This is a guide to the friends and family of INTPs so that you can have an easier time understanding where your INTP is coming from and his/her actions. Since INTPs are introverted thinkers, most don't have the easiest time expressing these things out loud.
What things?
Before we start, disregard everything you thought you knew about people and personal interactions.
Why?
Warning: Modifying your behaviour as a result of reading this for the purpose of manipulation will result in further loss of respect from your INTP.
I don't think that's a very good formulation. If you're trying to manipulate someone, you only want his respect while you, well, manipulate him or her. A better phrasing would be "Warning: INTPs value authenticity even more than most other people so following these guidelines just to appeal to an INTP will most likely not result in any satisfactory conclusion for anyone involved."
Though it's still kind of redundant because I have yet to meet someone who says that he or she doesn't like inauthenticity, no matter how hypocritical it may be.
Your INTP is an introvert:
This means he/she will go into her head a lot. A common representation is your absent minded professor. Your INTP will go into his/her head so often that he/she will probably forget what he/she is doing a lot. Unless you have asked about an area of interest, you shouldn't expect him/her to talk too much; especially if you aren't one of his/her close friends.
That seems like an awful way to begin an introvert description. It sounds more like someone who borders on being mentally retarded.
First and foremost, being introverted means to have a lowered
desire for being involved in social situations and they rather spend time on their own.
Introversion does not equal shyness or social anxiety. Nothing stops the INTP from having great
social skills although it is even less common for them than for types with tertiary feeling function.
Unlike extroverts, he/she might not have too many friends. Some INTPs have lots of aqauntinces, but not too many close friends. Some INTPs really like certain people, but he/she will rarely let anyone know who he/she is. He/she also won't like being surrrounded by people much, so he/she won't go to many parties. Most INTPs catch early on that they are different.
Fair enough. The point here is that you shouldn't
force the INTP to participate in social situations. Or any other introverted type, for that matter.
Most INTPs also develop strong trust issues.
What does that even mean? I don't think it's very wise to just throw that line in without any kind of explanation.
So if he/she are letting you in, take it as a compliment because he/she probably won't do it often.
Wait, what? What's the connection to the previous sentence? If I want to visit an INTP, he or she might refuse to open the door out of paranoia?
I don't get it.
You also should realize you aren't going to always like what you hear.
That seems just like a cheap excuse for future douchebaggery. The key word here is
directness.
Generally, we are smart:
We say generally because Myers-Briggs isn't about intellegence. Most of us hate the NT superiority complex.
That part is a catastrophe.
It's more accurate to say that an INTP's main goal is to understand,
Okay.
and his/her preferances generally cause a higher focus rate than any other type.
This causes your INTP to appear intellegent because he/she will look up lots of things and his/her logic will be at a very high level.
causes your INTP to appear intellegent because he/she will look up lots of things and his/her logic will
your INTP to appear intellegent because he/she will look up lots of things and
INTP to appear intellegent because he/she will look
Come
on.
INTPs analyze everything.
Agreed.
Some INTPs call focusing being “in the zone.”
Who? And what does that even mean? I don't think I ever read that here in this forum. Not to mention that it sounds like someone has watched
Stalker too often.
If your INTP finds something that sparks his/her interest, he/she can go at it for hours until he/she has figured it out.
I don't think that this trait is limited to INTPs.
He/she might skip meals if it's consuming him/her enough.
Huh?
INTPs don't like to be interupted from these spurts of interest, and just because he/she is interested in something, doesn't mean he/she will finish the project.
That sounds really vague.
In fact, after it's been fully analyzed, and understood, INTPs don't care about it anymore. INTPs have a million good ideas and a thousand unfinished projects.
That seems more like someone's attempt to disguise his lazyness as something else to sound less negative.
I'm very unhappy with this formulation.
INTPs are also procrastinators. Your INTP will hate schedules and dead lines due to his/her P function.
Due to the P function?! That's an awful statement demonstrates a lack of basic MBTI knowledge.
I really hate this kind of type fatalism. At least you didn't say that INTPs procrastinate because society is to blame.
INTPs are unlikely to follow deadlines.
Okay.
