You and Learning Disabilities

[HDINTP]

Hope the title says most. Do you have any kind of (or supposedly) LD? How has that affected your Life so far (school/work/psychological barriers in socializing...).

Actually as I write it down here question it occured to me I would like to know how many of you are twice-exceptional and since I ask that I would also like to know which of you think/are "only" Learning Disabled...? (don't believe many are)

And because I dare to ask such a thing I'll start. I have (supposedly) 3 Learning disabilities ( am not so sure about ADHD). The one that complicates me life the most is Dyspraxia I would say. So simple tasks such as paper work or house chores as "cut from a comedy " and no could not be a secretary I suppose . I get also lost REALLY Easily. Interesting thing is it gets much better when I am not sober. And the Last one I probably have is Dysgraphia. That also used to be a bit of puzzle to me because I did not know few things about it in the past. Now that I do I have to smile when recalling one of my teacher's saying: "You write something else than you think". Was right even though it's not "that" brutal... So school was one of my nouns up there. Few people I encountered during highschool figured out I have a Huge discrepancy between my oral examination performance and written one in favour of the former (in some areas quite "Brilliant" while in others Literally Retarded - Talking about IQ 70 if I can help with that construct). But as I said overall functioning in non-verbal tasks was not that bad but nothing that special also really. And as for social life, relationships etc. I guess it realy helped I never considered my weaknesses a problem that much anyway since tasks it affected the most were not of importance to me at the time of my say teenage years. Here I would also like to ask how big is a chance it could be mostly why I evolved this way. I put emphasis on few domains and maybe neglected some others. Did you have simillar thoughts about your weaknesses? (asking large gaps there - again if used to illustrate even 70 points in sub-tests) My living example is probably the reason I strongly disagree with notion of some people that you are either verbal/Language type of person or Non-verbal/Maths and I also like to put Terece Tao as example. So depending on task involved people can get an impression I am completely stupid and they would be partially right. I read somewhere about a person who's mental capabilities were truly amazing but could tell you "many" things while he could not do them himself (like constructing something for example). I strongly relate to this do some of you too?

Even though it turned into kind of an Essay the point was simply to give an example of what I am mainly asking YOU Here and would like you to share your stories in this sphere of your Life...

Looking forward,
HD

 

[QuickTwist]

I can relate.

I have been diagnosed with ADHD and I know that the executive functioning of my brain is pretty poor. My processing speed is like 76 or some shit, very low, and my working memory isn't much better at about 10 pts above that.

I think the thing I related to the most of what you said was about not writing what I actually think. I play Forum Mafia... a lot.. and it's ALWAYS been a problem with people not knowing wtf I am saying. I am thinking this is due to me not being able to articulate in written language as well as I actually understand. People who know me well can know what I am saying/writing (I have asked), but it seems the main problem is people not having any idea how I got from point A to point B. The two are related, I just have a gap in my ability to express how they are connected. People have told me that they said they understand what I was writing, but that it seemed like the exact same thing that you are talking about - that I am writing something different than what I am thinking. The way it was expressed is that what I know is intuitive, but then I go to great lengths to explain this intuition in a rational way and it just comes out all wonky and stuff. When I read what I have written, it makes perfect sense to me. I know exactly what I am saying. The frustrating thing is that even though I know I am making sense to me, I am not making sense to other people. I have gone to great great lengths to teach myself how to be razor sharp with my articulation and it seems in all the progress I have made, it's still a big problem sometimes.

As far as "Development" is concerned, I believe the problem lies in how the human brain tends to narrow its focus as you mature and get older. Deviations in cognitive ability are likely caused a lot from cultural influences. Just as some may develop a weakness in IQ they may narrow their focus in such a way to make them extremely competent in other areas. What we know about how malleable the brain is now, I believe cultural influences play a huge role in how your brain works. Because of this, who your parents are, and what their cultural influences were/are has quite a large impact on how that child's brain develops. I can't prove any of this ofc, but I think things as basic as brain structure is influenced based on what you learn from your primary care givers. What we know is that there is so much information in our environment and that life is so complex that we are forced to focus on a very few things so that we can even make sense of any of it at all. In short, the way your brain works is learned and not "programmed."

 

[Black Rose]

There is a 46 point difference between processing speed and verbal. I learned that Processing speed problems are perceptual problems, the ability to locate and recognize shapes. My left parietal-frontal junction is lateralized towards logic(analogy, deductive, inductive) at 130 measured by figure weights, it is why my general intelligence (g) is 130. But my right frontal-parietal junction lateralize is 80 and is why I can't draw. General intelligence on the right brain is not the same general intelligence as the left brain. My working memory is 95 I can hold 5 items in my head at once consciously. I can track far more. Working memory is meant to measure the number of things you can mentally manipulate. I think it was a fluke I got so high as 95.

I am constantly mentally and physically fatigued. I have no energy have brain damage from mental stress, I feel stuck all the time in my right frontal lobes. The right frontal lobes inhibit you, tell you to stop. I get burning sensations from their constant activation. The left frontal lobes tell you to go, go, go. I never just go, go, go. I stop, stop, stop and it burns.

Logic - 130
language - 130
speed (perception) 85
working memory (95)

Burning sensations in the front right brain feel stuck, stop stop stop. 46 point discrepancy.

 

[Yellow]

I have Aphantasia, which occasionally lead to complications in school, but it wasn't diagnosed. I didn't even know it was a thing with a name until very recently. I found out it wasn't normal to be without imagery when I was like 20, but I just accepted that I was imagination-impaired.

It was also mitigated by the fact that for some reason my short-term memory can continue to "read" things I see after I'm done looking at them. Even though I had no image in my head. I actually spent a fair amount of time believing I had a photographic memory because of this. It feels a little ironic, now.

 

[Black Rose]

I have Aphantasia

same
I do remember unconsciously though.
I remember a picture book I had at 7.
I just cannot consciously see it.
I can tell you everything inside it.
It was about Garfield.

 

[Black Rose]

The horrible thing about lacking mental clarity is that holding items in minds and their relationships become too fuzzy from pressure to handle putting them in proper order. To properly order items in mind there must be clarity. No pressure, no fuzziness. Then a person is capable of internal mental manipulation. My brother is a very mechanical person. He told me he passed all his mechanics classes in high school. He was very focused on external things. I had ideas that I came up with that he kept telling me were impractical, would never work. I never consciously manipulated my ideas. I sat in my chair looking at my notepad or writing or looking at pictures until I had the idea and then I expressed the idea and elaborated on it. If I found errors I corrected for them. No one in my computer class liked me, the teacher did not like me.

I am not capable of internal manipulation. I am not good with external engineering stuff. I recognize patterns and it is unique because I have my own tools and inventions and systems I have built up that I use my pattern recognition for. It is quite irrational. So it can't be useful or anything. I try and create things in a conscious manner (internal mental manipulation) but it does not work. The reason I bring up mental clarity is that it has to do with creativity. Subconsciously I can work out a few patterns by combining them. I just need to feel less stress and complete emptiness of mental blockages, fatigue, low energy. Like with my perceptual issues (processing speed) something is making me stuck and perception feels like running through mud.

