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Ask a Saint anything

Anthile

Steel marks flesh
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Since I recently achieved sainthood (long story), you may ask me anything you like. Bear in mind that sainthood does not equal omniscience or brings any kind of other supernatural powers - at least not of the nature I could demonstrate to you.

Please refrain from posing silly, inane or 'trick' questions. Those will be removed right away.
 

Anthile

Steel marks flesh
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Yes, yes I do. In fact, it's even my favorite film of all time.
 

s0nystyle

La la la la la!
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how long does it take to become a saint? is it better to get a bachelors in Bio-engineering or become a saint :o
 

Fukyo

blurb blurb
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Please refrain from posing silly, inane or 'trick' questions. Those will be removed right away.

Yes, sir. Of course, sir.

wrz8lc.jpg



Prepare to confront the council of INTPness, where we nitpick every thing you say until you start headesking and argue any word randomly taken from your speech for entertainment purposes, for the examination of your claims of saint hood.

Our representative will meet with you shortly:
2utnd69.png
 

Anthile

Steel marks flesh
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Could I become a saint?

Everyone can become a saint.


how long does it take to become a saint? is it better to get a bachelors in Bio-engineering or become a saint :o

There is no specific amount of time necessary. It just happens one day.


Yes, sir. Of course, sir.

wrz8lc.jpg



Prepare to confront the council of INTPness, where we nitpick every thing you say until you start headesking and argue any word randomly taken from your speech for entertainment purposes, for the examination of your claims of saint hood.

Our representative will meet with you shortly:
2utnd69.png


But why does that top hat wear a dolphin? This world sure is full of wonders.
 

Tyria

Ryuusa bakuryuu
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How did you achieve your sainthood? I'm interested in the story if you're willing to share it.
 

Cogwulf

Is actually an INTJ
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Do saints get special t shirts? (or any other form of attire)

and also...
can I become a saint even after stabbing loads of people to death?

And another question that even God himself didn't know when I asked him...
where can I get my parking validated?
 

Melkor

*Silent antagonist*
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It was once said of Melkor 'He could get a saint in trouble'

I ask you sir, are you that saint?

Also, have you ever considered becoming a super-sayint?
 

Claverhouse

Royalist Freicorps Feldgendarme
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can I become a saint even after stabbing loads of people to death?


Hey, if a vile little fuck like Domingo de Guzmán managed it...


And another question that even God himself didn't know when I asked him...
where can I get my parking validated?


You should not trouble the Saint with impious vanities.


However, I can tell you. 1803, Hulsom Buildings, Main Street, Why, Arizona, 85321.




And my question: Do vampires have Free Will ?





Claverhouse :phear:
 

Jah

Mu.
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Oslo, Norway.
I am actually a card-carrying Pope or the Erisian Church,
and on the back of my Pope-card it says:

"The rights of a Pope include but are not necessarily limited to:
  1. To invoke infallibility at any time, including retroactively.
  2. To completely rework the Erisian Church.
  3. To baptise, bury, and marry (with the permission of the deceased in the latter two cases).
  4. To excommunicate, de-ex-communicate, re-ex-communicate, and de-re-ex-communicate (no backsies!) both his-/her-/it-/them-/your-/our-/His-/Her-/It-/Them-/Your-/Our-self/selves and others (if any).
  5. To perform all rites and functions deemed inappropriate for a Pope of Discordia."
As a pope I am also entitled the right to canonize anyone into a saint (This is something only a Pope may do.)

I am also licensed to perform pontifications, and can make anyone a rightful and infallible pope of the Discordian faith.



But I recognize that this here Anthile is a true Saint, and he is also now one of Our saints, within the reaches of my Catmas, and may achieve enlightenment, if he chooses to repeat the woolly mantra of the Three-way-logic: "Everything is true in some sense, false in some sense and meaningless in some sense. True and false in some sense, True and Meaningless in some sense. False and meaningless in some sense, and true, false and meaningless in some sense." If repeated 666 times, he may achieve supreme enlightenment... in some sense.
 

Cognisant

cackling in the trenches
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Define God, because if nobody has a set definition of god, then the question if or not one believes in god's existence is moot because it's impossible to believe in something's existence if one does not know what that something is, i.e. the existence they're believing in.

For example:
You can say god exists without a definition of god, but then who's to say I'm not god?
After all, I exist.

(I don't believe I'm god btw, but then perhaps I'm in denial)
 

Claverhouse

Royalist Freicorps Feldgendarme
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Location
Between the Harz and Carpathians
Define God, because if nobody has a set definition of god, then the question if or not one believes in god's existence is moot because it's impossible to believe in something's existence if one does not know what that something is, i.e. the existence they're believing in.


