The INTPf High Court of Justice

[TheScornedReflex]

"The more cays you have the better the sweater is gonna be? I'm not sure I understand your case. Could you explain it further?"

Cays was a typo. On my phone. Replace Cays with cats and it will make sense. Plus, only the Judge has to understand my case. Mwahahaha!

 

[QuickTwist]

Where is Animekitty? I believe they could clear things up a bit.

 

[Jennywocky]

Cays was a typo. On my phone. Replace Cays with cats and it will make sense. Plus, only the Judge has to understand my case. Mwahahaha!

Case? Don't you mean "cays"?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Case? Don't you mean "cays"?

Yes.. Sorry mum.

 

[QuickTwist]

Stoner! Stoner! J/k

Seriously though what with the reference of sweaters? For srsly.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Stoner! Stoner! J/k

Seriously though what with the reference of sweaters? For srsly.

Uh oh. Jenny, we have confused the poor kid.

 

[Jennywocky]

Uh oh. Jenny, we have confused the poor kid.

I fear the boy's woolen mind is beginning to unravel.

If you tell the clerk that we found him that way, maybe they won't implement the, "You break it, you bought it!" rule.

 

[walfin]

You misunderstand. I don't want to sue anyone for too many cats, I want to make a law that there can't be too many cats.

1 cats: acceptable

Well, you have to sue someone to advance a novel point of law. Pick a defendant or many, you're spoilt for choice.

After considering the submissions of all the eminent courtroom audience, I hold that the thing to do is to call Animekitty to the stand. He is 1 cats. He is legion. He is anime.

Now, all we need are experts on cays, crocodiles and sweaters. On to another grand trial for the glory of the Court!

 

[Black Rose]

I think I have become the victim of a hate crime plus discrimination and striped of my basic liberties. Cats should be worshiped as gods not worn as clothing. I hereby demand trial by feather. Then we will know if justice has been served.

 

[walfin]

The judge got bored and decided to peruse the dusty old codexes of the court.

Actually, Rule B(I) allows for a petition to be made to the court without having to name any defendants (but that'd be boring wouldn't it?)

Also, he realises that he erred in fact and law in dismissing SpaceYeti's previous suit against BAP as BAP had admitted his guilt before the trial started *bows head in shame*.

Given the substantial injustice done to SpaceYeti, BAP is awarded to SpaceYeti as damages.

 

[Jennywocky]

Is that sum awarded as a lump or paid out in annual increments over twenty years?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I fear the boy's woolen mind is beginning to unravel.

If you tell the clerk that we found him that way, maybe they won't implement the, "You break it, you bought it!" rule.

Why do I have to tell the clerk?!


Just a thought, but do mind fucks count as rape?

 

[Jennywocky]

Just a thought, but do mind fucks count as rape?

..... I guess only if it's against your will. Literally.

 

[QuickTwist]

Your honor, I would like to make a reform of previous statement about cats, disregarding the confusion of cays.

I believe there is quit possible an exception to the rule of having more than 5 cats although this is just a representation of what would be too many cats. I believe it is up to the court to decide exactly how many cats is too many. I would make an exception from 5 cats to 10 in the event that there is a kittencabootle if any such case occurs. We have yet to define exactly how many cats is too many yet I believe because of religious background or other wise that we can be flexible with the term too many cats. I would certainly say that 25 cats, being exactly 5 kittencabootles in the case that it occurs gives ample room for 1 if not several individuals to have their own kittencabootle. I would like to state that cats may be counted as the amount of cats counted represented to an add sum from different individuals or collectively depending on the individual(s) involvement of used cats in relation to each other.



Walfin, do you have some sort of religious or otherwise background that you believe you are entitled to use in excess of 5 cats and what is your involvement If any to Animekittys use of cats? Surely it appears that 18 cats is far too many for one individual to have.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Your honor and almighty judginess.

I would like to sue this Ailurophobian, more commonly known as a Kolpophobian, for his xenophobic and elitist attitude towards pussy cats.. And sweaters.

Do we have a cays case?

Jenny, will you once again be my lawyer?

 

[BigApplePi]

Given the substantial injustice done to SpaceYeti, BAP is awarded to SpaceYeti as damages.

@walfin. Where is the appeals court? There is a law against cruel and unusual punishment. I thimk you should thimk this thing through.

@SpaceYeti. Are you going to put up with this? This decision may be damaging to your well-being. Do you have a comfortable couch in the barracks? I want TV and 'puter access. Do you get the gay porn channel?

 

[Jennywocky]

Your honor, I would like to make a reform of previous statement about cats, disregarding the confusion of cays.