Thinking generally happens in the head. I try thinking and my mind goes blank. Nothing fills it. My head just is empty. I said I do not do engineering and I said I combine patterns. I am good with logic but can't draw. Being stuck is the hardest thing to deal with because even if I was unable to think I would still be able to function on patterns but even that is to difficult most times. I push myself too hard to think because patterns recognition alone cannot help me develop my ideas. I wish I could think and recognize patterns at the same time.

(Stuck)

 

[Niclmaki]

Interesting stuff. I don’t have any kind of learning disability (that I know of, hah), but one of my biggest fears IS losing some of my mental capacity.

Would you say having a learning disability is like a net-loss overall? Or more like a direction you just can’t develop so you grow out in other ways to compensate?

In my understanding, the brain seems to be very inhibited by itself. I imagine it as many ‘compartments’ fighting for the spotlight of concious attention. So, if a part is lacking it is simply filled by another.

Additionally, what is considered “normal” learning capacity / abilities? I’m not too sure if I would call myself normal or exceptional. My brain just kind of GIVES me the answers to questions 95% of the time. The other 4% I have to think through it, step by step. And the last 1% my brain will just refuse to give me the info I want. I mention this because most people I know seem to do step by step thinking.

 

[Black Rose]

Would you say having a learning disability is like a net-loss overall? Or more like a direction you just can’t develop so you grow out in other ways to compensate?

With me, I ignore the areas that deal with perception so my brain is uneven in what it does. I guess those parts are taken up for other things. It just feels too intense paying attention, too draining. I have been doing it more to try and make myself more intelligent but I blink a lot with my right eye. Looking at things just feels draining. Something could be causing the draining. it should be normal to just look at things.

In my understanding, the brain seems to be very inhibited by itself. I imagine it as many ‘compartments’ fighting for the spotlight of concious attention. So, if a part is lacking it is simply filled by another.

When you say answers just come to you it should be that all areas are working together, coordinating and prioritizing where information is sent.

I mention this because most people I know seem to do step by step thinking.

It depends on what it is I need to work out but math most definitely.

 

[Niclmaki]

Uneven? Like more error prone? Or just remembering / emphasizing different aspects of a thing.

For example, you could have a hard time with the “simon says” games with 4 colours. But, if you instead remember it as a number sequence instead of a colour sequence it is much easier. Or is it just impossible either way?

 

[Black Rose]

I forgot where I said uneven but it is like using the muscles in an uneven way. Either by not practicing with certain muscles or by having week muscle. Left-handedness vs right-handedness. As I mentioned before the left frontal parietal junction is most associated with logic but the right side with visual perspective. It is 130 logic and 80 spatial for me thus uneven. I cannot draw and more right-brained lateralizations I lack also. Within hemispheres, the different segment is wired up. 180 brain regions exist so if some are connected up strong or have atrophied that is a possibility. That changed the balance/evenness of the communications. I cannot draw that means some pathway is affecting other pathways differently than if I were able to draw. I say uneven because I should say more developed areas and less developed areas connected together.

 

[QuickTwist]

I forgot where I said uneven but it is like using the muscles in an uneven way. Either by not practicing with certain muscles or by having week muscle. Left-handedness vs right-handedness. As I mentioned before the left frontal parietal junction is most associated with logic but the right side with visual perspective. It is 130 logic and 80 spatial for me thus uneven. I cannot draw and more right-brained lateralizations I lack also. Within hemispheres, the different segment is wired up. 180 brain regions exist so if some are connected up strong or have atrophied that is a possibility. That changed the balance/evenness of the communications. I cannot draw that means some pathway is affecting other pathways differently than if I were able to draw. I say uneven because I should say more developed areas and less developed areas connected together.

People who know how to draw well practice drawing a lot. They are not born like that except a very small percentage of them.

 

[Black Rose]

People who know how to draw well practice drawing a lot. They are not born like that except a very small percentage of them.

not born with the skill but with the preference which leads to the motivation to continue with what they are doing. I never felt like drawing so I never did but my sister found it fun and did it all the time. I did what was fun to me and that is what I do now which is a bit ambiguous to explain but I never began drawing for fun from childhood and with my perceptual difficulties which takes effort to even pay attention to normal spatial and color aspects of my environment it would be more effort for me to try now. What you say I here all the time, they are not born with it, they practiced. I guess, but they also found it fun and had no vision problems. They also look at things which is very important, the most important maybe to get it on paper. If I fix my looking at things problems I will be able to draw more decent than anything I can now but the most important thing I said was:

I say uneven because I should say more developed areas and less developed areas connected together.

If I look at things more, some areas will become more developed. Most likely on the right side of my brain.

 

[QuickTwist]

If I look at things more, some areas will become more developed. Most likely on the right side of my brain.

Exactly.

 

[Black Rose]

Exactly.

I can't draw. This means I overdeveloped other areas.

 

[QuickTwist]

I can't draw. This means I overdeveloped other areas.

Sure. But that doesn't mean you cannot change your brain. We are still figuring out how malleable our brains are.

 

[Happy]

I’m diagnosed with full-blown ADDs. It’s a bit shit, but with proper management, it works out okay. It is hard to keep up the proper management though, and it only takes one link in the chain to break and everything falls apart. The repeated failure has really forced me to come to terms with my own limitations, and I really need to be honest with myself if I’m to function on a day to day basis. It’s pretty hard some days, especially with the project-based work I do, and I often slip into depression, which is largely related to the ‘disorder’.

I probably have some other LDs but it’s one of those things that I’m happier not knowing for sure. I suffered a lot of brain damage as a baby, and I’m extremely lucky to have the brain function that I do have, so I’m still very grateful, despite the difficulty.

 

[Black Rose]

I’m diagnosed with full-blown ADDs.

I heard that it is a motor cortex problem, that impulses just come because of the motor cortex just acts. Or is it you do not have the ADHD version? I know that the attention part of the brain is understimulated in that case (ADD). Do you take Adderall?

 

[Happy]

I heard that it is a motor cortex problem, that impulses just come because of the motor cortex just acts. Or is it you do not have the ADHD version? I know that the attention part of the brain is understimulated in that case (ADD). Do you take Adderall?

I have ADHD-PI. I just like calling it full-blown ADDs because it makes me chuckle. I used to take dexamphetamine (similar to adderall), but I took myself off it when I started showing signs of dependency. An effect I didn’t expect was that having been on the medication for a number of years, I got to know what executive function feels like, so I can sort of replicate it now through meditation.

 

[Pyropyro]

I have diagnosed autism when I was already an adult. Academic courses weren't that bad. However, I suck at physical activities, have issues with strong lights and other sensory overloading stuff and social practices.

And I agree with OP, Dyspraxia is quite annoying. However, it was mitigated somewhat by constant exercise and martial arts. I guess repeated practice simply force your body's senses and movement to synchronize.

 

[HDINTP]

The horrible thing about lacking mental clarity is that holding items in minds and their relationships become too fuzzy from pressure to handle putting them in proper order. To properly order items in mind there must be clarity. No pressure, no fuzziness. Then a person is capable of internal mental manipulation. My brother is a very mechanical person. He told me he passed all his mechanics classes in high school. He was very focused on external things. I had ideas that I came up with that he kept telling me were impractical, would never work. I never consciously manipulated my ideas. I sat in my chair looking at my notepad or writing or looking at pictures until I had the idea and then I expressed the idea and elaborated on it. If I found errors I corrected for them. No one in my computer class liked me, the teacher did not like me.

