ssmith3427
Redshirt
- Local time
- Today 6:29 PM
- Joined
- Dec 5, 2015
- Messages
- 4
Please help me help my wife
Allison has had some type of social anxiety her entire life, since the day she was born. As a baby, whenever she would come close to any other human, she would start shaking and crying. As a child she was always extremely quiet and shy and nervous. In social situations she always had the rapid heart beat, loss of breath, blood rushing to the face feeling, excessive sweating, etc.
High school was the same situation, she kept to herself in order to avoid the anxiety, but she did have friends who she socialized with and was okay with. Every lunchtime at school she would need to walk into the cafeteria with her friends - if her friends were already seated inside, she’d call home almost in tears and having a slight panic attack, and get her mom to pick her up, as the anxiety and stress of walking in alone and trying to find where her friends were seated was too much.
In her first year of University, she had a roommate, and her roommate was extremely popular and outgoing and because Allison hung out with her roommate, this boosted Allison’s confidence and made her feel cooler, and in turn decreased her anxiety. Allison was a big partier that year, going to parties drinking twice a week and hanging out with the ‘coolest’ and most confident people there. Although she still had anxiety all the time, it was greatly decreased because of this, as her confidence and self-esteem had increased because she associated herself as one of these popular cool people, which she has always strived to be her whole life. But the anxiety was still there, for example if she was going to class and she has to walk into the classroom even 1 minute late, she would just avoid the class and be too scared to go. Another example is for every single class, she always got there 20 minutes early, because getting there within 5 mins of class starting caused her great anxiety in the sense that she didn’t know if she’d be able to find a seat, if they’d all be taken and she’d look dumb for trying to find where to sit.
Within the last few years her anxiety had been very high. In April 2013 she went on Zoloft, which helped at a dose of 100mg. She had always been a happy person, and the Zoloft made her a little bit happier and much more calm. She said in many situations that it helped calm her physical symptoms ie. racing heart, loss of breath, etc. It helped her get through school for graphic design and do presentations. She said she felt a normal amount of nervousness that a normal person would feel, instead of the extreme anxiety that she would normally get. However, Zoloft was making her gain quite a bit of weight, and made her acne very bad as well. So she came off Zoloft in February 2015.
It is also important to note that from Sept. to December 2015 she did CBT. It helped slightly. Around this time she also went to an endocrinologist. The most significant points are - Androstenedione 18.9 (average in normal person 1.5 - 11.50 mmol/L), Creatine 14.3 (average in normal person 6.3 - 13., mmol/d), and Dopamine 3135 (average in normal person <2600 mmol/d). Note 1, she was on Zolofat for almost 2 years while this test was conducted. Note 2, no seratonin test conducted. Note 3, could she be Dopamine dominant from birth?
Since she has stopped taking Zoloft, her life has spiralled downward. She had become depressed, which she’s never felt anything like in her entire life. She lost interest in things she used to enjoy, she had nothing to look forward to. A lot of this depression was actually caused by her work as a freelance graphic designer. She couldn’t handle the stress of the clients, the clients needs and demands and how they always needed things done asap. She also nearly had a heart attack every single time she would just check her email, because she didn’t know if there would be an email from a client saying they didn’t like her work, or what revisions needed to be done, or if they wanted to talk on the phone. She couldn’t deal with speaking to clients on the phone or meeting up in person, and to be honest even emailing them back. These situations caused her such great anxiety that she was constantly overwhelmed and absolutely hated life.
She went back to the doctor in May 2015 to get a different medication that didn’t cause weight gain- Wellbutrin. She was on 100mg of Wellbutrin, which ended up just increasing her anxiety and made her angry all the time - which is completely opposite of her personality. The immense agitation set her off and the smallest things. She stopped taking Wellbutrin in July 2015. I've no idea why Zoloft worked to an extent, yet Wellbutrin has such a negative effect?
