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Functions Roleplay Story - Discussion & Reactions

Auburn

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I love it!
Don't listen to Ore! =P

Hehe, and of course, the intps make Ti look all badass.. :rolleyes: :smoker:
Oh my, I'm scared to continue this story..
I feel the expectations would be high and I think I'd come short of awesome and disappoint.
 

Cognisant

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Re: Functions Roleplay Story

I know I know Oresama, but any other way would have resulted in me writing a novel.
Yeah I see that now.

I know right? Four posts in and Ti is already set up for bad assery.
The low calorie diet should keep Ti from being too active, after all Ti is the function of planning, preparation and procrastination.

I've also tried to introduce a five man band dynamic, it makes group dynamics easier.
The Hero = Te
The Lancer = Ni
The Smart Guy/Gal = Ti (Superpowerd Evil Side, The Stoic)
The Big Guy/Gal = Ne, perhaps (Genius Bruiser, The Heart?)
The Chick = Fe (Light) & Fi (Dark)

The Mary & Pippin Show = Se & Si
(funny idiots who make stuff happen and are occasionally insightful)

Oh my, I'm scared to continue this story..
Be more scared of what will happen to you if you don't...
 

GarmGarf

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Re: Functions Roleplay Story

Story is shaping up great; keep up the good work guys.

I think we might need another thread dedicated to this, but for discussion of it (e.g: "Functions Roleplay Story Discussion"). A mod could then move all non-story posts to that thread.

Furthermore, we could even move the instruction introduction in the OP to the new thread, and replace it in this thread with a setting description, and also include a small notice and link in the OP linking to the new thread "for rules and explanations".
 

echoplex

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Re: Functions Roleplay Story

hehe, I'm loving this. A while back I actually thought of an idea very similar to this. Mine was a sort-of comic (well, it could just be dialogue, but I could see it as a comic) with all 8 lovable characters in all sorts of hilarious situations. I thought of each function having their own episode dedicated to them, with each episode having a moral based on what the function had to learn/overcome. (after all, they all have obvious weaknesses)

For example, one could be Ti (or maybe Si?) learning the value of fun with help from Se, or Ti and Fe falling in love, only to realize of course that it would never work out. Or maybe Fi learning to be more assertive and Si learning to let go of the past.

A common theme in each episode might be the group finding something far away for Se to do so as to not be annoyed by its antics; or Fi going on a moral crusade; or Fe having a crush on yet another unsuspecting (except Ni) character; or Ni being happily accused of being a know-it-all; or Ne coming up with strange ideas that it can't hide from the others, some of which causing Ne embarrassment; Te being a dick; etc. etc...

I even thought of mysterious extra functions entering this "world", confounding the regular ones as they attempt to understand them.
 

Words

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Re: Functions Roleplay Story

Ne needs to ask "what if" questions..
 

Kuu

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Re: Functions Roleplay Story

Yeah I see that now.


The low calorie diet should keep Ti from being too active, after all Ti is the function of planning, preparation and procrastination.

I've also tried to introduce a five man band dynamic, it makes group dynamics easier.
The Hero = Te
The Lancer = Ni
The Smart Guy/Gal = Ti (Superpowerd Evil Side, The Stoic)
The Big Guy/Gal = Ne, perhaps (Genius Bruiser, The Heart?)
The Chick = Fe (Light) & Fi (Dark)

The Mary & Pippin Show = Se & Si
(funny idiots who make stuff happen and are occasionally insightful)


Be more scared of what will happen to you if you don't...

Interesting thread Auburn.

Ne should be more of a Cloudcuckoolander (Obfuscating Insanity / The Ophelia)

While Si & Se shouldn't be funny or idiots... but I dunno... Se sort of an athlete type, but not necessarily stupid, while Si more of a melancholic obsessive-compulsive.

but meh. I have no ideas to actually write, shall proceed to lurk.
 

Auburn

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Re: Functions Roleplay Story

I think we might need another thread dedicated to this, but for discussion of it (e.g: "Functions Roleplay Story Discussion"). A mod could then move all non-story posts to that thread.
This actually sounds like a great idea to me ^^
There are a lot of things I want to comment about but hold back because I don't want this thread to go off track on some tangent. I do hope the split gets done.