I am not capable of internal manipulation. I am not good with external engineering stuff. I recognize patterns and it is unique because I have my own tools and inventions and systems I have built up that I use my pattern recognition for. It is quite irrational. So it can't be useful or anything. I try and create things in a conscious manner (internal mental manipulation) but it does not work. The reason I bring up mental clarity is that it has to do with creativity. Subconsciously I can work out a few patterns by combining them. I just need to feel less stress and complete emptiness of mental blockages, fatigue, low energy. Like with my perceptual issues (processing speed) something is making me stuck and perception feels like running through mud.

Thinking generally happens in the head. I try thinking and my mind goes blank. Nothing fills it. My head just is empty. I said I do not do engineering and I said I combine patterns. I am good with logic but can't draw. Being stuck is the hardest thing to deal with because even if I was unable to think I would still be able to function on patterns but even that is to difficult most times. I push myself too hard to think because patterns recognition alone cannot help me develop my ideas. I wish I could think and recognize patterns at the same time.

(Stuck)

Well My internal "All" is "Awesome". I can mentally imagine and manipulate and also do it quite fast "whatever" but external is a Big problem for me. I get lost easily, do not remember how my room looks like, what I had for Breakfast etc. Egocentric visualisation is mostly really weak for me so things like driving car, tracking etc. are hell for me. On the other hand allocentric visualisation is Mostly where I excel...

I am same on drawing - "End of story". When I was 14 my drawing ability was measured to be of an Average 5 years old

Could you explain to me more in detail what the F**k is happening since I know you are interested in psychometrics...?

My short-term working memory is also supposed to be awesome sadly it only works in acemics for me though...

As for perceptual speed with test that looked like this: you get raws of numbers and are supposed to circle the same numbers - one, doubles and tiples (digit number) I scored in 70's, however my by far worst sub-test was "Block Design"...

Strong are/were Vocabulary, Arithmetic, Digit span (this one was actually fun, since last time I figured out I was using only half of my Mental Resources and still came out as "superior". And this is actually Next problem with me. I usually have great internal mental capabilities as I mentioned above but sometimes do not use right methods even thought I would be more than able to do it if I used "usual method". For example when I had to spell words backwards I had no problem doing it even at 10 letters whatsoever but did not use visualization since my "auditory loop" was able to take care of it alone. If I decide to employ it as well then if I recall correctly I can get to 15 no problem and then it starts to finally get interesting... Of course they came to the conclusion I had "weak visualization ability when I explained what I did" However that was not turly the case I just did not feel the need to utilise it. Truth is I can visualize internally better than vast majority of humans I believe. External I am truly "Intellectually Disabled". So sometimes people can come to the conclusion I am truly "stupid". I can give an example: When I am searching something in physical documents then it is a Disaster: Six times and not finding so today I am used to it and go for the seventh knowing it will actually be there...


As for your computer class coment. It is actually encouraging that you still got where you are with your handicap for many I believe (me included, even though my imagination is probably my strongest cognitive ability and I also value it the most)

I actually understood myself after a long time and realized I am what you would call auditorily-visual learner. In practice it looks as if you watch documentary in away... I have no eidatic memory (as my friend does) but I can remember really well what I create inside head myself (mainly visual incentives...) One of my teachers in high school were the same and tried to guide me when she figured out how I was....

As for Mathematical part someone wrote (will find here hopefully and/or I will answer his/her post anyway) I have big strenghts Auditorily/Visual and Big weaknesses Sequentially/spatial if I can simplify like that. So even though I go step by step subconsiously I have then problems explaining how I got there (thankfully My Maths teacher used to be a lot like me (his words) and so was also able to help me). So for me not really step by step...

As for Logic I seem to be exceptionally strong when it comes to Deduction and exceptionally weak when we talk induction. Is it possible Animekitty? It might sound weird (maybe even contradictory to a degree) but that's how I come off do not know why exactly...

 

[HDINTP]

Interesting stuff. I don’t have any kind of learning disability (that I know of, hah), but one of my biggest fears IS losing some of my mental capacity.

Would you say having a learning disability is like a net-loss overall? Or more like a direction you just can’t develop so you grow out in other ways to compensate?

In my understanding, the brain seems to be very inhibited by itself. I imagine it as many ‘compartments’ fighting for the spotlight of concious attention. So, if a part is lacking it is simply filled by another.

Additionally, what is considered “normal” learning capacity / abilities? I’m not too sure if I would call myself normal or exceptional. My brain just kind of GIVES me the answers to questions 95% of the time. The other 4% I have to think through it, step by step. And the last 1% my brain will just refuse to give me the info I want. I mention this because most people I know seem to do step by step thinking.

I guess I feel you there. I used to have almost panic attacks about when I am more than 25 all going downhill Mentally then I read some study (believe I have/had thread on this forum) where one of my strenghts (visual) peaking around 50 and since then I am calm... (hope it helps).


I vote for direct one I am a Living proof (some sub-areas are truly exceptional (talking 160's here and some "Disabled" (Mid-Retardation) - 70's. So naturally I believe in this one...

Normal for sake of true over-simplification I would help myself here with IQ again - 100 would be normal then from my perspective but I do NOT belive IQ is the whole story DEFINITELY.

And finally as I alredy wrote in this Thread I For Example am most likely not Step-by-Step Thinker...

 

[HDINTP]

I have diagnosed autism when I was already an adult. Academic courses weren't that bad. However, I suck at physical activities, have issues with strong lights and other sensory overloading stuff and social practices.

And I agree with OP, Dyspraxia is quite annoying. However, it was mitigated somewhat by constant exercise and martial arts. I guess repeated practice simply force your body's senses and movement to synchronize.

Yea, but only to a Degree. I also got by arts and sports and at least at Racquet sports I am/was quite good (Always liked them) so what to say: Perhaps that we each and every one of us are truly Originals in one way or more...

 

[Black Rose]

Could you explain to me more in detail what the F**k is happening since I know you are interested in psychometrics...?

I am in the same boat as you. I draw like crap. And like I told QuickTwist I believe it is because I have problems looking at things. The pencil to paper is also there, it takes spatial awareness (perspective). And I just do not enjoy doing it.

Truth is I can visualize internally better than vast majority of humans I believe. External I am truly "Intellectually Disabled".

Yellow has Aphantasia and so do I. Its hard to relate but I understand.

As for Logic I seem to be exceptionally strong when it comes to Deduction and exceptionally weak when we talk induction. Is it possible Animekitty? It might sound weird (maybe even contradictory to a degree) but that's how I come off do not know why exactly...

Analogical reasoning is between deductive and inductive. If you move off to one side and only practice deductive or inductive you may have a proclivity or are just preferenced like how I do not like drawing. You do many deductive activities that reinforce it. But in general, if you take the figure weights tests analogical reasoning means you are both deductive and inductive.

 

[Minuend]

I have ADHD-PI. I just like calling it full-blown ADDs because it makes me chuckle. I used to take dexamphetamine (similar to adderall), but I took myself off it when I started showing signs of dependency. An effect I didn’t expect was that having been on the medication for a number of years, I got to know what executive function feels like, so I can sort of replicate it now through meditation.

