Sociable hobbies?

[asmit127]

While a forum full of introverts probably isn't the best place to ask this I'm going to try anyway as searching didn't turn up any related threads

I'm not bored home alone every night reading/being online/listening to music but for some reason I want to be more sociable. I no longer have school to hear of fun things people do and I work with mainly girls who like watching X factor and similar rubbish on TV and getting drunk at the weekend - neither are of any interest to me. Currently I play pool (badly!) and have a couple of drinks with a friend most weekends but that's about it for interaction outside of work (which is a very relaxed and talkative place, hence not needing much interaction outside of it...)

Like most of you I don't like the limelight so drama and singing are out of the running but I'd consider pretty much anything else so please tell me what you do and what keeps you doing it. Also note I'm in a smallish town in the UK, so baseball, basketball and (sadly) icehockey aren't an option...

Thanks in advance!

 

[y4r5xeym5]

1) Buy a D&D Rulebook
2) Acquire Strange Friends
3) Get Booze. Lots of Booze
4) ???
5) PROFIT *

* Warning: PROFIT subject to death

 

[s0nystyle]

You don't like singing? *sigh*

Try playing baseball or going to the bar and watching whatever's playing atm. You don't have to know whats going on just meet new people and introduce yourself.

I have yet to meet a complete dick who ignored me after introducing myself. I guess the best way to be sociable is to just GET OUT THERE AND BE SOMEBODY!

 

[asmit127]

D&D isn't a computer game it seems (I had to look it up!) but that I've never heard of it may mean it's not popular here. Though by having a rulebook and attracting "strange friends" maybe it's a bit underground-geek? I'll look into it

You like singing s0nystyle? Feel free to try and sell it to me, apparently I used to sing well pre my voice breaking but gave it up for that reason shortly before loosing my memory. Squeak-talking is bad enough without trying to sing!

I'm not seeking friends as such, more something to do and be able to discuss with people who also do. I could watch soccer (pretty much the only sport shown in bars in the UK) and know what's going on, but it's mindless. Sitting doing nothing (ok, drink beer and shout at TV would change this ) is hard, I'd usually have my hands busy eating, braiding an audio cable or knitting while watching TV on the rare occasion I switch one on. Thanks for the suggestion anyway

 

[s0nystyle]

kereoke is amazingly fun, especially with friends+coworkers who've never seen you sing.

PRO-TIP: SERENADING YOUR BEST FRIEND MAKES EVERYONE SMILE, just dont try serenading his wife

 

[Adymus]

Join a really obscure but fun subculture. Preferably one involved with a form of music so you can get your fear of dancing out of the way too.

 

[s0nystyle]

salsa dancing is incredibly fun as well. im sure there's a salsa dancing club SOMEWHERE in the UK

 

[Words]

Get a car and drive alone to random places and greet random people.

 

[Adymus]

Get a car and drive alone to random places and greet random people.

Nah gas is expensive, ride a bike or something.

I cringe every time I have to drive someone I am supposed to be.

 

[s0nystyle]

Nah gas is expensive, ride a bike or something.

I cringe every time I have to drive someone I am supposed to be.

wtf?

 

[Words]

^ Ditto. but you get it, so no need to explain.

 

[Adymus]

wtf?

oh shut up, you know what I mean.

 

[intuitivet]

1) Buy a D&D Rulebook
2) Acquire Strange Friends
3) Get Booze. Lots of Booze
4) ???
5) PROFIT *

* Warning: PROFIT subject to death

I have stages 1 and 2 set >=D

Um, maybe do martial arts or join a writing group? I'm planning on joining one when college is over to meet more people. That or you could join your local games workshop and spend all your money on warhammer!

 

[Red Devil]

My mother has succeeded in annoying me into taking up sociable hobbies. Bleh. I've decided to learn a musical instrument. Guitar or drums probably. Maybe you could give that a try? Or maybe join an art class or something? Oil painting is a lot of fun.

 

[walfin]

Do you not know people who play football?

Or at least watch football?

Or are you uninterested?

(Ironically the poster before me is named Red Devil )

 

[Red Devil]

Ah, someone noticed!

 

[asmit127]

Reading all these suggestions I'm just slipping back to my old negative way of thinking. I could argue most of them with the exception of salsa dancing (no idea what it involves), art class (I suck, but if you don't try you at something you don't improve, I've never tried) and martial arts (there must be breaks to talk in between learning to kick someone's ass?) So guess I should pick one of them. All available in my town

Hell, I'd may as well list my reasons against the rest for your amusement/rebuttal!

