The Random Thoughts Thread

[Marbles]

That profile picture is too good, it genuinely makes me think of serac as a super-cool western shooter with witty punchlines. Takes shots of alcohol and dishes out bullet shots.

Already feeling those abstinences, I see! We're sorry to have lost you, but the more Irish Whiskey for me How is sobriety working out?

 

[Rebis]

That profile picture is too good, it genuinely makes me think of serac as a super-cool western shooter with witty punchlines. Takes shots of alcohol and dishes out bullet shots.

Already feeling those abstinences, I see! We're sorry to have lost you, but the more Irish Whiskey for me How is sobriety working out?

It's working out well, I was never addicted or anything so no withdrawal! Haven't really thought about it that much

EDIT: This is my 911th post

 

[Marbles]

But arent you feeling the withdrawal of happines, of life? Aqua vitae, laddie!

 

[Rebis]

But arent you feeling the withdrawal of happines, of life? Aqua vitae, laddie!

It was never about happiness it was just sticking a spanner in the cog of self-awareness! I did have a laugh when you said "Aqua vitae, laddie!" it reminded me of the crazy scotsman, funny guy:

 

[Kormak]

e_e was substituting for the boss today. We loaded a truck full of products and the idiot driver locked his keys in the cabin. For the first time in my life I had to break into said truck to unlock it. Sucess.

Does this give an achievement? I feel like I should get some kind of lockpicking skill unlock form this. Too bad I had to drill the lock to turn it.

 

[Marbles]

@Rebis The GABA, though. It reins that blazing mind so it can socialize without exploding. If I only had some focus. My doctor just prescribed some beta blockers. Propanolol, I think it was. Perhaps it shall substitute the booze.

Loved the skit. Gotta grab me some Irn Bru, now. We don't have that here in Norway We just drink soda out of skulls.

Speaking of crows (sorry @Inexorable Username, I have seen those crow vids, they are awesome. By the time I got back to this thread, everyone was on different topics.), I just noticed we have a Corvidae section under smileys. That can't be coincidental.

 

[Rebis]

@Rebis The GABA, though. It reins that blazing mind so it can socialize without exploding. If I only had some focus. My doctor just prescribed some beta blockers. Propanolol, I think it was. Perhaps it shall substitute the booze.

Loved the skit. Gotta grab me some Irn Bru, now. We don't have that here in Norway We just drink soda out of skulls.

Speaking of crows (sorry @Inexorable Username, I have seen those crow vids, they are awesome. By the time I got back to this thread, everyone was on different topics.), I just noticed we have a Corvidae section under smilies. That can't be coincidental.

GABA be good but I get it from exercise anyways. Plus there's the problem of over excited gamma receptors which cause people to crave fatty foods in the morning, when in actuality you're stressing these receptors as GABA transmitters have spent the whole night turning alcohol into acetlylaldehyde. Overuse of depressants slows you down in all areas, I'm looking to speed up. Increase acceleration to100ms in 12.29 seconds

if you do not fit within the bracket of your peers, you have two choices:
-CNS depressants so you can feel comfortable
-Accept that is the case and work to enjoy yourself from there.

I think sedation is easily overabused and it has long-term consequences. I think if you value your abilities then it's best not to sedate yourself long term as you're throwing them away. It depends on your outlook really, each to their own but my abilities now are different from when I was younger, I used to be very fast: I remember the nights I would get so drunk yet I'd remember everything, I'd be able to see people so far up the street and consciously respond, changing direction and the likes to conceal my drunken state, all while being drunk. One of the first times I drunk it was a whole bottle of vodka, I played chess throughout the night in addition to sleep deprivation.

I just feel I've sacrificed my ability to a degree, and now I have a roadplan to regain that. John milton wrote paradise regained 7 years after paradise lost, I started drinking when I was 17 and I'm now 22, so In 18 months it will be regained, by applying knowledge of the brain to restimulate specific regions, increase plasticity, weaken myelinated synapses and forcing my brain to create new ones, and manipulating the function of dopamine to change my reward system. That's what I'm going to do, it is time to reclaim what was lost, not through gradual change but by forfeit.

I drunk alcohol originally to put myself on the level of my friends, but that's not who I am, that was me manipulating neurochemicals by alcohol.

People may be exhausted by my "ambitious" 22 year old ideologue, but I'm sure they were in a similar position at one point, it's simply my turn on the roulette.

