Lazy, Drunk, Drugs, Depression. INTP experiences from this forum

[Beat Mango]

Hmmm...I agree only in that depression is exclusionary as well. I think that they both have their issues.

I actually don't have anything against optimism when it's genuine and based upon real possibilities... (but then again if it was based on real possibilities then it would be realism - no wonder I like it). What I really dislike is a consciously chosen bias towards optimism. People do this all the time - they take arms against their own demons, and in doing so take arms against anyone who reflects their own dark side (shadow). So what you get is scapegoats, which I find I am often one of them. In fact just last night my brother had a massive go at me, out of nowhere, for being a bad influence for the same sort of reason - wickedness, negativity, etc. I don't even care anymore - if people want to cast their shadow on me, it's all bollocks, but I can take it.

 

[Agent Intellect]

I don't know about depressed (maybe dysthymia) - I have depression that goes in and out (lasts 3-5 days and goes away). What I would describe myself as, and a lot of people around here, is disillusioned. I think a lot of people around here are not as apt to lie to themselves that the world can sometimes be a shitty place to live, but it doesn't make us depressed to be somewhere in the spectrum of anywhere from realist to cynical to jaded.

I would also point out that, yes, some people on this forum might be depressed (and there are probably a few who just think that being dark and brooding make them seem deep and interesting so they put that on as a persona) but this forum has also been beneficial to a lot of people. I myself can probably attribute some of the positive changes I've made to self realizations catalyzed by my discussions on this forum - namely going back to school after six and a half years of being a self pitying bum and getting sober from crippling alcoholism.

 

[LAM]

I don't know about depressed (maybe dysthymia) - I have depression that goes in and out (lasts 3-5 days and goes away). What I would describe myself as, and a lot of people around here, is disillusioned. I think a lot of people around here are not as apt to lie to themselves that the world can sometimes be a shitty place to live, but it doesn't make us depressed to be somewhere in the spectrum of anywhere from realist to cynical to jaded.

I would also point out that, yes, some people on this forum might be depressed (and there are probably a few who just think that being dark and brooding make them seem deep and interesting so they put that on as a persona) but this forum has also been beneficial to a lot of people. I myself can probably attribute some of the positive changes I've made to self realizations catalyzed by my discussions on this forum - namely going back to school after six and a half years of being a self pitying bum and getting sober from crippling alcoholism.

Yeah, I am becoming a much better person from sticking on this forum and also learning more about INTPs. Perhaps I went on this forums to learn more about what I am and how to fix my weaknesses. And thats what I am doing

 

[LAM]

I actually don't have anything against optimism when it's genuine and based upon real possibilities... (but then again if it was based on real possibilities then it would be realism - no wonder I like it). What I really dislike is a consciously chosen bias towards optimism. People do this all the time - they take arms against their own demons, and in doing so take arms against anyone who reflects their own dark side (shadow). So what you get is scapegoats, which I find I am often one of them. In fact just last night my brother had a massive go at me, out of nowhere, for being a bad influence for the same sort of reason - wickedness, negativity, etc. I don't even care anymore - if people want to cast their shadow on me, it's all bollocks, but I can take it.

I think my optimism is either based on real well thought out possibilities, or that I know that there is a possibility to find well thought out possibilities. Except I haven't found them yet. That doesn't mean that they don't exist. I think the saying "nothing is ever impossible" to be quite true. Admittedly I may never be able to achieve something, but I know that if I don't, then someone else will. With the help of my attempts or not.

 

[White Rabbit]

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

ha.

fun tiemz.

 

[lightspeed]

I am high as fuck right now on opiods and caffiene.

 

[CortLeaf]

I think this forum attracts a specific type of INTP. What that type/ those types are I don't know and I can't bothered to find out either. I think this is because of the almost overwhelming number of people on here who share the same INTP problems. I really don't believe most young INTPs are drunkards/crackheads/depressed/ lazy underachievers in a lot of things. Also apathetic. I feel like the exception for being energetic, optimistic, etc. This doesn't mean I don't get a bit sad sometimes or that I am not socially awkward...

Note: this next sentence is merely a crap discussion point that is badly expressed; Anybody else on here who wasn't depressed, drunk, etc when they were young. And why/how were you happier than most on these forums?</p>

Personality theory and online forums for such attract the mentally unstable. God, the INFP forums are worse!!! Almost everyone is suicidal, you know.

 

[Lobstrich]

I think this forum attracts a specific type of INTP. What that type/ those types are I don't know and I can't bothered to find out either. I think this is because of the almost overwhelming number of people on here who share the same INTP problems. I really don't believe most young INTPs are drunkards/crackheads/depressed/ lazy underachievers in a lot of things. Also apathetic. I feel like the exception for being energetic, optimistic, etc. This doesn't mean I don't get a bit sad sometimes or that I am not socially awkward...

