Can I ask what qualities showed that your parent was high in N?
Aha..better question was what WASN'T, so I'm going use your examples and give some contrast.
I think due to the lack of N there was always an over-focus on materialism/practicality to the point where it pushed me to try and become independent earlier on in my life than some of my peers so I could not only meet her expectation of what successful would be
Practicality was never stressed. Everyone worked full time, and was very busy--what was impressed on me the most was doing something wrong when you know how to do it right is unacceptable. I find as I compare my own experiences growing up to others, the skills of creating a steady life for yourself that were emphasized and taught in most of their homes was not in mine. I wasn't disciplined as much for things most other's would be (more standard things like getting angry, or the way I spoke) but I was held accountable for doing anything less than my best. She was never mean about it, but my mom (the INFJ) would never tell me "what a good job I did" if I did not do a good job. And if it were my best, she would pat me on the shoulder and say, "Well. Now you know what you need to work on."
My mother was always extremely crafty, artistic, and resourceful, with an obligation to care for everyone to the point of exhaustion, then withdraw completely without notice. She was extremely anti-change and the epiphany of a homebody, though the homebody aspect is likely what we have in common most. While she was far from a "tiger mom", she was very conservative when it came to beginning to understand necessary socialization/lifestyle needs (partying, doing new things with friends back when school made that stuff easier) until I garnered enough assertiveness independently to stop caring about some of her dogma that was holding me back from actualizing my potential via mental liberation, etc.
The obligation part is true, but instead of withdrawing, mine would become...angry. She'd reach limits without knowing it because there was still things she needed or wanted to do. She was not a homebody at all, and was either over-stressed to the point of wrecking her mental and physical health, or bored. There is no in-between.
My mom has always struggled with appearances. She isn't a shut-in or hermit, and she certain likes being social, but she gets disgusted with people who work more on promoting themselves than actually working, and she can't imagine doing this herself. This has actually caused her a lot of grief in the workplace...just by troubleshooting problems that need to be addressed, she's come across as "calling out" other people and being aggressive. Despite being the most hard working person I've ever met, her career has been tragic due to men with fragile egos feeling the need to "put her in her place," when no offense was ever met. She literally has PTSD due to the emotional abuse she's gone through. I've often wished she was better at social correctness and self-preservation, but she cares way too much about her cause and her work than trying to "save her own ass" and letting the oversensitive, male higher-ups make fatal errors.
Sorry, just something I get very angry about...ANYWAY, the point is social correctness was never stressed as much from her. She had me do more social things when I was a young child of course (as most parents do), but when I was in high school, the most she did was bemoan that I didn't care about school dances. (I can't imagine anything worse). She let me be in the social scene, as long as she understood everything going on. She was quite...aggressive...if she didn't understand something, (a behavior, or how much I was actually working as opposed to reading books), and would be relentless until she did.
When it comes to practicing, (I am a musician), I can relate more to what you've relayed. If I wasn't practicing enough to her, she would psych me out by saying I didn't deserve to play, etc. By the time I was in high school, and then auditioning, the majority of "reminders to practice" had all ceased. She just made it clear to me that I wouldn't get something if my output didn't match my goals. Now I'm the one freaking out if I didn't practice enough! (Like right now)
I do this with some family that are close, I think once every month or two months. But with people I've known for, say, less than 2 years, I don't know if I could muster up that courage to have a phone conversation unless they initially started calling me first on an ongoing basis. And I'd have to -reaaaaallly- like them for me to let them call me on an ongoing basis in the first place.
You got me there! That is fair, I would also not just call someone I hadn't spoken to in two years. I'd start with text or email. And that takes too much effort, so why bother? Let life run it's course.
Nice to meet you lolzcry 
