Depressed? It may be because of your porn addiction.

[ProxyAmenRa]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU&feature=player_embedded

 

[Lot]

Very interesting.
What's your take on it?
Do you think there is such a thing as porn addiction?

*I'm going to be rather open about this. So if you don't care to know don't read*

I know, that when I abuse porn, I feel like shit. Not just from any self guilting; it does happen. I don't have confidence and my temper is short. My delusions come back, and I get very depressed. This would be spurring from at least a 5 hours a week habit. Maybe even 3 times a day, and not like one video, but around 1 hour each time. There was a time when I went 3 months sober form it, and I felt great. Sadly I'm not there anymore.

*I'm not saying that all porn users are addicts or abuse it.*

 

[NinjaSurfer]

maybe TED should work on a worthy cause, like nationwide legalization of brothels

 

[ProxyAmenRa]

maybe TED should work on a worthy cause, like nationwide legalization of brothels

I'm all for this. You got to pay to get it anyway...

---

The last time I watch anything to do with porn would have been a movie where a character was watching porn. o_O

I should watch more porn.

 

[Proletar]

ctrl + shift + N.


No but seriously, this is an interesting perspective. But is everyone really addicted?

He mensions that he couldn't find a control-group since everyone used pornography, but that doesn't mean that everyone uses it to an unhealthy degree. The same applies for those who quit, his 'missing control group'. They were obviously not users, but addicts.

So he really doesn't have loads of results to show. He proved that:

*Everyone (almost) uses pornography.
*There are addicts.
*Addicts get better when they quit.


So where does that leave us? Nowhere.

 

[ProxyAmenRa]

Pretty much.

 

[Darby]

I do it once every day or so, on top of whenever I get to have sex (2-3 times a week). I'm 20, and to be honest I don't really think I have any of those symptoms. If I didn't do it that often, I'd be so horny every time I did have sex I wouldn't last more than a couple of minutes.

I've never been a super social person, although it's true I'm shit at talking to girls, it has a lot to do with the fact that I'm choosing not to objectify them, and I'm removing sexual feelings from myself when I speak to them. Part of it is that I have watched just about every form of legal porn out there, and now the shock value bores me, I prefer real people, and so although I use porn, it's not "about the porn" for me. It's about getting the sexual tension out so I can go live my life horny free.

 

[skip]

He mensions that he couldn't find a control-group since everyone used pornography

No, they don't.

 

[NinjaSurfer]

 

[Proletar]

No, they don't.

No, he didn't.

(Yes, he didn't? No, they do? Yes, they do? Confusing. Anyway, he couldn't find a control group.)

 

[BigApplePi]

Comments.

1. ANY addiction is troublesome because they control you, not you them. Cures are: talk about it with others, quit cold turkey, take up another hobby. If you resume, think about it when not doing it and plan if and how to control it.
2. Porn sex is fantasy sensually except for the particular part of the body involved. Sex with a partner brings things unavailable by porn: touching, kissing, body contact, memories, social exchange.
3. Experiment to try: Try masturbating from a zen POV. That is, face a white blank wall and keep your mind blank. Whether successful or not, ask yourself what is the difference? Can you analyze this difference? (I'm not sure of the answer here.)
4. Shyness or the unavailability of a partner is a SEPARATE issue. I take that back. There is an overlap on the sex part, but that's not my point.
5. Like the video says, quitting means you can do other things and enjoy them more.

 

[RedN]

I think if youre a porn addict youve seen the... extreme side of porn, then clearly youd start wanting to do those things. but even if you have a wife or hubby, you may not get it... so clearly you can become depressed coz youre not getting what you want... and the more you see, and teh less you get the more it builds up unless you get a human fuc* doll and release all yer frustrations on him/her

 

[pjoa09]

so.... imagination?

 

[Hadoblado]

This was one of the more interesting talks I've seen, thanks for sharing.

I actually take this more in stride for my combined internet addiction, including gaming, facebook, youtube, this forum, and the occasional extreme DP interracial.