Note: this next sentence is merely a crap discussion point that is badly expressed; Anybody else on here who wasn't depressed, drunk, etc when they were young. And why/how were you happier than most on these forums?</p>

If I understood what you just said
(I understood it as "You guys all seem like either potheads or just lazy depressed people, and I feel like an energetic exception.. If that's not the case though, simply ignore this whole rant, )
You are an idiot. Sorry.. But claiming a whole forum is full of potheads, underachievers and people who live in their parents basements, and that you are the only exception. Is just fucking dumb..


My dad was heroin addict, he's tried to strangle my mother.
(She was one of those organic-hippie. As in a happy-pothead)
he had me wait in the car for 6 hours, because he had a fucking needle in his arm, and to waste time I tried to find all the needles in the car.
I had absolutely no friends in school, didn't get my first girlfriend until I was like fucking 15 years old. And I had never had a god damn depression.
I myself despise drugs. I think it's idiotic and people that keep doing drugs should be left in the mud. I think smoking a little joint now and then is fine . I don't do it myself though.

I'm halfway though my education as cook.
I don't do it for the money, I do it for the passion.
If the place I'm working at had told me "Sure you can get in here, but we wont be able to pay you" I would have say yes anyway.
Because it's the best place. And being a cook requires alot of energy.
Being a good colleague in a kitchen requires you to have alot of energy.
You meet up between 8 and 11 AM and you go home between 9-12PM And you most like will be working 12 hours a day 5-6 days a week.
And you still need to be happy, joke around, sing, call out orders. Or clean potatoes for 6 hours straight.
And then you get 45 minutes break.
A 15 minute for lunch, and a 30 minute for dinner.
It does depend on how busy it is though.
(at the place I'm at, at least. And it's like that most places)

Also, I don't drink at all. I want to be able to "Drink a couple of pints with some mates" But I can't at this point because I don't like the taste of Beer, or wine or any alchohol for that matter.. But I want to be able to drink. I just don't see the point in getting drunk just to get drunk. I'd drink beer, wine with a dinner, or at the park, beach whatever. I dont smoke either. Never have, never will.

So before you call me, or anyone else a depressed pothead with no future.
Please! For christ sake, don't start a topic saying
"You all seem lazy, I'm an exception" How about a topic saying
"What is your activities/occupations/hobbies?"
Or whatever the fuck you feel like.
And I know you were probably just wondering, but don't assume what you wonder is true. And then taking the stance you did from the beginning!
Maybe I'm overreacting, yes. But I felt insulted! =O

EDIT: Also, I'm not saying that I'm just like you. Or not lazy at all etc. but your ignorance and stupidity was what pissed me off.

 

[echoplex]

Lazy: It's either all or nothing. Either I can't do anything or I'm trying to do everything. I don't recommend either mindset.

Drunk: Quite rarely.

Drugs: None besides caffeine. Most drugs seem unappealing, but I can't say I'm averse to the idea in general. I *do not* want to be an addict though. I doubt anyone does.

Depression: I don't think it's fair to say I've been depressed. Compared to those with real clinical depression, any issues I've had -- be they with emotions, lack of motivation, social awkwardness, etc. -- are something that pale in comparison. I have had, and continue to have, difficulties with my own mind, but I mostly ascribe them to simply not (yet) finding the right fit and putting it all together, and not to depression. It's going to take alot of time and effort to no longer be tempted to label myself as depressed at times, but I know intellectually that I'm not.

 

[lightspeed]

I am high as fuck right now on opiods and caffiene.

You guys really have no idea how high I was that night. I was running up the walls.

 

[Wish]

You guys really have no idea how high I was that night. I was running up the walls.

Then falling down? Or did you run up onto the ceiling and to the other side?

 

[Il Nessuno]

Lazy: Very.

Drunk: I'd probably drink a lot more if I was legal. In college, I usually drank at least once or twice a week. I don't get too smashed though. I've been trying to watch it lately so I've switched from vodka and mixers to beer.

Drugs: I'd do a lot of drugs if I had contacts here. Pot and psychedelics interest me. I did quite a bit of drugs my freshman year.

Depression: I'm kind of depressed right now actually. Seems to go into cycles just because I'm trying to figure out what I want to do in life, dealing with my laziness, and my anxiety. So I've been kind of stressed out. Drugs and alcohol probably don't help but *shrugs*

 

[Lobstrich]

Lazy: Very.

Drunk: I'd probably drink a lot more if I was legal. In college, I usually drank at least once or twice a week. I don't get too smashed though. I've been trying to watch it lately so I've switched from vodka and mixers to beer.