I wrote a massive reply to the story yesterday but then I realized my reply was taking the story into a more action/adventure based theme. Of course, that's not a bad thing, but I guess I wanted to focus a lot more on the actual interaction dynamics between the functions. That's what makes this story stand out to me from others, so I didn't want to destroy that. ^^

***

On another note I have some ideas for background information on the eight orphans. I thought it'd add more substance to the story. =]

Te = Male, 13 years old. The oldest of the eight and also a leader. When their parents died, he took the roll of 'father' among the eight.

Fi = Female, 12 years old. Second oldest. She was about seven years old when her parents passed away. The loss was hardest on her than anyone else, and her once angelic wings took on a shade of gray. She worries a lot for her siblings, not wanting to suffer another loss of that magnitude.

Ne = Female, 11 years old. Quite comical with her random comments. Isn't afraid to be embarrassed in front of others and is very approachable, jolly and playful.

Ni = Female, 10 years old. She never quiet acts her age. She's the one her older siblings often go to for advice, and is quite possibly the most mature of all of them. She is, however, sarcastic and somewhat pessimist - but not without good reason. Time and time again she's foreseen bad news coming, and more often than not she's right.

Ti = Male, 9 years old. Brilliant with computers and nearly all electronics. As mentioned before, rather skinny and fragile as well.

Si = Male, 8 years old. A bookworm. He spends his free time reading. Sometimes he randomly spits out facts, often irrelevant, if another thought reminds him of it. This sometimes annoys the others.

Fe = Female, 7 years old. The most lovable and tenderhearted of them all. She was too young for the death of her parents to have a deep impact on her, and is not jaded like her older sister Fi.

Se = Male, 6 years old. The youngest and most out-of-control of them all. Fi is constantly chasing after him to make sure he doesn't get hurt, or treating his wounds when he tries one of his many stunts. Still, he usually manages to brighten up the atmosphere when his more melancholy siblings have a dark cloud over them.
 

Auburn

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I was also randomly thinking "It'd be really weird if people actually had names like these in real life" - so I started thinking about what a remedy for this would be. Some more realistic pronunciation suggestions that came to mind for the eight:

Te = Tae
Fi = Fee
Ne = Nay
Ni = Nai [pronounced like the word "nigh"]
Ti = Tai [like the beginning of the word Taiwan]
Si = Sai [sah-ee]
Fe = Fae
Se = See

On another note, I sorta started a little romance thing with Ti and Fe. ^^
I thought it'd be interesting to see certain of the eight form specific relations with each other to demonstrate some of the classic themes dealing with personalities. For instance, Te and Ni seem to work close to each other as Commander and Adviser.

Edit: Ok, I'll shut up now... > > *feels like he's getting a bit too excited*
 

Auburn

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No no.. > >
Well see, it has to do with Fe's nature. It's more of a puppy love sorta thing, as opposed to anything even remotely sexual. And Fe gets crushes on people regardless of whether they're relatives or not. XD

And the purpose of it is to hopefully demonstrate to the forum what this type of relationship looks like in action - especially considering the relation between Ti and Fe is one that is central to INTPs. I sorta also wanted this story to be informative to those who are a bit less aware of how exactly the functions interact with one another, y'know? To provide practical and tangible examples of them in use.

However, the story may or may not turn out this way seeing how each member that posts has a level of control in where it goes. =P Nor do I intend to force it to go my way either. I'd be interesting to see where others take it. =]
 

Adymus

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Woh woh woh, I okay I was just going back to write more stuff but then...

Auburn, did you change what you wrote last? I remember the group split in two?

I kind of liked that because it would give us a chance to role-play the actually dynamics and thought processes for the INTP-ISFJ-ESFJ-ENTP types as well as the ISFP-ENTJ-INTJ-ESFP group.
 