 

[kantor1003]

I completely stopped looking at pornographic material after seeing this (not something I'll be missing, I think). I don't know whether there has been any changes due to cessation of watching said material, but things that have changed that I'm aware of is this:
- I've been picking up math
- Reading more than I used to
- Finding more pleasure in everyday activities in general (I think)
- More appreciative and fascinated by nature and it's inhabitants
- Increased empathy for everyone and our common struggle (or lack thereof) that is existence
- More appreciative of other viewpoints

(all of this could of course be placebo, or an error of judgement on my part. As far as internal processes are concerned, it's very hard to discern myself now compared to myself one month ago)

I tried lsd shortly before I stopped watching porn, so I guess that could also have played some part. After all, behavioral- and internal changes are frequently reported after having had a psychedelic experience.

If any of you have quit watching anything pornographic I would be interested to know what kind of changes, if any, you have experienced.

 

[ProxyAmenRa]

I completely stopped looking at pornographic material after seeing this (not something I'll be missing, I think). I don't know whether there has been any changes due to cessation of watching said material, but things that have changed that I'm aware of is this:
- I've been picking up math
- Reading more than I used to
- Finding more pleasure in everyday activities in general (I think)
- More appreciative and fascinated by nature and it's inhabitants
- Increased empathy for everyone and our common struggle (or lack thereof) that is existence
- More appreciative of other viewpoints

(all of this could of course be placebo, or an error of judgement on my part. As far as internal processes are concerned, it's very hard to discern myself now compared to myself one month ago)

I tried lsd shortly before I stopped watching porn, so I guess that could also have played some part. After all, behavioral- and internal changes are frequently reported after having had a psychedelic experience.

If any of you have quit watching anything pornographic I would be interested to know what kind of changes, if any, you have experienced.

Were you using it as a substitute for human interaction?

 

[Moocow]

I completely stopped looking at pornographic material after seeing this (not something I'll be missing, I think). I don't know whether there has been any changes due to cessation of watching said material, but things that have changed that I'm aware of is this:
- I've been picking up math
- Reading more than I used to
- Finding more pleasure in everyday activities in general (I think)
- More appreciative and fascinated by nature and it's inhabitants
- Increased empathy for everyone and our common struggle (or lack thereof) that is existence
- More appreciative of other viewpoints

(all of this could of course be placebo, or an error of judgement on my part. As far as internal processes are concerned, it's very hard to discern myself now compared to myself one month ago)

I tried lsd shortly before I stopped watching porn, so I guess that could also have played some part. After all, behavioral- and internal changes are frequently reported after having had a psychedelic experience.

If any of you have quit watching anything pornographic I would be interested to know what kind of changes, if any, you have experienced.

I would bet pretty confidently that it was the LSD.

 

[kantor1003]

Were you using it as a substitute for human interaction?

I'm not sure, but I don't think so. It would make a poor substitution indeed. Mostly, I think it was just a temporary cure to a physio-psychological desire, but this is perhaps an oversimplification. It's hard to map out eroticism, it's psychological "roots" and what exactly constitutes what one would normally only limit to "sexual desire", therefore it's hard for me to say exactly what I was using it for. To know that I would have to know exactly what I desired. I don't know myself that well and I don't think I have the linguistic capacity to know myself that well either.
To make it easier on myself, I just answer that it's use, in addition to cure a purely instinctive desire, was a result of boredom and a lack of females by which to explore with.
By exploring, I don't mean something purely sensuous of course - that is the kind of exploration one can do with almost any female - what I'm looking for is of a more spiritual character, if one can call it that. Interesting things can happen to the mind when engaged in close intimacy. Unfortunately, I haven't found a woman where I could get away from being conscious only of myself and only in satisfying her and my physical desire - to put it simply, unable to explain otherwise, I haven't found anyone with whom I could "let go".

Anyway, spending time on a forum such as this is a more overt form of human interaction substitution. Examining the effects of forum participation cessation would be an interesting endeavor as well.

What do you use porn for, Proxy? If indeed you do.

I would bet pretty confidently that it was the LSD.

With regards to the last 3 mentioned changes, I would be pretty confident in agreeing with you.

 

[Proletar]

This was one of the more interesting talks I've seen, thanks for sharing.

