INTP and INFP?

[QuestiontheStupid]

My bestfriend is an INFP,hes amazing. But lately there has been a little "romance" going on...but honestly im afraid of ruining our friendship.Are INTPs and INFPs good togeather?

 

[Reverse Transcriptase]

There are specific hurdles: You're introverted thinking, he's introverted feeling... that's likely to cause misunderstandings, because you'll be doing thinking and he'll be doing feeling- and both of you will be keeping it to yourself. The key is to share a lot, much more than you usually would with friends.

But besides that, there's not much to worry about. We're pretty compatiable.

I <3 INFP girls. They are wonderful mysterious creatures...

 

[Decaf]

My favorite relative is my INFP cousin. When I was 5 I told my mom I wanted to marry her. That of course prompted a bit of worldly education.

I think INFPs are excellent matches for INTPs. They can energize each other in their creative pursuits without feeling outpaced or uncomfortable. They have different perspectives (Ti vs. Fi) that prevent each other from going down the wrong path. This is not an area that I've spent an enormous amount of time studying, but I believe INTPs and INFPs are one of the better matches we can make.

 

[Ogion]

(One unimportant question civilianjones: What's that symbol of yours supposed to represent? The <3 one...)

 

[Reverse Transcriptase]

(<3 means 'love'. I love INFP girls.)

 

[Auburn]

I second that!

If I may, can I share with you my own experience with an INFP friend?

 

[Vrecknidj]

I'm an INTP, my wife is an INFP. Our 20th anniversary is in a few weeks. So, it's possible.

One of the biggest issues for me has been to separate my needs from her needs. An INFP is first and foremost an NF. So, her focus tends to be on harmony and relationship. This means that sometimes there are things she needs to hear that I don't need to say. So, I say them anyway, because it's what she needs to hear. This isn't what INTPs prefer--we have a tendency to avoid repeating ourselves, to abhor redundancy, etc. But, that's not what it's about.

There are all kinds of little things like this that simply take time to work out. So long as the committment is there, it all takes care of itself.

Dave

 

[Fedayeen]

(One unimportant question civilianjones: What's that symbol of yours supposed to represent? The <3 one...)

It's supposed to look like a heart

 

[Reverse Transcriptase]

Jung was an INTP, and wasn't his wife Emma Jung an INFP? Granted, he did have affairs with two other women. I'd like to know their types too.

 

[ngannacvy]

I'm an INFP and I just wanted to say INTP are Awesome, my best friend is an INTP, and I love the way They think.

with my friend and I, when a problem/ situation arises, we usually always arrive at the same conclusion in the end to solve the problem, but we have totally different ways of approaching the problem/situation. It’s like if a teacher was to ask what’s 2+2 we would both arrive at the conclusion of “4” but we have totally different ways of doing it. And it’s fun to look over our shoulders to the other's paper to see how they did it, because I know theirs is always way different from mines, seeing how my friend figures things out, sometimes opens a window of possibility that I did not know was even possible before, like she would figure it all out in her head where as I would pull out a packet of M&M’s from my back pack and add two blue ones to two red ones and come to the realization that there’s four all together then I’d eat them, and possibly share some with my friend.

I think that INTP and INFP relationships as Friendships are great!
I think these two types just naturally get a long well together.
I havent' meet a male INTP yet so I can't say that it's great dating one but I'm assuming that If he's just like my bestfriend (personality wise) except he's a guy, then I think it'll make for a great relationship too. (FYI: I'm a Female not sure if that was important or not in better understanding of the above.)

 

[Snail]

My bestfriend is an INFP,hes amazing. But lately there has been a little "romance" going on...but honestly im afraid of ruining our friendship.Are INTPs and INFPs good togeather?

No. I don't recommend it. I am an INFP, and I was with an INTP for about six years. There was constant conflict that eventually drove me literally insane to the point where I should probably be seeing a psychiatrist right now. Be really careful not to criticize, or if you absolutely must, sugar-coat it as much as possible and don't ever make it personal. Whatever you do, maintain a harmonious environment. Don't try to turn your [boy]friend into an INTP, because there will probably be immediate, intense conflict unless he is already borderline in his T/F preference. You INTPs can be very dangerous for the psychological health of extreme INFPs, and we can be frustrating for extreme INTPs.
Here is a link that explains some of the problems you might have.
Here is another link that describes something that could happen.

 

[Kidege]

I can see the potential problems, but damn if they aren't cute. And that wasn't meant to be patronizing, no sir. I just lurked a bit in their forum. They have a thread where they talk about their flirting habits and I would totally melt if faced with that behaviour. Unfortunately, I can also say I don't really get the way they organise things. So, superficial contact? Great. Friendship? Sure, I can see it work. But more? I'd hate to hurt their feelings, and I would.

 

[king vash]

In my experience, it has depended on both the INFP and the INTP as to if the relationship would work out or not. Personally, I love INTP's and have dated several. Yes, they are tricky, but it is do-able. You really need to understand the needs of your INTP, and be flexible. You also need to be a lot more open than you normally would be. (Yes, I am an INFP). I have had friends who have been in INTP/INFP relationships that haven't worked out at all, so I've seen both sides of this issue.