If your INTP doesn't care about something, he/she probably isn't going to do it, or he/she will do the bare minimum; however, an INTP's standards are very high so when he/she does the bare minimum, it tends to be pretty high quality. You know that lazy quiet genius in the back of the class? The one the teacher screams “If you'd actually try, you could do really well!” at? That tends to be an INTP. (Though ENTPs tend to have this quality too.)
Do I really have to point out how ridiculous that quoted part is? Not only implies it that
every INTP in existence is a genius but also that they are holding their true capabilities back
all the fucking time.
No wonder that you guys have self-esteem issues and all kinds of superiority and inferiority complexes when you actually believe that INTP equals genius.
We generally lack confidence:
You declared INTPs to be smarter than any other type and then you say that INTPs lack confidence. That does not compute.
In the original description, it was said that the NT function, which causes a person to strive for competence mixes with the open-endedness of the P function to cause a lack of confidence in INTPs.
What original description? Also, there is no such thing as a NT function.
I know what you mean with that but every person who doesn't know about MBTI will be highly confused by the implied existence of a NT function.
And how do striving for competence and being a Perceiver automatically result in a low self-confidence?
In simpiler terms, your INTP wants to be competent in things but his/her P function causes him/her to see infinite possibilities that he/she is wrong.
What does that even mean?
Though knowledge of a subject may cause him/her to appear arrogant at times, an INTP rarely truly is.
While this might be true, it doesn't compute with what you said before where you implied that all INTPs are geniuses while bringing them in the convenient position to never have to justify this status because when they don't appear as genius, they simply don't care enough about the issue, no?
Your INTP is more likely to believe that he/she is not competent enough almost ever.
Fair enough.
An INTP hold pretty high standards that he/she can't even reach and he/she will judge him/herself far more harshly than he/she will judge anyone else.
That is valid for a lot of types.
Other people are expected to make mistakes, and those mistakes can be criticized but if your INTP makes a mistake in an area of interest, it attacks his/her very core.
That's an odd formulation. INTPs are simply very easy to hurt when you attack the essence of their striving for competence: their intellect, their expertise.
Naturally, this is also valid for a lot of types but the point here is that this is pretty much the
only way to hurt them personally.
The idea that he/she can fail and it's extremely possible for him/her to fail, is terrifying and something he/she will wrestle with on a regular basis.
Same what I wrote at the beginning about your description of introversion: this sounds more like someone who really is neurotic. While the point might be valid, the phrasing is way too drastic.
This is why he/she may actually rarely give him/herself enough credit and may give others too much.
Okay.
INTPs being goal-oriented sounds not only terribly wrong in my ears it also collied with some of your previous statements.
An INTP goes through life trying to understand things. INTPs want to understand as much as possible. An INTP does this by analyzing. Your INTP will analyze constantly. The world exists to be analyzed and understood for him/her. His/her head may always be buzzing with some new theory. INTPs believe the right knowledge at the right time can prevent any error. Your INTP's ultimate goal is to gain knowledge and understand. He/she will ask a lot of questions. Usually, the questions that make you go “WHO CARES?” but if he/she asked, then he/she does.
It makes a lot more sense when you replace
goal with
modus operandi.
Your INTP is going to ask you questions.
While INTPs are very curious individuals (which, again, is by far not limited to INTPs) I don't remember them to ask people more questions than any other type.
Except when we talk about young INTPs or when it comes to a field of their expertise.
They do this to bounce ideas off you or because they are having trouble figuring it out.
Figuring what out? What does that sentence mean?
They are also testing their theories in real time.
What does that even mean?
Give your answers honestly and don't give an answer just to give an answer.
Okay.
Your INTP will not look down on you if you don't know the answer. They will look down on you if you are dishonest and probably won't trust you.
INTPs won't trust people who they believe to be dishonest? That seems like an redundant statement.
If you refuse to answer his/her questions, don't expect to be your INTP's friend.
That appears to be a very dubious assertion. I always thought of INTPs to be people who respect the privacy of others because they want them to respect their own privacy as well.
When an INTP figures something out, they consider it to be a truth. They are very careful about how this truth is expressed, but since the feeling is the least developed, they may be longwinded and explanitory. They want to make sure they are accurate. Let them know if they are explaining too much.
