Abstaining from masturbation...

[Sixup]

Does anyone actually do this?

I tried for a while before, and then I actually lost sex drive. Boners wouldn't happen. Then once I finally gave in, it was mount saint helens. So I see masturbation as a use it or lose it thing. Not overdoing it. Maybe 20-35 times a week. Ideally. Just to keep the machinery working.

 

[Cheeseumpuffs]

Maybe 20-35 times a week. Ideally.

Do you actually masturbate 3-5 times a day?

That seems wildly excessive, to me.

Edit: And, to answer your question, no, I don't abstain from masturbating. I do limit myself somewhat, though, as it's a hard to go all out when you share a room with another person. Once or twice every couple/few days is plenty, for me.

 

[QuickTwist]

Once a week for me.

You're welcome world.

 

[Seteleechete]

I find it really fun fantazising and having a boner but abstaining from actually masturbating. This way the fantasy can go on for hours on end. Unfortunately it does take some mental will to abstain. I really wish I didn't know how to masturbate like my first year of puberty. It was extremely pleasant just lying in bed for hours with a boner without knowing what masturbation was... Now I have to make an active effort to resist the temptation.

 

[Yellow]

It's my observation (on my phone, so I'm not looking up whether I'm right or just living in a bubble) that long periods of abstinence (from sex or masturbation) are associated with a lower sex drive. I don't know if a low sex drive allows one to engage in abstinence, or if abstinence lowers the drive, but there looks to be a relationship.

So if you want to reduce your "youthful vitality", or be compatible with asexual or low sex-drive partners, long periods of abstinence are the way to go.

Also, doesn't abstinence increase your odds of developing prostate cancer or something like that?

 

[Grayman]

I read somewhere that if you masturbate every day or more your chance of cancer goes up 75%. Masturbating less than once a month is also bad. The sweet spot that reduces cancer is once a week.

 

[Analyzer]

20-35 times a week? shit

but really, I don't think it matters unless its effecting your personal life like anything else. Like showing up late or distracts you from things you "should" be doing.

 

[Lot]

I stopped masturbating as often as I used to. I had a porn problem. It was killing my motivation and my anxiety, specifically with women, was getting bad. I had (sometimes still have) little desire to leave the house, and I was even late to work several times, and growing in number, just because I was busy wanking.

I've had to cut back several times in my life. It's been my go to when I'm under a lot of stress and want detach. It also became a replacement for human interaction, very similar to why I abused marijuana. The escape is never enough and lead to more and more use. Which leads me down very dark pornographic roads, and effects how I view other human beings. Probably more of an effect of porn, though.

It's not uncommon for men that masturbate too much to completely flatline for a few weeks to a month if they quit doing it. I actually started getting prostate issues at the age of 23. I've found direct correlation between prostate flare ups and frequent masturbation. But that's probably just me. So I find taking breaks and trying not to do it every day to be helpful. The extra testosterone is worth it alone. Also, wet dreams are fantastic when you can't get laid.

 

[Tannhauser]

I tried this a couple of years ago, when I was 23. What happened was: after a week or so I began jizzing in my sleep every goddamn night.

 

[Sixup]

Lol. Semitrolling about the 30 times a week. Probably average like 3x a week.

Definitely avoid porn though. I realized that whenever I watch porn, even moderately, boners would be slower and weaker when with real women.

 

[Sinny91]

It's my observation (on my phone, so I'm not looking up whether I'm right or just living in a bubble) that long periods of abstinence (from sex or masturbation) are associated with a lower sex drive. I don't know if a low sex drive allows one to engage in abstinence, or if abstinence lowers the drive, but there looks to be a relationship.

So if you want to reduce your "youthful vitality", or be compatible with asexual or low sex-drive partners, long periods of abstinence are the way to go.

Also, doesn't abstinence increase your odds of developing prostate cancer or something like that?

I've been abstaining from sex.
Went almost 12 months a couple of years ago, then gave in.
Then abstained again, gave in after a month.
Then abstained again, or about 5 months, then gave in.
Been abstained since, but this abstinence is only partly planned.

I've been experimenting with the effects of 'Prana', Orgone, Bio Energy.
I want to explore more in depth, but I need a willing partner

On relation to your queries... drives always mid-high, hence me trying to harness and control it.

I don't understand how somebody, like Sete for example, is the opposite.

I'm in my 20s and I'm a Red Blooded female *shrugs*.

 

[Fukyo]

Elliot Roger abstained from masturbation too.

 

[Yellow]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8VXnvbc1c0

Edit: Fukyo: I like your new avatar.