Since then, she had completely stopped working and took that major stress and cause of hating life out of the picture. She feels like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders since she has stopped working. However, even a single client email she reads now puts her right back to how she felt back then. Her anxiety is still very high, in any type of social situation at all her heart races, loss of breath, weak knees, crazy sweating. She always feels like she’s in fight or flight mode, high adrenaline. And the mental thinking part of it is actually worse now than ever before. She has always had the racing thoughts, negative thoughts (while she was on Zoloft the thoughts were more positive, but she still had negative ones). She will constantly have thoughts going through her head like “what are these people thinking of me”, “do they think I’m sitting properly or should I lean in a different direction?”, “should i say hi to this person or will they think I’m weird? Will I come across as rude if I don’t say hi?” These thoughts are constantly swirling around in her head and she can’t stop thinking them. Her thoughts are all basically about how people perceive her, and how they are judging her. She can’t stand the thought of someone judging her in a negative light. In addition she has low self-esteem. She always feels inferior to others. When talking with others, she is 20% focussing on what she is saying, and 80% focussing on how she is coming across - how the other person is perceiving what she is saying.
In addition, when she goes out with her friends she is able to put on this super friendly, super outgoing front. We think it's because she's got so much adrenaline at the time, that it's allowing her to be able to put on this alternate version of herself with no problem at all. It's hard to describe.
Overall problems:
- social anxiety
- constant negative thoughts
- low self-esteem
- minor depression
- needs validation from others in order to be happy and confident (example many people liking her new facebook profile picture will make her feel great and can change her mood right around)
- zero libido (has never had one)
- joint pain (knees, ankles, back)
- plantar faciatis
- hiperhydrosis
- acne
Current Treatment:
- no medication
- exercise 30 minutes every day
- glutin free, dairy free healthy eating plan
- meditation every two days
- plan on seeing a natruopath within the next month
All in all I am looking for different solutions to try and help my wife with her anxiety, be it different medication or alternative lifestyle choices I can implement for my wife. Recommendations are all very welcomed. Thank you!
Allison has had some type of social anxiety her entire life, since the day she was born. As a baby, whenever she would come close to any other human, she would start shaking and crying. As a child she was always extremely quiet and shy and nervous. In social situations she always had the rapid heart beat, loss of breath, blood rushing to the face feeling, excessive sweating, etc.
High school was the same situation, she kept to herself in order to avoid the anxiety, but she did have friends who she socialized with and was okay with. Every lunchtime at school she would need to walk into the cafeteria with her friends - if her friends were already seated inside, she’d call home almost in tears and having a slight panic attack, and get her mom to pick her up, as the anxiety and stress of walking in alone and trying to find where her friends were seated was too much.
In her first year of University, she had a roommate, and her roommate was extremely popular and outgoing and because Allison hung out with her roommate, this boosted Allison’s confidence and made her feel cooler, and in turn decreased her anxiety. Allison was a big partier that year, going to parties drinking twice a week and hanging out with the ‘coolest’ and most confident people there. Although she still had anxiety all the time, it was greatly decreased because of this, as her confidence and self-esteem had increased because she associated herself as one of these popular cool people, which she has always strived to be her whole life. But the anxiety was still there, for example if she was going to class and she has to walk into the classroom even 1 minute late, she would just avoid the class and be too scared to go. Another example is for every single class, she always got there 20 minutes early, because getting there within 5 mins of class starting caused her great anxiety in the sense that she didn’t know if she’d be able to find a seat, if they’d all be taken and she’d look dumb for trying to find where to sit.
Within the last few years her anxiety had been very high. In April 2013 she went on Zoloft, which helped at a dose of 100mg. She had always been a happy person, and the Zoloft made her a little bit happier and much more calm. She said in many situations that it helped calm her physical symptoms ie. racing heart, loss of breath, etc. It helped her get through school for graphic design and do presentations. She said she felt a normal amount of nervousness that a normal person would feel, instead of the extreme anxiety that she would normally get. However, Zoloft was making her gain quite a bit of weight, and made her acne very bad as well. So she came off Zoloft in February 2015.