How did you get diagnosed with adhd? Or, I guess, what set off the suspicion?

I get what you mean by being able to use executive function because you learned what they were after meds. I've had similar experiences in other areas

I'm kinda asking because sometimes I wonder if adhd could be the reason for my poor cognitive functioning. I did relative poor in school and continued to struggle in uni. I feel that I understand things well, the understanding just doesn't exist outside my mind, and I'm not good at translating it into something other people understand. A lot of the time I feel that I understand something well, but other people will just look at me weirdly and/ or be confused by what I said. In general, I perform like a retard, even though I feel I could do and perform much better.

 

[Happy]

How did you get diagnosed with adhd? Or, I guess, what set off the suspicion?

I get what you mean by being able to use executive function because you learned what they were after meds. I've had similar experiences in other areas

I'm kinda asking because sometimes I wonder if adhd could be the reason for my poor cognitive functioning. I did relative poor in school and continued to struggle in uni. I feel that I understand things well, the understanding just doesn't exist outside my mind, and I'm not good at translating it into something other people understand. A lot of the time I feel that I understand something well, but other people will just look at me weirdly and/ or be confused by what I said. In general, I perform like a retard, even though I feel I could do and perform much better.

I was in my 3rd year of uni (of 6) and after having been consistently frustrated for the past decade or so whenever I had to produce something, I started thinking, and my thought process went something like “it’s like I have no attention span. Like I have some sort of attention deficit or something... wait a sec, isn’t that a thing?” It really was a sudden realisation. And so after looking into ADHD checklists online and checking every box (lol) I went to a psychiatrist who specialises in adult ADHD (a respected one) and he interviewed me for about an hour. He diagnosed me ADHD-PI and we commenced treatment.

I guess if it’s on your mind it would be worth looking into. If you do, I’d recommend trying to find the best treatment you can, because it’s one of those disorders that gets over-diagnosed and under-treated.

 

[Black Rose]

People think I have Autism. I googled social cues deficit and got back these results.

Autism Reading Room

• The amygdala detects varying intensities of social information; it also evaluates trustworthiness[3].
• the cells in the superior temporal sulcus are activated when others show emotion, or when we show the same emotion. [See “The Social Brain” to learn about these brain cells, called mirror neurons.]
• The fusiform gyrus helps to recognize faces. This allows children to pick out other humans from and early age.

Rixus saw my videos and says his little girl has autism or Aspergers like me. My videos go back to 2010. Like I said before I have perceptual problems. I most likely have problems with my right frontal lobes burning (the stop response). But back to the website I can detect trust, I can detect emotions and I can read faces. I just have severe mental pain. Some people when in severe mental stress roll their eyes back into their head or have disorganized speech because they become stuck in their ability to fluidly connect meanings together. It's like the dystonia of the mind, not the body. Different parts of the mind/brain are twisting into themselves.

Different parts of the mind/brain are twisting into themselves. That is what is wrong with me. Like dystonia but in my head. It is not autism. I understand social cues, I can learn them, I know when my behavior is inappropriate. I just have a neurological condition where my brain is twisting into itself and people think that is autism or Aspergers. If my arm and leg were twisted I would not function well. My brain does not function well. If everything were to unwind I would probably not have the stuck feeling that I feel right now. A person with a twisted arm could play sports better if their arm was not twisted.

Perhaps the reason I am classified as having a nonverbal learning disability is because the stuck feeling is a symptom of the brain being twisted and the disability would go away if the brain was untwisted. I am going to tell my therapist this tomorrow and see what she thinks.

 

[Ex-User (14663)]

I was in my 3rd year of uni (of 6) and after having been consistently frustrated for the past decade or so whenever I had to produce something, I started thinking, and my thought process went something like “it’s like I have no attention span. Like I have some sort of attention deficit or something... wait a sec, isn’t that a thing?” It really was a sudden realisation. And so after looking into ADHD checklists online and checking every box (lol) I went to a psychiatrist who specialises in adult ADHD (a respected one) and he interviewed me for about an hour. He diagnosed me ADHD-PI and we commenced treatment.

I guess if it’s on your mind it would be worth looking into. If you do, I’d recommend trying to find the best treatment you can, because it’s one of those disorders that gets over-diagnosed and under-treated.

Diagnosis of ADHD after talking for an hour – I'd call that pretty good proof that this ADHD bullshit is an invention to sell more drugs.

 

[Black Rose]

Diagnosis of ADHD after talking for an hour – I'd call that pretty good proof that this ADHD bullshit is an invention to sell more drugs.

You're making the same mistake as you did with IQ again with misplaced attribution. The questionnaire does not make a person have a made up thing called ADHD. The psychometrics discovered a person has mental attributes of a low executive functioning that is measurable. IQ measures a capacity for handling information which by all other standards is useful. Capacity alone is not assurance a person is "smart" but it is foolish to think the capacity of information handling plays no role or that tests would be unable to measures such capacities. With ADHD and executive functioning, I imagine the inability to plan and organize would create tremendous stress on Happy and he did say he learned to feel what executive functioning felt like after years of practice. Dismissing Happy's account either shows too much hate for the medical field or genuine disbelief of Happy's condition. Either way, I am still ticked off that my attempts to explain IQ was dismissed as word games and appeals to authority. I simply believe the capacity to handle information exists, it is useful and measurable. I am perplexed by people that say everything is fake all the time or that autism is fake because vaccines cause autism which I explained just above in post 26 indirectly why that should not be the case. Face, Emotion and Trust recognition would need to be directly targeted by vaccines which I doubt is the case.

 

[Ex-User (14663)]

You're making the same mistake as you did with IQ again with misplaced attribution.

"the same mistake"? I don't recall anyone ever decisevly showing a mistake in my reasoning regarding IQ.

The questionnaire does not make a person have a made up thing called ADHD. The psychometrics discovered a person has mental attributes of a low executive functioning that is measurable. IQ measures a capacity for handling information which by all other standards is useful. Capacity alone is not assurance a person is "smart" but it is foolish to think the capacity of information handling plays no role or that tests would be unable to measures such capacities.

This is circular reasoning, as I have pointed out before. You're assuming a-priori that the tests measure what you want to measure. But it is clear that it is not even possible to measure directly what you want to measure, and whether it actually measures that attribute is a hypothesis which itself is not possible to falsify nor verify directly. Hell, people haven't even defined what that attribute actually is. So I can make up the same story about anything – chess, crossword puzzles, Sudoku, or your ability to jump rope. I just say: I have a psychometric tool that measures human cognition. I know that because the scores on this test correlate with success in [some abitrary human activity]. Boom.

Dismissing Happy's account either shows too much hate for the medical field or genuine disbelief of Happy's condition.

I don't have hate for the medical field. I have hate for bogus institutions and belief in unfounded claims – especially claims that force kids to eat mind-altering chemicals if they don't conform to [some arbitrary standards made up by some institution].

I am perplexed by people that say everything is fake all the time or that autism is fake

Well, I have never claimed that autism is fake. I hope it should be possible to criticize one part of psychology without rejecting the whole field and all results it ever produced.