 

[Pyropyro]

I read somewhere that if you masturbate every day or more your chance of cancer goes up 75%. Masturbating less than once a month is also bad. The sweet spot that reduces cancer is once a week.

What? nooooo!

*Dies from a billion different types of cancer*

 

[Tannhauser]

Apparently jerking off is more dangerous than smoking

 

[Yellow]

Yes. well, kind of. If you can jerk off while smoking, they cancel out.

 

[Deleted member 1424]

Yes. well, kind of. If you can jerk off while smoking, they cancel out.

Yellow. No. Just No.

You're only supposed to smoke after.

 

[Jennywocky]

Apparently jerking off is more dangerous than smoking

Yes. well, kind of. If you can jerk off while smoking, they cancel out.

If you start smoking while you're jerking off, maybe you should slow down....?

 

[Yellow]

I wanted to add a gif of masturbation causing smoking to rise (PG of course, one I had seen before at some point), so I Googled "smoking penis" (I clearly hadn't thought it through). Found this.

 

[Alias]

Interesting thread I guess. I noticed that Yellow posted Green Day's All By Myself, and I have to note that it's their creepiest song, at least to me.

 

[Sixup]

Is jacking off worse than jerking off?

 

[Sinny91]

Yellow. No. Just No.

You're only supposed to smoke after.

I've requested of a partner that we change positions so that I can skin up and smoke during.

Weed is always my priority.

 

[Grayman]

Masturbating for stress relief just went up in smoke.

 

[Brontosaurie]

Masturbating for stress relief just went up in smoke.

lol

 

[The Gopher]

I'm always smokin'

(For the INTJ's, I am implying I am smoking hot all the time. I am not implying that I smoke and\or am always on fire.)

 

[QuickTwist]

I'm always smokin'

(For the INTJ's, I am implying I am smoking hot all the time. I am not implying that I smoke and\or am always on fire.)

Yes, to all the INTJ's: something is on fire, that is for sure; like a caveman boy scout yo.

 

[Cheeseumpuffs]

Is jacking off worse than jerking off?

Depends. Worse in what sense?

From a comedy standpoint I'd say jacking is worse. For some reason, jerking off just sounds funnier to me.

In most other ways I think I prefer jacking of. I think I associate "jerk" with violent (and probably painful) tugging. The likes of which I certainly would not like to be directed towards my yankee doodle, if you know what I mean.

 

[Brontosaurie]

I'm always smokin'

(For the INTJ's, I am implying I am smoking hot all the time. I am not implying that I smoke and\or am always on fire.)

No. You're explicitly stating that.

 

[mu is mu]

Does anyone actually do this?

I tried for a while before, and then I actually lost sex drive. Boners wouldn't happen. Then once I finally gave in, it was mount saint helens. So I see masturbation as a use it or lose it thing. Not overdoing it. Maybe 20-35 times a week. Ideally. Just to keep the machinery working.

I resist it for religious and moral reasons.

For me masturbation was never a temptation or even a thought until I was almost 24. At that time masturbation led me down a dark road that I never could have imagined myself taking. I feel fortunate that I did not end up looking at pornography, although I did experience prostatitis. For me the ultimate resolution was to admit that I have a sex drive and begin the process of pursuing marriage, something that I had been avoiding for many reasons.

You should not ignore the negative experiences with masturbation that some people have reported in this thread or that others have reported in articles online. The idea that masturbation is completely healthy and completely harmless is simply nonsense. It can be very addictive and can lead to self-injury. Yes, there is a biological need to ejaculate on a fairly regular basis and avoiding this can create problems (we were made to have sex--additionally, wet dreams can help to address this), but this should not cause us to overlook all the negatives associated with masturbation.

Furthermore, masturbation could never replace real sex with your spouse. Sex is more than just animalistic release from sexual tension—although that’s certainly important. Masturbation does not understand this. The sexual encounter tends to have emotional and psychological consequences that reinforce your affection for the other person. Masturbation perverts this design. And masturbation relies so heavily on the imagination while real sex involves all of the senses.

Having a sex drive is not a crime, and failing to address it can lead to serious issues. I have very serious doubts that you will be able to completely abstain from masturbation. My advice to you will be the same as what my pastor said to me: Do your best to fend off masturbation while acknowledging that sex with a real woman who is your wife is the final answer for your sex drive.

There are all sorts of little steps you can take to resist masturbation. For me what I found was that living with others (instead of alone) was probably the most helpful step in resisting it. This is not an option for everyone.