 

[Marbles]

Oh, I'm no smarter than my peers, just more easily overstimulated! I'll be careful with medication, for sure, but I think I'd benefit from some. Let me know how the project of regaining focus works out for you. I think I have something called Sensory Processing Disorder, which is characterized by easily being overstimulated by sensory input (I really think it just means your mind is overreactive, whether there is external input, or simply inner rumination). If you find a way to rein in your mind, perhaps it will work for me, too.

 

[Rebis]

Oh, I'm no smarter than my peers, just more easily overstimulated! I'll be careful with medication, for sure, but I think I'd benefit from some. Let me know how the project of regaining focus works out for you. I think I have something called Sensory Processing Disorder, which is characterized by easily being overstimulated by sensory input (I really think it just means your mind is overreactive, whether there is external input, or simply inner rumination). If you find a way to rein in your mind, perhaps it will work for me, too.

I resonate with this when I was younger: I was able to see people from far away and I always saw them first so I was never surprised. I think that added an element of planning to my interactions, I thought about what to say before I was even in their line of sight. I was pretty hyper aware of where everybody was at all times, though as I got older my interest dulled. I associated this with a lack of interest as there would be less reason to track people because I was less interested in interacting with them (through normalisation) , but now I think the lack of interest in those things could be attributed to the intense sensory experience of alcohol and drugs. I miss that awareness. This is also a problem I see when i go to clubs sober: I just can't relax, there's too much going on. My rhythm is broken by my self-awareness, while alcohol was consumed so copiously I could keep little train of thought to maintain my self-awareness.

I think I've learnt how to focus a lot in the last 2 years, but now I'll regain my perceptive ability. I'm starting to see more people on the street instead of retreating to my mind, whether that's a good or bad thing I don't know. For example I avoided an interaction yesterday by seeing them ahead of me and crossing the road, I was out of their peripheral. While I was able to flip between internal/sensory perception in the past, it's dominantly internal.

I guess I miss the control over my environment I had when I could identify people from a far distance and plan for the interaction. In recent past I just wouldn't be interested. It's a rush in itself, being able to predict events before they occur. Akin to the thrill you get when everything works out as planned/intended.

"I told you so!" says RebisOne to RebisTwo
RebisThree onlooks both parties

 

[Marbles]

Being able to turn it off and on is an unfair advantage. I'll have to resort to mead, my man.

Good to see you caught your 911th post. Now watch out for 1337. Btw, I just learned the other day that I was born 1337 o'clock

 

[Rebis]

You have 420 coming up, smoke big doinks in amish

 

[Marbles]

Cannabis is the best to calm my mind. Too bad it isn't legal here. I'll try to find a joint to celebrate my 420th, perhaps even upload a picture (way to make yourself unemployable. I'll shove an egg in my mouth, instead). I guess that drunken forum hangout is never gonna happen, now. Tenacity's gone, and you no longer drink.

 

[Rebis]

It could be a smoke hangout what's the discord? We should do this sometime, weekend preferably or over christmas as we'll have time.

I imagine people will have periods where they're inactive but eventually come back.

 

[Marbles]

Christmas would be great... What was Damien like?

 

[Rebis]

Damien was quiet, he was from san diego in the states. Me, Damien and PJ were good friends. PJ fancied damien, damien was quiet and didn't like the constant flirting but we were all united by talking about technology and other random stuff. I talked about a lot of topics and damien was the guy that talked little but knew exactly what he was talking about. We had a groupchat called 3.1, naming it something related to autism or a joke. We sat beside each other in maths class, he always done homework while I rarely did, I used to copy him at the end of our lunch break: we'd have 5 minutes to do the homework.

He never got into facebook so I haven't had an opportunity to talk to him since I left the school, he's doing computer science at a different university from me. I thought he'd be going to my one since it's way better in league tables.

I don't have much to say about damien, he was quiet but we usually sat beside each other in class. This was for a straight five years. He wasn't intense, I was just very comfortable around him. When I mentioned supped up is because he seems out of his shell as of late, he owns two street/sports cars and was always into computers so probably got a tech job. Seems like an INTJ to me. I think it's the cat photo that draws similarities, a baby cat wearing a tophat looking off into the distance thinking of nobles causes. Pussycat pussycat don't you cry, tomorrow morning will be full of surprise!

I don't think this accurately describes you, maybe it's your passiveness to situations!

 

[Marbles]

Sounds close enough. I'll put on the Damien hat, for the name, if nothing else.

 

[moody]

hen

How did you know?!

 

[Inexorable Username]

@moody

Did you draw the owls yourself?

 

[moody]

@moody

Did you draw the owls yourself?