Essentially correct but you make it sound like the INTP sees what he figures out to be the absolute truth which I don't believe to be true.
Most of the time, he/she will be extremely quiet. Your INTP wants to observe as much as possible. This causes him/her to appear detached. Most of the time your INTP probably is pretty detached, and often he/she wants to be. An INTP is usually happy is a position where he/she can quitely observe until someone violates one of our principles or make an incorrect statement.
Very clunky formulation. Detachment is one of the best words to describe the essence of what it means to be INTP. Note that this detachment is universal and they can't really choose to be less detached which is why INTPs often are described as schizoid or schizotypal.
INTPs think:
INTPs absolutely LOVE logic. INTPs are extremely logical people. The best way of convincing your INTP to do anything is to give him/her a logical reason. An INTP can't argue with logic, and if you disregard a logical solution, your INTP is probably going to lose a little respect for you. As much as an INTP hates being illogical, he/she will tend to love being nonsensical. Logical nonsense is some of the most fun an INTP has with others.
I don't think you really know what logic actually is.
Since INTPs are almost always thinking, waking up in the middle of the night to write down ideas is normal and not something to be complained about. Ideas come and go and INTPs are forgetful people. Most INTPs also spend a great deal of time on the computer researching and posting on forums. The computer gives them a voice they might not have because they can formulate their ideas before sending them out. When communcating on the computer with an INTP, practicing basic grammar is prefered and make sure to be thoughtful with your words.
You forgot to add 'self-deprecating humour' to the list of INTP traits.
INTPs have a very clever and warped sense of humor. An INTP tends to be the only ones laughing at his/her jokes because they either take a double summersault of imagination, are silly puns/alliteration/oxymorons, or they go way over other people's heads. INTPs are cynics and sarcastic, usually laughing at some random thought in his/her head. If asked and he/she says “Nevermind” he/she probably doesn't think you will get it or that it will take too much energy to explain. He/she is usually right too, because he/she learned from experience.
That sounds more like a psychopath.
Your INTP will learn from experiences as far as social interactions and handling emotions go. Putting him/her in uncomfortable situations that he/she end up learning from, usually causes him/her to thank you later; however, the last thing you want to do is force him/her into anything. He/she will become extremely stubborn if forced because if he/she hasn't had time to make the decision on his/her own, his/her independent nature will fight it furiously. Give your INTP time to analyze.
Okay, that doesn't sound too wrong.
It's Never Too Precise! (INTP get it?)
Uhm, yeah.
INTPs can be quite annoying when he/she corrects grammer.
You gotta be... is this some kind of clever parody by now?
Though most of the time, he/she realizes you don't care. You jerks! (Just kidding) Usually corrections will only come when speaking to him/her. Now if you attack one of your INTP's principles, he/she will attack. His/her words become swords and he/she has the ability to cut deep, usually immediately disarming the person. There's almost always a bite because he/she can't hide that the attack makes him/her think you are stupid. This causes a lot of these kind of fights to quickly become physical ones. If your INTP doesn't learn to control his/her words, he/she can unintentionally hurt everybody. Since his/her feeling side is the least developed, he/she is unaware, and/or doesn't care. An ignorant statement will cause him/her to correct you or at least be sorely tempted to. Another goal of INTPs is to provide clarity. He/she will often suspect he/she ais the only one who can do so. If your INTP corrects you, don't take it personally. He/she usually means no harm, he/she is just providing clarity. This does not mean your INTP likes you any less or is no longer friends with you. It means you made an incorrect statement that he/she caught.
Seems about right. Though being a grammar nazi for no reason is
not a good thing.
INTPs don't care about outside appearences, and have been called the least demanding of all types in relationships. This makes living with your INTP pretty easy except for a common problem: the routine work of cleaning doesn't usually appeal to him/her. When an INTP live alone, there aren't many decorations. He/she has basic utilities and technology and will be happy with that alone. It is common for a corner to be filled with a pile of stuff. That pile is actually invisible to your INTP. If he/she sets something down because he/she don't need it, and aforementioned item doesn't move for 48 hours, it will become invisible to your INTP. The value of an item will depend on it's usefulness.