Drugs: I'd do a lot of drugs if I had contacts here. Pot and psychedelics interest me. I did quite a bit of drugs my freshman year.

Depression: I'm kind of depressed right now actually. Seems to go into cycles just because I'm trying to figure out what I want to do in life, dealing with my laziness, and my anxiety. So I've been kind of stressed out. Drugs and alcohol probably don't help but *shrugs*

Get a job instead of doing idiotic drugs.

 

[pjoa09]

Drugs: did a bong( tried my best getting high even drank champagne immediately after and no effect) and cig, couldn't understand the fascination. Caffeine is what keeps me alive. I drink coke like hell and coffee like the trenches in hell. Even as a boy addicted to chocolate. Think if I don't stop I'd kill myself but oh well.
Alcohol: Drink till tipsy every weekend with freinds. Worst night was 3 long islands in 15 minutes. Puked 3 times, once in the clubs toilet, once in the taxi, once in my freinds toilet before passing out. Didn't know how I ended up on a bed, I seriously value my freinds for that. First hangover ever. I never do normally even after puking.
Laziness: extremely. Sometimes I work very hard to avoid work itself. Used to try to program functions on my computer for my math homework. See it's not so bad to be lazy. Just be in excess.
Inteferes with work but so long as I remind myself there's something to do I am ok.

 

[shadowdrums4]

I'm glad I read the thread first because at first glance I was insulted. Let's see if I can organize what I want to say.

Lazy:I read somewhere that the western definition of lazy is actually introversion. I get tired if I'm around people too long. I don't do "busywork" or homework if I don't need the practice. I realized that I'm actually not that lazy when I went into band. I work hard as hell trying to figure out my parts. I'm up early every tuesday and thursday going in to work on my music. I've never missed an assignment in music theory, in fact that class and percussion class energize me. The problem is I can't generate that energy everywhere. I appear lazy because I don't do anything that I deem useless to me. I think that's the problem with a lot of people. They seem to think their mindset is right and therefore get angry at anyone who has a different one. I am kind of seeing this theme throughout the thread.

Drunk: I wouldn't call myself a drunk. I do drink when it is available to me, but I rarely get truly drunk. I have been and didn't like the feeling. I'm the kind of drunk who just throws out the emotions I hide and end up looking sappy and stupid. (I once sent a message to a friend at 3 am asking her why she stays by me because I'm a fuck up. The first sentence was "Okay you were probably pretty drunk when you wrote this but....*answers questions I put in*") I don't like just spilling my emotions like that because I don't like people to think I'm weak in any way so I hide everything. (Not something I recommend)
That being said, I know a lot of drunks around here. My little brother for example. He and his friends drink whenever possible. I have an optimistic friend constantly trying to convince me to stop him but I can't. The reason I can't is because I know how my brother feels. I understand WHY he drinks so much. People who are completely against drugs usually don't have any understanding of this and thus judging happens. My brother is 16, tried a bunch of drugs and got drunk last night. I saw the solution "Get a job don't do stupid drugs. This was really disregarding. My brother has been trying to get a job and no place will hire him. He's watching our family drop and feels useless to stop it. He uses that alcohol as an escape. Who can blame him? Who can say he's wrong? I'm not advocating drug use but I am saying judging him is wrong. Honestly, if it weren't for my asthma, I'd probably try some of the things he does. When things are happening and you're powerless to stop it, you want an escape. Ugh, I don't know how to put what I'm trying to say.
Depression: I have clinical depression guys. The problem with depression is that people seem to think it's just a deeper degree of sadness, and if you don't have it, it's really difficult to understand it. It's not even really an outlook. Some days you are so debilitated by everything that nothing seems worth it. All you want is out. Some days it's not bad at all. Some days something happens that leads you to think back to a depressed state. My diagnosing episode went something like this: I was up laying in my room, thinking about everything that was happening. Suddenly I came to a "realization" (which turned out to not be at all) that my close friends didn't and wouldn't need me for much longer. This led to wondering "If they don't need me, would they still stand by me" and even a friend that had for 10 years, I believed wouldn't. I didn't believe any friend I had would stand by me past necessity. This scared me, it upset me. I continued to lay around wondering how long it would be before they left. I imagined every friend I had coming to me and saying "Shadow thank you for everything. I can take care of myself now. I don't need you. Goodbye" and walking away. "I still need you though" I thought. In my mind, that illusion became real. "I'm not useful to anyone. Everyone is better off without me" and I found my pocket knife and sliced my stomach. As I was starting to bleed "It's better this way" was all I could think. I thought everyone was gone. Suddenly I got a text from a friend, she was just checking on me. "Oh no, I don't want her to think this is her fault" I told her what was happening and argued how useless I was and that I just make everything worse. Obviously I survived but I really scared most of my friends. They had no idea. Then a few days later I was thinking about everything, I was so guilty about what I had done. Everything led back to something terrible, and I felt trapped because I didn't want to hurt them again but I still thought they'd be better off if I died..... Then everything stopped. I think it's called "shutting down" Normally I'm always thinking, but this time nothing. I laid around for hours doing absolutely nothing. I felt like I was floating, I didn't exist, I wasn't really there. Then suddenly a "subject word" of sorts would come up and all my thoughts on it would bombard my brain so quick I couldn't decipher anything. Then nothing again. It was the scariest thing that ever happened to me.
I still have bouts of depression but most people never know. I hide it, and try to look on the bright side. When it gets me, I go to friends immediately now to kill off whatever it is. It wasn't until talking with a friend's mom that I learned that what had happened was not a normal thing. It was not a normal reaction and it was not a phase. It was a disorder that needed treatment. So yes I was very offended by the comment that it was romanticized and self-indulgent. I was angry that it was put with things like drugs that are a choice (at least a first.) I'm glad it was clarified as an observation.
There was this ignorant kid in my class who tried to claim that depression was not real. "You have it because you've been told you have it." I was extremely offended especially when he stuck by that claim. I figured out an answer for him a few days later. "No if I was never told I had it, my thoughts would have eaten me alive. I know it's a disorder now, so I am learning to recognize that certain reactions aren't actually the right ones. I'm starting to recognize when I'm starting to spiral back and more easily prevent it."

