Misinterpre-f*cking-tation.

[Wolfpine]

It sucks. It pervades nearly every aspect of your social life, at worst ruining friendships and at best existing in and of itself as a frustration.

Language is fallible. People are subjective, and most can't even communicate reasonably. Judgments solidify, and values differ. That's only good if others were open to different value systems/ways of living/explanations for a variety of things, but most frankly aren't.

Understanding only goes so far as can be fathomed by the system in which the receiver functions, which changes for each individual. This is a base flaw in human reasoning, as each person's experience is their own and therefore cannot be judged by another without identical experiences; the actual living is what leads to understanding.

It'd be a lot nicer if judgment were not so conditional and arbitrary on an objective level. Or I wish I could articulate effectively to the masses to get the intended meaning of my words across. Being misinterpreted leads directly to introversion, I would presume, whether one chooses this or not.

I'm sure it's an INTP default to have difficulty being understood by the SJ world? Well, such is life. Anyone have a solution?

 

[SpaceYeti]

The solution is to get familiar with your language, communicate accurately and know that when other people don't get it they don't get it. You did nothing wrong. Always try to say things the way people will understand. Avoid jargon, avoid big words, just say it.

 

[Andropov]

Why didn't you just say fuck?

 

[Bird]

Why didn't you just say fuck?

Not everyone is into giving up (; .

 

[Architectonic]

The solution is to get familiar with your language, communicate accurately and know that when other people don't get it they don't get it.

The point is that it isn't that simple. Or are you trying to be ironic?

 

[Jesse]

Isn't a point of friendship trying to understand each other.

 

[CoryJames]

The point is that it isn't that simple. Or are you trying to be ironic?

As much as I hate to be on TrollYeti's side of an argument....

No, the point is not that simple. The point is inherently far too complex/ubiquitous (as OP pointed out) for the existence of a true solution. One's best bet is to learn to deal and try to communicate in a way that is concise and straightforward, with as little room for confusion and misinterpretation as possible.

I feel like that is what SpaceYeti was trying to say.

 

[SilentChaos]

I can assure you that I experience similar frustrations, it is often so bad that I wonder what person my friends think i am because it is not me.. it is their misjudgments of me.

In my mind there are the most wonderful ideas when I attempt to convey them the meaning fades, my idea is just judged quickly a new meaning is assigned to it. I spend about a year trying to simplify my thoughts; trying to explain my theories in detail for understanding purposes, it was all very much without successes.

I noticed something else at around the same time, that the questions worth asking are the ones that wouldn’t be understood, it is the same with your thoughts the ones worth sharing are the ones that cannot be shared.

I think a possibly solution to this is to not just come out and give your best explanation of your thoughts. For understanding true understanding grows from the seed of experience, so why not weave your own thoughts into someone else’s experience... Let them work it out themselves, little hints things that are impossible to misjudge, one must be clever. Of course this is all in the theoretical sense; I have not yet put any of this into practice.


I’m a little skeptical of my theory, keep in mind that these are raw thoughts; I have not yet perfected them. If you are hoping for universal understanding it is impossible, for one person to understand a complex idea in as much depth as you do... perhaps it is possible?

(i bet this all makes no sense at all lols)

 

[Wolfpine]

I can assure you that I experience similar frustrations, it is often so bad that I wonder what person my friends think i am because it is not me.. it is their misjudgments of me.

In my mind there are the most wonderful ideas when I attempt to convey them the meaning fades, my idea is just judged quickly a new meaning is assigned to it. I spend about a year trying to simplify my thoughts; trying to explain my theories in detail for understanding purposes, it was all very much without successes.

I noticed something else at around the same time, that the questions worth asking are the ones that wouldn’t be understood, it is the same with your thoughts the ones worth sharing are the ones that cannot be shared.

I think a possibly solution to this is to not just come out and give your best explanation of your thoughts. For understanding true understanding grows from the seed of experience, so why not weave your own thoughts into someone else’s experience... Let them work it out themselves, little hints things that are impossible to misjudge, one must be clever. Of course this is all in the theoretical sense; I have not yet put any of this into practice.