Therefore ants stepped upon by a human foot are wrong in assuming that a higher power --- a 'human' --- is crushing them, solely because the idea of a human is inconceivable to their tiny, tiny minds ?


For example:
You can say god exists without a definition of god, but then who's to say I'm not god?
After all, I exist.


The fact you exist, and God Exists, happens to be coincidence. Many things exist > existence is not proof of divinity. An individual tree, an individual trogon or an individual teabagger plucked from the ranks of teabaggers might be God Almighty, but you would need more than the fact such exists as suspicion.




Claverhouse :phear:
 

Cognisant

cackling in the trenches
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Therefore ants stepped upon by a human foot are wrong in assuming that a higher power --- a 'human' --- is crushing them, solely because the idea of a human is inconceivable to their tiny, tiny minds?
They can prove they're being stepped on and they can call whatever it is that's stepping on them whatever they want, its existence isn't in question.

Meanwhile god's existence is, and I can't help but question a belief in something's existence if one doesn’t know what that something is, since believing in what is apparently by nature a mystery strikes me as odd since most beliefs exist to be proven, yet were we to believe the hype god's existence cannot be proven... it's belief in believing itself, what I personally would call delusion.

The fact you exist, and God Exists, happens to be coincidence. Many things exist > existence is not proof of divinity. An individual tree, an individual trogon or an individual teabagger plucked from the ranks of teabaggers might be God Almighty, but you would need more than the fact such exists as suspicion.
But that's exactly my point, you're the one who started this little game, or to play with your words: To believe god's existence you would need more than the fact such exists as suspicion.

I can come up with all sorts of silly little beliefs to mock you, and who are you to say they're invalid whilst your own remain unproven, i.e. I can invalidate any & all belief based arguments by using them against you, the onus isn’t on me to prove anything untill you can prove me wrong, which is your own logic btw :D

I believe there is no god, now say I'm wrong, go on, you know you want to.
 

Claverhouse

Royalist Freicorps Feldgendarme
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They can prove they're being stepped on and they can call whatever it is that's stepping on them whatever they want, its existence isn't in question.


You are confusing the fact that as a human spectator you 'know' what is happening, that a human exists and that he is stepping on the ant; whilst the ant has no knowledge of humans and that the only proof he has that the human ( something greater than himself ) exists is the effect of that other being's action. The fact he cannot conceive of a human does not mean that humans don't exist. Plus the thoughts of ants are wholly unimportant to a human...


I tried to find out the relative sizes of an ant to a human, although it's obvious that an ant can't see something human-sized, anymore than we could see Mount Everest whilst standing at it's foot. Google got boring, so I'll go with ants being either 1/16th of an inch or 1/8th. However, this thread on falling ants indicates that:

At terminal speed, air resistance balances weight, so

The "killability" of a fall relates to the total kinetic energy per unit mass of the body absorbing the kinetic energy. This is simply proportional to v^2. But from above formula, v^2 is proportional to weight over area. Since weight is proportional to length^3, and area to length^2, v^2 is proportional to length. An ant is one thousandth the linear size of a man, so its fall from a height sufficient to achieve terminal velocity (which BTW is only a few inches; ESB not needed) has only 1/1000 the killing power of a fall of a person from ESB
.
I haven't the faintest ability to follow that uninteresting math, so I'll go along with ants are pretty small...


One further reference comes from the ever-trustworthy scientific resource that is 1930s popular science magazines:

Will Monster Insects Rule the World ?


The bees, because they work for man in producing honey, are highly regarded and much has been written about their marvelous organization in the hive, yet the little known ants are far superior in their civilization.


Consider that under a matriarchal form of government they maintain a standing army of soldier ants to protect the city, a vast corps of workers to build and feed them all, a corps of nurses to take care of the young, that they maintain herds of cattle --- other types of insects --- which they milk to augment the food supply, and that they are the only form of life aside from man that has ever imprisoned slaves to work for them.


As builders the ants, at least some species found in Africa, are far superior to man. The tallest man-made structure to date the new Chrysler building in New York is only some 1040 feet high, equivalent to the combined height of about 173 six-foot men. Yet ant nests, built by insects not over one-eighth of an inch high, often reach a height of 20 feet or more. That’s 1888 times the height of the builder, and to equal that, men would have to build more than two miles into the air 11,328 feet, to be exact.


The vital evidence from that being the statement that with all their wonders of civilisation, they are still kinda small. And ill-informed regarding the universe.


