for me because I always feel a bit left out in some weird way. While there are many topics I know little about, I'd say it's the tone of the discussions that is refreshing. I'm often around irrational people who seem to be ruled by emotion, so it's nice to see an approach to discussions that rarely if ever involves name-calling and ad hominem attacks. Also, most of you manage to be nice w/o being "too" nice. :cool:
 

ifelloverboard

Social Engineer
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0. I don't really belong anywhere and people here are too lazy to care so it all works out.
 

transformers

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I haven't been here as long as you have Inappropriate Behavior, but I do feel very comfortable here. The sarcastic wit and no-bullshit tolerance of most of the members is very refreshing, and a marked contrast to the ass-kissing you see on other forums. Coming here is akin to meeting a group of trusted friends at a bar, you all know the others won't be afraid to tell you the truth, and can relax around them. That's the vibe I'm getting.
 

ozzieflipflop

flipflop
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I like the "in depth" conversations that, as Auburn says, are sadly missing in everyday life. Having said that, I usually lack the courage to comment for fear of sounding stupid. I'm borderline Fi/Ti, so I'm probably not as analytical as most folks....I don't engage my brain incase the floaty feeling evaporates! 1
 

Cavallier

Oh damn.
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I really enjoy the "deep" threads. I love learning things and the "deep" threads often send me reeling off in new directions shouting "wiki here I come!". Every once in a while I think I might be able to contribute something but often I get so distracted by researching something new that I don't really get around to commenting. That or somebody has already commented with what I would have said.

The "fluff" threads are also enjoyable. They allow me to peer into the psyche of the various forum members. Plus, even the "fluff" threads are enjoyable simply for the reason that they are often witty if not deeply theoretical or philosophical.

However, I don't really think I fit in much. Most members probably roll their eyes at my comments. I always enjoy your contributions IB. I like your perspective. We have a lot of high school and college kids here. Which is fine but it's nice to get the input of a different demographic...somebody with a different background. I enjoy snowqueen and jennywocky for the same reason. I think that yellow and I are perhaps the same person but from alternate dimensions. So I guess there are a few members I identify with.

I guess I'll rate myself a 3. :confused:
 

Tunesimah

Man-Child becoming a Dude.... Man
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I don't know, I never really fit in with any group that well.

Even amongst people similar to me, I feel like I'm on the periphery.

I haven't tapped into my silliness, have a good time mode much here... I don't know if it will ever happen. It rarely does online...

I think my posts here are sort of dry, boring, microblogs to myself.

But it's hard to tell who's reading your posts and gaining something from them...

In terms of number, I give myself a 3~5. I think this place skews a bit younger than myself...
 

cheese

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Can we agree that we all feel like outcasts and therefore fit in perfectly well with everyone else?
 

cheese

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I think we should also draw a distinction between fitting in the intellectual discussions, and fitting in with the cliques, although of course there's some overlap. And then have an overall score (combination of the two + general feel of the place). Blah blah blah were the rest of my thoughts.
 

Claverhouse

Royalist Freicorps Feldgendarme
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When through the frosty air of a dark night one strides past the vast city beyond and for now at least shuns the screaming salesfolk outside the highminded institutes of learning at the feet of huckster professors and gaudy bars where raucus bitter political drunks quarrel biliously whilst attractive women kindly display their glory to paying customers on to the icy fields leading to the edge of the great pine forest where sits snuggled a deceptively small shrouded stone-ashlared building hooded by the firs and knocks and enters to find the soft-lit interior with erudite pleasant chatterers constantly moving and regrouping as they flow to each blazing log-filled fireplace one finds a soothing inertia as the wind gathers pace without.


Obviously I simply was trying for the longest sentence without punctuation. Still, I'll put it at a 5.



Claverhouse :phear:


:raven05:
 

walfin

Democrazy
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cheese said:
I think we should also draw a distinction between fitting in the intellectual discussions, and fitting in with the cliques
Yep. I fit in reasonably with the discussions but I feel I don't really know anyone here.

Probably 1.5.
 

Minuend

pat pat
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For me, it depends on my mood. Sometimes i feel that it's wonderfully odd to know that the person writing "on the other side" is as emotionally confused and awkward as I am. I've been here since January, I never left. I do like it here. Both the humor and the deeper topics. Though I can't tribute to the deeper threads, I enjoy reading them. And they are there so that I can read them whenever I want. I know no matter what topic is being discussed, there will always be a lot of thought behind the posts. I like that.

