Feeling sorry and feeling guilty

[Oprale]

What's the difference ?

I heard a conversation on tv where a boy said " I'm sorry " and a girl answered " You're not feeling sorry, you're feeling guilty, it's different ".

Isn't it normal to feel both when one made a mistake ?

 

[Ex-User (5841)]

Yeah, it's normal to feel both.

The first thing that comes to mind is that you feel guilty when you know something is wrong ahead of time and sorry when you figure it out afterward. This could also be adjusted for the same act, i.e. you felt guilt ahead of time because you knew it was wrong, but you did it anyway, and now you're sorry.

Then again I could just have a crappy conception of these particular emotions.

 

[Black Rose]

sorry is when you did something bad but did not mean to.
guilty is thinking you're a bad person because you did something bad.
shame is feeling rejected by a peer group.

 

[TheManBeyond]

I think it might be the same thing. You say i'm sorry to ask for forgiveness, since you might have done something bad. This could be true or not but the situation kinda requires it. If not then you might be feeling guilty thus asking for redemption you are sorry.
So guilty might be caused for interpretating that you are responsable for the feelings of others but that doesn't always mean you did something wrong.
Perhaps to feel sorry is understood as a Fe thing, since it is like understanding the situation needs some kind of emotional understanding while Fi guilt is more like attacking yourself for doing something that can't be accurately judged.
Or something, i dunno.

 

[Yellow]

It sounds like this dialogue was meant as one of those moments where girls are supposed to say things that are inscrutable to boys. It's the girls-are-too-needy/boys-are-insensitive trope.

IRL remorse can be expressed with the words "I feel guilty" and "I feel sorry". Pity can be expressed with "I feel sorry" too, so I assume context would separate the meanings.

The only differentiation in the remorse category that I can think of, is "I feel guilty" could be more strongly attributed to "I wish I wasn't to blame for x" as opposed to "I feel sorry", which could be better attributed to "I wish I hadn't caused x to happen". Really though, I think I'm stretching it beyond reasonable analysis.

 

[Grayman]

Guilt is the anxiety over your ego being debased by your own actions. Feeling sorry is wanting and being willing to change it.

It is bad to be so focused on guilt that you never move past it. It is much better to be sorry.

 

[Cheeseumpuffs]

It sounds like this dialogue was meant as one of those moments where girls are supposed to say things that are inscrutable to boys. It's the girls-are-too-needy/boys-are-insensitive trope.

Yeah, it kind of comes off to me like the writer probably was having trouble figuring out how to get the characters to keep arguing and just threw in some gibberish wordplay to keep the dialogue moving.

That said, I think the implication is that "guilty" is selfish and "sorry" is selfless. If someone does something out of guilt they're trying to make themselves feel better but if they do it because they're sorry they're trying to fix things for someone else. It's kind of just semantics, imo.

 

[Jennywocky]

That said, I think the implication is that "guilty" is selfish and "sorry" is selfless. If someone does something out of guilt they're trying to make themselves feel better but if they do it because they're sorry their trying to fix things for someone else. It's kind of just semantics, imo.

Similar to what you said:

Guilty = Trying to assuage their own negative feelings about themselves over doing something labeled as "bad" = self focused

Sorry = Feeling empathy with someone who was hurt by their actions and wishing they hadn't hurt them = other focused

I think the two words reveal different intents.
But some people use them interchangeably.

 

[YOLOisonlyprinciple]

You see a homeless guy who died in a road accident

-If you are just walking by, You feel sorry for him.

-But if you were the one to run over him yesterday, you'd feel guilty

 

[Oprale]

Yees I have a better idea of their differences now

Feeling guilty would be more like feeling bad for having done something that could make others judge us.

You hurted x, you are a bad person.
'' Fuck, now people will be mad at me. I'm not as good as I'm supposed to be. I have to do something '' .

Therefore the person says she's sorry to correct the situation and make herself look good again, even if she feels more guilty than she feels sorry.

Feeling sorry would be like Aaaaaw, I hurted x. X must feel so bad. I have to do something so that x is good again.

But it's very close to guilt ain't it. Meant that way, I think you can feel guilty without feeling sorry, but you can't feel sorry without feeling guilty. Didn't want to hurt x and feeling bad for it but also feeling bad/guilty because x and some others might be mad.

Then there is the other use of the word sorry, wich is empathy. Feeling sad for the pain of others when we aren't to blame for it in any way or when the event happened so long ago that it doesn't bring strong emotions of guilt anymore.