 

[Black Rose]

This is circular reasoning, as I have pointed out before. You're assuming a-priori that the tests measure what you want to measure. But it is clear that it is not even possible to measure directly what you want to measure, so whether it actually measures that attribute is a hypothesis which itself is not possible to falsify nor verify directly. Hell, people haven't even defined what that attribute actually is. So I can make up the same story about anything – chess, crossword puzzles, Sudoku, or your ability to jump rope. I just say: I have a psychometric tool that measures human cognition. I know that because the scores on this test correlate with success in [some abitrary human activity]. Boom.

If the attribute is to measure the capacity to handle information and abstractions then it is not arbitrary like chess and sudoku because there is no prior learning involved but only pure ability to manipulate, retain and create new information. This a-priori notion you have of the tests comes from never having exposure to these tests or experiencing the difficulty of solving problems on these tests that have I personally found to not be arbitrary at all. Like the part where my hand-eye coordination was low and I imagine other people scored better than me just because they can. Not because hand-eye coordination is apriori a sudoku but because the nervous system just works faster than others. 85 percent of people have faster hand-eye coordination than me. 65 percent of people can hold longer strings of numbers in their heads than I can. I can only hold 4-5 numbers in my head at any given time the average is 7 and the high average is 10.

I am not bringing these numbers up to play word games. My point is that to not be circular in reasoning I must show that objective measurements are being made. I can hold 4 numbers in my head, I am slower than 85 percent of people at hand-eye coordination. I took the logic subtest and I did better than 99 percent of people at analogical reasoning where I needed to find the equivalency between two sides of weighted measurements.

This cannot be circular reasoning because we are not saying the measurement is the thing being measured. Indirectly we can see I hold 4 numbers in my head and someone else holds 10. - Oh, this must be circular reasoning and is not objective it is just apriori assuming the measurement is what is being measured. I guess anime kitty does not really have the capacity to only hold just 4 numbers.

If they can measure my capacity to hold 4 numbers in my head at one time then they can measure my capacity to handle other information that is not sudoku which is a straw man. If I have to repeat this 50 million times I will repeat this 50 million times. A person that can abstract with the capacity to handle more information will be able to do more mental activities involves greater amounts of information. My ability to do arithmetic in my head is limited to my capacity to hold 4 numbers, a person with the capacity to hold 10 numbers will be able to do more complex arithmetic. This is an example of information capacity and it amazes me, people, associate this with sudoku.

The IQ test I took read by my psychiatrist is interpreted to mean I have a Nonverbal learning disability. My hand-eye coordination is more than three deviations below verbal. My ability to put patterns together is truncated by my speed to express myself. At times I have felt 5 times fasters that I have before. 5 times the ability to handle information faster. It is difficult to think all this is circular reasoning when I know I have experienced different capacities in information processing in my life.

 

[Ex-User (14663)]

@Animekitty To take these properties you are talking about – holding numbers in one's mind and the speed of the nervous system. Let me ask you this: do you think chess grandmasters, who can memorize full chess boards in an instant can do so because they have faster nervous systems? Or are born with superior short-term memory?

There have been done experiments where they compared chess grandmasters to amateurs in those things and turns out it has nothing to do with innate properties of their nervous system. It's just that they built, over time, neural pathways that allow them to extract certain information from their sensory data more efficiently – in particular, visual data containing chess positions. When the chess positions were swapped out with pieces arranged completely randomly on the board, the chess grandmasters did exactly as badly as the amateurs did. This doesn't prove that everything is just developed neural pathways as response to experienced stimuli, but it shows that it is extremely hard to reduce the human mind to these simple, innate cognitive properties like the amount of numbers they can keep in their head.

 

[Black Rose]

@Serac You believe the tests are circular because:

"The test measures intelligence because we define the tests as measuring intelligence."

That is not how measurements work and is a strawman.

A capacity is an amount that is the quantified limit a container can hold.

If we say there is a finite mental capacity then we are saying what can be held is finite.

What can be mentally manipulated is finite, what can be the limit of information processing is measurable, is quantifiable.

We must accept that intelligence is quantifiable before we make a tests contract because no psychometrician would be mentally disabled enough to assume a circular construct as a valid IQ test. The test does not define itself, that's just stupid.

From there, we can say that we can measure quantifiable aspects of intelligence that involve information and mental manipulation capacities. In the different areas, those apply and to test if those areas do measure real capacities not just specialized capacities.

The range of capacities and the quantity of each capacity together determines the overall capacity of information manipulation. This is quantifiable and determines the complexity of environmental variables a person can accommodate. Environments with more information are predicted to be understood better by people that can mentally manipulate more in their heads to grasp this information. It should not be controversial that some people are overwhelmed by too much information other people easily grasp. This is what IQ tests are trying to measure.

 

[Ex-User (14663)]

@Animekitty you simply swapped out "intelligence" with "capacity". How do you define this capacity? Is my capacity for, say, creating music the same as the capacity for remembering number sequences? Is my capacity for remembering number sequences the same as my capacity for remembering human faces? Is my capacity for doing math the same as my capacity for speaking different languages? Is my capacity for learning how to play tennis the same as my capacity for doing inductive logic?

 

[Black Rose]

@Animekitty you simply swapped out "intelligence" with "capacity". How do you define this capacity? Is my capacity for, say, creating music the same as the capacity for remembering number sequences? Is my capacity for remembering number sequences the same as my capacity for remembering human faces? Is my capacity for doing math the same as my capacity for speaking different languages? Is my capacity for learning how to play tennis the same as my capacity for doing inductive logic?

I would define it as the ability to do more and more and more. The more you have the more you have. Is that not so simple to understand? That a person smarter than Animekitty can do more than Animekitty in various mental activities and that they are quantifiable to some extent? I have my mental limits. I've known people who far exceeded my limits. I do not know how many different ways the mind can manipulate information but I think the basics are pretty much set down. The low-hanging fruit of what are the most well defined measurements. Maybe one more Basic category is still undiscovered but I believe 80 percent or so has been properly defined. I just know it is not circular, the test does not define itself. Mental manipulation of information is a real thing. And different brain areas manipulate different information. The left Fronto-Partial Junction does analogical, inductive and deductive logic as measured by the subtest figure weights on the wais 4 in brain scan measurements. even though both parietal lobes do spatial processing the right brain is lateralized for drawing perspective more so than the left and the left for numbers.

 

[Ex-User (14663)]

@Animekitty So if you write new neural pathways by training your brain and thus become able to 'do more' - whatever the task at hand may be - are you also increasing your IQ? Or do you assume that intelligence is somehow separate from the neurology of the brain?

 

[Black Rose]

@Animekitty So if you write new neural pathways by training your brain and thus become able to 'do more' - whatever the task at hand may be - are you also increasing your IQ?

Crystalized but perhaps not fluid IQ.

 

[Black Rose]

Processing Speed is about input-output. The eyes scan for a pattern, recognize it then output a response. This is what I am not good at doing at least with arbitrary patterns I have not trained on. Training is cheating. Raw processing is starting off fast at the beginning. This is how video game champions or just good players play complex RTS games. (real-time strategy) With 50 characters on the screen at once.