I do take comfort in being in this place, I've noticed. At the same time, I fear I will be influenced in such a way that I will choose to be more like the INTP stereotype, not developing my inferior functions and such. But it's comforting to know that I'm not alone. I'm certainly feel alone and foolish out in RL.

I must say, I rarely roll my eyes at anyone at this forum. (It happens from time to time that trolls visit). None of the regulars make me do that. This is the only forum where I like all the regulars, even if I don't agree with you all. Many of you say that you have nothing to contribute and such, but I don't see that at all.

Connecting with other members here is as difficult as connecting with people in RL. Maybe even worse here, since I know how intelligent everyone is. And, like most of the people here it would seems, I feel somewhat inferior.

Subjectively, I would say 6: I feel like I belong because of all the odd (which is totally a good thing) people. And I think this is the closest thing I feel to belonging anywhere.

Intellectually, -10. I need some more reading before I can achieve the same level as many people here.

Bottom line is, I like it here and I'm planning on staying for a while. And I hope regulars as well as new members stay as well.

Ops, I'm going to be late for school, I might add more later.
 

Adymus

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So I was going to say 7, but then I noticed nearly everyone else put even less than that. I don't even relate to a lot of the things most of you talk about, like social Anxiety and disliking being complemented, wtf is up with that? So apparently we must be basing our scales off of different things. But regardless, I am still going with 7, I may not be exactly like everyone, but I still relate enough to feel like I have a substantial connection.
 

beastie

and then what?
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@ Tunesimah I think youre cool :)
 

Yellow

for the glory of satan
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I fluctuate a lot. Most of the time I'm at about a 7... Though there are some things I don't connect with. The video games, anime, computer related stuff... I don't understand a single thing Claverhouse says, though he scares me seems like a perfectly nice young man. I love reading the senseless, endless threads like "adopt me". It's just like a breath of fresh air being able to interact with nice, normal people for a change rather than the hicks I have to talk to everyday. I see bits of myself in so many forumites (except for Cavallier, with whom I have nothing in common :phear:) .... and everyone is so welcoming to newcomers. Within 24 hours I was debating Ayn Rand in my intro thread and IB said he was gonna put an axe through John Galt's head...where else can you get that?... makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
 

Aiss

int p;
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I fit here more than anywhere else. It's probably the only forum where I'm posting more often in casual threads than in serious ones (although I'm still reading them). This says something about intellectual level of this place to me. When it comes to getting the jokes and the way of thinking, I feel I'm home. Getting the feeling of knowing people and sharing their values - not so often.

Ah, let's not over think it. Make it a 6.
 

Kuu

>>Loading
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I'd say 8 or 9.

IB, belonging here and participating in conversations is not about information, but about the desire for understanding. It is not possible to be an erudite on all subjects, but it is possible to have an open mind that can attempt to grasp any topic. There is no reason to fear or be left out, or restrain yourself from commenting.
 

bananaphallus

found out
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4 or 5? I feel like I'm more honest here than anywhere else really, which is sad in some ways. Although that may not be saying much, seeing as how I lie a lot.
 

JUN

Watching the Watchers
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I was going to say 5/6, much like everyone else in this thread said... Noticing that I then decided that it's totally a 9/10.
 

jsibley1

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I don't know. I guess? I'm INTP.

I had a look at INTP Central and decided that this place was probably better. From what I gather, they have a whole lot of non-INTP stuff going on. That place didn't jive with me.
 

nickgray

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3 or 4. I guess I'm an outcast inside the outcasts club :)
 

Da Blob

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When through the frosty air of a dark night one strides past the vast city beyond and for now at least shuns the screaming salesfolk outside the highminded institutes of learning at the feet of huckster professors and gaudy bars where raucus bitter political drunks quarrel biliously whilst attractive women kindly display their glory to paying customers on to the icy fields leading to the edge of the great pine forest where sits snuggled a deceptively small shrouded stone-ashlared building hooded by the firs and knocks and enters to find the soft-lit interior with erudite pleasant chatterers constantly moving and regrouping as they flow to each blazing log-filled fireplace one finds a soothing inertia as the wind gathers pace without.


Obviously I simply was trying for the longest sentence without punctuation. Still, I'll put it at a 5.

Claverhouse :phear:

:raven05:
And a good sentence it was...
 

Toad

True King of Mushroomland!!!
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I don't know. I guess? I'm INTP.