The depression thing is really what I wanted to say and I hope it doesn't come off unclear/differently than I intended. Conclusion: I'm not offended by the OP as much as different things that have been thrown out. I was also attempting to clarify what depression actually looks like.

 

[NeverAmI]

I find it enjoyable to be lazy, drunk, and on drugs. I am clinically depressed and on anti-depressants.

I try not to be any of those, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

 

[Sparrow]

Drunk: Wine - Sometimes.

Lazy: Laziest person I know.

Drugs: Never done.

Depression: Can't remember when I haven't been depressed.

 

[Il Nessuno]

Get a job instead

Easier said than done.

idiotic drugs.

Well, that's like, just your opinion, man.

 

[bananaphallus]

Drunk - Very rarely, don't really like alcohol/being drunk
Drugs - Marijuana occasionally for four months when 17/18, none since
Depression - Diagnosed as 'moderate depressive', some therapy, refuse to take ADs, they can all go to hell, I'll burn this place down, not convinced I'm actually depressed
Lazy - More a consequence of circumstances than something intrinsic, although I guess if I genuinely wasn't a lazy person I'd do something about this. Hmm. In conclusion, yes...it's not something I'm proud of/I think a tendency to be easily dissuaded would be more accurate, being overwhelmed by the perceived/conjured-up challenges/quandaries of any given endeavor/future - working on this

 

[NeverAmI]

namely going back to school after six and a half years of being a self pitying bum and getting sober from crippling alcoholism.

Good to hear man! I have had to deal with alcoholism too. School sucks, make it your bitch.

 

[Shauni]

Depression isn't generally the fault of the person who has it, they don't 'choose' to be depressed. I suffer from it and yet eat healthily, exercise and try and stay positive, but with mental disorders it's difficult to be optimistic, especially in stressful parts of life. The other factors are usually linked to disorders, such as depression, and would take alot of money and mental healthcare to deal with. Not everyone is privileged enough to have the time and money to go to therapy.

I agree with this completely. No one "chooses" to be depressed, and for the most part, people actually try to get out of it. I dislike the assumptions that people just "like to be depressed" or "find ways in which they can be depressed." Usually, I hear this from people who have never suffered from depression, or they're just so detached from their own feelings that they try to rationalize other people's experiences. I've been guilty of doing the second.

But if someone opens themselves up as depressed, they're not necessarily doing it to hear your critiques or your own point-of-view. I think their doing it in order to establish some sort of understanding with people, not to gain "pity." People's experiences are different, and depression certainly isn't a black-and-white thing. Unless you have the powers of telepathy, you really can't say why people suffer from depression. You can try to make judgments, but they can be inaccurate. When someone tells you they're depressed, don't try to completely dismiss their feelings or condition. They're opening up to you for a reason.

I think that depression is both underdiagnosed and overdiagnosed. There are people who think they have a mental disorder when actually, they're just genuinely upset over something. Then, there are people who deny their depression when they have it. I think one of the diagnosis criteria people often overlook is that if you have a mental disorder, you have difficulty CONTROLLING your reactions and emotions. People who are simply sad about something aren't necessarily "depressed," but those who can't control their sadness to the point it completely consumes their life are. Feeling sad and down is a part of the human condition (whether us INTPs like it or not ;p). What matters is how we deal with it and how much those feelings consume us.