I cannot play these games (at all) so I stick to open-ended games where puzzles can be solved with no time limit and with any combination of tools. I am good at combining things if they are 3d mechanical things and not just potions or card spells or engine parts. But real tools that are shaped to move and do real things. not stats. I am also good at talking to characters if real dialogue options are available. I like multiple story paths and getting into the heads of the characters motivations. Dialogs with 3 options with 3 words are simple and stupid (Deus Ex: Human Revolution). Like I said I like open-ended games. I am not fast and I am limited in remembering more than 4 items in my head at once. I use external references to remember an manipulate not really short-term memory. I try and use long-term memory as much as possible. Different ways to mentally manipulate information. I do not have good internal mental manipulation. (holding it in my head) I use long-term memory and eternal references instead.

The inability to play real strategy games is balanced by my ability to play games that are open-ended. Combination is a form of creativity. The difference between speed and language is still great enough that the discrepancy is clinically a disability. Can never figure out where to move the characters to win the RTS.

 

[Happy]

I’ve got to stop being lazy with explaining events. I was diagnosed with ADHD not from an interview alone, that was just screening. There was a few months of testing that followed, including testing my reaction to medication, etc.

I should have mentioned that earlier. I didn’t expect anyone to give enough of a shit to jump to any premature conclusions.

 

[Black Rose]

The eyes scan for a pattern, recognize it then output a response.

I talked to my doctor today and she agrees that I play video games slow but I think things through carefully. But it does mean I type messages slowly. My fingers having low dexterity does not help at all. But it still is amazing that tasks requiring completing them fast and my language understanding being 3 deviations apart should give me a learning disability. 3 standard deviations is 45 points that is huge. Normal disabilities require only 20 points. My doctor told me she would research the type of learning disability I have but a big part is mental clarity and simply being able to handle objects in my environment like in a video game. In 2009 my brother hit me because I was playing to slow. I know fast people, they learn fast they make things fast, they think fast. I am not fast so I do not do certain things that require speed to learn. And this means a lot of things I should learn I do not learn. Because it hurts my brain. The effort is too much. (sad emoticon) Learning is so slow I feel discouraged because I have to find everything myself. And I only know how to find things randomly.

My doctor is prescribing me 40 pills of Excedrin for headaches. She thinks it will help with my mental clarity

 

[Polaris]

I don’t think I have any specific learning disabilities, but I have always struggled with following instructions. Lab work, workshops and practicals have always been filled with anxiety and stress for that reason. Everyone just seemed to be able to do everything with such ease, while I would sit there and read the page over and over...the sequences just didn’t register to become a coherent whole in my head.

Somehow I still managed to pull through and often come out top of the class because I focused on accuracy and not speed. I was never good at rushing through things because I worried so much about missing important details. I think part of the issue is that I have hyper-focus, which means I get extremely frustrated and confused when several things happen at once. Multi tasking is impossible for me because I don't like how it compromises accuracy.

I also failed miserably at anything requiring sequences of motoric coordination during PE classes, while excelling at things like long distance running or swimming.

I don't know how to describe it other than feeling like I have a one-track brain.

Paradoxically, I seem to grasp theoretical concepts quickly. It's like all the bits just fall into their correct positions faster than I can register. It feels like my subconscious is working harder than my active brain. Which is weird, and I have spooked people because there is no way I can explain where I get my ideas from sometimes. I often do all the thinking before sleep. I think about some problem, lay it all out on a map and then stop to wait for the "lightbulb".

This process seems to be quite visual as I "see" the problem on a sort of inner retina. But I need peace and quiet to do this. Any interruptions can irritate me greatly, which is why I often have trouble with someone sleeping in my bed. They may feel put off when I get irritable, or I may overwhelm them with some idea that I have thought about.

I hate being like this sometimes.

 

[HDINTP]

I don’t think I have any specific learning disabilities, but I have always struggled with following instructions. Lab work, workshops and practicals have always been filled with anxiety and stress for that reason. Everyone just seemed to be able to do everything with such ease, while I would sit there and read the page over and over...the sequences just didn’t register to become a coherent whole in my head.

Somehow I still managed to pull through and often come out top of the class because I focused on accuracy and not speed. I was never good at rushing through things because I worried so much about missing important details. I think part of the issue is that I have hyper-focus, which means I get extremely frustrated and confused when several things happen at once. Multi tasking is impossible for me because I don't like how it compromises accuracy.

I also failed miserably at anything requiring sequences of motoric coordination during PE classes, while excelling at things like long distance running or swimming.

I don't know how to describe it other than feeling like I have a one-track brain.

Paradoxically, I seem to grasp theoretical concepts quickly. It's like all the bits just fall into their correct positions faster than I can register. It feels like my subconscious is working harder than my active brain. Which is weird, and I have spooked people because there is no way I can explain where I get my ideas from sometimes. I often do all the thinking before sleep. I think about some problem, lay it all out on a map and then stop to wait for the "lightbulb".

This process seems to be quite visual as I "see" the problem on a sort of inner retina. But I need peace and quiet to do this. Any interruptions can irritate me greatly, which is why I often have trouble with someone sleeping in my bed. They may feel put off when I get irritable, or I may overwhelm them with some idea that I have thought about.

I hate being like this sometimes.

Hmm I can relate quite a Lot to your Problem. Especially with Grasping concepts, Doing what most would see as "more difficult problem" - For instance in Mathematics with ease and then having diffulties explaining How I got there... As you say sort of subcocious. And with motor coordination as well with most activities...

Seems you got difficulty planning don't you think you could be Dyspraxic also...? Interestingly swimming's often their strength...

And about Lightbulb also I get absolutely what you mean so you are probably Global Learner anyway aren't you? I am (as pointed out in post somewhere above ) Auditory-Visual and also have Big Difficulties with Sequential tasks and spatial (external) while I rely on my auditory strenghts til I don't need to try really and when pressed go to my "Visualisation Mode" and there I do not feel pressed at all...

 

[Happy]

I don’t think I have any specific learning disabilities, but I have always struggled with following instructions. Lab work, workshops and practicals have always been filled with anxiety and stress for that reason. Everyone just seemed to be able to do everything with such ease, while I would sit there and read the page over and over...the sequences just didn’t register to become a coherent whole in my head.

Somehow I still managed to pull through and often come out top of the class because I focused on accuracy and not speed. I was never good at rushing through things because I worried so much about missing important details. I think part of the issue is that I have hyper-focus, which means I get extremely frustrated and confused when several things happen at once. Multi tasking is impossible for me because I don't like how it compromises accuracy.

I also failed miserably at anything requiring sequences of motoric coordination during PE classes, while excelling at things like long distance running or swimming.

I don't know how to describe it other than feeling like I have a one-track brain.

Paradoxically, I seem to grasp theoretical concepts quickly. It's like all the bits just fall into their correct positions faster than I can register. It feels like my subconscious is working harder than my active brain. Which is weird, and I have spooked people because there is no way I can explain where I get my ideas from sometimes. I often do all the thinking before sleep. I think about some problem, lay it all out on a map and then stop to wait for the "lightbulb".

This process seems to be quite visual as I "see" the problem on a sort of inner retina. But I need peace and quiet to do this. Any interruptions can irritate me greatly, which is why I often have trouble with someone sleeping in my bed. They may feel put off when I get irritable, or I may overwhelm them with some idea that I have thought about.

I hate being like this sometimes.

Just wanted to say I relate to this very strongly. Nothing noteworthy to add, other than I have developed a kind of learned sloppiness, where I’ve realised that in the sheer mass of shit to get through, things can’t always be perfect.

I relate very strongly to the lightbulb thing.