I had a look at INTP Central and decided that this place was probably better. From what I gather, they have a whole lot of non-INTP stuff going on. That place didn't jive with me.

Yea, I wonder why INTPcentral is so much different then this place. Is it because they have a bright background?
 

Ashenstar

I'm your chauffeur with high
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Yea, I wonder why INTPcentral is so much different then this place. Is it because they have a bright background?


I have heard it suggested that it's different here because there are more girls here?

However, I am speaking on what I do not know.
 

Toad

True King of Mushroomland!!!
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I wonder what they think of us over there...
 

Kuu

>>Loading
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I wonder what they think of us over there...

the first (?) rule of intpforum is... you do not talk about intpforum :phear:
 

Ashenstar

I'm your chauffeur with high
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Agent Intellect

Absurd Anti-hero.
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I'd put myself at probably around 2 or 3. Probably about 90% of the posts I read I either never post any replies or I delete what I was going to say before posting it because I don't think anyone would really give two shits what I have to say. I'll stick with what I do best - debating with people...

...Which is why Blob does belong here - he is my arch nemesis, and without him I would probably make half the posts I do now :borg:

EDIT: it all depends, too, I suppose. A year ago I would have probably ranked myself higher, but that's perhaps more of a change in my own mindset then in the forum atmosphere (although I do miss EB, FusionKnight, et al. And derailing threads with NoID10t's).
 

Tempestas

who purgatoried their torsos night after night wi
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I's say a 6/7. I agree with Tashi; when you're only 13, most of these topics do not apply to you. I don't understand half of the 'deep' conversations going on here.

I'd like to point out that I try, however.

And, amazingly, I understood what Claverhouse said... I think. :confused:

I really do enjoy the intelligent conversation, though. I'm getting sick of all of the 'OMG, u sad wat?!!11!!1!' trash all over the rest of the web. It burns my eyes. And, not to be rude to my friends, I don't feel like I know very many smart people. For example, one friend I have is always like this: someone will say a joke -que laughter- while she stops and looks confused. We stop, expecting this, and turn to her. A few moments later, we get the 'oooohhh' and continue our conversation.

If they show even an ounce of intelligent thought, they destroy my image of them with 8th grade humor. *sigh*

~Tempestas
 

Ombat

but for all I aspire I am really a liar
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I don't belong where other people can be found... so not really.

I don't post often, so it's difficult to say. I wish I could relate to more of you than I do, but sadly...

I do really enjoy reading all of the topics though, but don't have a thing to say in them. Or, like AI said, type a response and then delete it.
 

didyouknow

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Well I've been here for almost a year now... not that's you'd know it though.
I guess I don't feel like I fit here at all... don't really know anyone... not intelligent enough for the more deep conversations, nor funny enough for the fluffy threads... but I do enjoy this forum quite a lot...

0.5
 

nemo

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I'm a bit like Ombat and didyouknow. I like being on this forum - the threads and people, unlike on some other forums, are quite interesting. But the fact is, I don't come on here and post regularly enough to feel like a proper member of the community; I'm more like an person looking in from the outside. Also, I do get a little intimidated out of posting by the previous witty replies I see. Sometimes I feel like I would be interrupting something. >____>

4
 

kantor1003

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too many posters here. I think it will take a while to get some sense of belonging...if that ever will happen here...if not, it's not a biggie. I'd say 1-2, but too early to say anything really.
 

nemo

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Yeah, the size is a bit of a problem. It's a lot easier to ease into a community when there's only a small number of people. Now is that because of our introversion...
 

kantor1003

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Yeah, the size is a bit of a problem. It's a lot easier to ease into a community when there's only a small number of people. Now is that because of our introversion...
no, I think it's more about it taking a longer time to link up with persons online. In real life you see faces, hear voices etc. you can way quicker get some sense of a person. Seeing that remembering names is something I'm HORRIBLE at (just aweful beyond proportions), I need more time here and I am beginning to recognize perhaps 15 different names that almost make sense to me. But everyday I see like 20 new names popping out and I'm like "god damn it".
 

The Fury

is licking himself.
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Well since I'm not an INTP I often feel that I don't really belong here, there's so much theorizing and abstract thinking going that it can be hard to be a sensor on this forum. At the same times I've made a lot of friends here and I enjoy the random craziness so I don't think I'll be leaving anytime soon.

So around a six for me.
 

transformers

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I'm amazed at how many people feel like they don't fit in. You do know you fit in perfectly, right? Nobody here seems remotely out of place.. in my opinion anyway.
 
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