Actually, the scientific paper goes on to quote Otto:

Society, in fact, is so well organized in antdom that it is not remarkable that the great Bismarck once said: “If I had to choose the form I would rather live in again, I think it would be as an ant. Just see: this little creature lives under a perfect political organization. All ants are obliged to labor, to lead a useful life; all are industrious, and perfect subordination prevails, with discipline and order. They are happy because they work.

Alas, Yanks rarely appreciate Germans being ironic...

Then again, I prefer his famous quote that 'If you turn over one square foot of grass, the life there will appall you.'.





Meanwhile god's existence is, and I can't help but question a belief in something's existence if one doesn’t know what that something is, since believing in what is apparently by nature a mystery strikes me as odd since most beliefs exist to be proven,


According to whom ? God ?







But that's exactly my point, you're the one who started this little game, or to play with your words: To believe god's existence you would need more than the fact such exists as suspicion.


That wording implies God exists anyway... just that a belief that He exists is irrational because unprovable.

Actually, I just pointed out that existence is not a proof of divinity: even pantheists don't claim that each existing life-force is the One and Only God, merely that put together All Things are Allfather... God may exist, but many other things have mere existence.



I can come up with all sorts of silly little beliefs to mock you, and who are you to say they're invalid whilst your own remain unproven, i.e. I can invalidate any & all belief based arguments by using them against you, the onus isn’t on me to prove anything untill you can prove me wrong, which is your own logic btw :D

I believe there is no god, now say I'm wrong, go on, you know you want to.


What own beliefs ? I'm just arguing here.

Anyway, I think we may be at cross-purposes since my position is that belief and faith, whether in a God or that God does not exist, is wholly immaterial to whether He Is, or Is Not. And that our opinions don't matter in the least to Him, if He Exists.


I don't spend a lot of time considering the opinions of ants...





Claverhouse :phear:
 

Saeros

Destroyer of Worlds
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Tomorrow 9:26 AM
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Messages
244
---
Location
Inside my head.
You are confusing the fact that as a human spectator you 'know' what is happening, that a human exists and that he is stepping on the ant; whilst the ant has no knowledge of humans and that the only proof he has that the human ( something greater than himself ) exists is the effect of that other being's action. The fact he cannot conceive of a human does not mean that humans don't exist. Plus the thoughts of ants are wholly unimportant to a human...
You're assuming that ants can think in the same way that we do? that's an interesting question for the saint: do ants have souls? is the soul responsible for thought, or is it the brain? If it's the brain that's responsible for thought, then here's an interesting tidbit: "An ant brain has about 250,000 brain cells. A human brain has 10,000 million so a colony of 40,000 ants has collectively the same size brain as a human." Would an ant even be able to think "I'm about to be stepped on by something", and once it's stepped on, I assume it wouldn't be able to think anyway :)

My main problem with belief in god is how did anyone arrive at the belief in god? It's almost like someone realised that they couldn't explain how anything worked, sat down, and came up with the concept of an esoteric god to justify their own ignorance (no offense). Of course the sun is obviously a god in a flaming chariot, and the tide is caused by a god of the ocean, and lightning is caused by Thor, and of course
Osiris is the god of the underworld, or is it Hades? is Yama really the god of the dead? and of course everything was created by Brahma, or was that Jehovah? and of course when we die, we're carried away by valkyries to valhalla, or by angels to heaven? or are we reincarnated? Because we can't simply cease to exist after we die, that would be rediculous :) Sorry for dragging that out, but I think you'll get my point.
 

bananaphallus

found out
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Why did you/someone else delete the 'Justifying Texas' thread?
 

Saeros

Destroyer of Worlds
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Inside my head.
Anyway, I think we may be at cross-purposes since my position is that belief and faith, whether in a God or that God does not exist, is wholly immaterial to whether He Is, or Is Not. And that our opinions don't matter in the least to Him, if He Exists.
Doesn't it say somewhere in the bible that people who don't believe in god, or believe in a different god, will be punished for all eternity? It sounds like he cares. Also, what kind of an egocentric being would demand that his creations worship him? That sounds much more like the request of a human to me.
 

Anthile

Steel marks flesh
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How did you achieve your sainthood? I'm interested in the story if you're willing to share it.

Well, the story is not really of importance. Important is only what we do and not where we came from. It would be impossible to reproduce it and let's just say it happened one day.


Do saints get special t shirts? (or any other form of attire)

and also...
can I become a saint even after stabbing loads of people to death?

And another question that even God himself didn't know when I asked him...
where can I get my parking validated?

