The club of MADNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Melkor]

Simply put, this is a place to set your red rounded bricks down, bathe your purple ducks and skewer a political penguin or two once you feel a bit mad!


Madmen and ladies should gather here to discuss things which make perfect sense.

Such as:


-Why the left hand side invisible page is always on the left.


-Why the seventh variety of toffee isn't particularily good for juggling with tea.

-Why the green/blue spot on the rounded forehead of a Mr. something or other appears to float half in space and half in another reality.......


and of course

-Why is God One part Jesus, one part holy spirit and stir.

 

[NoID10ts]

wHen, fEmale, kIttEns mAsturBate, dO, tHe, claWs huRt?

 

[Agent Intellect]

why can't i feel what part of my brain i'm thinking from? is it possible for me to trick myself into feeling like i'm thinking from my arm or stomach?

 

[NoID10ts]

why can't i feel what part of my brain i'm thinking from? is it possible for me to trick myself into feeling like i'm thinking from my arm or stomach?

yes but only if you spin your left leg like a crankshaft

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

why can't i feel what part of my brain i'm thinking from? is it possible for me to trick myself into feeling like i'm thinking from my arm or stomach?

I think with my INTPness, don't you?

 

[NoID10ts]

My INTPness floats three feet in front of me and glows pink whenever it sees things it likes. It also sings "Lovin' You" and "Thriller" upon command.

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

That's odd, mine sings Boogie Tilt You Puke...Or maybe that's just what it does.

 

[NoID10ts]

I was talking to a female hair on my left knee and she told me to lather her up and shave her because bald knees are better than hairy knees.

 

[Jesin]

I was eating a Taiwan when calamari Alaska UNDERSCORE!

 

[Melkor]

No,no.

You're doing it all wrong Jesin.

we need a mental picture that is mad, not a jumble of words.
like this.


Why is that vivid umbrella appearing to levitate above that talking and very rude gravestone?

 

[Luzian]

I've always associated Cinema Strange with madness YouTube- Cinema Strange- "Aboriginal Anemia"

 

[Jesin]

No,no.

You're doing it all wrong Jesin.

we need a mental picture that is mad, not a jumble of words.

Hmm. My post was originally quite coherent. I must have accidentally left out a few words in the middle there, sorry. You'll have to fill them in yourself.

Why is that vivid umbrella appearing to levitate above that talking and very rude gravestone?

Isn't it obvious? They're discussing mollusks and swapping collectible mice.

And don't you mean "livid umbrella"?

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

Mosquitos suck our blood for insurance purposes.

 

[NoID10ts]

i met a chipmunk who said his name was bill and he slipped me twenty dollars to hook him up with one of the ladies here on the forum who shall remain nameless but who I like to call Judylicious and he mated with her and she had a bunch of squid babies for some reason so now they are married and living in montana in an old dumpster behind walmart where they occasionally eat one of their squid babies because they taste good but i think they may be getting a divorce soon because he is seeing another woman that i hooked him up with who i call bob but she isn't frrom this forum but i think she is pregnant now.

 

[NoID10ts]

..... oh and another thing, this chipmunk fucker, bill, stopped by the house the other day and bit me on the ankle and called me a son of a bitch for ever setting him up with such a psycho chick from intpforum so i told him he better get the hell off my porch or i was going to ask the bullfrog under my giant dildo stature thats in my front yard (neighbors hate it, hahaha) to rape him. he wouldnt get off my damn porch so yeah, the bullfrog raped his little chipmunk ass and he ran away, ass glowing red, and said i havent seen the last of him. the bullfrog said dont worry man i got your back.

 

[NoID10ts]

.......... so the chipmunk came back with all his salamander friends and they broke my bedroom window then the bullfrog kicked all their asses and it was awesome!

 

[Melkor]

WHAT THE HELL!?

 

[Agent Intellect]

i like coffee. coffee is brown. the browns are a football team. american football. i live in america. we all live in a yellow submarine. the Beatles were a band. i have a ball of rubber bands. my tires are made of rubber. sometimes i get tired while working. my sound isn't working. i enjoy the sound of silence. i also enjoy pancakes. pancakes are good for supper. sometimes i forget to eat supper. i often forget where my keys are. the key to healthy living is a good diet. theres a lot of meat in a lions diet. some people don't eat meat. why are we called people? i hate when i get called. i also hate Milwaukees best. i've never been to Milwaukee. i've also never been square dancing. a square has four sides. four is two times two. what time is it? depends what "it" is. i depends on caffeine in the morning. i like coffee. coffee is brown...

 

[NoID10ts]

............ yeah, i know what you mean magic pee pee fairy ...............

 

[Melkor]

Your left ventricle just told me to f**k off....

you should get that seen to.......