I believe there is quit possible an exception to the rule of having more than 5 cats although this is just a representation of what would be too many cats. I believe it is up to the court to decide exactly how many cats is too many. I would make an exception from 5 cats to 10 in the event that there is a kittencabootle if any such case occurs. We have yet to define exactly how many cats is too many yet I believe because of religious background or other wise that we can be flexible with the term too many cats. I would certainly say that 25 cats, being exactly 5 kittencabootles in the case that it occurs gives ample room for 1 if not several individuals to have their own kittencabootle. I would like to state that cats may be counted as the amount of cats counted represented to an add sum from different individuals or collectively depending on the individual(s) involvement of used cats in relation to each other.



Walfin, do you have some sort of religious or otherwise background that you believe you are entitled to use in excess of 5 cats and what is your involvement If any to Animekittys use of cats? Surely it appears that 18 cats is far too many for one individual to have.

I think a case might be argued that the use of more than 5 felines in pursuit of the court implementing its version of justice could be catastrophic and might even leave the defendant catatonic.

Jenny, will you once again be my lawyer?

I will never stand in the way of aiding a client who has so little respect for himself as to [repeatedly] hire me as legal representation.

I'll be right with you as soon as I top off this bottle of scotch.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I will never stand in the way of aiding a client who has so little respect for himself as to [repeatedly] hire me as legal representation.

I'll be right with you as soon as I top off this bottle of scotch.

You mean it? Yay!! I have a liquor cabinet... key. I think it's walfin's. And you did win my last cays for me.

What's the worst that could happen?

 

[Jennywocky]

You mean it? Yay!! I have a liquor cabinet... key. I think it's walfin's. And you did win my last cays for me.

What's the worst that could happen?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfVsfOSbJY0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o3Q-eX9pOI

Note: These are exhibits 130630a-f.

 

[Absurdity]

This looks fun!

 

[JimJambones]

You mean it? Yay!! I have a liquor cabinet... key. I think it's walfin's. And you did win my last cays for me.

What's the worst that could happen?

no this is walfins

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Coooooooool! I wonder if we will finally be able to wipe out humanity? Let's get this ball a rolling.


Also, Ha! Wallfin!

 

[Jennywocky]

This looks fun!

That's the spirit!

And that's nothing compared to when I'm nominated to serve on SCOTINTPF (Supreme Court of the INTPf) because of my impeccable legal razzamatazz.

 

[QuickTwist]

I think a case might be argued that the use of more than 5 felines in pursuit of the court implementing its version of justice could be catastrophic and might even leave the defendant catatonic.

_______________________________________________________​

I will never stand in the way of aiding a client who has so little respect for himself as to [repeatedly] hire me as legal representation.

I'll be right with you as soon as I top off this bottle of scotch.

_________________________________________________________​

*whispers*

I would like to impose a stipulation to the rule regarding too many cats granted it Would be acceptable to the defendant if in the case there are too many cats that they are taken and made into sweaters to be worn by the defendant. It is impossible to prevent all cases where there are too many cats weather there is a law against it or not.

 

[walfin]

Jury time!

TheScornedReflex v QuickTwist

Next 3 posters as usual. The parties themselves and their advocates are banned this time.

@walfin. Where is the appeals court? There is a law against cruel and unusual punishment. I thimk you should thimk this thing through.

This is punishment?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Jury time!

TheScornedReflex v QuickTwist

Next 3 posters as usual.

Hehehehe, suckers..

The parties themselves and their advocates are banned this time.

But that's not fair!

 

[Jennywocky]

*whispers*

I would like to impose a stipulation to the rule regarding too many cats granted it Would be acceptable to the defendant if in the case there are too many cats that they are taken and made into sweaters to be worn by the defendant. It is impossible to prevent all cases where there are too many cats weather there is a law against it or not.

*scribbles note back*

"The most difficult aspect of weaving cats into sweaters for the defendant is how the cats continue to move, especially when a mouse scurries by or some joker starts waving around a laser pointer. If they were content enough to sit still while being worn, then perhaps this would be a viable option."

 

[QuickTwist]

I meant killing the cats and using the skin and fur to make into sweaters, not alive cats. This is the proper way to make cats into sweaters. There are several ways to get them in the form of a sweater from there. This depends on the way the individual wants the sweater to be fashioned.

I should have mentioned that, my bad.

The question remains how are the cats going to be killed and by whom?

 

[TimeAsylums]

-gasp-

Cruella de ville of kats.

 

[QuickTwist]

*whispers*

I think I said that too loud.

 

[Jennywocky]

I meant killing the cats and using the skin and fur to make into sweaters, not alive cats. This is the proper way to make cats into sweaters. There are several ways to get them in the form of a sweater from there. This depends on the way the individual wants the sweater to be fashioned.

