- Local time
- Yesterday, 20:09
- Dec 15, 2018
Nope! Our end point is our death. You will never arrive at the pinnacle of "who you are." You're always who you are, reacting with the stimuli in your environment. New situations reveal things about ourselves: how we cope, how much we can handle emotional and physical stress, etc. We all have potential to be something that isn't what we define ourselves to be in the present. In this, it's important that we learn from those experiences we have and how they've affected us to determine what we need to learn/practice to survive and be contented.Is there a universal end point? Im not familiar with this. Do we all follow a rough sequence of views?
This isn't to say if you've had a bad upbringing and are stupid, you're screwed. More that we are constantly evolving, and dying is the cessation of our change. Everything stops moving, and we are no longer autonomous creatures. It is in death that we have no control over what happens to us, because we no longer have the facilities to change ourselves.
I find it crucial to grip onto the conscious, every-changing mind while we're alive, because we will always become what we think we are. If we think ourselves resilient and flexible, practice these things, that is what we will become in one way or another.
You've said you've done a lot of changing over the last month or so--this is due to some catalyst(s) in your life that have triggered you into remembering the power you have over-yourself. That's part of the ever-unraveling-self. But do you consider this learning experience to have made you into the person you will always be, or have you found a kindled passion to keep growing?
It'd rather not get into it, if you don't mind. I'm not shy about sharing my experiences, but I'm not super comfortable posting exactly what I have on a public forum. Hell, I even keep it out of any non-anonymous social media. It makes me squeamish to have it listen point blank in any public setting.What is the name of your disorder?
Edit: I saw a documentary about people suffering from these hallucinations, being strangled and beaten every night, at the time there was no explanation, so im very curious.
I think @Rebis, @Tenacity, @Kormak and I talked about this a while back on this thread. (I hope Tenacity isn't gone for good, she had the best things to say...)
It's called sleep paralysis. I'm surprised the documentary didn't mention the name at all. (It was Kormak who posted a documentary of sleep paralysis here, somewhere). Yes, your brain wakes up before your body. When we fall asleep, the REM cells at the back of our brains paralyze us so that we don't try to act out our dreams and hurt ourselves. The part of our brain that is also asleep is the frontal cortex, where our systems for organization, language comprehension, and rational operate.
In sleep paralysis, our brain wakes up before our body has been unparalleled. The front systems of our brain will still be down as well, so we're very likely to still "dream" while we're "awake." The part of our brain that is still active is the amygdala and the limbic system, the centers of our brain that handle emotional reactions. The amygdala is responsible for our "fight or flight" reactions, and as such it's impossible for you to really tell yourself something isn't real during sleep paralysis.
I understand this. Before diagnosis, I had them throughout the day, and it just make me so dissociated from everything and everyone around me. I felt like the sound of ears ringing (if that makes sense), and like everything was so far away. I'd wondered if that was what PTSD felt like.When I was younger I got horrible auditory hallucinations and tactile ones, where my hands felt like they were being cut to pieces by wires, every once in a while those sensations come back, I kind of have ptsd from it.
Also something odd, one night I woke up from a nightmare, and the only way I could explain it would be, my brain hadn't woken up completely, I was terrified. There wasn't anything to be terrified of, I was just in a state of pure panic for seemingly no reason.