I have been summoned.

[Deleted member 1424]

Of course. It's now loud external rage.

 

[QuickTwist]

drop jam on the carpet

I know some people who would freak the fuck out if that happened.

Choose your target wisely.

 

[loveofreason]

Look at all the cuteness this thread has attracted!

I'm lost for words.

I think I missed you guys.

 

[redbaron]

Look at all the cuteness this thread has attracted!

I'm lost for words.

I think I missed you guys.

*pukes*

 

[loveofreason]

RB sweetiepie! Do you like knives?

 

[NoID10ts]

Oh, loveofreason is great with knives! I once saw her circumcise a baby on a spinning wheel from 30 paces away!

 

[redbaron]

RB sweetiepie! Do you like knives?

dare we dagger double date??

*unpukes*

 

[Jennywocky]

she just wants to cut you down to size

 

[QuickTwist]

Pi ness.

 

[redbaron]

she just wants to cut you down to size

I've always wanted a girl who was good at geometry.

 

[QuickTwist]

I've always wanted a girl who was good at geometry.

I hear asians are wicked good at that shit. You should call 1800doasian

 

[loveofreason]

Woohoo! Triple date, RB, Adaire and! and.. wait? Who else is coming?

 

[redbaron]

I think Jenny wanted to cut a rug too

Why not just invite everyone to the knife party and let the geometrically gifted reap the rewards?

 

[Melkor]

Ugh a date?
Things were nice for a bit then you had to go and ruin them.

GO ON THEN.
But don't come crying to me when you get your hearts broken and scalded by the hot oil I'm brewing!

 

[Cognisant]

*relaxing in Melkor's barrel of hot oil with a small towel on my head*

Come on in it's sooo relaaaxing.

 

[Jennywocky]

Is it vegetable oil or the more health-minded olive oil? it makes a big difference, using vegetable oil and its health impact really burns me up.

 

[redbaron]

Oiling up before a date is a crucial part of dating success

 

[Polaris]

^Also useful if you wanna...‘slip’ away quietly

 

[Auburn]

@Polaris ! You're still alive.
Too many feels. You people are horrible.

That's it. If one more old-timer pops up, I'm making a Senior Party Thread.

I'm making special design canes for each old-timer, too. Fit to specifications.

 

[QuickTwist]

Damn, just out of reach...

 

[Jennywocky]

@Polaris ! You're still alive.
Too many feels. You people are horrible.

That's it. If one more old-timer pops up, I'm making a Senior Party Thread.

I'm making special design canes for each old-timer, too. Fit to specifications.

you need to make me two, because I will probably break the first one from rapping on the skulls of whippersnappers too much... *pops dentures back out

 

[NoID10ts]

Every time I come back here I remember that I have absolutely nothing useful to contribute. My brain is a wasteland of broken thoughts and opinions.

 

[Polaris]

You're still alive.

*Rattles coffin furiously*

Every time I come back here I remember that I have absolutely nothing useful to contribute. My brain is a wasteland of broken thoughts and opinions.

Your version would still be unique to some of us.

 

[redbaron]

Every time I come back here I remember that I have absolutely nothing useful to contribute.

i don't let that stop me and neither should you

 

[loveofreason]

Post to post revenge! Ugh... wait... Damnit!

*leaps out of thread*

My cane! Where's my cane! Where's my synaptic stimulant hairnet?

 

[The Gopher]

Every time I come back here I remember that I have absolutely nothing useful to contribute. My brain is a wasteland of broken thoughts and opinions.

Well luckily for you INTP's generally like things being correct and fixed so if you throw enough broken parts out there you'll get back something in return that eventually works. Even if it is Cog's murder bot.

 

[Cognisant]

It's not a... it's not meant to be... that's not it's primary...
Okay it's a murder bot.

Every time I come back here I remember that I have absolutely nothing useful to contribute. My brain is a wasteland of broken thoughts and opinions.

And not talking to people will fix that?

 

[Black Rose]

Thank Satan, I was running out of orphans.

 

[Melkor]

Wow we went from hot oil to hot garbage.
Someone bring me a mountain of boiled sweets and a pile of robot succubuses, it's getting STUFFY IN HERE.