As far as my own insight goes with these issues:
Drugs/Alcohol-- Caffeine, of course. But I do smoke cigarettes and drink on occasion. But if I'm in a rotten mood, I try to keep alcohol away from me because I know I won't be in control of it.

Depression-- I've been diagnosed with major depression, generalized anxiety, and agoraphobia with panic. I'm getting in control of these things now. It's hard, but I'm getting there. There was a point in time where I was prescribed to a bunch of medication, and they made my condition 100 times worse. I was constantly hospitalized, and I've even lost jobs. Medication helps some people, but I just personally had adverse effects on it, and I think it wasn't fair that I was automatically prescribed to them. I'm off of them now (though my reputation is still in shambles), and though I still have problems, I know how to deal with them better. Mainly, meditation, having plenty of "alone" time, writing, and physical exercise helps me. Both genetics and hard life experiences contribute to my mental illnesses. </ extreme vagueness>

Laziness-- It depends on if I care about the task at hand. Generally, I get my requirements done, but if it's something I care about (like, say, journalism and writing), I can tear into it. If I feel personally overwhelmed, I can withdraw so that I can make myself more under control and competent. A lot of people see this and judge me for being "lazy," but that doesn't mean I've given up on the task. But if I just don't care about something, I won't do it.

When I was little, I lived in my own little world (like I do now), but I did it without fear. I was just being myself. But being made fun of in school, dealing with racism in my hometown, and dealing with abuse just completely shot whatever confidence I had. I think I was definitely an INTP when I was young, but me having to deal with others' ignorance literally nearly destroyed me. Right now, I'm trying to find a way where I can deal with other people, and I can do it without having to compromise myself. </ more extreme vagueness>

As far as the "optimism" thing goes, even at my best, people think I'm a buzz kill ;p. I'm often just pragmatic and realistic, I think. But when I'm not at my best, I can have problems with extreme pessimism, cynicism, and nihilism. But there's a difference between being a skeptic and being cynical. I'd like to think I'm just skeptical . Also, I tend to deconstruct a lot (which gets on people's nerves).

K, I'll stop rambling....now.

 

[LAM]

please, people this was resolved on page one. You are restarting the same issues again, except this time theres not so many people taking it so personally. Just read throught the thread *sighs*

 

[Unique]

Lam what do you mean resolved? this is an ongoing discussion about experiences going off the title...

Drunk - Enjoyable, but I got over it, not from what alcohol does to me but what it brings out in others, I still drink but not too fussed over it, people seem to talk it up a lot when its nothing special

Drugs - Only one that I like is ecstasy (mdma) sometimes

Depression - Mild unhappyness now and then, my mood is pretty consistent though, a lower laid back sort of energy, people say I have a calming effect, like they can talk to me about anything

Lazy - Yeah for sure

So I pretty much tick yes for everything and yet still hold down a job and am pretty damn satisfied with my life

Oh because you thought drugs, booze and lazyness meant unhappiness and depression right?

Way to throw things in baskets

 

[peu4000]

Drugs: I'll try anything once(or more), I smoke marijuana pretty regularly. I won't touch needles.

Alcohol: Can't right now because of kidney troubles. If I could, not that often.

Depression: I think my dad has some kind of depression. I may as well, but I wouldn't know.

Lazy: Hell yes. I have an important test in a few days and I haven't studied for yet.

 

[Escape Artist]

Drugs: I used to smoke pot here and there until I got kicked out at 18, at which time my use increased greatly due to getting my own place. This lasted into my early 20's. I now smoke infrequently, but due to my previous drug history, marijuana now is very hard for me to handle and sometimes induces some pretty hefty anxiety.

For a while, when I was exasperated with life and social anxiety, I turned to cocaine which I got hooked on a few times for no more than a few months each time. But that was long enough. Since my tolerance had increased, I was doing more and crashing harder, eventually leading to my first panic attack. Combined with high amounts of caffeine from pop-drinking, stimulants were wreaking havoc on my mind and nervous system and really only masked the reasons why I began to use cocaine in the first place.

I've done shrooms and acid both less than 10 times each and gained what understanding of drugs that I needed: that they are simply tools. I still enjoy both of these substances, but really only use them once per year or less due the amount of mind-preparation that is needed (read: control over situation).

I'll have also have a benzo or an opiate here or there.

As time passes, I've come to realize that I value a brain performing at full capacity and generally abstain from substances that keep me from running at top speed. Except for.....