Karaoke - need to know songs other people know. I don't and don't want to.
Driving randomly - I can drive but have no will to waste money on a car/insurance/tax/gas...
Play football - I suck (tried at school and again at uni, it's not gonna change!)
Watch football - nearest good team is 50 miles away, see driving randomly. See bored hands above for "in pub watching"
Instrument - years to be good enough for a band, not sociable till in band
Warhammer - spend years buying and painting before being sociable playing
Obscure musical subculture - I'd quite like to see an orchestra for my next "gig", old people don't dance

I have stages 1 and 2 set >=D

All you need is to get booze and profit? Sounds like you're set for life!

 

[s0nystyle]

maybe i'm not hanging out with the right people but i've NEVER met someone who owned a D&D set

 

[EditorOne]

"Join a really obscure but fun subculture. Preferably one involved with a form of music so you can get your fear of dancing out of the way too."

Yeah, well, I've got one custom-made for shy INTPs, historical reenacting. Pick your era, find a club or "unit" and just do it. I have friends in every state east of the Mississippi and some states to the west of it by virtue of doing American Civil War living history, and I've been involved in making three movies, as a core extra.

It works for me because for a weekend I'm not me. I'm someone else, and while I'm not wearing a mask, it's still pretty good camouflage. It also feeds my mind.

You get to understand new (actually old) patterns, making sense out of history by attempting to recreate it. You get insights you never would have dreamed you'd have, you are part of an intensely focused group interested in the same things you are, which makes communication and "socializing" a lot easier (much like this forum, by the way.) Since my particular niche of the hobby focuses on history-heavy living history that covers more than the military, it offers study on how socializing took place in another era, one with different ideas of what constituted proper behavior, virtue, value, etc.

Just as a couple of examples: Teenagers were, in polite society, not given much freedom to mingle with the opposite sex. Still, it had to happen otherwise the human race would die out. So places where guys and girls could talk included church (which made it a lot more popular than it might otherwise have been ). But they also, during the particular era, had started gymnasium clubs, where boys and girls could intermingle under the auspices of "exercise is good for you." And dances as social events -- the women had dance cards, with partners all signed up, and the proper thing to do was to not have any repeaters, so you got to have more intermingling. Additionally some of the dances themselves, like the Virginia Reel, cycled dancers through steps that led to a different partner for ever "verse" in the song.

I didn't get involved until I was 40. I've noticed that the young people involved in it find it quite enjoyable. The drawback for younger folks is the expense; most of them have parents who are already involved and foot the bill for accurate clothing, equipment, etc., which can be pretty hefty costs for some time periods.

The other parallel to this forum is that those involved in living history are serious people, serious about the value of the core activity that is shared in much the same way we're serious about INTPness, however silly we might be about other things. (We're not talking SCA ((Society for Creative Anachronism)) stuff here. That's a whole other thing. We're talking about attempts to recreate history as authentically as possible in order to understand more about the people who made the history. I'm not sure what the SCA is about but it seems to involve cleavage and codpieces more often than not. That's not a judgment, of course, it is an observation. )

Anyway, that's one social activity that I know works for one very INTP INTP. If you want to know more drop a line and I'll try to find something coming up you can go check out from the sidelines. Don't send me your detailed geography, just what state. Or country, now that I think of it ...

 

[Jah]

pick-pocketing.
It's a challenge, and potentially get you into really challenging social situations.
Also a motivator for long running sessions, a steady income, and sometimes fringe benefits, like a new car or a house.

 

[RandeKnight]

Noone mentioned boardgames?
No, not monopoly - things like Settlers of Catan or Puerto Rico. Or if you're more intellectual, there's Scrabble clubs everywhere.

 

[y4r5xeym5]

I have stages 1 and 2 set >=D

Um, maybe do martial arts or join a writing group? I'm planning on joining one when college is over to meet more people. That or you could join your local games workshop and spend all your money on warhammer!

You gain awesome points

Really though, just find a local games store and chill there for a few hours. You'll find something of interest.

 

[Words]

pick-pocketing.
It's a challenge, and potentially get you into really challenging social situations.
Also a motivator for long running sessions, a steady income, and sometimes fringe benefits, like a new car or a house.

This sounds like a great idea. Thank you.