Another very helpful step was to pay careful attention to my eyes. For a young single guy with no sexual outlet that step can be extremely difficult to follow at times, but as men our sex drives are largely visually catalyzed. This obviously means that pornography is well off-limits. And of course I want to be realistic and say that gender norms in this country combined with the heat of Louisiana result in young women dressing in a way that tends to drive the male sex drive crazy, despite how oblivious women tend to be of this.

The bottom line is that we are sexual beings living in a country with values and norms that do not understand human sexuality well. Licentious fashion norms, norms involved in delaying marriage, and even norms of sexual repression have consequences. This desynchronization creates real problems for real people.

Having said all this, good luck. There are plenty of good reasons out there to resist masturbation, although, again, I just don’t think it’s realistic to expect all of us to be able to completely abstain forever. Cue marriage--as well as the steps you will need to take to mature for that.

 

[Inquisitor]

I resist it for religious and moral reasons.

For me masturbation was never a temptation or even a thought until I was almost 24. At that time masturbation led me down a dark road that I never could have imagined myself taking. I feel fortunate that I did not end up looking at pornography, although I did experience prostatitis. For me the ultimate resolution was to admit that I have a sex drive and begin the process of pursuing marriage, something that I had been avoiding for many reasons.

You should not ignore the negative experiences with masturbation that some people have reported in this thread or that others have reported in articles online. The idea that masturbation is completely healthy and completely harmless is simply nonsense. It can be very addictive and can lead to self-injury. Yes, there is a biological need to ejaculate on a fairly regular basis and avoiding this can create problems (we were made to have sex), but this should not cause us to overlook all the negatives associated with masturbation.

Furthermore, masturbation could never replace real sex with your spouse. Sex is more than just animalistic release from sexual tension—although that’s certainly important. Masturbation does not understand this. The sexual encounter tends to have emotional and psychological consequences that reinforce your affection for the other person. Masturbation perverts this design. And masturbation relies so heavily on the imagination while real sex involves all of the senses.

Having a sex drive is not a crime, and failing to address it can lead to serious issues. I have very serious doubts that you will be able to completely abstain from masturbation. My advice to you will be the same as what my pastor said to me: Do your best to fend off masturbation while acknowledging that sex with a real woman who is your wife is the final answer for your sex drive.

There are all sorts of little steps you can take to resist masturbation. For me what I found was that living with others (instead of alone) was probably the most helpful step in resisting it. This is not an option for everyone.

Another very helpful step was to pay careful attention to my eyes. For a young single guy with no sexual outlet that step can be extremely difficult to follow at times, but as men our sex drives are largely visually catalyzed. This obviously means that pornography is well off-limits. And of course I want to be realistic and say that gender norms in this country combined with the heat of Louisiana result in young women dressing in a way that tends to drive the male sex drive crazy, despite how oblivious women tend to be of this.

The bottom line is that we are sexual beings living in a country with values and norms that do not understand human sexuality well. Licentious fashion norms, norms involved in delaying marriage, and even norms of sexual repression have consequences. This desynchronization creates real problems for real people.

Having said all this, good luck. There are plenty of good reasons out there to resist masturbation, although, again, I just don’t think it’s realistic to expect all of us to be able to completely abstain forever. Cue marriage--as well as the steps you will need to take to mature for that.

+1

I would add that while the urge to ejaculate is undeniable for almost all men, it's not particularly healthy. The two oldest medical traditions (Ayurveda and Chinese medicine) on the planet advocate moderation, and ejaculation drains the body of semen, which is extremely costly to manufacture in the sense that it takes roughly ~30 days for a very tiny fraction of the elements in the food that you eat to find its way into semen.

Repressing sexuality is obviously not healthy, but all spiritual masters have been celibate. There's a very good reason for this. W/o abstinence, they never would have had the willpower and strength to be able transform themselves. For all lay people, masturbation is 100% bad. Both Ayurveda and CM indicate as much. Sex is ok though...in moderation and only with someone you love.

There's nothing fundamentally wrong or unhealthy about celibacy though. You just have to redirect that extra energy in productive ways.

 

[Tannhauser]

I feel fortunate that I did not end up looking at pornography, although I did experience prostatitis.

That's a hilarious sentence.

The original tenet of Christianity is that man is a sick animal and the only way to salvation is joining the institution. I like that the modern way is a slight reconfiguration of that tenet: now some of his drives are healthy after all.

 

[nanook]

I guess the negative impact of masturbation is relative to age and individual hormonal configuration. For me at least, becoming aware of how draining masturbation is to a certain subtle mental and psychological energy or state coincided with age. I try to avoid it as long as i can get myself to do so. I wonder in how far the drain is also relative to behavior though. I have noticed that masturbating after long abstinence would sometimes cause a severe and immediate break down of my wellbeing. I don't experience this, when i masturbate more frequently. There might be some hormonal adaption that can partially upregulate the mood in the presence of regular sexual depletion, an adaption which does not occur, when sexual depletion has not occurred in a long while. There might be different interpretations ....