I should have mentioned that, my bad.

The question remains how are the cats going to be killed and by whom?

*GASP*

You, sir, are guilty of a deplorable lack of imagination.

Lock him up with Storyteller Tom, the Cat of Nine Tales.

 

[walfin]

TimeAsylums is confirmed as a juror. Congratulations!

Hehehehe, suckers..






But that's not fair!

You have a point. To be fair, I will ban myself from being juror as well. Fair enough?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I meant killing the cats and using the skin and fur to make into sweaters, not alive cats. This is the proper way to make cats into sweaters. There are several ways to get them in the form of a sweater from there. This depends on the way the individual wants the sweater to be fashioned.

I should have mentioned that, my bad.

The question remains how are the cats going to be killed and by whom?

Now you are talking about killing cats to make a sweater! Have you no heart? Cats have the right to live, man.. As my sweater.


*points thumb over shoulder towards QT*

I think this guy is... IS SANE!!!!!!

 

[TheScornedReflex]

TimeAsylums is confirmed as a juror. Congratulations!



You have a point. To be fair, I will ban myself from being juror as well. Fair enough?

*Crosses arms and pouts*

.... Fiiiiine.

 

[Jennywocky]

I think this guy is... IS SANE!!!!!!

BAAA! Get him out of this court, he doesn't belong here!

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Can we move for a mis-trial?

 

[Jennywocky]

Can we move for a mis-trial?

Why? Was the trial missed?

 

[QuickTwist]

*Crosses arms and pouts*

.... Fiiiiine.

Are you queer or something?

 

[walfin]

Wait a minute. Is Jenny a lawyer for anyone?

 

[Jennywocky]

Wait a minute. Is Jenny a lawyer for anyone?

I think I'm free roaming counsel and JIT -- judge in training?

 

[JimJambones]

"The more cays you have the better the sweater is gonna be? I'm not sure I understand your case. Could you explain it further?"

We all know cays make the best sweaters. What is this court's stance on Cay Marriage?

 

[Jennywocky]

We all know cays make the best sweaters. What is this court's stance on Cay Marriage?

it's so gay.

next question.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Are you queer or something?

It's not gay if I imagine it as a pigs females butt. And that other guy really did have a perrtie mouth!!

*Starts playing banjo*


Insanity has no sexuality..

 

[TimeAsylums]

what is the court's opinion on assisted suicide/genocide?

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Why? Was the trial missed?

I DON'T KNOW!!!!!

 

[walfin]

Congratulations, JamJambones! You have been confirmed as a juror.

what is the court's opinion on assisted suicide/genocide?

This opinion is directed to my able self-appointed trainee, Jenny, just like the one on cay marriage.

 

[Ex-User (5841)]

I meant killing the cats and using the skin and fur to make into sweaters, not alive cats. This is the proper way to make cats into sweaters. There are several ways to get them in the form of a sweater from there. This depends on the way the individual wants the sweater to be fashioned.

I should have mentioned that, my bad.

The question remains how are the cats going to be killed and by whom?

A sweater is by definition knitted from a yarn or string. You can't realistically turn cat pelts into sweaters without a lot of needless, inefficient cutting.

You can, however, tan their hides and turn them into a bitchin' pair of underwear.

 

[TimeAsylums]

You can, however, tan their hides and turn them into a bitchin' pair of underwear.

Gives the term southern 'fur' a new meaning.

 

[Jennywocky]

what is the court's opinion on assisted suicide/genocide?

This opinion is directed to my able self-appointed trainee, Jenny, just like the one on cay marriage.

Might I clarify whether this is a query about assisted suicide and genocide, or assisted suicide and assisted genocide?

Regardless, the court's opinion is that we will gladly assist with killing someone who really has it coming but otherwise do not accept responsibility for deaths incurred outside our direct jurisdiction (unless we are paid a lot of money to set up some unsuspecting patsy to take the fall).

Also, killing yourself is a crime punishable by death.
Just so you know.


... did I get it right?

 

[walfin]

Might I clarify whether this is a query about assisted suicide and genocide, or assisted suicide and assisted genocide?

Regardless, the court's opinion is that we will gladly assist with killing someone who really has it coming but otherwise do not accept responsibility for deaths incurred outside our direct jurisdiction (unless we are paid a lot of money to set up some unsuspecting patsy to take the fall).

Also, killing yourself is a crime punishable by death.
Just so you know.


... did I get it right?

Ah, the solution dawns on me.

suicide/genocide=sui/geno
=>ius/nego

This symbolises that the law is over all negotiations.

From now on, all settlements, including those involving attempted suicide and/or genocide, are punishable for contempt.

QED.

But anyway, whatever you say is right in my eyes, darling girl.