A lot of this applies to other types as well, especially INTJs. The thought that a J equals cleanliness is nothing but a myth.
INTPs are remarkably oblivious. If your INTP enters a new place, he/she cares about the ambiance of it, not the actual details. In fact, the only things he/she will notice are things he/she is interested in, anything else needs to be pointed out to him/her. He/she may not be able to tell you anything about the appearance of a person he/she talks to on a regular basis. INTPs have been known to get a friend's hair color wrong after knowing them for 2 years. Okay, it's usually not THAT extreme, but INTPs usually can't tell you what shirt aforementioned person was wearing two minutes after talking to them.
That seem more like a common trait of N types.
Time doesn't exist to an INTP. Your INTP will probably bring up something you said a week earlier and expand on it now. He/she may even use it in an argument. When an INTP says something, it remains true he/she says otherwise. Your INTP will assume the same from you. This is partially because of the P function being adaptive. Sometimes coming up with answers takes some time but because the INTP has adapted and given themselves the time they need to come up with an answer, the answer is honest regardless of when it comes out.
Huh?
INTPs are firm believers in principles;
No they aren't.
however, this does not mean they follow all the rules. Obviously a rule that violates a principle will not be followed. Also the principle that rules are just attempts to make principles black and white will cause some INTPs to break rules. For example, telling your INTP “Do not procrastinate, you will never get things done well” will cause the INTP to further procrastinate simply to show you the principle of quality not coming from the time spent on a project.
So INTPs are basically all passive-aggressive?
Wandering around alone muttering to his/herself is very normal behaviour. Fe users of any kind have the ability to create interactions in their head. It's similar to imaginary friends that don't leave our head. Your INTP is making his monologue a dialogue in order to more effeciently run his/her thoughts on whatever subject they are going through. His/her Ne is showing him/her lots of possibilities and sometimes it's easier to shift through them by talking to his/herself as if there were two of him/her.
That sounds like INTPs all hear voices in their heads.
In contrast, your INTP remember almost everything you tell him/her. Knowledge and ideas are extremely important to him/her. Everything he/she says, he/she considers important, so not listening to him/her will hurt him/her. The last thing your INTP wants to do is upset anybody they respect (unless of course they violate one of his/her principles) and he/she is probably a great listener. So if he/she see something is wrong, and asks about it, don't tell him/her “Nothing”. If you do, your INTP will understand that you don't want to talk about it, but he/she will speculate on what happened and usually come to the conclusion that he/she did something wrong to upset you. This may also cause him/her to withdraw to avoid upsetting you further. So a better response may be “I don't want to talk about it,” and maybe something about it being unrelated to what's going on now. This may or may not cause us to think it's our fault still, but it's less likely. ****You have to be very straightforward with your INTP.
Note:This may not apply if we know you pretty well. This is because we start to recognize your common emotions.
This whole passage consists of commonplaces.
This is the most hypocritical thing, but your INTP will say “nothing” when asked what's wrong quite a bit too. Again, your INTP doesn't want to upset anybody he/she respects/cares about, and he/she doesn't open up easily; however, if he/she says “I'm just thinking” then there is truly nothing wrong, he/she is just thinking. Some INTPs love being asked “What about?” but a lot of the time, he/she is trying to figure it out and interrupting his/her train of thought further will annoy him/her. If you do ask what your INTP is thinking about, he/she will note that you are interested and maybe a few minutes later, he/she will begin telling you. If you aren't that interested, or your INTP seems to be making it too complicated, tell him/her. BE STRAIGHTFORWARD. He/she won't get offended most of the time. If you really want to avoid offending him/her, ask for the basic details. Don't be afraid to ask questions, INTPs usually love getting a new prespective and ****always love discussion.
Note: INTPs want substance in their discussions. Your INTP won't appreciate small talk.
Okay. Also a lot of commonplaces but at least it's not wrong.
When talking to your INTP, the underdeveloped feeling is a good thing to keep in mind. This means that emotions are the most draining part of them. Your INTP has emotions like everyone else but when he/she expresses them, you will notice that the emotions come out almost childishly. If you tell your INTP an emotional story, chances are you won't get a sympathy discussion. Your INTP is going to look at the situation logically and give you logical solutions. This is the only way he/she knows how to help a person and this can be frustrating to both parties.
