OH GOD

[Oblivious]

THE CHEESES. THEY ARE MULTIPLYING.

 

[humblecheesecake]

I want cheese.

 

[Jesse]

JOIN US!

I mean what's wrong with Cheese?

 

[Minuend]

YOU TAKE THE GRATER, I'LL FIRE UP THE TOASTER !!!!

 

[Melllvar]

I mean what's wrong with Cheese?

There's nothing wrong with one cheese, but when you get too many you can be facing a grey goo scenario: a total cheesularity. To demonstrate what I'm talking about, here is a graph of cheeses over time:

[bimgx=500]http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/8409/cheesesovertime.png[/bimgx]

At a certain point the number of cheeses hits a critical mass (of cheese) and the cheese growth rate changes from approximately linear to exponential. This "cheesy point" has been marked with a red dot. Once this occurs, computer simulations predict total cheesification of the planet within 72 hours. Here is a scale model of what the post-cheese world could look like:

Spoiler

Or for the flat-earthers, more like this:

Spoiler

 

[smithcommajohn]

CHEESE-A-GEDDON!

 

[Chimera]

I'm feta up with all the cheese. It really grates on my nerves...ricotta do something before it's too late!
​

 

[humblecheesecake]

Cheesus, you motherf***ers are crazy.

 

[xbox]

YOU TAKE THE GRATER, I'LL FIRE UP THE TOASTER !!!!

I'll get the tomato sauce.

 

[ApostateAbe]

There's nothing wrong with one cheese, but when you get too many you can be facing a grey goo scenario: a total cheesularity. To demonstrate what I'm talking about, here is a graph of cheeses over time:

[bimgx=500]http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/8409/cheesesovertime.png[/bimgx]

At a certain point the number of cheeses hits a critical mass (of cheese) and the cheese growth rate changes from approximately linear to exponential. This "cheesy point" has been marked with a red dot. Once this occurs, computer simulations predict total cheesification of the planet within 72 hours. Here is a scale model of what the post-cheese world could look like:

Spoiler

Or for the flat-earthers, more like this:

Spoiler

What about those of us who are inquisitive and pioneering enough to accept the scientific theory that the Earth is shaped like a dildo? Find a picture of a cheese dildo, and you are forgiven.

 

[Cheeseumpuffs]

Mwahahahahahahahahahaha OUR PLAN IS WORKING

 

[The Gopher]

All these cheesy jokes are getting on my nerves.

 

[Oblivious]

I would say to the forum as I said to those who have joined this thread: I have nothing to offer but Cheddar, Mascarpone, Swiss and Feta. We have before us an ordeal of the most cheesy kind. We have before us many, many long months of grating and of melting.

You ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: Calcium. Calcium at all costs — Calcium in spite of all Lactose — Calcium, however long and hard the road may be, for without Calcium there are no Healthy Bones.

 

[smithcommajohn]

Cheese is Gouda for you!

 

[jameslikespie]

Did anyone here of that one old movie which said that cheese had small mites in it?

 

[Melkor]

I'm not afraid of something I can eat AND outbreed.

Come try!

 

[Roran]

Alright, who cut the cheese?

 

[Lobstrich]

Yeah, I'm join the anti-cheese party. Cheese is sour milk.....

 

[GYX_Kid]

Just lay back and wait until cheeses get put in your mouth/body/soul, you'll see the light

 

[grey matters]

I'm feta up with all the cheese. It really grates on my nerves...ricotta do something before it's too late!
​

So you think you are a cheese wiz huh? I'm gouda kill you for that. Someone please brie me the grater I'm gonna Canestrato you.

 

[Lostwitheal]

Cheese
Puffy
Cheeseumpuffs
Cheese
Cake
Humblecheesecake

They're all in this together. It's a conspiracy

 

[Oblivious]

You mentioned cheese twice dude.

 

[Particle]

Thank goodness I was here to point out your serious error, Melllvar. You have neglected to take into account the effect that mountains of visible cheese has on hunger. Hunger then has effects on cheese! It's really quite a wonderfully balanced system with cheese replication causing hunger and hunger controlling the cheese. Isn't nature wonderful?

 

[smithcommajohn]

There is a feeling that cheese can be on a neverending exponential curve, lest we forget the great cheese bubble of 1964. I suspect this particular bubble will pop sometime within the next couple months.

 

[Lostwitheal]

You mentioned cheese twice dude.

I was trying to indicate that Cheese has been hybridised with two other names seperately in order to create two distinct hybrids

 

[Cheeseumpuffs]

If you really think about it.... it's the people that are threatening the existence of cheese. Something must be done.

 

[smithcommajohn]

Atomic Bomb is to Nagasaki as Cheese is to World

 

[Oblivious]

Gentlemen!

A plan of attack has been devised. Based on our superior intelligence, for which we have lost many skilled and dedicated agents for, we now have the means to thwart our mozzarella based menace.

Well, donuts are never stealthy, for one thing. At least in my experience. You put them in your mouth and two seconds later they appear on your measuring tape.

The plan is thus:

Step 1) We shall funnel the cheeses into the kitchen by stealthily littering the killing zone with a multitude of delicious donuts.

Step 2) We shall then hide or destroy all the measuring tapes. This will foment confusion in the ranks of cheese when they seek to measure themselves after their sugary feast.

Step 3) ???

Step 4) Profit

Though it pains me greatly to sacrifice so many of our fine and delectable donut comrades to our curdled rivals, we must remember that the only good cheese is a heavier and confused one.

/salute

 

[cheese]

HOW DARE YOU!





I.....AM..... CHEDDAR!

 

[soupymess]

I see one problem, Oblivious:

cheese is a heartbeat => everyone's got a heart => we are a palpitating curd-cloud

 

[Oblivious]

HOW DARE YOU!





I.....AM..... CHEDDAR!

Cheddar, Marscarpone, Blue... you're all the same to me!!