I actually take this more in stride for my combined internet addiction, including gaming, facebook, youtube, this forum, and the occasional extreme DP interracial.

Now this is interesting.


I think that this internet-life, the life of a 10second attention-span, is what really dehumanizes us.

With immediate stimulation wherever we look, it's hard to really develop thinking or feeling on a deeper level. And if we are troubled by something, it's very easy to escape into new sensations and stimulations instead of dealing with it. Like spending most of your waking life at a vast virtual zoo, with new amazing animals everywhere we look.

And where does it leave us? Well, we probably have a more developed sense of humour and probably know a little about many things, but are we really inversing ourselves in the great mysteries of life? I hear people say that life is pretty much bullshit, but I don't think that's true. I think we are meant to explore, to reach beyond our comfort-zone. But how can we do that when the comfort-zone is so god damn comfortable?


I think that pornography or facebook is fine, just as long as you get your time to rewind and get all the bullshit of the real world out of your head maybe once a week or so.

 

[Namesmith]

But one part of me is VERY happy!

 

[Milo]

I have more energy
No more depression
Way less anxiety (still dropping)
Now my vinegar stokes are much more like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USIR-UlwcWM

 

[Milo]

I have more energy
No more depression
Way less anxiety (still dropping)
Now my vinegar stokes are much more like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USIR-UlwcWM

Hahaha

 

[doncarlzone]

Now this is interesting.


I think that this internet-life, the life of a 10second attention-span, is what really dehumanizes us.

With immediate stimulation wherever we look, it's hard to really develop thinking or feeling on a deeper level. And if we are troubled by something, it's very easy to escape into new sensations and stimulations instead of dealing with it. Like spending most of your waking life at a vast virtual zoo, with new amazing animals everywhere we look.

And where does it leave us? Well, we probably have a more developed sense of humour and probably know a little about many things, but are we really inversing ourselves in the great mysteries of life? I hear people say that life is pretty much bullshit, but I don't think that's true. I think we are meant to explore, to reach beyond our comfort-zone. But how can we do that when the comfort-zone is so god damn comfortable?


I think that pornography or facebook is fine, just as long as you get your time to rewind and get all the bullshit of the real world out of your head maybe once a week or so.

Very interesting. However, I think there is a huge psychological difference between being overstimulated by porn as opposed to other internet activities such as watching TV series/facebook.

We know that desensitization is a byproduct of overstimulation but when does it become an addiction? And does it have to be an addiction to produce negative psychological side-effects?

For instance, I am very desensitized to music and I have several music "fetishes", probably to the equivalent of retro anal midget porn of some sort. I just like to be moved by music which mainstream can't, anymore. However, that just makes me a person with a good taste in music.

The nature of desensitization and taste is probably very similar but the psychological side-effects are vastly different as explained in the video.

I will quit today to see what happens. Thanks for sharing.

 

[addictedartist]

The law of conservation of energy, first formulated in the nineteenth century, is a law of physics. It states that the total amount of energy in an isolated system remains constant over time. The total energy is said to be conserved over time. For an isolated system, this law means that energy can change its location within the system, and that it can change form within the system, for instance chemical energy can become kinetic energy, but that energy can be neither created nor destroyed.

 

[Milo]

The law of conservation of energy, first formulated in the nineteenth century, is a law of physics. It states that the total amount of energy in an isolated system remains constant over time. The total energy is said to be conserved over time. For an isolated system, this law means that energy can change its location within the system, and that it can change form within the system, for instance chemical energy can become kinetic energy, but that energy can be neither created nor destroyed.

Okay? I think we all knew that. Do you have a point? Lol.

 

[readhotchili]

My brother is a recovering porn addict under the GreatnessAhead therapy program and though his family are having better days recently than what they had to go through in the past years, I've seen how real porn addiction is. It almost ruined my brother's marriage and nearly destroyed his family. His wife was traumatized (betrayal trauma) and our mom had frequent breakdowns which led to anxiety. It was the most challenging battle that our family had to go through. It was very depressing. He told us he was depressed and unhappy, thus giving in to porn.