You should replace
logical with
rational.
The underdeveloped feeling also means facial expression is not a good indicator of mood. It is a good idea to recognize your INTP's “default” expression. Until your INTP really thinks about it, he/she usually can't tell you how he/she is feeling. Emotions are messy and get in the way of the objective thinking your INTP is trying to achieve. So questions like “Are you alright?” are usually annoying or at least confusing.
This also means some INTPs have trouble reading body language. Though experience can teach us what these subtle hints mean, INTPs prefer for you be straightforward. Ask your INTP directly and they will probably give it to you as far as that's possible.
Okay.
INTPs like to debate. Your INTP will play the devil's advocate. This is because his/her Ne is trying to see all points of view. It does not mean he/she isn't listening to you. On the contrary, it means he/she wants you to back up your point. INTPs never take an opinion based on authority. Everyone is going to be scrutinized equally including his/herself. Don't take offense or get your feelings hurt by something said in a debate. You will at the very least confuse your INTP and at worst discourage him/her to the point of withdrawl.
I don't really see why someone would conclude that the INTP is not listening because he plays the devil's advocate but... yeah.
This also means that if you are interested in forming a romantic relationship with an INTP. Tell them. Most INTPs aren't great on picking up subtle hints but this is more true in romance than anything else. Once again you have to be very straightforward.
This is very true.
INTPs will have a lot of trouble expressing emotions. Words cannot convey emotions for INTPs. Most INTPs use music or art or photography to express their emotions. INTPs can't listen to music to change their mood, instead they listen to music that goes with how they feel. Part of this is that INTPs view emotions as somewhat unchangable.
"Music or art or photography" is very clunky but at least it's about right.
INTPs and relationships:
Friendships with INTPs depend on you. They also depend on what your INTPs intuition says about you. Trust rarely happens immediately, and always must be earned. Usually your INTP will resemble a chameleon when talking with people. He/she will mimic your mood. A jolly person will bring him/her out of his/her shell as much as that is possible, and a serious person will find a serious INTP staring back at them. Close friends may notice this when your INTP is telling you that he/she is upset, but then a jolly person comes along and start making jokes, and suddenly, it seems your INTP has changed moods completely. This stems from his/her want to understand. He/she is trying to get in the mind of the other person to understand them and decide something about them like their intentions for example. If you notice your INTP doing this with you, be flattered, you are the focus of his/her busy mind.
What? So any kind of relationship is my responsibility and even when the INTP actly like a complete idiot it's my fault? From this statement I hear the same kind of arrogance I adressed before in the part about INTPs being geniuses. You make it sound like the average INTP thinks everyone else is worth less and the friendship he gives is a special good that is extremely valuable and if you want this good, you better work hard for it! I don't think that there are a lot of people who find such one-sided relationships are especially desirable.
At least the part about the chameleon trait is about right.
If you do something that hurts your INTP, or if your INTP is upset or angry, it's best to leave him/her alone for a while to process his/her feelings. He/she will probably let you know he/she is upset (even though tit might not show externally, he/she might just tell you, and it would help if you believed him/her), but trying to pester him/her with the problem even further will probably cause more agitation.
Fair enough.
Don't try to "fix" your INTP. He/she is not broken, and if you try to "change him/her for the better," he/she will probably be more reluctant in having any sort of relationship with you. INTPs might be the least likely to ever try to change you, so please don't try to change your INTP.
That is valid for
every relationship. Attempting to change your partner with the wooden hammer
never works out.
Actions speak louder than words to an extent. If your actions go against your words, then your actions will be how your INTP judges you. If your actions go along with your words, then your words will have more power and speak louder to your INTP. Fear the INTPs intuition like a vampire fears daylight, if your actions were meant to decieve, you WILL be found out.
That had me laughing. My experience taught me that INTPs are pretty bad when it comes to figuring out any kind of fraud and many of them seem to be rather gullible.