 

[Thoth]

I had an INFP girlfriend for just shy of 4 years, and a number of the other girls I've been drawn to were (I believe) INFPs. It seems to work, provided you take into consideration that they go with their gut before their heads and need constant reassurance of... everything really. That you still care, that she's pretty, things like that. More patient INTPs shouldn't have a problem, but the more detached ones might have some issues.

 

[Snail]

I don't know. Maybe I'm crazy, but I'm actually considering taking back my last statement. Yes, my last relationship was hell, but I think there was more going on than just his INTP-ness. If the specific INTP were patient and offered constant reassurance, just as Thoth said, I think it would be possible for me to be happy with one. They're awfully tempting because they are so nerdy and cute, but they can be intimidating, too.

 

[del]

I've dated NFPs before and enjoyed all of them immensely. I'm a firm believer in NT-NF combos.

Just know that Fi is going to seem extremely weird compared to Ti, although in a good way. Keep an open mind and you'll be fine.

 

[Waterstiller]

My mom is INFP and we get along fine, though it has taken both of us a very long time to understand that we are incomprehensibly different in how we come to our conclusions. It helps that we both worked to understand each other's personality type and have a basic understanding in how we differ. Something that helps is to keep reminding myself to ask her how she feels about things in an effort to actually draw her feelings out. I'm not sure if it's limited to her, but she gets easily wrapped up in her emotions and loses control when things become too personal. She's usually the only person I go to when I can't figure something out. She's told me that people like me are the ones who have the ability to make her dreams a reality (conceptually feasable). And I told her that people like her are the type dream in the first place. I have a hunch that I am only capable of dreaming of electric sheep.

If communication and validation issues have been addressed, there is still one hurdle that I have trouble getting over. Can two percievers ever really get anything done? INFJ, for this reason alone, seems like the best match for me. Yet it's that same notion of them working within a closed system that puts me off for some reason; almost intimidates. INFP with INTP seems like it would be living in pure idealistic bliss if both were able to encourage and believe in eachother's artistries enough to actually provide a living.


So.. I met an INFP at a party the other night. I haven't been able to get her out of my head the past few days. She's absolutely gorgeous, stylish, extremely nice, confident.. and apparently single. It was very weird to be able to have an interesting conversation with someone I had just met; especially during a party. The only catch is that she's straight.. but I'm optimistic and she seemed to be at least interested in me in some way (trans being the exception to many rules). If anything I might have met a good friend. Wish me luck!

 

[Reverse Transcriptase]

I have a hunch that I am only capable of dreaming of electric sheep.

You are a dick!

If communication and validation issues have been addressed, there is still one hurdle that I have trouble getting over. Can two percievers ever really get anything done? INFJ, for this reason alone, seems like the best match for me. Yet it's that same notion of them working within a closed system that puts me off for some reason; almost intimidates. INFP with INTP seems like it would be living in pure idealistic bliss if both were able to encourage and believe in eachother's artistries enough to actually provide a living.

I dunno about whether two perceivers can really get anything done.

I think they can? I've been with an INFP for half a year, and we have encouraged each other to create things. So far it's only been ceramic pieces and clarinet music- but I have this drive to create things so I can show it off to her! She has the same feeling, I believe/think/hope. We are living in a small piece of idealistic bliss... and yes, often we don't get much of anything done.

Snail, I'm really happy you've thought more about your past relationship with an INTP. I also like your conclusion. I will admit there are bad cookies (I've been one from time to time), but I think the INTP-dough is still good. It's good you're not just scanning darkly.

 

[Waterstiller]

You are a dick!

K.

 

[king vash]

In my current P/P relationship I definitely feel motivated to do/create things. We bounce ideas off of each other all the time and I'm always wanting to create things and show it off to him! Especially in ceramics. He helps me get motivated to do things I wouldn't normally have a strong drive to do. And I know he feels the same way. ;-)

 

[Kuu]

Phillip!

Better to enjoy being creative but never accomplish anything, than be constantly reminded of how much of a lazy worthless failure of a person I am... *shudders from the bad memories of J types*


I had a nice relationship with an INFP. But she wasn't prepared to deal with my messed up Ti ways, so it didn't work out. It's possible with the right balance.

 

[Thread Killer]

I think other perceivers stimulate me towards doing something, but what happens if the other person really isn't into it, I go with the flow and just do what they want because I'm that sort of person.

As to INFPs, they are normally very easy for me to understand and get along with. I don't think I'd want t a long-term relationship with one or anything because of the fundamental differences in our ethical and logical world-views.

 

[Snail]

I know it's off topic, but what type was Philip K. Dick? He seems to appeal to introverted intuitives, and especially the INT_s.

 

[Decaf]

I know it's off topic, but what type was Philip K. Dick? He seems to appeal to introverted intuitives, and especially the INT_s.

"I want to write about people I love, and put them into a fictional world spun out of my own mind, not the world we actually have, because the world we actually have does not meet my standards."

hmmm... hard to say, but the above statement has me thinking INTP

 

[Snail]

Possibly, but I say things like that all the time, and I'm an INFP.