Auburn

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You liked that one? ^^
Um, I saved that post in notepad if you'd like to continue off that storyline instead. =]
There's countless ways the story could go and I have no clue which would be better. lol

I guess I could even merge the two! ^^
 

Adymus

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You liked that one? ^^
Um, I saved that post in notepad if you'd like to continue off that storyline instead. =]
There's countless ways the story could go and I have no clue which would be better. lol

I guess I could even merge the two! ^^
Don't worry about, it's not a big deal.


By the way, your models for the characters was exactly how I was approaching it, even the genders and ages too.
 

Dormouse

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This is awesome, but it needs more pictures. :p
 

Kuu

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Auburn made them all incestuous lolis! :phear:

(I'm not complaining)
 

GarmGarf

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No no.. > >
Well see, it has to do with Fe's nature. It's more of a puppy love sorta thing, as opposed to anything even remotely sexual. And Fe gets crushes on people regardless of whether they're relatives or not. XD

And the purpose of it is to hopefully demonstrate to the forum what this type of relationship looks like in action - especially considering the relation between Ti and Fe is one that is central to INTPs. I sorta also wanted this story to be informative to those who are a bit less aware of how exactly the functions interact with one another, y'know? To provide practical and tangible examples of them in use.

However, the story may or may not turn out this way seeing how each member that posts has a level of control in where it goes. =P Nor do I intend to force it to go my way either. I'd be interesting to see where others take it. =]

Eh, to be honest, I think that the best course of action would be to change the lore so that they are not relatives, and instead are all children from the same orphanage (which got destroyed/imprisoned, but they escaped as a group or something). They could be so close that they treat each other like family, though.

This is my proposal to be safe (this is the Internet, after all >_>), and to leave more (believable) options for the story's progression.


(Also, in the future, families will probably tend to have less and less children. So, ok, while the lore could be that this trend changed for this time period, or that this particular family were an exception, if the future were to follow the current trend it would be even more rare for families to have 8 children than it is now.)
 

Adymus

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I actually thought them being siblings was more symbolic than it was literal. (In terms of all being a part of one mind)

I kind of like the orphanage idea, like they call each other brother and sister but they are actually not. And this "Mother" person is just who took care of all of them.
 

Auburn

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Yes! Brilliant!
This allows for a lot more liberty in the plot. =]
(or perhaps I should say, liberty while not violating any social/cultural taboos - because as we all know, intps follow the norms. =P)
 

GarmGarf

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(or perhaps I should say, liberty while not violating any social/cultural taboos - because as we all know, intps follow the norms. =P)

(INTPs do tend to have personal conservative traits, though (Si). It's like we don't care what others do on principle, but we do care what we do, including reading about incest for some of us. >_>)
 

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It may just be me, but I would have a hard time relating to young children. They've already done things no normal child would be able to, but then again they're not normal children. You don't have to change it, but in my mind they will always seem far older.

This thread actually reminded me a bit of redvsblue reconstruction. They had an A.I. that was split 8 or 9 ways, and each section became it's own 'semi' personality. For example you had logic (delta), memory (epsilon) deceit (gamma), and rage (omega). I think it would be neat if these characters were all separate parts of a single whole. Essentially all the same person, but fragmented. This could potentially show how each function is vulnerable on it's own. Yes even Ti. It would demonstrate the fragility of the minds. You would essentially be dealing with 8 different and extremely unbalanced minds, and their only hope for sanity is their reliance upon each other.

As a bonus, any relationships would just become masturbation. :D

A premise for this could be eight identical clones (except for XY/XX), each bioengineered to only possess one dominant function. Their 'father' could be the futuristic mad scientist/pyschologist version of Carl Jung, and their mother Isabel Briggs Myers. :D



This thread would have been a great concept for the forum manga.
 

Adymus

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Well I don't really mind that the Functions are being depicted as people, just because it would be misleading to suggest that this is how your functions are actually working and communicating with each other in a single mind. Because it doesn't work like that at all, a single personality type is not going to have all 8 types with an equally loud voice. They will have 4 conscious processes working and communicating together, with a "chain of command" dependent on their type and hierarchy. The other four would just be working behind the scenes and not actually present in the conscious process of cogitation and behavior.