I wish! No, it’s a picture I found online. I don’t know who the artist is, because it didn’t say. But it is not me! I mean, as long as I’m not using it for any sort of self profit, so it’s okay...though now I feel guilty, and compelled to find the original post and site the artist on my profile....

 

[Inexorable Username]

@moody

Did you draw the owls yourself?

I wish! No, it’s a picture I found online. I don’t know who the artist is, because it didn’t say. But it is not me! I mean, as long as I’m not using it for any sort of self profit, so it’s okay...though now I feel guilty, and compelled to find the original post and site the artist on my profile....

Lol! No, you're fine. Speaking as an artist - I really wouldn't care if you used my pic for your profile pic. In fact, I'd be flattered. Obviously you like the way it looks! It's not like you're pretending you drew it.

I was just gonna say it's creepy XD

 

[peoplesuck]

People need to stop throwing food in the trash. When you do this you are sending all the nutrients to a landfill, contaminating them and making them unusable, so throw it in your yard or spoil your doggo.

 

[moody]

I was just gonna say it's creepy XD

 

[Rebis]

@moody my current hypnagogia has been waking up to what i feel is a mouse crawling over me and trying to befriend me, but i wake up and scare it away since I'm like 100 times bigger. I thoufht i tracked it to a spot in the dark but when i turned on the lights it wasn't there. It's happened on 3 occasions, which is weird because I never really experienced recurrent dreams, or at least not to the degree that people did when they would say "Scary monster tried to kill me every night!"

I kinda want a pet mouse because of the experience

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

 

[Marbles]

People need to stop throwing food in the trash. When you do this you are sending all the nutrients to a landfill, contaminating them and making them unusable, so throw it in your yard or spoil your doggo.

And do you ever stop to consider the welfare of landfill micro-organisms, huh? Well, do you, punk?

@moody I have a sixth sense about you birds...

@Rebis I want a rat, but they only live a couple of years, so I'd be setting myself up for tragedy. I grew up with a dog, but we didn't take care of it as well as we should have (it should have gotten twice the exercise), which is one of my big regrets - no more dogs for me. He was the best, though. Stabijhoun

 

[peoplesuck]

And do you ever stop to consider the welfare of landfill micro-organisms, huh? Well, do you, punk?

All life is equal, continue with your ways. Im not exactly going to stop the world from burning, im just staying here to say, I told you so.

 

[peoplesuck]

I cant tell if im slowly evolving into redbaron, or if im slowly devolving into redbaron

 

[moody]

@moody my current hypnagogia has been waking up to what i feel is a mouse crawling over me and trying to befriend me, but i wake up and scare it away since I'm like 100 times bigger. I thoufht i tracked it to a spot in the dark but when i turned on the lights it wasn't there. It's happened on 3 occasions, which is weird because I never really experienced recurrent dreams, or at least not to the degree that people did when they would say "Scary monster tried to kill me every night!"

I kinda want a pet mouse because of the experience

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

Funny, my first ever hypnagogic hallucination was a mouse repeatedly running into my side and biting me. Your mental mouse was far friendlier than mine. (I remember it so clearly because it freaked me out so much and I kept waking up and checking all over my room). I tend to feel mine more than I see them.

 

[moody]

I have a sixth sense about birds...

Funny, I was just encouraging baby pigeons to fly. Someone told me they didn’t think the pigeons would understand me, so I started making pigeon sounds, and it flew! I’m so proud

 

[peoplesuck]

Someone gave me a late birthday card, and I was informed that I have to thank them over the phone. Im not sure if they are a saint or if they just werent near their phone, but it went to voicemail and we didnt have to have an awkward talk about it.
Please take this to heart next time you send an introvert a birthday card.

 

[peoplesuck]

I kinda want a pet mouse because of the experience

I had two when I was younger, maybe 7. One day I found one of the mice eating the other, it had already eaten its entire head and shoulders.
It was a pretty nice childhood memory. I give it a 8/10
That reminds me of seeing my dog eating its puppy.
That one wasnt very tasteful, maybe a 6/10
The puppy was dead but my little heart didnt care.

 

[peoplesuck]

I cant wait for my nephew to grow up and love all the classics, because I gave him good taste in music.

Spoiler

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cleCtBP0o5Y

 

[Rebis]

I got my haircut recently, missing my old hair:

Long vs short what'd'ya say? (I'm biased with the long hair)

 

[peoplesuck]

I got my haircut recently, missing my old hair:

Long vs short what'd'ya say? (I'm biased with the long hair)

short hair in my opinion. Would you mind sharing some of that testosterone with me, I can give you some estrogen.