1. No.

2. That depends.

3. As I pointed out, I am not omniscient.


It was once said of Melkor 'He could get a saint in trouble'

I ask you sir, are you that saint?

Also, have you ever considered becoming a super-sayint?


1. I don't think so.

2. No.


And my question: Do vampires have Free Will ?

There is no such thing as free will. Even if there is, our free will is severely limited. The history of humanity is the history of a race that constantly overestimates itself and cries bitter tears when it finds out the bitter truth.


Define God, because if nobody has a set definition of god, then the question if or not one believes in god's existence is moot because it's impossible to believe in something's existence if one does not know what that something is, i.e. the existence they're believing in.

For example:
You can say god exists without a definition of god, but then who's to say I'm not god?
After all, I exist.

(I don't believe I'm god btw, but then perhaps I'm in denial)

I'm an atheism saint. Gods of any kind are not of my department.



That depends on the definitions you use.


Therefore ants stepped upon by a human foot are wrong in assuming that a higher power --- a 'human' --- is crushing them, solely because the idea of a human is inconceivable to their tiny, tiny minds ?





The fact you exist, and God Exists, happens to be coincidence. Many things exist > existence is not proof of divinity. An individual tree, an individual trogon or an individual teabagger plucked from the ranks of teabaggers might be God Almighty, but you would need more than the fact such exists as suspicion.




Claverhouse :phear:

Actually, ants wouldn't work if you made them bigger because of the spiracles. Also, chitin is really worthless at a human size. So if you see any kind of oversized insects in fiction, it's exactly that: fiction.


Neither! It would be called Autocoitus...I guess.

:confused: Dear, Saint. Would you kindly answer me why did I feel the urge to answer that question above?

Because you have no free will.


Why did you/someone else delete the 'Justifying Texas' thread?

Because at least one person wouldn't recognize a "We make fun of regional stereotypes" thread and be personally insulted if I insulted their favorite state.
 

Da Blob

Banned
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The instructions in the Bible are for our benefit and not God's... It really is not hard to see that God does not benefit from anything a human could do...
One can not prove God to be an Object, nor can One disprove. So it is simply a matter of the exercise of free will; whether to believe in Him - or not. One can believe in a wonderful afterlife and thereby gain access to it and God. One can also ignore the opportunity offered...

Edit: Saint Ant Hill (e)???
 

Tyria

Ryuusa bakuryuu
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Have you changed at all since you became a saint?
 

s0nystyle

La la la la la!
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Beneath the stars
do saints have a meeting once a month to discuss who else becomes a saint etc?
 

Saeros

Destroyer of Worlds
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244
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Inside my head.
Do you have to perform a miracle to become a saint?
 

Crazythinker1

Quiet, I'am thinking
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in my head
Why would one want to become a saint? Whats the benefit?:confused:
 

Claverhouse

Royalist Freicorps Feldgendarme
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Between the Harz and Carpathians
'Conjectures' is entirely apt...

You get to do stuff...


The lives of the just will in themselves be a condemnation of the wicked (Matthew 21:41), whose punishment they will publicly approve. But the Apostles will be judges of the world in a sense yet more exact, for the promise that they shall sit upon twelve thrones judging the twelve tribes of Israel (Matthew 19:28) seems to imply a real participation in judicial authority. According to a very probable opinion, this prerogative is extended to all who have faithfully fulfilled the counsels of the Gospel (Matthew 19:27-28). Nothing certain is known as to the manner in which this delegated authority will be exercised. St. Thomas conjectures that the greater saints will make known the sentence of Christ to others.

THE LAST JUDGEMENT



Publication information Written by J.A. McHugh. Transcribed by Donald J. Boon. The Catholic Encyclopedia, Volume VIII. Published 1910. New York: Robert Appleton Company. Nihil Obstat, October 1, 1910. Remy Lafort, S.T.D., Censor. Imprimatur. +John Cardinal Farley, Archbishop of New York.



After that, it may be a bit of a let down...


All Judaic religions are demented. Why anyone took any notice of the idiot babblings of a tribe of over-excited ESFJs from the desert is beyond me.




Claverhouse :phear:



Which reminds me... A month or so ago I was going to cut/paste some amusing stuff about the RCs neat little burial plot for unbaptised babes in Northern Ireland, into my mini-blog here.

From the link above, we are aware of what happens to those who die before Holy Water is applied...

As to children that have personally done neither good nor evil, the baptized must be distinguished from the unbaptized. The former appear in the judgment, not to be judged, but only to hold the glory of Christ (Supplement 80:5), while the latter, ranked with the wicked, although not judged, will be enabled to realize the justice of their eternal loss.


I'll have to find it...
 
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