So I like the idea of of them being people with exaggerated dominant functions, this way you can see how they create synergy and conflict with other ones.
 

Cognisant

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Eh, to be honest, I think that the best course of action would be to change the lore so that they are not relatives, and instead are all children from the same orphanage (which got destroyed/imprisoned, but they escaped as a group or something). They could be so close that they treat each other like family, though.

This is my proposal to be safe (this is the Internet, after all >_>), and to leave more (believable) options for the story's progression.
*sigh* As a writer I can't help but want to write an incest story, the "will they / won't they" dynamics create this rich emotional tension which in turn plays off the reader's inner "should they / shouldn't they" moral turmoil, in summary it's pure gold.
To be metaphorical, it's the forbidden fruit.

However from a practical perspective it's probably better that we have a group of unrelated characters, since as you may already be able to tell I've never had any siblings and so I have little to no perspective on such psychology.

This thread would have been a great concept for the forum manga.
This is awesome, but it needs more pictures.
I'll give it a go (character portraits), although the computer I'm using right now is just a terminal and I can't download any software onto it, so I'll have to make do with paint *twitch* or draw irl then scan it, an agonizing process.
 

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Well I don't really mind that the Functions are being depicted as people, just because it would be misleading to suggest that this is how your functions are actually working and communicating with each other in a single mind. Because it doesn't work like that at all, a single personality type is not going to have all 8 types with an equally loud voice. They will have 4 conscious processes working and communicating together, with a "chain of command" dependent on their type and hierarchy. The other four would just be working behind the scenes and not actually present in the conscious process of cogitation and behavior.

So I like the idea of of them being people with exaggerated dominant functions, this way you can see how they create synergy and conflict with other ones.

Well the way it played out in my head, is you would have fragmented individuals, each with the a single dominant overbearing trait. However through exposure to one another, they'd gain a sort of awareness and their personalities would start to complete themselves. Ie they would develop their other functions. I didn't mean to imply they'd reconverge or remain a single personality; more that they'd been split apart and would go through a painful process of becoming new wholes. Like an earthworm, so to speak. :P

Though I'm just musing and playing with ideas.
 

Adymus

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Well the way it played out in my head, is you would have a fragmented individuals, each with the a single dominant overbearing trait. However through exposure to one another, they'd gain a sort of awareness and their personalities would start to complete themselves. Ie they would develop their other functions. I didn't mean to imply they'd reconverge or remain a single personality; more that they'd been split apart and would go through a painful process of becoming new wholes. Like an earthworm, so to speak. :P

Though I'm just musing and playing with ideas.
*shrugs*

That's a really cool idea too. You should add to the story!

This is why I don't think we should necessarily all be standardizing the thematic depictions of the functions, because I kind of like seeing the different subjective portrayals.
 

Auburn

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It may just be me, but I would have a hard time relating to young children. They've already done things no normal child would be able to, but then again they're not normal children. You don't have to change it, but in my mind they will always seem far older.
It's not realistic, that's true. Though, if we consider that each child has [6-13] years developing that one function alone, it makes sense that it would be at a very generous level of development.

And amazing ideas btw. ^^
There's probably enough potential in them to create numerous other Function stories/mangas! This doesn't have to be the only one. ;)

Fukyo - Sure you do! The trend so far has been to speak for all eight in the same post but even small contributions of just a couple of them interacting helps move the story along. It's difficult to juggle eight characters all at once.

Adymus - If it's alright with you, I think I'll go ahead an reinsert the group split. I actually added that originally for that same reason; to see the dynamics play out in two different groups according to specific personalities. (you freak me out sometimes dude. we think way too alike)

It also helps the writing process because then other members could add to one side of the story while others add to the opposite side - neither having to juggle quite as many characters.

***
Just curious. Have any of you wanted to speak in your different functions before? I've been tempted numerous times to divide my posts into sections according to the functions that originated the thoughts, but I shy away because it seems silly to do so.

I'm especially tempted to do this when I have conflicting ideas and feel that expressing that conflict in the open, just as it is without clashing them together, for the forum to see, would yield the best explanation of my thoughts on the matter.
 

