When a female INTP reveals herself.

[BigApplePi]

Originally Posted by eyeseecold
I agree that we shouldn't have to beat [how about feel?] around the bush, or that we shouldn't have to spend time & money on useless social rituals

:The bold still applies

There is something worse than not getting laid. That's getting laid and not getting any repeats.

Why not take on a social ritual or two just to check out eligibility for replays?

 

[PhoenixRising]

There is something worse than not getting laid. That's getting laid and not getting any repeats.

Why not take on a social ritual or two just to check out eligibility for replays?

I suppose you could take on a social ritual. But the women who will most likely respond to it are those who you won't be able to relate with, and therefore won't get anything out of your interaction except sex. And as I said before, the prospect of reproducing with these types of women brings problems on its own.

 

[ememisya]

I suppose you could take on a social ritual. But the women who will most likely respond to it are those who you won't be able to relate with, and therefore won't get anything out of your interaction except sex. And as I said before, the prospect of reproducing with these types of women brings problems on its own.

Tell me about it. The dumb blonde has been hot for too long I say! But my curse is I tend to find the most testosterone driven lady out there who smashes her problems away, and proceed to worship her. Who generally tends to be the type of girl who tells you about her ride home for 3 hours and all the people she honked at. I'm cursed I tell you.


@BigApplePi

Sounds like you have problems with letting go. I wholeheartedly agree, and I bet you will never forget that first love. But there comes a time in one's life when really the only rational thing to do is to get laid, even if just once, and you don't even got the phone number. (Source: Pon farr)

 

[MissQuote]

I suppose you could take on a social ritual. But the women who will most likely respond to it are those who you won't be able to relate with, and therefore won't get anything out of your interaction except sex. And as I said before, the prospect of reproducing with these types of women brings problems on its own.

So far this thread has established that men are pretty much only looking for sex.

Or wait, maybe we established that men shouldn't need to be nice when looking for sex.

No, I'm not sure that is it either, maybe it was that if they knock up a girl that likes to be treated nice they shouldn't pay child support because she is lazy and naggy and dumb.


I'm confused at this point.

heading back over to my other forum where we are trying to talk our resident socially anxious gay friend into the fact that it is Okay to not be afraid of the guy he is crushing on's roommates and go get that gang bang on already. That makes more sense than any of this at this point.

 

[ememisya]

So far this thread has established that men are pretty much only looking for sex.

Or wait, maybe we established that men shouldn't need to be nice when looking for sex.

No, I'm not sure that is it either, maybe it was that if they knock up a girl that likes to be treated nice they shouldn't pay child support because she is lazy and naggy and dumb.


I'm confused at this point.

heading back over to my other forum where we are trying to talk our resident socially anxious gay friend into the fact that it is Okay to not be afraid of the guy he is crushing on's roommates and go get that gang bang on already. That makes more sense than any of this at this point.

Yea, there is nothing to establish about any sexual ritual other than it involving naughty parts (Yes I just said that). It's definitely an interesting topic though, especially behind a computer screen Now go help your friend come out of the closet

 

[BigApplePi]

Sounds like you have problems with letting go. I wholeheartedly agree, and I bet you will never forget that first love. But there comes a time in one's life when really the only rational thing to do is to get laid, even if just once, and you don't even got the phone number. (Source: Pon farr)

@ememisya

Now wait a minute. Is the male goal only one thing? There are all kinds of relationships. The one-timer to play around, the first love to remember, the girlfriend when you need to hang out and don't know where either of you are going, the one you want around forever. It doesn't have to be just one.

 

[DeadonDreaming]

So far this thread has established that men are pretty much only looking for sex.

Or wait, maybe we established that men shouldn't need to be nice when looking for sex.

No, I'm not sure that is it either, maybe it was that if they knock up a girl that likes to be treated nice they shouldn't pay child support because she is lazy and naggy and dumb.


I'm confused at this point.

heading back over to my other forum where we are trying to talk our resident socially anxious gay friend into the fact that it is Okay to not be afraid of the guy he is crushing on's roommates and go get that gang bang on already. That makes more sense than any of this at this point.

I used to not be only looking for sex, but I'm at a time I'm in my life where I've been through almost half a dozen relationships in the past 2 years, and feel like I'm not really ready or into another one. I think it would be unfair to anyone to offer them anything more than a "steady friends with benefits" type thing. I had a situation like that about a year ago, where a person I had only known for a couple weeks in very detached friendly way came straight to me and asked if I "wanted to have sexual relations?" with no strings attached, and it seems to be the best for both parties who have the need for their own space and have had relationship problems in the past. I'm not saying a relationship can't develop, but honestly I have to say up front that I'm just looking for sex at the moment. I think its a mature way to approach things.

 

[redbaron]

Well I read not liking/disapproving of "fake-ness, chivalry, courtship, empty social behavior ", you don't really get far(e.g. comfortable, reciprocal) without any of that.

On this point we disagree.

Anyone who isn't receptive to you when you're being honest isn't a person to pursue. All good relationships of mine started with honesty really.

Fake behaviour sets an expectation, which obviously is either unrealistic or you're unwilling to continue.

Maybe you initially turn more people off by being direct and honest, but if that's who you are and they don't like it, it's for the best that you aren't keeping up the illusion that the two of you are compatible.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

On this point we disagree.