Alcohol: which I love. I make my own wine. Alcohol is a relaxing tool that helps me clarify my thoughts and slow them down. I go through periods of drinking 1 or 2 drinks 5 days a week to drinking maybe once per week. I think it's related to seasons. When I'm stuck inside, I read more, think more, do less. Summer is a time of action for me and thus I drink less because I'm doing more than actively thinking. If I lived in a climate that had winters much longer than 4 months, I'd be a drunk.

Depression: recurring. Probably due to the fact that I'm always questioning the situation I'm in and often see no way out. I like to do what I want at all possible times, and commitment to anything is equivalent to slavery. Right now, my hatred of being in the higher education system is contributing to my bouts of depression. I do not medicate with prescription drugs, although I have briefly in the past.

Laziness: What can I say, I live according to my own sense of time. Other people's deadlines keep me in check, otherwise I be a'wandering. I only view myself as truly lazy when I am overwhelmed by all the ideas I have in my head such that I become paralyzed and the resulting inaction can pervade other areas in my life such as school and family/friends.

 

[RedLoki]

@Escape Artist My situation with pot sounds identical to yours. If you don't mind, could you elaborate on it? It was great when I first started and smoked it habitually. But once I stopped and detoxed from it, it was impossible for me to enjoy. The most extreme anxiety comes to me, I would feel like my mind is completely detached from the world around me with almost no short term memory. I wouldn't remember what friends say to me seconds after they said it because I'd be so absorbed in my mind. The last time I got high was a few months ago and my friend opened the window but I couldn't feel the cold until my friend mentioned it. I felt like I soiled myself and I actually went to the bathroom to check that I didn't. I'd try to reassure myself that I'm not awkward and strange. I've not tried LSD, but reading about it just sounds like my mind would go into an intense analytical state that I wouldn't be able to handle. @Unique or anyone with MDMA or ecstasy experience Please tell me how MDMA or ecstasy affected you! I want to try because I've heard that you can look at another person and instantly understand exactly how they're feeling in that moment and part of that experience carries along with you afterward. If that's true, it sounds like a tool that could help with better understanding people, something I'm still trying to adapt to.

 

[White Rabbit]

I changed a lot in the past couple of months (sharp twist in general perspective etc), but from my humble experience (during the past 3 years):

Lazy: Main mode of functioning. Lazy mind as well.

Drinking: I am an alcoholic, used my privileges long time ago. It's not even fun to drink anymore, it became very mechanical, so I stopped one day, cold turkey. Now all I have to do is stay sober to the rest of my life.

Drugs: I did everything, except for heroin. Developed nice anxiety from coke and mephedrone. The only reason why I didn't do heroin was because I knew that I would O.D. in couple of days, due to underlying depression (nice little attachment).

Depression: About 2 years, I don't think it was clinical, refused to get on meds. It was really something self-induced, probably out of self pity. Then I realized it was a state called "You're a fucking pussy, get up". Whatever.

Now, all I do is pot and shrooms. I focused all the energy used for self-pitying on creating, working, just letting it outside. It's funny, I realized that was an ENTP only after depression slowed down and I opened up.

 

[intuitivet]

Lazy: Not really, I work hard, but I guess I dislike doing things I don't have to do.

Drunk: Once in my life, it was okay. I'm not big on alcohol, it tastes bad and I take too long to get tipsy so it's boring.

Drugs: I accidentally got high from inhaling other people's stuff. I wouldn't choose to, but if I was offered I might just to see what it was like (the accidental experience was good, but I know better than to delve into drugs).

Depression:I'm undiagnosed but my father suffers from it and I display every textbook symptom so it's very likely. I do want to get over it and I even went to therapy for a while (but being the awkward woman I am I couldn't talk about it properly).

 

[Escape Artist]

@Escape Artist My situation with pot sounds identical to yours. If you don't mind, could you elaborate on it?

Is there something specific about my experiences with pot you would like me to elaborate on, or would you prefer something more general?

Please tell me how MDMA or ecstasy affected you!

My few experiences with MDMA have left me feeling very receptive and empathetic. It helped me to form some of my feelings for people into words and to adequately release many of the beautiful emotions that I experience with people very close to me. It was a nice communication tool and somewhat therapeutic. At a concert/show, I experienced more psychedelic effects compared to the empathic effects experienced in the small, intimate settings at mine and my friend's house. Set and setting probably plays a large role in the experience, much like psychedelics.

A normal dose (~100 mg) left me feeling incredibly drained physically and mentally the next day and I easily could have slept for 18 hours. The first time I took it, I experienced depression the following day, but after the other two times I've done it I was just exhausted.

MDMA, like many other drugs, has the potential to be used as an escape mechanism and could easily be abused.

 

[LAM]

Lam what do you mean resolved? this is an ongoing discussion about experiences going off the title...