 

[Rebis]

I got my haircut recently, missing my old hair:

Long vs short what'd'ya say? (I'm biased with the long hair)

short hair in my opinion. Would you mind sharing some of that testosterone with me, I can give you some estrogen.

Try no fap, it increases testosterone levels. Don't deter from the females though.

 

[peoplesuck]

I got my haircut recently, missing my old hair:

Long vs short what'd'ya say? (I'm biased with the long hair)

short hair in my opinion. Would you mind sharing some of that testosterone with me, I can give you some estrogen.

Try no fap, it increases testosterone levels. Don't deter from the females though.

From what I saw it is only a small increase, with some larger short term spikes.
Im not sure my body could actually handle more test, I like not having chest hair or back hair.
we have a similar build, actually, my face is just more feminine.

 

[Rebis]

I got my haircut recently, missing my old hair:

Long vs short what'd'ya say? (I'm biased with the long hair)

short hair in my opinion. Would you mind sharing some of that testosterone with me, I can give you some estrogen.

Try no fap, it increases testosterone levels. Don't deter from the females though.

From what I saw it is only a small increase, with some larger short term spikes.
Im not sure my body could actually handle more test, I like not having chest hair or back hair.

Body hair is lame, I was shaving my chest for a while but gave up. Looking to get a new razor

 

[peoplesuck]

I actually have less hair than women naturally do, Im really not even sure how that works. my arms are almost bare, my legs are the only hairy part on me, and its not thick, kinda fine like the hair on your head.

would explain a lot if I were one of those xxy types.
this whole talk has reminded me how important it is that I stay out of prison, thanks.

 

[Rebis]

Oh god, if I was in prison it'd kill me.

I'd kill myself, am I fuck eating prison food and being surrounded by these people. I wouldn't care about them personally but just the anger, depression, frustration bubble would be the worst.

 

[peoplesuck]

Yes but in some ways it would be a chance to kill evil people, who if they ever got out, would do terrible things. Im not sure if I completely agree with that statement, some people can be rehabilitated, some people it isnt worth the risk. Old me would be down for murdering the evil doers, Im smart enough and strangely a good enough actor I know I could. Now im not so sure, life is complex and so are people. Lets both be thankful we arent in prison.
I bet there is a long thread about the death penalty, I should check it out.

 

[peoplesuck]

When you start deciding who lives and who dies, that might be when you have lost your wits, Im going to keep that attitude in check.

I wonder, does power really corrupt, or does it simply show your true nature? Is it maybe seeing yourself as the one whom decides, not necessarily the one with the power, but the dominance.

 

[Rebis]

Power corrupts as control is not something we are used to.

I just accessed my visual spatial sketchpad watching my finfer, i started to imagine a face, it generated floating around my body and then morphed into e faces, then 12 smaller ones with demonic mouths

Sleep is fun @moody

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

 

[peoplesuck]

Its funny that before I took biology and anatomy/physiology I thought the body was cool, now that I know more about how it actually works it seems like magic.

 

[moody]

Power corrupts as control is not something we are used to.

I just accessed my visual spatial sketchpad watching my finfer, i started to imagine a face, it generated floating around my body and then morphed into e faces, then 12 smaller ones with demonic mouths

Sleep is fun @moody

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

Like I said, mine are usually of the kinesthetic and auditory nature, so the most specific thing I’ve seen is a giant scorpion spider (called the wind spider, they’re real) trying to bite me, and even when I jumped out of my bed and ran out the door, I still saw it. After a minute of it flashing in and out of existence, I got annoyed and thought “dammit it got me again!” My poor roomate...

I’ve also seen other less specific things. In general I try to keep all the colors in my room neutral, so that when I sleep, my brain doesn’t have anything other than black to work with. Decreases chance of visual hallucinations.

I used to have a colorful art print, but it had too many colors. When I’d try to go to sleep, my brain would shape them into all kinds or ugly/frightening things. I have no idea why, I don’t watch a lot of horror, I’m not horribly pessimistic, my psyche is just a little shit that wants to mess with me at every opportunity. Can’t blame it, it’s what I’ve done with othe people. Time to take what I dished out... (Sigh)

 

[peoplesuck]

When you try to snap them out of it, something like this happens:

I missed this, how funny and accurate. was that from a movie?

@peoplesuck Safety razors are da shit, but I rarely use them dry. Usually I just trim my beard with a machine. How much of a "trap" can you be, if you dry shave with a straight razor? I'm pretty sure I saw crocodile dundee do that, once.