Hi Polaris, your lack of a cute avatar enrages me.
FIX ITTTTT

 

[NoID10ts]

Wow we went from hot oil to hot garbage.
Someone bring me a mountain of boiled sweets and a pile of robot succubuses, it's getting STUFFY IN HERE.

Hi Polaris, your lack of a cute avatar enrages me.
FIX ITTTTT

You're the reason I believe in nothing Melkor. There simply cannot be meaning and a Melkor in the same universe.

 

[Black Rose]

You're the reason I believe in nothing Melkor. There simply cannot be meaning and a Melkor in the same universe.

But I do exist in the same universe as him.
You simply have forgotten me but I have always been there.
I am Animekitty. I am meaning.

 

[NoID10ts]

But I do exist in the same universe as him.
You simply have forgotten me but I have always been there.
I am Animekitty. I am meaning.

I don't know, I think that only complicates the problem.

 

[Minuend]

Every time I come back here I remember that I have absolutely nothing useful to contribute. My brain is a wasteland of broken thoughts and opinions.

Nice putting pressure on us to having to contribute. My existence have inherit value, damn it, how else am I to justify parasitism )---:

 

[QuickTwist]

I wish I existed in some fairy tale where I was an actual person, that would be cool with me.

 

[NoID10ts]

Nice putting pressure on us to having to contribute. My existence have inherit value, damn it, how else am I to justify parasitism )---:

Minuend! My life has meaning again!

 

[Polaris]

Hi Polaris, your lack of a cute avatar enrages me.
FIX ITTTTT

No. You’re too cute when you’re angry

 

[Minuend]

Minuend! My life has meaning again!

So that's where my meaning went, you stole it!

 

[NoID10ts]

So that's where my meaning went, you stole it!

I'm using it to prop open the door to my pre-owned condom shop.

 

[QuickTwist]

I'm using it to prop open the door to my pre-owned condom shop.

Is that where you sell gently used condoms at a fraction of the price?

 

[Black Rose]

So that's where my meaning went, you stole it!

I'm using it to prop open the door to my pre-owned condom shop.

Listen I know circumcision is a popular sport these days but there is no need for revenge circumcision. That knife looks sharp. Simply give Minuend his foreskin back NoID10ts. You don't need to steal the meaning of others. Be satisfied you have your own.

 

[Jennywocky]

I'm using it to prop open the door to my pre-owned condom shop.

I think the proper term nowadays is "refurbished" and/or "Trojan-certified."

 

[Black Rose]

Avatars look a certain way for a reason.

 

[Cegorach]

I probably deserve to be with all the mundane yet frequent acts of evil I've been doing.
I think if I drop jam on the carpet or scowl at strangers on the bus just a FEW more times I'll have banked enough evil to be the equivalent of burning down a small yet very hopeful orphanage.

Hm, Petty Evil. Looks like we may need another axis in the Character Alignment system.

 

[Cognisant]

Petty evil is true evil.

https://www.penny-arcade.com/news/post/2010/02/17/a-funny-dad-story

 

[The Gopher]

Hm, Petty Evil. Looks like we may need another axis in the Character Alignment system.

View attachment 3035

OH MY FUCKING GOD IT'S CEG.

 

[Auburn]

@Cegorach !!

you look rather cadaverous

how are things on the other side?

 

[Cegorach]

OH MY FUCKING GOD IT'S CEG.

That, or some approximation of him.

Ermahgerd?!​

@Cegorach !!

you look rather cadaverous

how are things on the other side?

The Things on this side are anarchic and enduring, my interactions with them, an infinitely more burdensome issue.

We undead abstain​

Those Things far too luminous​

Yet lost souls linger​

Oh! I don't even like poetry.

Perhaps the Things in the land of the living are more harmonious; I've found the little I've read of CT interesting, by the way.

Congratulations on the book.

 

[Auburn]

this place could use some poetry, dammit.

the soul needs some heavier meats instead of only the trifle of comedic banter to keep us afloat in this brief existence.

speaking of which...

..i look undead too, when i haven't eaten breakfast. >.>

*serves Ceg some nice oatmeal*

 

[loveofreason]

That look isn't caused by lack of oatmeal, it's from too many noodles! >:

Disturbingly, when one searches up "things", one of the first images google returns is this:

Spoiler

What even is it? >.>

And welcome back to topside, Cegorach!

 

[Cognisant]

Clearly it's a right hand warmer for those cold lonely nights on the computer.