People were getting pissed off at me because they think I implied that depression is voluntary and something like drugs, etc.

 

[vertimptote]

Drugs - Never, besides alcohol.
Depression - Almost incessantly as of late, but normally I'm reasonably well-grounded.
Drinking - Yes.
Lazy - All the time, and it gets in the way of school and work from time to time. In fact, I'm procrastinating a bit right now.

(First post on the fora, by the way. I've been observing invisibly for a while and found this topic to be very interesting.)

 

[Lobstrich]

Easier said than done.
Well, that's like, just your opinion, man.

Job: Just get one.

Drugs: You got me there.. True, hehe.

 

[Mary]

drunkards - No
crackheads - No
depressed - Occasionally
lazy underachievers - *ahem* >.>
Apathetic - Occasionally
energetic - Almost all of the time
Optimistic - I'm a realist.

 

[BigApplePi]

I think this forum attracts a specific type of INTP. What that type/ those types are I don't know and I can't bothered to find out either. I think this is because of the almost overwhelming number of people on here who share the same INTP problems. I really don't believe most young INTPs are drunkards/crackheads/depressed/ lazy underachievers in a lot of things. Also apathetic. I feel like the exception for being energetic, optimistic, etc. This doesn't mean I don't get a bit sad sometimes or that I am not socially awkward...

Note: this next sentence is merely a crap discussion point that is badly expressed; Anybody else on here who wasn't depressed, drunk, etc when they were young. And why/how were you happier than most on these forums?

I'm here to chat when I want to relax, to think and learn something when I want to learn something, and to teach something when I presume I can. I find the forum enormously educational.

Those questions are like a test to me. Can I answer them?

Lazy - Don't know what that means. I will work hard when challenged but procrastinate when I get stuck. It helps to stand back. One could call that "lazy."
Drunk - not since college. I had to try it. (I did get drunk once afterward but that's a long story -- and an interesting one.)
Drugs - I quit caffeine.
Don't like to drink as I get a headache afterward if too much. I didn't inhale.
A couple girlfriends had me try weed or pot. Fine but I found it dull. I'm not into sensual things.
Depression. I think being depressed is normal if one looses something they expected to have or obtain. I'm rarely depressed except momentarily. I was depressed long ago when I was totally alone, didn't know how to socialize and didn't know how to meet women. When I finally did I instantly snapped out of it. Before I did I thought things were hopeless. They weren't but it took time.
Optimism/Pessimism - Like some others I look for reality.
Apathetic - my wife says I'm type "A" meaning I don't stop.

 

[Fallenman]

Laziness: Like everyone else, I seem to only do what interests me, and what interests me can be completely and utterly random =].

Drunk: I'm no alcoholic but I will and do drink, and get drunk. Honestly, I only drink to be more extroverted. Courage liquid !!!!

Depression: Apparently I have "Anhedonia". This is fascinating because I didn't use to think I was depressed, but now I know I am . I smile because It is a harrowing experience to not know exactly what is wrong with you. I realized that clinical depression is certainly one thing, but what I had I didn't place as clinical depression. Now I know there are options.

Drugs: I've taken drugs initially for experimental purposes, and then to combat the apathy i had developed after having gone through 5 years of my dad having cancer (which I consider to be the worst part) and then having to lose 5 family members in that time period, father included (4 within the span of a year). I smoke cigs, they're one helluva drug. Completely addicting. I'll smoke weed occasionally but purely for social purposes.

Optimism/Pessimism: Im a realist with optimistic tendencies. I have a lot of faith in my capability to overcome things.

Apathy: Well as I said above... Check.

 

[Juno]

Lazy: Not really. I put things off until I get pissed off then nothing stops me to getting the tasks out of the way.

Drinking: Hardly. I enjoy the odd beer but I don't like the hangovers nor the feeling of being 'tipsy'

Drugs: Never.

Depression: Heavily some times. I've even thought of suicide (along the lines of..."hmm...what if...") but then realized that it is the most selfish thing a person could do...and I HATE being selfish. I've made some choices that will help me to figure out why I do the things that I do and the choices that I make each day. Thus, it has lead me to question EVERYTHING that I do. Including why I don't study whenever I am in school to the people that I spend time with (people who can't hold jobs, drug addicts, alcoholics, etc) to why I cannot talk to women ( I don't know how to make small talk, flirt, or anything of the sort. In fact, I feel ashamed and small when I talk to women. Sooo for all of that I am lonely until I can figure out some shit, then find people who have organized their life (like I am trying to do) and spend time with them.