Darby

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I am noticing how people really wish to shape the story their own way, and I wouldn't mind seeing how each person interprets each function. so I propose that you write what you wish, and if you disagree with what the last person said and would like to change it, then do so but tag the upper left corner as to where your splitting the story so we can follow it.

as in the example of them staying together or splitting, whoever posted the first can leave it alone, and the person who wants to change it just marks the top (A), and anyone who continues off that branch puts (A) at the top, and if there is another branch off a branch, then alternate letters/numbers so (A1)

EDIT: To symbolize the split (in story) of the two groups, you could use a symbol rather than number/letter, like "#" so the story would go (A1a1a1#) where the symbol represents which group of characters your dealing with inside the stories tangent that deals with two groups.

to resolve the issue of their being a branch off the first story after the initial branch of (A), then it would start with a number, and not a letter, but would alternate the same (1A1A1A)

EDIT: Also, if someone misses their que to split, but would still like to, thay can put the post number they would wish to split off from before they label their new tangent

this way we can create more of a branching story that people can shape as they will, and if someone doesn't like something they can just change it without destroying someone elses story.
 

Firehazard159

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For some reason, I keep thinking "In the end, it's going to turn out to be a single person, and his insanity drove him to divide his thoughts into multiple processes and ended up talking to them to keep the loneliness at bay." haha.

To me the different ages seem to represent different levels of development (Further implying to me that this is potentially building up to be a single persons personality :P)

(And I just now realized adaire said a similar thing to what I was typing XD. I should really read all the posts before writing my own, but I wanted untainted thoughts. <3 RVB)

*sits patiently, ready to hear more story!*
 

Dormouse

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This is funny, I've been drawing these characters, too...

Though mine are a bit goofier looking, I always end up drawing children with oddly shaped faces.

It's gonna be interesting to see how we each picture these kids. I love character design... :)
 

Anthile

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I'm especially tempted to do this when I have conflicting ideas and feel that expressing that conflict in the open, just as it is without clashing them together, for the forum to see, would yield the best explanation of my thoughts on the matter.

People do this sort of thing all the time, though perhaps usually to a smaller extent. It's where the phrase "on the other hand" comes from.

If you want to be more explicit about where the conflicting ideas are coming from, go ahead. I like getting to see other people's thought processes.
 

Dormouse

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Niprocess.jpg


Ni... Working on it. My general lopsidedness isn't so bad in this one. :rolleyes:

P.S. How does one put the spoiler to use?

Edit: Here's Se.

Seprocess.jpg
 

Adymus

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Dormous and Auburn, those are both really bad ass drawings of Ni.

However, not be overly critical, there is a certain look in an Ni dominant's eyes that I am not really seeing on these. Yours both have kind of a worrying look, which resembles Fi more than it does Ni.
Ni doms have this cunning and piercing look in their eye, that looks like they always either know what is going on, or they will soon have it all figured out.

Here is an okay example of what I mean:
sigourney-weaver-1.jpg

Sigourney-Weaver9.jpg

Sigourney Weaver: INTJ
even when she is smiling she still has the "Seeing you from a 1,000 leagues in the depths of my mind" look
nicole-kidman-000a.jpg

Nicole Kidman (INFJ)



Edit: And Se looks perfect. ^_^
 

Dormouse

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Thanks. :p I'm thinking of drafting up sketches of all of them... It's much fun.

And you're right about Ni... I think I might be able to change the look simply by rotating the eyebrows a bit, but not sure. I might actually have to change the shape of the eye itself. If it comes to that I might just start over, altering faces is a bit of a pain. And I need practice drawing cowls. :rolleyes:

Edit: Here's the change. I'm not sure if it works... Makes her seem a tad more determined, at the least. What say you?

Niface.jpg
 

Dormouse

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How's this? It still kinda bothers me, I might have to move the eyes up a bit for it to look right.

Niface-1.jpg


Also, Fe? Not sure if this strikes the right cord.

Feprocess.jpg



Edit: Here's Ti, attempt 1. I sorta like it... Tell me what you think.