 

[Polaris]

Warning: long-ass post.

Hmm I can relate quite a Lot to your Problem. Especially with Grasping concepts, Doing what most would see as "more difficult problem" - For instance in Mathematics with ease and then having diffulties explaining How I got there... As you say sort of subcocious. And with motor coordination as well with most activities...

Seems you got difficulty planning don't you think you could be Dyspraxic also...? Interestingly swimming's often their strength...

And about Lightbulb also I get absolutely what you mean so you are probably Global Learner anyway aren't you? I am (as pointed out in post somewhere above ) Auditory-Visual and also have Big Difficulties with Sequential tasks and spatial (external) while I rely on my auditory strenghts til I don't need to try really and when pressed go to my "Visualisation Mode" and there I do not feel pressed at all...

Ok, interesting. Thanks for this. I had to search "Dyspraxia" and "Global Learner".

I had never seriously considered the learning styles before actually. I'm auditory/visual as well. I much prefer the lecture halls to the labs.

The math thing...

"Show your work"

The maths teacher would present some problem during a tutorial at uni, and I would typically blurt something out. She'd give me this curious look - as if I was some kind of freak. She'd come up to me afterwards and tell me she could not understand why I seemed to struggle so much with relatively simple tasks, while at the same time just blurting out solutions on a whim. She thought my problem was anxiety-based. I think she was right. Unpressured I can perform well, but what is the point.....? That is not going to help me get anywhere in reality.

That was some time ago, and I could probably do better if I could get organised. I get side-tracked too easily. There has been a certain amount of emotional upheaval, which doesn't help.

The shit that is called life with other humans.

In terms of the learning styles, I seem to be more in the Global/Intuitive camp. But I relate to the analytical style as well. I think it's a bit like the cognitive functions, hard to separate. I use a bit of everything, but have a preference for some, depending on context. I can see why intuitive types struggle in the largely sensor-based curricula.

I don't think I have dyspraxia. I never had speech developmental problems, or problems with fine motor skills such as holding a pen, writing, writing speed, etc. I generally am not affected in any of the ways described. But the swimming thing is interesting. Water was very liberating for me because of the feeling of weightlessness.

However. I may demonstrate some mild aspects of it dyspraxia. From Wiki:

"Various areas of development can be affected by developmental coordination disorder and these will persist into adulthood,[9] as DCD has no cure....
...In addition to the physical impairments, developmental coordination disorder is associated with problems with memory, especially working memory. This typically results in difficulty remembering instructions, difficulty organizing one's time and remembering deadlines, increased propensity to lose things or problems carrying out tasks which require remembering several steps in sequence (such as cooking)....However, many dyspraxics have excellent long-term memories, despite poor short-term memory."

I think I have a problem with short-term memory, but only applied to certain contexts.

For example, factual knowledge is only retained as far I find it interesting. However, when I started a geology course at uni, there was a historical component to the soil science unit, and I remembered the whole thing, dates, names, etc. So it depends on the context.

"Many dyspraxics benefit from working in a structured environment, as repeating the same routine minimises difficulty with time-management and allows them to commit procedures to long-term memory."

Yes, to some degree. However, routine can equally send me into complete oblivion where I may lose focus due to boredom. For example, checklist-based work and routine upgrades of product specifications (sequential, factual). Products themselves will only interest me as far as some momentary theory I might have concerning people's "need" for a product. I nosedive into deeper philosophical applications while the background is simultaneously trying to condition me to adapt to a more consumer-based mode of thinking. Checklists make me wanna kill, kill, kill, while other people seem to relish them. I only do them if it provides a break in the routine of the non-routine

"People with developmental coordination disorder sometimes have difficulty moderating the amount of sensory information that their body is constantly sending them, so as a result dyspraxics are prone to sensory overload and panic attacks.[17]"

Ok, that is interesting. I can relate to the sensory overload thing. For example, I find it extremely difficult to distinguish conversations when there is background noise, or several people are talking at once. I automatically tune out and cannot follow anything that is said. It can make me quite anxious because I feel isolated (existential undertones - hello again old friends). I avoid pubs and parties for that reason. I find them isolating, more than unifying. The isolatee being me, that is.

I have never experienced panic attacks because of it, but I may disappear to the bathroom frequently...

"Many dyspraxics struggle to distinguish left from right, even as adults, and have extremely poor sense of direction generally.[18]"

.....Do NOT give me a map or tell me to drive in x/y direction because I will do the exact opposite. If there is no relational concept that I can attach to said direction, I am lost, literally. Happened two days ago. I was walking around a new town to find a friend's place, and I ended up walking in the exact opposite direction because the map's real-world reference points were unknown to me. "The map is not the territory" is only a too-real concept to me.

"Moderate to extreme difficulty doing physical tasks is experienced by some dyspraxics, and fatigue is common because so much extra energy is expended while trying to execute physical movements correctly. "



"Some (but not all) dyspraxics suffer from hypotonia, low muscle tone, which like DCD can detrimentally affect balance."

Actually, no. My balance has always been good. I think because I was quite physically active as a child. I was interested in ballet and I climbed and jumped around a lot.

My hand-eye coordination is also good. My dad taught me to shoot. Because he was very good at explaining things in a way that made sense to me, I would hit target every time. It was easy, because you just had to follow these very logical steps. I think hyper-focus helped me here.

However, when I did an introductory course in Hip-Hop style dancing (lol, such delusion). I was the only one who constantly fucked everything up. It became so obvious and embarrassing that I had to quit.

Just wanted to say I relate to this very strongly. Nothing noteworthy to add, other than I have developed a kind of learned sloppiness, where I’ve realised that in the sheer mass of shit to get through, things can’t always be perfect.

I relate very strongly to the lightbulb thing.

Yes, you are right. I have trouble with perfection. Several people have tried to tell me that I have to be more relaxed about the way I do things. I get bogged down in details, while simultaneously getting more and more frustrated that I cannot just lay it all out according to the map in my head, because I have a very clear image of how it should look. I think this is because I absorb information in very large chunks, which then makes it difficult to organise in terms of output.

It's like there is a bottle-neck in my head. The information is about to explode, which causes a traffic jam and further blockage. The result is that words don't come out right, I stumble and skip steps, and I'm always in a great rush to get to the point because I'm very impatient. My old supervisor says I think faster than I write or speak, and it is true. I have a hundred thoughts in my head at once - and they don't come nicely lined up in a sequence. I have three projects that I am working on at the same time, and all this juggling is proving difficult with a sensor job that drains me of all physical and mental energy.

It's the price I pay for wanting everything to happen NOW. I want it all, but then get overwhelmed by things pulling me in multiple directions. I think I overestimate my ability to cope because other people seem to do it with such ease - why can't I be one of those people? I perhaps need to accept that I am not, but it isn't proven yet, so I persevere.

Impatience is going to kill me.

 

[Happy]

100% relate

 

[ArmedBackbone]

i learn much quicker on my own, it's hard for me to understand people who try to teach me anything, i need to skip that part, probably it's because i'm really impatient as well and unfocused...
i'm also not good at explaining what i know to other people
i'm really bad at theory
there are many disadvantages

 

[HDINTP]

I think I have a problem with short-term memory, but only applied to certain contexts.