However since the ladies don't like me, i have not managed to categorically give up porn yet, in other words the sight of naked women. I have limited exposure to porn to a few minutes on the rare occasion i decide to masturbate. No more browsing of archives and downloading huge reserves that would last for years of daily masturbation. I wish i could just delete urls like empflix from my brain *g*

I have to say i am extremely opposed to any attempts of shaming male sexuality though. Be it in the interest of society, aka religion or in the interest of women who are provider-shaming (unattractive/beta/omega men, those who are stuck with porn, are only allowed to have a desire to serve women, not a desire in sexuality approaching them, because their sexuality is interpreted as predatory whereas attractive men who actually approach women sexually are not perceived as predatory). I must reserve the right to watch all the porn on the internet. I can manage my energy however i like and porn stars are not victims, they have the most awesome job while i am unemployed and can't afford a smartphone with tinder on it or paying for drinks.

 

[emmabobary]

I find it really fun fantazising and having a boner but abstaining from actually masturbating. This way the fantasy can go on for hours on end. Unfortunately it does take some mental will to abstain. I really wish I didn't know how to masturbate like my first year of puberty. It was extremely pleasant just lying in bed for hours with a boner without knowing what masturbation was... Now I have to make an active effort to resist the temptation.

That is so weird, yet so awkwardly cute at the time!

Well, I don´t believe in abstaining, I never felt the need to abstain, one shouldn´t had to make an effort to avoid pleasure.
But I guess we all have our own measure, and rythm; wich should be explored and respected.

Unlike Steleechete I remember my earlier explorations without the sensation of arousal, but with surprise. I was like: "Dude! did I have all these things since I was born? How come I never noticed? Does anyone else know about themselves? This is a great discovering! I should go tell everyone!"

...

 

[Sinny91]

Yea like, who was it that was dating by statistics?
That had predatory undertones, IMO.
DocSaladFingers perhaps?

 

[mu is mu]

That's a hilarious sentence.

The original tenet of Christianity is that man is a sick animal and the only way to salvation is joining the institution. I like that the modern way is a slight reconfiguration of that tenet: now some of his drives are healthy after all.

Are you interested in dialogue? We can do that elsewhere, if so. But I won't derail this thread. Some people really do want to stop masturbating, and not just for religious reasons.

I would have liked to see what your thoughts were with regard to the rest of my post. Your worldview is obviously different than mine, so it would have been helpful to see the topic of this thread depicted from your perspective.

 

[Tannhauser]

Are you interested in dialogue? We can do that elsewhere, if so. But I won't derail this thread. Some people really do want to stop masturbating, and not just for religious reasons.

I would have liked to see what your thoughts were with regard to the rest of my post. Your worldview is obviously different than mine, so it would have been helpful to see the topic of this thread depicted from your perspective.

I am not sure if I can provide any more thoughts on that. From what I can see, the underlying assumption of what you wrote is that sex within a monogamous contract is good, rubbing one out is bad. The question still remains: why? Because man has to be caged within some institution, whatever it may be? To me, that is anti-life.

I think impulse control is good. Living in a constant reaction to stimuli, sexual or not, conditions for a low quality life. But jerking off in itself is a genius thing. One just hast to remember that it is a reaction to stimulus, not meant to be a routine task or some hobby.

 

[Brontosaurie]

Well, I don´t believe in abstaining, I never felt the need to abstain, one shouldn´t had to make an effort to avoid pleasure.
But I guess we all have our own measure, and rythm; wich should be explored and respected.

Sometimes you have to abstain to not do it so much that it gets boring. It can become like an addiction. Maybe not so common for women.

 

[Sixup]

I dunno but my jizz regenerates plenty quickly. Definitely doesn't take a month. Shit after 3 days I'm like spiderman. I once went a whole month no-jerk. Fucking geyser. Maybe it takes longer for vegtards not consuming any cholesterol. I guess if that's what you need for spiritual enlightenment...

 

[Yellow]

I dunno but my jizz regenerates plenty quickly. Definitely doesn't take a month. Shit after 3 days I'm like spiderman. I once went a whole month no-jerk. Fucking geyser. Maybe it takes longer for vegtards not consuming any cholesterol.

My favorite quote in forever.

 

[Jennywocky]

I'd pay to see him swing across Central Avenue on it...