Anyone who isn't receptive to you when you're being honest isn't a person to pursue. All good relationships of mine started with honesty really.

Fake behaviour sets an expectation, which obviously is either unrealistic or you're unwilling to continue.

Maybe you initially turn more people off by being direct and honest, but if that's who you are and they don't like it, it's for the best that you aren't keeping up the illusion that the two of you are compatible.

That was unnecessary, I'm not arguing against "being yourself" or anything in the pursuit of a relationship. I was saying that to get to know people, or to even function in society, you have to step outside of your ego and the core of who you really are, and engage in behavior that you might not even want to do but understand as compulsory. For example, getting a job, paying taxes, minding your supervisors, etc. At least to some minimal extent, people aren't always being direct with their intentions or following their hearts(whatever that means), and they put aside their egos to integrate in society.

How do you even meet anyone? You attend some social function(college, concerts, forums, parties etc). So basically, even if you're not very social, and don't like gatherings, you still have to socialize to meet someone. If you understand that perspective and agree, then we're not really arguing about anything.

 

[redbaron]

So basically, even if you're not very social, and don't like gatherings, you still have to socialize to meet someone. If you understand that perspective and agree, then we're not really arguing about anything.

That wasn't your initial contention.

Plus it's not like I (or anyone) can disagree with that point. You're saying that to meet someone you need to socialize. Meeting someone is socializing in itself. I don't understand what point you're trying to make by pointing this out?

My disagreement was with:

"fake-ness, chivalry, courtship, empty social behavior ", you don't really get far(e.g. comfortable, reciprocal) without any of that.

I am specifically disagreeing that you need to engage in any form of empty or fake behaviours, deliberate chivalry or courtship.

As far as I'm concerned, two people engaging in conversation with and finding mutual interest in one another is not fake or empty behaviour. Nor is it chivalrous or a form of courtship to simply have a decent conversation with someone where it turns out you have common beliefs and ideals, or perhaps not but you both take interest in and respect the ideas of the other person.

To avoid confusion, can you give a specific example of the fake behaviour you're saying is necessary? Because I can't think of any.

 

[Tc76]

My point of posting the questions wasn't 'Flamebait'. I seen a behavior, thought about it and figured that, though must of us had a personal view about it, no one had talked about it before. Now we have a good idea where our fellow forum members stand and why and if nothing else a provoking discussion. Beyond that... If my language took you somewhere else...well, your giving me way to much crdit there.

 

[ememisya]

My point of posting the questions wasn't 'Flamebait'. I seen a behavior, thought about it and figured that, though must of us had a personal view about it, no one had talked about it before. Now we have a good idea where our fellow forum members stand and why and if nothing else a provoking discussion. Beyond that... If my language took you somewhere else...well, your giving me way to much crdit there.

What are you talking about? I was merely describing the progression of replies on this thread and how it easily fit into a flamebait category which would be best described by slashdot.org. My mind was on female INTPs revealing themselves and aside from that you mentioning boobs.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

@redbaron

That wasn't your initial contention.

Plus it's not like I (or anyone) can disagree with that point. You're saying that to meet someone you need to socialize. Meeting someone is socializing in itself. I don't understand what point you're trying to make by pointing this out?

My disagreement was with:



I am specifically disagreeing that you need to engage in any form of empty or fake behaviours, deliberate chivalry or courtship.

As far as I'm concerned, two people engaging in conversation with and finding mutual interest in one another is not fake or empty behaviour. Nor is it chivalrous or a form of courtship to simply have a decent conversation with someone where it turns out you have common beliefs and ideals, or perhaps not but you both take interest in and respect the ideas of the other person.

To avoid confusion, can you give a specific example of the fake behaviour you're saying is necessary? Because I can't think of any.

I think we're spiraling into ever-increasing irrelevance and misunderstanding.

Phoenix made a post, a part of which I found controversial, but after clarification realized that I misunderstood the meaning. Along with your joining, the topic became focused on authenticity, being yourself etc which was never my point and something I never disagreed with. At the end of the day, I was only against the idea that it's rational for males to pursue females in a tactless manner, but again I misunderstood the way Phoenix meant it.

I'm sending the rest to your wall because it's getting offtopic.

EDIT: lol I realize I basically mean smalltalk.

 

[Hawkeye]

Since this thread's creation, I've come to realise that at times, I assign a gender to a poster. Sometimes it's male and sometimes it's female. I'm still trying to figure out my reasoning for such assignments. Possibly because talking to an imaginary hazy cloud of stuff irritates me.

It doesn't affect the way I type to them though.

 

[DeadonDreaming]

I have no idea where this thread went.

 

[HDINTP]

Reading though the posts here I’m always amused with the comments that follow when a female INTP shares her gender. The ‘Holy Crap you’re a girl!?’ reaction. I wonder if it’s our sexism, ego or our social upbringing that makes males assume we have the monopoly on the mind and intelligence.
With that thought.
Ladies, do you consciously not advertise this for the above reasons or something else.
As a side note, a female INTP is dangerous…think about it lol.

If they were dangerous I would love it.

 

[redbaron]

I have no idea where this thread went.

It sucked, derailing it made it more interesting than before