Nowhere did I say I needed it to "feel good about myself" or find my abilities lacking. I'm attacking your vague distinction between recreational and coping. Could you tell me where those two things really separate? Habitual doesn't imply dependent, and doesn't exclude recreational.
Habitual implies addiction in medical terms e.g. Habitual intoxication, habitual drug-use. I've never heard the term, "Habitual recreational drug-user."
But to avoid confusion I'll elaborate on the difference between recreational smoking, and smoking as a coping mechanism and where the distinction lies.
If you smoke it recreationally - "of or relating to the occasional use, asserted not to be addictive."
A recreational smoker doesn't have the desire to smoke for the purpose of improving their ability to function in certain areas or deal with stress. They smoke because it is enjoyable, and if they stopped smoking altogether, it wouldn't impact how they cope with stress.
Coping - a person's patterns of response to stress.
If you smoke in part because it makes you feel less stressed, you are using it as a coping mechanism. An ineffective way of dealing with stress. Doesn't solve the issue, just pushes it aside until later. Smoking to help you socialize or to help a relationship is smoking to deal with stress.
The key difference is pretty simple. Even though the recreational smoker might be less stressed when they smoke, they don't rely on the drug to reduce and cope with stress.
The why you smoke is more important than how often you smoke. While drugs alter the chemicals in the body, it is nothing compared to the mental crippling people inflict upon themselves by failing to deal with the root cause of their issues. What are you going to do, just smoke weed all the time to feel better about yourself, and hope the issue goes away in the meantime?
As for the green tea analogy, I laughed. I've never understood the, "I need my coffee" mentality that so many people seem to have. I am who I am and the thought that whether or not I had a cup of tea in the morning would impact my mental or physical capacity just makes me laugh. Seems like the biggest placebo in the world.
There are things that are, 'nice' to do but ultimately have no impact. I like to have a big breakfast when I get up. If I'm running late, I'll skip it. This has absolutely no impact on my mood or ability to think during the day, and why should it? Why should my mental, physical and emotional capacity be diminished in a noticeable way, just because I didn't get to have the breakfast I wanted?
Such a first world problem, I don't even give things like this a second thought. "Oh boy I'm hungry, I didn't get to eat my usual breakfast!"
Meanwhile kids are starving on the other side of the world and can't even get a drop of the fresh water we have on tap, and I'm worrying about whether or not I had a green tea this morning.
I can imagine the look on the kid's face after I tell him I sleep in a warm bed every night, have the luxury of as much drinking water as I please and eat 3 meals a day - that I'm irritable because I didn't get to drink my green tea this morning.
First world problems buddy, first world problems. Get over them. They mean nothing, and any thought or concern for them is just a waste.