 

[groovytaxi98]

lol it took me four years to orgasm successfully... I think I was scared of climaxing or something, cause the thought of anything but urine shooting through there sounded pain inducing. But the first time I did, It felt otherworldly... I then masturbated at least 50 times until the end of the week (12 on the first day), almost as if I couldn't believe I could actually do it. Now it's usually around 2-3 times every day or two. (But I never enjoy it anymore at all. It simply makes me feel... okay. I honestly don't even feel sexually aroused at all anymore when I orgasm... it's just like sneezing now.)

 

[Puffy]

Spoiler

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0kJHQpvgB8

I experimented with abstinence for months at a time as a means of giving up pornography a few years ago, and to test out some of the Ayurvedic type theories Inquisitor mentioned about it improving concentration, self-control, productivity, etc. (I think it's possible that sexual desire can get sublimated or re-directed into different kinds of productivity through abstinence, but I've only noticed subtle effects so far to pin-point it to that specifically.)

I've noticed since then that the number of times I feel a need to masturbate is naturally significantly less though. I've never masturbated as a habit more than once daily, but these days I find I only have the desire to do so about twice a month basically in keeping with the nocturnal emission cycle (that would occur if you went totally abstinent.)

I'd say that my relationship to masturbation prior to practicing abstinence felt more like an addiction and that the amount I did was unnecessary. These days it just feels like a part of the bodies natural cycles that happens when it needs to, it doesn't feel like suppression or repression, and that I now make more explorative and tend to enjoy more when I do given its rarity. I've become more sensitive to my body as a result, but this might also be the result of other practices I've done in the same time.

I think my current habits are healthy, but I'm unsure if I think permanent abstinence is.

Other factors:

1. In the same time I've consciously cut down a lot on the time I spend with modern media -- film, tv, games, internet. I think this is a significant factor given how sexualised a lot of modern media is (like wanting a glass of coca-cola after seeing an advertisement.)
2. I think my sex-drive is lower than most males my age.

 

[al.otakupunk]

I don't abstain per se... I just don't get aroused easily. Also, it is really difficult to masturbate when you don't live alone... in my teens I was a latch-key kid, so I did it around 3-4 times a week maybe (probably more), but now I'm down to 1-2 if I'm lucky.
Weirdly enough, as I've gotten older, I've been a lot less creative (drawing less, etc.), and this seems correlated with the drop in masturbation... is that just me?

Sent from my SM-G360P using Tapatalk

 

[QuickTwist]

when I saw you talking about drawing... NVM...

 

[TheManBeyond]

Just jerk off

 

[QuickTwist]

Well, that's not exactly where I was going with it.. Anyways my quota has been filled already and I don't want to overdo anything. Getting obsessed with it can lead to a scary individual.

 

[bvanevery]

A lot of this thread reads as "too much information" to me, but on a couple points I felt compelled to comment. Lest the forces of a Sex Negative Culture plunge us all into eternal darkness.

Does anyone actually do this?

I don't abstain, and I think the idea is completely pointless. There have been various religious traditions that mystify it (Shaolin monks?) or demonize it. All just head space, mental inscription upon actual reality.

Having a sex drive is not a crime,

Masturbation is not a crime either. It is not a perversion of anything, go look at all the animal species that masturbate just fine and live to tell the tale. You claim it can cause injury; well, you'll need to demonstrate that. Won't take it on your say-so. I felt compelled to speak against the fear based reality you're trying to concoct for people. I think that's all you've got in this dept. "Fears."

or in the interest of women who are provider-shaming (unattractive/beta/omega men, those who are stuck with porn, are only allowed to have a desire to serve women, not a desire in sexuality approaching them, because their sexuality is interpreted as predatory whereas attractive men who actually approach women sexually are not perceived as predatory).

That's an interesting concept I hadn't run into before. Glad it's not my problem; wouldn't wish it on anyone.

 

[HDINTP]

I find it really fun fantazising and having a boner but abstaining from actually masturbating. This way the fantasy can go on for hours on end. Unfortunately it does take some mental will to abstain. I really wish I didn't know how to masturbate like my first year of puberty. It was extremely pleasant just lying in bed for hours with a boner without knowing what masturbation was... Now I have to make an active effort to resist the temptation.

This is also quite a problem for me at times. I mean it actually energizes you when you do not ejaculate...

 

[Reluctantly]

I find it really fun fantazising and having a boner but abstaining from actually masturbating. This way the fantasy can go on for hours on end. Unfortunately it does take some mental will to abstain. I really wish I didn't know how to masturbate like my first year of puberty. It was extremely pleasant just lying in bed for hours with a boner without knowing what masturbation was... Now I have to make an active effort to resist the temptation.

I bet you'd like wearing a chastity belt and being a sub, heh.