I’m a little skeptical of my theory, keep in mind that these are raw thoughts; I have not yet perfected them. If you are hoping for universal understanding it is impossible, for one person to understand a complex idea in as much depth as you do... perhaps it is possible?

(i bet this all makes no sense at all lols)

It actually makes perfect sense. It's like making a poem out of how you present yourself to others. Subtly affect them, but do not try to explain yourself, as this never works (I also know from experience). Good idea, definitely. Impress your impressions in a way that conveys the impression you give yourself in how you communicate.

 

[MatthewSawyer]

For understanding true understanding grows from the seed of experience, so why not weave your own thoughts into someone else’s experience...

I’m a little skeptical of my theory, keep in mind that these are raw thoughts; I have not yet perfected them. If you are hoping for universal understanding it is impossible, for one person to understand a complex idea in as much depth as you do... perhaps it is possible?

To a great degree, I agree with your "little theory."

As to the original post, I don't know what else I can add (of value). I can add this though:

I think, to a great degree, the world (in which we live) is a great cosmic joke. Depending on my mood, I either laugh, or cry over it. I agree with you that a lot of "interpretation" is relative, to a small degree from person to person, and to a great degree, culture to culture. I see a reasonable person as being presented with a couple options. First, if misinterpretation is what's nagging at you, you could learn the system and manipulate it so that you can get the experiences, or pleasures or "whatever" you desire from it. Perhaps an appropriate example would be the education system. If perhaps your primary desire is to minimize frustrations on yourself, another option I see is taking the path of least resistance. Perhaps an example would be limiting exposure to the system to areas that are legitimately of interest to you. A more concrete (and personal) example: I have a very small group of people within which I socialize. I legitimately like these people and find the experiences we share rewarding.

Cheers.

 

[Wolfpine]

I think, to a great degree, the world (in which we live) is a great cosmic joke. Depending on my mood, I either laugh, or cry over it.

Same. This reminds me of a quote from Voltaire, "To the feeling person, life is a tragedy; to the thinking person, it is a comedy".

I also agree with all else you said (to a great degree). Idealistically, of course, I wish people as a whole could grasp the importance of perspective, and were a bit more interested in understanding the perspectives of others.

 

[Architectonic]

The point is inherently far too complex/ubiquitous (as OP pointed out) for the existence of a true solution. One's best bet is to learn to deal and try to communicate in a way that is concise and straightforward, with as little room for confusion and misinterpretation as possible.

But that advice is incomplete at best...

Perhaps it is better to accept the fact that there will be some misunderstanding and miscommunication.

 

[walfin]

One day you will be glad of the possibility of misinterpretation.

 

[Skinart]

I don't think it is limited to language. Even when people clearly understand the words and concepts coming out of your mouth, they aren't going to accurately gauge whether or not they are your beliefs. There are always going to be people who think that the crazy things you think up and mention imply a crazy twisted evil mind. At least, that's my present theory as to why people I know seem to have come to the conclusions they seem to have come to about me.

It must be a terrible thing to be slave to one's ideas the way they must be to assume I am.

 

[CoryJames]

But that advice is incomplete at best...

Perhaps it is better to accept the fact that there will be some misunderstanding and miscommunication.

A point I tried to convey in "learn to deal"...?

 

[kuranes]

I read a science fiction story recently that talked about a researcher trying to find scientific explanations for what are typically called "ghosts". But he didn't want to use the word "ghosts" because it had so many connotations that were loaded. Opponents would likely react to what their idea of a ghost was, versus him trying to compare the "phenomena" to a thermocouple - something that unexplainably ( as yet ) converts heat into light and therefore generates the "chill" normally associated with spectres ( spectrum ? ). So that one would get caught up in discussions such as "Ghosts violate the Law of Conservation of Energy" and "Psychics and Mediums are all hoaxers" instead of arguing on the same page. It wasn't "opponents" that he objected to, but people who misunderstood his thesis from the git-go.

 

[indigofireflies]

Happens to me all the time. I've once had such great misinterpretations that it created a rift between my mother and I for weeks, when really, neither of us harbored any bad will towards each other right from the beginning.

I agree with most of the posts. Communication is golden. Even if sometimes you hate it.

 

[Andropov]

Stop being so pretentious.