Exactly. I am same. Actually I supposedly have awesome short-term working memory but it seems to only work for me in academia. Real-Life functioning - losing items, forgeting "simple things" etc. absolutely terrible. + that I really seem to have "RAM Based brain" mostly which means I work on something then stop and would forget "almost everythin" though I do pick up quite quick when I get back to it... It almost is "Rewind when woke up". I believe Cognisant described something Really simillar in one of his posts (could be few years since I read it...). And it Truly Shocked me in it's similarity back then...

 

[Pizzabeak]

I'm pretty much slightly above to above average in most things but tend to have trouble paying attention so could actually have ADD/ADHD. But I might not. Since I started smoking pot is around the same time I was getting older so it's hard to tell if the weed/hash use has affected my brain at all or if it's age. Even in class sober I can barely pay attention because I just think off on tangents with references to creative useless trivia and shit. But I snap back. If I'm stoned it's just hard to pay attention. I'd rather read sober than stoned because it's faster. Marijuana just makes you think deeper and slower or longer, or can give you racing thoughts. People think I'm only INTP because I smoked pot. Weed can make people quiet, so they disregard type and it changes how you think, so it gives people more freedom to be what and how they want.
I wouldn't necessarily use it unless you do already, then you understand. LSD isn't really psychedelic but it's what people's popular idea of what a psychedelic should be (gives racing thoughts, some visual distortion; etc). But that isn't true at all. LSD (lysergic acid diethylamide) is in America known as METH-LAD, because there's a methyl group (CH3) on the 6 position nitrogen atom. So if you put an ethyl (C2H5) it's ETH-LAD - they're norlysergic acid diethylamide analogues (alkylated on the 6 N) - I wouldn't particularly use the term designer drug, as it's mainstream and pejorative. Acid is more like a stimulant than anything else, but it is psychedelic at high doses and can be pretty DMT like (which is psychedelic), so it basically is (entheogenic). I wouldn't use it man, but am just saying they microdose it (I don't really) and it could work as an antidepressant or some kind of work enhancer if you take it in small enough doses so it isn't noticeable. And psilocybin (the active ingredient in magic mushrooms) has been shown to be able to grow new brain cells and regenerate tissue. Maybe it could be related to that?
There's also PRO-LAD, which if you haven't guessed, has a propyl group (C3H7) instead of acid's methyl, and they say it's better for humor. It's basically not like LSD, which in some circles is considered the standard for a psychedelic trip (marijuana is a "mild psychedelic" and has a kind of synergy with LSD). I haven't tried it, and psychedelics don't really help. I don't do or condone drugs, I just think the psychedelics are interesting. And they weren't banned in the 60's so people were using them before they couldn't research it anymore.
What you really probably need is caffeine or ADD meds? ADD/ADHD meds are just amphetamine and methamphetamine, which is just the former with a methyl group on it. And MDMA (3,4-methylenedioxy-methamphetamine) and mescaline (3,4,5-trimethoxyphenethylamine) are both "psychedelic stimulants". At first it just seems like they might only be "party medicines" and used as social tools, and they don't necessarily make you smarter. They could point you in the right direction.
Really, what you probably need is to just study more. My own grades can improve if I did that. Unfortunately, it can be hard to find the time for all the studying, being as busy as I can be, but it is manageable. You just have to cut all the nonsense out of your life. So feel free to defend your well being. Life is really just a civilized way of removing your enemies at this point. All you really want to do is start a family to support with the nice work you do as a man. Technology constantly changes the industries. You can't get by without doing the best you can in your day to day routines.

 

[HDINTP]

I'm pretty much slightly above to above average in most things but tend to have trouble paying attention so could actually have ADD/ADHD. But I might not. Since I started smoking pot is around the same time I was getting older so it's hard to tell if the weed/hash use has affected my brain at all or if it's age. Even in class sober I can barely pay attention because I just think off on tangents with references to creative useless trivia and shit. But I snap back. If I'm stoned it's just hard to pay attention. I'd rather read sober than stoned because it's faster. Marijuana just makes you think deeper and slower or longer, or can give you racing thoughts. People think I'm only INTP because I smoked pot. Weed can make people quiet, so they disregard type and it changes how you think, so it gives people more freedom to be what and how they want.
I wouldn't necessarily use it unless you do already, then you understand. LSD isn't really psychedelic but it's what people's popular idea of what a psychedelic should be (gives racing thoughts, some visual distortion; etc). But that isn't true at all. LSD (lysergic acid diethylamide) is in America known as METH-LAD, because there's a methyl group (CH3) on the 6 position nitrogen atom. So if you put an ethyl (C2H5) it's ETH-LAD - they're norlysergic acid diethylamide analogues (alkylated on the 6 N) - I wouldn't particularly use the term designer drug, as it's mainstream and pejorative. Acid is more like a stimulant than anything else, but it is psychedelic at high doses and can be pretty DMT like (which is psychedelic), so it basically is (entheogenic). I wouldn't use it man, but am just saying they microdose it (I don't really) and it could work as an antidepressant or some kind of work enhancer if you take it in small enough doses so it isn't noticeable. And psilocybin (the active ingredient in magic mushrooms) has been shown to be able to grow new brain cells and regenerate tissue. Maybe it could be related to that?
There's also PRO-LAD, which if you haven't guessed, has a propyl group (C3H7) instead of acid's methyl, and they say it's better for humor. It's basically not like LSD, which in some circles is considered the standard for a psychedelic trip (marijuana is a "mild psychedelic" and has a kind of synergy with LSD). I haven't tried it, and psychedelics don't really help. I don't do or condone drugs, I just think the psychedelics are interesting. And they weren't banned in the 60's so people were using them before they couldn't research it anymore.
What you really probably need is caffeine or ADD meds? ADD/ADHD meds are just amphetamine and methamphetamine, which is just the former with a methyl group on it. And MDMA (3,4-methylenedioxy-methamphetamine) and mescaline (3,4,5-trimethoxyphenethylamine) are both "psychedelic stimulants". At first it just seems like they might only be "party medicines" and used as social tools, and they don't necessarily make you smarter. They could point you in the right direction.
Really, what you probably need is to just study more. My own grades can improve if I did that. Unfortunately, it can be hard to find the time for all the studying, being as busy as I can be, but it is manageable. You just have to cut all the nonsense out of your life. So feel free to defend your well being. Life is really just a civilized way of removing your enemies at this point. All you really want to do is start a family to support with the nice work you do as a man. Technology constantly changes the industries. You can't get by without doing the best you can in your day to day routines.

Haha Drug of my choice has always been alcohol. Never smoked and don't plan to. With ADHD I am not sure as with other two LD's. I am extremely happy I was put off meds very early since I believe it worked as cocaine...

Yes I should study more.

I refuse to accept Life as a form of fight for something and would never push myself to the limit. Be it studying, career, relationships. Just lead a calm life and have my freedom mostly. Not rushing at all.

And even though I want/will probably have my own family it is a fact for me that I am not "Man for a (usual) Family Life". So I'll just have an unusual one more than in tune with that...

ahh I would forget as for coffeine. It could be the opposite. Well it would stimulate you but don't you feel when the effect passes you'll be just more/again tired? So not for long-runs really. Try method of "Jumping between Materials". Have heard something like that and even though I am not sure about my ADHD still like this idea...