Romantic relationships are different. They are usually unchartered territory and don't come easy to an INTP. In fact, your INTP might be a little scared of them. Using his/her feeling side, letting his/her emotions take control or even sometimes just expressing them, will make your INTP feel quite vulnerable. Emotions are alogical, meaning they aren't logical or illogical, and some INTPs dismiss them alltogether as illogical. ****You can help be an influence on how an INTP views emotions.
Note: As INTPs mature they become better at expressing their emotions but they need to be taught that emotions are not something to fear. Remember an INTP learns by experience so to understand emotions are okay, your INTP needs to experience expressing their emotions without harm.
I think you said all of this before.
-Do give your INTP time to respond. He/she has to analyze and decide what to say. A delayed response doesn't make the statement any less true. Time doesn't exist to an INTP. If he/she reaches an answer fast, the answer is no different if he/she waits an hour and then answers. Sometimes coming up with the answer takes him/her an hour. He/she will say it the second he/she figures it out, but you have to give him/her the time to work it out.
This too.
-Your INTP wants you to believe he/she can take care of themselves.
The 'word' believe has no place in this sentence. INTPs value independence and privacy as part of theim being detached.
-When conflict happens and an INTP leaves, they are analyzing the conflict. Best to leave them alone.
-He/she needs alone time, let him/her have it.
We had that already.
-If your INTP comes to you with the problem, or really any problem, "I'm so sorry" isn't a great answer, though it's sweet and everything, we want answers or a chance to bounce ideas off.
O... kay?
-For optimum respect, do your research and help your INTP bounce ideas off of you.
Wait, what research?
-If your INTP continues to bring up other points in a discussion, do not continue to say the exact same thing or get angry at him/her. Please understand that he/she is just bringing up all possible views and it doesn't mean he/she is not listening to you or considering your input. he/she is, he/she just want to filter it and check it for validity.
That seems redundant.
-If your INTP criticizes something you do, don't be offended. He/she is probably trying to help you.
Why not? I don't think that just being INTP puts you above criticism or being offensive.
-Tell your INTP if they did something to hurt you.
Fair enough.
-Don't lie even to spare feelings.
That seems very shortsighted.
-Ask for your INTP's attention, do not interupt him/her.
That should be obvious to everyone who doesn't have inferior Fe.
-Do give him/her choices. INTPs are stubborn as hell if forced into something.
Why do I get the feeling this is all about making it as convenient as possible for the INTP, no matter the consequences?
-Do listen to your INTP. Unlike INTJs, INTPs lack confidence. Your INTP will withdraw if he/she thinks you don't think what he/she is saying is important, and then he/she won't tell you anything because he/she won't know if it will be important to you or not. He/she will usually assume not.
Huh.
-Do tell your INTP things. INTPs are great listeners and usually care about what you have to say.
But they don't like smalltalk and now I'm supposed to tell the INTP just 'things'?
-Answer your INTP's questions honestly. Failure to do so will hinder the chances of your INTP taking your seriously or trusting you.
Failure to do so will also have you go directly to jail. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.
-Your INTP may lack assertiveness, but don't think you can treat him/her as a doormat and get away with it.
Why not?
-When your INTP makes something work and it does work, it means it is working whether or not you understand how it is working.
What does that even mean?
-Your INTP expects to expect nothing from you. Since INTPs are fair people he/she expects you to expect nothing of them in return.
Aha.
-INTPs enjoy complex problems because simple problems are understood easily. Your INTP actually enjoys difficult problems.
That sounds very redundant.
-INTPs are not lazy, they are efficient....... and sometimes INTPs are lazy.
Maybe one day it will become true if you just keep telling yourself that.
-If an INTP gives you advice, ignore at own peril.
I don't think we're going anywhere with 'INTPs are right by default'.
-INTPs are weird, and your INTP may in fact derive pride from being perceived as such.
Okay.
-Your INTP may not give a damn about you
That doesn't sound like someone I would want to have a relationship with.
No you?
-Your INTP may be long winded in explaining things, keep this in mind before you ask for an explination.
That doesn't appear to be a defining trait of the INTP.
-Any argument can be ended with “Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries” XD
Wow...
-“I don't know” is a valid answer and means just that from your INTP. Your INTP will also take this answer at face value.
This is right.