The trap thing started as a joke because I kept being mistaken for a woman. I have a sort of manly chin, I actually have a 15" bowie knife.
Im not sure if I actually look like a trap with short hair, my long hair covered my jaw, making me look very feminine, I found myself more attractive like that.
If you are curious ask @Inexorable Username she knows what I look like, I dont really wanna share too many pictures of myself considering how much I have shared.

 

[peoplesuck]

Power corrupts as control is not something we are used to.

I just accessed my visual spatial sketchpad watching my finfer, i started to imagine a face, it generated floating around my body and then morphed into e faces, then 12 smaller ones with demonic mouths

Sleep is fun @moody

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

Like I said, mine are usually of the kinesthetic and auditory nature, so the most specific thing I’ve seen is a giant scorpion spider (called the wind spider, they’re real) trying to bite me, and even when I jumped out of my bed and ran out the door, I still saw it. After a minute of it flashing in and out of existence, I got annoyed and thought “dammit it got me again!” My poor roomate...

I’ve also seen other less specific things. In general I try to keep all the colors in my room neutral, so that when I sleep, my brain doesn’t have anything other than black to work with. Decreases chance of visual hallucinations.

I used to have a colorful art print, but it had too many colors. When I’d try to go to sleep, my brain would shape them into all kinds or ugly/frightening things. I have no idea why, I don’t watch a lot of horror, I’m not horribly pessimistic, my psyche is just a little shit that wants to mess with me at every opportunity. Can’t blame it, it’s what I’ve done with othe people. Time to take what I dished out... (Sigh)

hallucinations are typically dopamine related, have you tried any mood stabilizers? may work

 

[moody]

I wonder, does power really corrupt, or does it simply show your true nature? Is it maybe seeing yourself as the one whom decides, not necessarily the one with the power, but the dominance.

There is no such thing as a true self with this perspective. It it ethical to go around and blame people for things they never did, just because you know they’d react unethically in a rhetorical situation?

As Jung puts it, we are constantly unfolding into our “true selves” the more situations we’re put in. We’re always changing, and don’t reach a final destiny of growth. When we cease to change, your brain realizes they is id not needed anymore, and your cognitive functions atrophy. To be every unfolding is to be alive.

There’s no way to account for your self-worth based on endless “what-if” scenarios, as the same goes when judging others. This doesn’t mean all are excluded from blame, only that no one is bad until they’ve done things to make their actions bad. Same goes with doing good,

 

[moody]

I missed this, how funny and accurate. was that from a movie?

Yes, but the movie is an adaptation of the proadway musical. It’s called The Producers. If you like that, I highly recommend the movie. It’s hilarious.

hallucinations are typically dopamine related, have you tried any mood stabilizers? may work

It’s complicated. These are symptoms of an autoimmune disorder , treatment is a work in progress

 

[peoplesuck]

I wonder, does power really corrupt, or does it simply show your true nature? Is it maybe seeing yourself as the one whom decides, not necessarily the one with the power, but the dominance.

There is no such thing as a true self with this perspective. It it ethical to go around and blame people for things they never did, just because you know they’d react unethically in a rhetorical situation?

As Jung puts it, we are constantly unfolding into our “true selves” the more situations we’re put in. We’re always changing, and don’t reach a final destiny of growth. When we cease to change, your brain realizes they is id not needed anymore, and your cognitive functions atrophy. To be every unfolding is to be alive.

There’s no way to account for your self-worth based on endless “what-if” scenarios, as the same goes when judging others. This doesn’t mean all are excluded from blame, only that no one is bad until they’ve done things to make their actions bad. Same goes with doing good,

Is there a universal end point? Im not familiar with this. Do we all follow a rough sequence of views?

 

[peoplesuck]

I missed this, how funny and accurate. was that from a movie?

Yes, but the movie is an adaptation of the proadway musical. It’s called The Producers. If you like that, I highly recommend the movie. It’s hilarious.

hallucinations are typically dopamine related, have you tried any mood stabilizers? may work

It’s complicated. These are symptoms of an autoimmune disorder , treatment is a work in progress

What is the name of your disorder?
Edit: I saw a documentary about people suffering from these hallucinations, being strangled and beaten every night, at the time there was no explanation, so im very curious.

 

[peoplesuck]

When I was younger I got horrible auditory hallucinations and tactile ones, where my hands felt like they were being cut to pieces by wires, every once in a while those sensations come back, I kind of have ptsd from it.
Also something odd, one night I woke up from a nightmare, and the only way I could explain it would be, my brain hadn't woken up completely, I was terrified. There wasn't anything to be terrified of, I was just in a state of pure panic for seemingly no reason.