Tiprocess.jpg


Cuz Asian children are smarter... I kid, it just turned out that way.
 

Reverse Transcriptase

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Nicole Kidman (INFJ)
What??? I adored Nicole Kidman, and now you say she's INFJ? Fucking hell!!! A type I cannot stand. My crush for her just died...

Ne = Female, 11 years old. Quite comical with her random comments. Isn't afraid to be embarrassed in front of others and is very approachable, jolly and playful.

Si = Male, 8 years old. A bookworm. He spends his free time reading. Sometimes he randomly spits out facts, often irrelevant, if another thought reminds him of it. This sometimes annoys the others.

Se = Male, 6 years old. The youngest and most out-of-control of them all. Fi is constantly chasing after him to make sure he doesn't get hurt, or treating his wounds when he tries one of his many stunts. Still, he usually manages to brighten up the atmosphere when his more melancholy siblings have a dark cloud over them.
I'm not totally caught up with the story, but I felt like Ne was a male and that Se & Si were of pretty ambiguous gender. It is kinda odd that you had Ts & Ses be male and Ns & Fs be female.... but whatever, it's cool.

I'll go get caught up now
 

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@KT-397 if you guys thinks that it is too different or crazy or not-what-this-story-was-meant-to-be then I'll be happy to toss it out.

But every story needs a villain, right? I felt that the Reavers were just too faceless.

Just one favor to ask: If we do keep KT-397, then can I have one more post with him by myself before you guys start writing him directly?
 

Ashenstar

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I'm really enjoying this little project of you few who have contributed to the story. I will continue to quietly observe it.

Rt, I agree that of course a villain would add some dimension to the story, however your post was a wee bit...... out of place? Too soon? I found it slightly ... jarring? Perhaps that is just because your style is quite a bit different, isn't that kinda the point though? ;)

*leaves to reread*

Well..... hmmm.. upon reading it again... it actually seems an almost appropriate spot to break away from the characters and switch to the "other side".


And SERIOUSLY.....Nicole Kidman!??
I used to love her face but I now see her and believe her to be one of the scariest "attractive" people in existence. Her face.... is so... frozen.. and just... so overly "perfect" and doll like. Her face scares me.
 

Dormouse

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Villains are always fun. My question is, what's the purpose of the robots? Kill the humans, or capture them? (I'm under the impression it's kill.)

Secondly, how many people are left in St Jung? What is this other group they're hoping to meet up with? A bunch or enneagram people? ;) lol
 

Kuu

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*twitches incontrollably*

As much as I love a robots-killing-humans-post-apocalyptic-cyberpunk story where the US is dead, WTF is this villain (for how long?) nonsense? The protagonists should be their own worst enemies... nothing else is necessary. If it is a psychological story, it is in the characters relationship to each others, and to themselves, where the emphasis must be....

I mean, are you seriously going with the "group of absurdly competent orphan 10 year olds fight evil (giant?) robot empire" story? *groan*

And... Saint Jung..? *twitch*



*Several kittens were harmed in the creation of this post*
People, think of the kittens :cat:

Edit: nevermind the unpleasable Kuu and her impossible high standards.
Edit 2: Ehh forgot to make these comments in my fury: I think Adaire's ideas are great. I also liked the plot possibilities of incest like Ore said... but whatever.
 

Reverse Transcriptase

"you're a poet whether you like it or not"
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(warning mods, this might be a triple-post... the forum made my first two posts go to moderator approval)

lol, I was already under the impression that the story was pretty absurd.

I mean, are you seriously going with the "group of absurdly competent orphan 10 year olds"
This was Auburn/Adymus/Cog 's idea, not mine. I was shocked to hear that they were kids and orphans! I'm just staying true to what has already been written.
fight evil (giant?) robot empire " story? For shame.
There were robots chasing the kids, the Reavers. The implication is that they're already fighting an evil robot empire! I mean, what are the Reavers if they are not the soldiers of an evil robot empire?

My style is definitely a change, but I felt that the thing they were running from was too cloud-like, not clear enough. Like they were fighting a fog. I just gave some definition to their enemy, all the pieces were already there.