-Be openminded.
-Sitting and staring blankly=/=stupidity.
-Distant=/=stupid.
Could there be a more bland statement about INTPs?
-If all else fails, email your INTP. This is your surest form of communication.
Okay.
-If all else fails, email your INTP. This is your surest form of communication.
-”I'll be fine if you leave me alone for a while” is a true statement. It also doesn't necissarily mean your INTP doesn't like you. He/she just wants to sort things out alone. This is how INTPs sort everything out.
-Don't tell your INTP you need something done “right now” so that he/she drops everything and does it if you didn't really need it done for another hour.
-If you refuse to answer questions, don't expect to become an INTP's friend.
We had all of this already and even if not, it barely says anything.
-Do realize that a relationship with an INTP starts with the head and moves toward the heart.
Aphorism time?
-Do realize that if your INTP says he/she loves you, it's an extremely deep love. INTPs are extremely loyal but easily hurt do to carelessness. It's also a hard thing for him/her to say because he/she feels vulnerable
I don't think that the INTP's love is any different from the love of any other type. The thing is just that they will be much more hesitating when it comes to this topic.
Duh.
-Do realize that opening up is HARD. Especially to those with bad experieces. A lot of who an INTP is on the inside is just as much the scars he/she wears as it is his/her ideas.
And the point is... ?
-Don't be surprised if your INTP brings up things that were said a long time ago and incorperates them in a current conversation.
I have a hard time seeing somebody caring or even be surprised by this.
-Do realize that regardless of your INTPs initial response (especially an angry one) He/she can and will go back on it after some analyzation. INTPs value your oppinion but he/she has to filter it and check it for validity.
Okay.
-Your INTP will not take your side in an argument based on friendship, if you are wrong, you are wrong. This doesn't mean you are no longer friends or your INTP thinks you are a bad person. You are just wrong. Don't make a big deal out of nothing.
Now that seems like a worthless friend.
-INTPs already know they are crazy. Your INTP may randomly blurt something out. This is normal.
I see that...
-Do be available, don't be smothering. Let your INTP know that he/she can come to you, but don't demand him/her to all the time.
Huh?
-Do explain things to your INTP. INTPs can learn to pick up on subtle hints, but being straightforward is always perfered.
Okay.
-Remember your INTP isn't being cold or ignoring you just because they aren't talking. They enjoy silence from time to time.
We had that, too.
-Manipulation for your own benefit will end the friendship with your INTP.
INTPs also like to breathe.
-Don't overexplain. That pisses INTPs off to no end. If you want something done, the best way is to tell your INTP “I want this done by this time” and let him/her decide when to do it. He/she WILL do it. He/she just has to be able to DECIDE to do it.
Huh.
-Criticize actions and ideas, with a good point this could bring your INTP closer to you, but do not criticize character. Your INTP may have a fragile ego.
And what if the character is at fault?
-Don't make assumptions or interpretations about your INTP's behaviour. Ask him/her questions about the meaning instead. If you see the behaviour again, do not attribute the same meaning your INTP gave you the last time.
What is the reasoning behind this?
-Statements such as “because I said so” or “I don't care I like it that way” may result in your INTP dismissing you.
I like how that harmonizes with 'Any argument can be ended with, "Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries."'.
-Don't pretend to be interested in what your INTP is interested in to gain favor or friendship.
That seems right.
-Don't try to to change your INTP.
-Don't ignore your INTP. He/she won't like it.
-Never impose beliefs on INTPs.
Yet another bunch of bland statements.
-Never tell your INTP his/her ideas are stupid.
What if said ideas are stupid or even dangerous?
-Never rush your INTP when he is on the toilet or in the shower. You will probably slow them down further because they will begin thinking about how stupid and pointless saying “hurry up” is.
What the hell where you thinking that made you think this belongs in an 'INTP Interaction Manual'?
-Don't play mind games with your INTP. Chances are you WILL be found out.
I very much doubt that and I pointed out above why.
-Don't expect your to respond to physical compliments especially without a reason why. He/she won't believe it at first and usually doesn't care. If you really want to give him/her a compliment, tell him/her how competent or intellegent he/she is, but don't lie to him/her. If he/she doesn't believe it, he/she doesn't believe it. Your INTP will filter out most compliments to check them for validity.