 

[NoID10ts]

You should hear what the right one is saying about you!

 

[Melkor]

BASTARD!


-begins punching Noddy in the chest-

 

[Ancalion]

Anyone seen any space monkeys recently? I lost mine. :\

 

[NoID10ts]

i think i saw a space monkey eating a snickers bar in the break room at nasa before i got arrested for indecent exposure

 

[LucasM]

I like coffee too.
Coffee makes me poo.
Only if I drink too much.
While cookies I do munch.
mmm
I wonder if coffee poo makes the fish crazy once it enters the water system.

 

[Anthile]

What´s wrong with those goddamn apples today? I just got up, made a cup of coffee and wanted to eat an apple. So I opened the package and all those apples were waxed to hell and back and even with nearly boiling hot water it won´t go away. Well, it tasted terrible and my hands are now full with wax.
Gosh darn it, this is madness.

 

[NoID10ts]

so i went to the dry cleaner to have my nostrils cleaned when the rabbit at the counter told me the snake already cleaned them so i ate the rabbit and shit rabbit stew and fed it to the snake

 

[Ancalion]

What´s wrong with those goddamn apples today? I just got up, made a cup of coffee and wanted to eat an apple. So I opened the package and all those apples were waxed to hell and back and even with nearly boiling hot water it won´t go away. Well, it tasted terrible and my hands are now full with wax.
Gosh darn it, this is madness.

I don't advise eating apples and sipping coffee. The time spent on your toilet after that...that's MADNESS! Spartaa!!

 

[saffyangelis]

Kareeeeet!!!

 

[NoID10ts]

With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
Try this trick and spin it, yeah
Your head will collapse
But there's nothing in it
And you'll ask yourself

Where is my mind?

-Pixies

 

[Aces High]

The other day I was sucked through a rift in the time-space continuum and appeared covered in peanut butter and without any clothing in what seemed to be my front yard...and that is why I don't kick the furnace anymore.

 

[Fleur]

It's a Thursday tommorrow... And this fact is a madness itself.

 

[Anthile]

Hm, somehow I still want to know what´s wrong with those Thursdays.

 

[Fleur]

Well, you see... If something bad is going to happen, it will happen at Thursday. Thursdays are like chains of bad luck.

 

[Jesin]

In the words of the great Dentarthurdent, "I could never get the hang of Thursdays."

 

[JoeJoe]

Yesterday I found myself lying in my backyard, wearing nothing but a T-shirt with the words:"I've been kidnapped by aliens and this T-shirt is all they've left me."

 

[Fleur]

*runs to a corner and sits down with her back turned to others*

I haven't done anything wrong, I haven't done anything wrong...It was an accident...I cannot be blamed...

 

[sagewolf]

It's Thursday. Does that mean we're all cursed now? But Thursday can't be bad! Thursday is CHOIR DAY! Don't insult choir day!

*Starts playing imaginary music on an imaginary trumpet*

ImissbandImissbandImissbandImissband

 

[Anthile]

Everyone wants to marry me. Even sandwiches. Weird.

 

[NoID10ts]

so i was walking in the middle of the street today and i slipped and fell on a banana peel so i looked over to my left and about a meter away was the banana whose peel i had slipped on and it was just lying there, sunbathing or something, so i went over to the banana, leaned over, and yelled "PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON YOU WHORE!!!!"

 

[Zezon Vice]

I was playing guitar and it hit me, i wonder how many girls actually like "harmonic fingerings"?

Edit: its only bad if you get it...right?

 

[Ermine]

And sadly, I get it. Thanks a lot. And there's the classic one with a G string and an A minor.

It's raining chinese takeout...

 

[NoID10ts]

The nude banana is suing me for slander now. What an evil little fruit.

 

[Anthile]

The nude banana is suing me for slander now. What an evil little fruit.

Shall I lend you my shotgun? I have made some experiences with those demonic fruits.
Never trust something that grows on a tree, that's what my dad always told me.
He died during the Great Watermelon Assault of '97. He was a decent robot.

 

[NoID10ts]

The Bastards!

 

[Fleur]

Now I'm really starting to think that I'm the only sane person left...

 

[NoID10ts]

Now I'm really starting to think that I'm the only sane person left...

this just demonstrates how insane you really are oh and thursday is coming

and last night i was attacked by a legion of nude bananas so i made a banana creme pie out of them and ate them for breakfast

 

[sagewolf]

Well, you are what you eat, right Noddy? You nudist banana you.

 

[Fleur]

No, I'm perfectly sane.

*smacks Noddy's head with her half-broken porcelain doll, then runs into a dark room to continue to write on the walls while singing lullabies in a creepy and silent voice*

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

The new NoI:

It's amazing what you can find when you type "naked banana" into google images.