 

[Mike72]

I really don't believe most young INTPs are drunkards/crackheads/depressed/ lazy underachievers in a lot of things

Well, you should re-think that, since I'm young and even though I don't drink and don't do drugs(which I probally won't ever do), I'm incredibly lazy and depressed sometimes... That still doesn't cause me to be an underachiever, but anyway...

LAZY: Yep! That's me. I won't go do my homework or study until the last second, just cause I don't feel like it. I try to get myself to do it, but it almost never works. That's how I wrote two seminars in one day and still got a good grade.

DEPRESSED: Not usually, but when I am, I am VERY depressed. And I don't mean the jump-out-of-a-window kind, I mean the wondering-how-to-get-yourself-optimistic kind. And since I want to get optimistic, but am pessimistic and most people I know are optimistic, they discourage my pessimism, discouraging my optimism as well. For a while I even thought I can't be optimistic and that my pessimism was my optimism in some way. I even took psychological tests about depression on the net and they mostly said I'm little-heavily depressed. And that got me even more depressed... But then something happenes and it's all gone.

So yeah... Young, lazy and depressed! Who knew? :P

 

[Mondorius]

Drugs: Never even tried anything besides alcohol.

Drinking: occasionnally. I enjoy it. Helps me let go of all the apprenhension of social situations. Getting drunk? Only about 3 times in my whole life and I'm 23. I avoid getting drunk.

Depression: been there, done that, learned from it.

Lazyness:

No really.






Ok, sometimes I don't do anything. Most of the time I do what I have to do, although it's not always done when it should. And sometimes I even go out of my way and accomplish things I didn't even have to!

 

[Keary]

Well I am depressed, lazy and will most likely become an underachiever later on in life, when it comes to things about society I am mostly apathetic unless in affects. I don't drink mostly because I am still underage, the price of alcohol and I'm not really game to experience a hangover, the same can be said for drugs.

 

[Minuend]

Lazy: I don't like that term, I find it misleading. But no, not particularly.

Drinking: I don't

Drug: Never tried

Depression: No.

I do have a light case of social anxiety which has been with me for half my life, though. But it's not really a part of me, it's just my body overreacting. My mind do not agree with such silly fears. Though, I stopped trying to be with humans because the constant anxiety, even days after socializing, is just too tiring. And I never feel lonely, so I don't really feel motivated about trying anything. It's fine the way it is.

 

[Frecnhtosd]

i smoke weed. a lot.
and i can tell you that intp+weed is a very very wierd mix.

Depression- yes, very very depressed/schizo/insomnia
but in fully accepting of it, and it's not like...a "problem".

 

[Pants]

Weed, I can't handle it. At all. Even small smokes drive me literally mad. In private it can spiral such that I introspectively kick the shit out of myself, and when it doesn't it's most often just a good wank then bed.

Socially, I can't engage anyone while I'm baked. I wander off on long mental tangents that don't lend themselves well to words. When I do speak I wander off on long verbal tangents that don't lend themselves well to conversation.

Woe that weed is the primary social drug. Why can't it be... anything except weed?

Drugs - Not until I was 17. A few years of heavy 'experimentation', now I'm mostly losing interest. I still enjoy a good drink, though.
Lazy - More like unfocused.
Depression - Apathy and anhedonia are things that I'm familiar with. I was depressed occasionally in my teens but after revoking my license for self-pity/indulgence it seems less an issue.

 

[Cogwulf]

Happy people don't complain...
...therefore happy people don't get noticed.


This is true across the whole internet not just places frequented by INTPs, if you look on just about any blog or any forum, in posts where people are talking about themselves, the majority are about their 'problems' or about bad things that have happened to them. People rarely start threads or write a new blog to tell people that they are happy and that their lives are perfectly normal.

Another example and sort of metaphor is customer product reviews. For a particular product perhaps 2 out of 5 reviews say that the product was faulty, but only 1 in a hundred of the product sold was faulty.


Summary: you never get a proportionate sample if you let the sample choose itself.



And back onto the gist of the thread

Laziness: I procrastinate but I'm not lazy, I find it difficult to start something, but when I get into a job I often go for hours without eating or drinking and don't notice I'm hungry.

Drinking: I don't drink a lot or particularly often.

Drugs: The only reason I have never done drugs is because I'm a coward, I'm scared of both the consequences of getting caught and of the possible side-effects. And also unless I could buy them over the internet or from a close friend I would never be able to approach someone to buy them thanks to avoidant personality disorder.
I want to experience hallucinations out of curiosity, and from time to time I feel the need for escapism of some sort or another and drugs would work better than computer games.

Depression: I've been there, and back, then there again. I've never really had full on deep depression. I've always been able to function during it, but using your energy just to keep living means there's very little energy left to lift you out of the depression. I hate it when people say things like "cheer up". If it could just be turned on and off like that depression wouldn't exist.