This is about right and I agree that calling them 'intellegent' will be of much use.
-Don't force your INTP. Don't force anything on your INTP. If he/she doesn't have time to make the decision, even if it's something he/she'd normally want to do, he/she actively resist. Give choices, suggestions, and time to decide.
Doesn't that collide with 'be direct'?
-Don't point out the obvious.
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-Don't assume lack of feedback=negative feedback. It doesn't from an INTP. Again, your INTP needs time to filter his/her response.
Okay.
-Don't inturupt your INTPs train of thought. This is the most annoying thing in the world. Emergencies are an exception.
Is pointing out the obvious an emergency?
-Your INTP will only do something if it is interesting or if he/she understands the reason behind it. Keep this in mind before asking something. INTPs usually don't mind helping.
I agree with this.
-Don't plan every moment of your INTPs life. INTPs hate schedules.
J types also eat children and cancel your favorite TV shows.
--INTPs don't like being vulnerable and may have trouble expressing themselves.
I have yet to meet someone who actually enjoys being vulnerable.
-Don't lie to your INTP. INTPs absolutely loathe being lied to. Your INTP is searching for truth, lies only make that harder. Actually....
-Don't betray your INTP's trust. Realize that hurting your INTP hurts the people currently or in the future who care about him/her. INTPs withdraw when hurt and are burdened with the sense of impending failure. This means that someone else who cares about him/her might have to work harder to show your INTP that it is safe to open up/trust and all of that kind of stuff.
-short version of that, don't betray the trust of/hurt an INTP.
Are you even trying?
-Don't rush opening up. Especially if your INTP was hurt earlier on. The fact that he/she isn't opening up doesn't mean he/she doesn't care about you. When your INTP does open up, listen or he/she won't do it anymore. Simply because he/she won't believe you want to know.
Agreed.
-Don't ever doubt that your INTP cares about you. If he/she has said it, it holds true forever. Some INTPs have learned that we need to repeat it for it to continue to hold validity, but you do need to let your INTP know you like being reminded.
Okay seems right enough, I won't point out that this implies that all INTPs mate for life.
-Don't demand too much. A lot of relationships with INTPs end from the other person demanding constant attention or compliments. You won't get that from an INTP.
But how much is too much?
-Don't ever call your INTP negative. Yes, he/she comes off as negative quite a bit, but in his/her mind he/she is being realistic and looking at all the possibilities.
Why not call the INTP negative when the INTP is negative?
- Your INTP isn't rejecting what you are saying. When he/she plays the devil's advocate, he/she is looking at all possible angles. Believe it or not, you are helping your INTP see these perspectives a lot easier and helping him/her make more informed decisions.
Huh.
-Don't ask if you don't want an honest answer. Yes, those jeans make you look fat. Actually the fact that you are fat makes you look fat. Your INTP will probably not be that harsh but if you ask, we are going to answer truthfully. Honesty means a lot to us.
It's okay if an INTP is a douchebag because he's an INTP so it's alright.
-Stupid questions to your INTP will get stupid/sarcastic responses out of your INTP.
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-Don't assume all of these things are true for all INTPs
It's not very clever to put this
at the very end.
-NEVER tell your INTP that he/she MUST do anything. He/she doesn't HAVE to do anything, not eat, drink, mow the lawn, or sleep. The only thing your INTP MUST do is die.
...but it's okay if you make a whole catalog with stuff other people should do?
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Conclusion: This whole 'INTP Interaction Manual' so far is a complete disaster. Not only does it reek of extremely flawed Jungian and MBTI typology but also depicts INTPs as two-dimensional people without a real personality, not unlike toasters. The worst part is the 'INTPs are always right, do everything to please your INTP and shut the hell up'-vibe I get from a lot of points here and the overall double-standard not to mention all the hypocritical and self-contradictory points.
There is no structure or red string whatsoever and a lot of typos and grammar errors.
The redundance is also redundant.
If I had never met an INTP before and somebody asked me if I wanted to, based on this 'INTP Interaction Manual'; my honest answer would be: I'd rather not.
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