Saint Jung, come on you know you love it. He loves kittens!

(and, actually, in the end, I only care about Auburn, Adymus and Cog's opinion about if my portion should stay or go.)
 

Auburn

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Dormouse - Those are amazing! I think you got Se, Fe and Ti spot-on. And your Ni, after Adymus' suggestions, does represent Ni better than mines. You've got a nice talent. =]

Kuu & RT - I agree with Kuu that the focus of the story should be the psychology of the cognitive functions interacting with each other. But a bit of plot development and background info couldn't hurt. =]

Also, prodigy children are gold for a storyline.

Anthile - Woah. That's an interesting idea. So maybe their enemies could be their devilish selves? What I mean is like, their enemies would be the same functions as them, but expressed as a devilish* function?

*Devilish Functions being the antagonist of someone's dominant, their eighth function. Usually this function is only expressed in times of extreme stress, and expresses itself in a very negative and dangerous way.


And don't hurt teh kittens!!!! :(
 

Dormouse

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Auburn - Thanks. I haven't had anything good to draw in ages, this is a wonderful outlet. :)

Kuu/RT - Aww, cliches are fun. And not necessarily bad, if properly handled. And considering the world they're living in, it seems likely that anyone aged would be killed off, and children would have to mature faster to survive. Plus they're small enough to be good at hiding in rubble...

Anthile - THAT IDEA IS FULL OF WIN.
 

Kuu

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RT: I wasn't saying it was all your idea, the *twitch* factor just hadn't reached a certain level to make me do a boo boo poo slinging post.

There were robots chasing the kids, the Reavers. The implication is that they're already fighting an evil robot empire! I mean, what are the Reavers if they are not the soldiers of an evil robot empire?

My style is definitely a change, but I felt that the thing they were running from was too cloud-like, not clear enough. Like they were fighting a fog. I just gave some definition to their enemy, all the pieces were already there.

What's wrong with the fog? Isn't faceless, unexplainable, perhaps even absurd danger more fearsome and abhorrent (and interesting) than the clearly comprehensible (not to mention overdone)?? I for one, would rather have them running without ever really knowing what it is they're running from, uncertain even if they should be running at all. I believe this would allow room for much more interesting scenarios... the mind is much more terrifying than reality, and what is this thread if not an exploration into unbalanced minds? That they are running from *something* real is only just a barely important backdrop to the actual issue which is the battle within and between themselves :storks:

Also, prodigy children are gold for a storyline.

Prodigy children are one of those loathsome tropes that only on the rarest of occasions add any real value to the stories they are woven into. Children are slapped into fiction just as pointlessly, ridiculously and gratuitously as most sex scenes.


Anthile's idea would be great... if you want to spell it all out and be black-n-white...


@Dormouse : Tropes will be tropes, and its impossible to avoid them. I just think the original idea of the thread has so much potential and it would be a shame to squander it on ..... that.



*takes the kittens hostage*
NOW, COMPLY TO MY DEMANDS OR I WILL START KILLING KITTENS, ONE FOR EVERY HOUR!*
 

Dormouse

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Children in fiction isn't a bad thing in and of itself, the problem is that any author/director will use them to cater to a younger audience. And provide no believable explanation for their skill or whatever.

In post-apocalyptic/warlike situations, though, it's quite possible there would be some ragtag bands of orphans surviving off scraps. Like I said before, children are better at hiding.

And I love evil counterparts... It just adds something. Alternatively, we could just have them become more and more evil as the story progresses, eventually completely becoming their alternate identities.
 

Kuu

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In post-apocalyptic/warlike situations, though, it's quite possible there would be some ragtag bands of orphans surviving off scraps. Like I said before, children are better at hiding.

Is this a "the horrors of war and oh the poor innocent children" story...? Does using that as a background setting give any added strength to the intended purpose, or is it derivative and irrelevant? It seems to me more like arbitrary author appeal than anything else...


I have more things to say about the whole children deal, but... oh well, enough of me whining. It's impossible to satisfy everyone, of course... To the Kuumobile!
 
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