It is also important to note that from Sept. to December 2015 she did CBT. It helped slightly. Around this time she also went to an endocrinologist. The most significant points are - Androstenedione 18.9 (average in normal person 1.5 - 11.50 mmol/L), Creatine 14.3 (average in normal person 6.3 - 13., mmol/d), and Dopamine 3135 (average in normal person <2600 mmol/d). Note 1, she was on Zolofat for almost 2 years while this test was conducted. Note 2, no seratonin test conducted. Note 3, could she be Dopamine dominant from birth?
Since she has stopped taking Zoloft, her life has spiralled downward. She had become depressed, which she’s never felt anything like in her entire life. She lost interest in things she used to enjoy, she had nothing to look forward to. A lot of this depression was actually caused by her work as a freelance graphic designer. She couldn’t handle the stress of the clients, the clients needs and demands and how they always needed things done asap. She also nearly had a heart attack every single time she would just check her email, because she didn’t know if there would be an email from a client saying they didn’t like her work, or what revisions needed to be done, or if they wanted to talk on the phone. She couldn’t deal with speaking to clients on the phone or meeting up in person, and to be honest even emailing them back. These situations caused her such great anxiety that she was constantly overwhelmed and absolutely hated life.
She went back to the doctor in May 2015 to get a different medication that didn’t cause weight gain- Wellbutrin. She was on 100mg of Wellbutrin, which ended up just increasing her anxiety and made her angry all the time - which is completely opposite of her personality. The immense agitation set her off and the smallest things. She stopped taking Wellbutrin in July 2015. I've no idea why Zoloft worked to an extent, yet Wellbutrin has such a negative effect?
Since then, she had completely stopped working and took that major stress and cause of hating life out of the picture. She feels like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders since she has stopped working. However, even a single client email she reads now puts her right back to how she felt back then. Her anxiety is still very high, in any type of social situation at all her heart races, loss of breath, weak knees, crazy sweating. She always feels like she’s in fight or flight mode, high adrenaline. And the mental thinking part of it is actually worse now than ever before. She has always had the racing thoughts, negative thoughts (while she was on Zoloft the thoughts were more positive, but she still had negative ones). She will constantly have thoughts going through her head like “what are these people thinking of me”, “do they think I’m sitting properly or should I lean in a different direction?”, “should i say hi to this person or will they think I’m weird? Will I come across as rude if I don’t say hi?” These thoughts are constantly swirling around in her head and she can’t stop thinking them. Her thoughts are all basically about how people perceive her, and how they are judging her. She can’t stand the thought of someone judging her in a negative light. In addition she has low self-esteem. She always feels inferior to others. When talking with others, she is 20% focussing on what she is saying, and 80% focussing on how she is coming across - how the other person is perceiving what she is saying.
In addition, when she goes out with her friends she is able to put on this super friendly, super outgoing front. We think it's because she's got so much adrenaline at the time, that it's allowing her to be able to put on this alternate version of herself with no problem at all. It's hard to describe.
Overall problems:
- social anxiety
- constant negative thoughts
- low self-esteem
- minor depression
- needs validation from others in order to be happy and confident (example many people liking her new facebook profile picture will make her feel great and can change her mood right around)
- zero libido (has never had one)
- joint pain (knees, ankles, back)
- plantar faciatis
- hiperhydrosis
- acne
Current Treatment:
- no medication
- exercise 30 minutes every day
- glutin free, dairy free healthy eating plan
- meditation every two days
- plan on seeing a natruopath within the next month
All in all I am looking for different solutions to try and help my wife with her anxiety, be it different medication or alternative lifestyle choices I can implement for my wife. Recommendations are all very welcomed. Thank you!
Thanks for the input!
