Just passing time with SMALL TALK

[EditorOne]

For the benefit of those mostly younger folks who just don't feel comfortable generating small talk, here's some.

Notice that my avatar has changed. It's me again, not Robert Mitchum with the raised eyebrow that got him into fights. That's because my knee finally stopped hurting enough that I don't need lessons in stoicism from his image any more.

So far as I can tell, my knee stopped hurting because I stopped shaving on Saturday. I had a beard until October 30, 2009, when I shaved it for the sake of a Halloween costume. That immediately marked, also, the onslaught of a bout of bad luck, bad decisions, and blah blah blah. Job went away, unemployment ran out two months before retirement money kicked in instead of two months after like I'd planned, getting qualified as a public insurance adjuster revealed to me people I thought were friends were not any such thing. (Bet that sounds familiar.)

In any event, the price of razor blades is so high, and I am so utterly, totally tired of scraping my face off each morning, that on Saturday I announced to my wife "I quit shaving." Within 24 hours the Philadelphia Eagles won a game in a way that makes them seem like they're just there to give lessons to the other teams on how the game is played, I got a pretty big insurance claim come knocking on my door instead of me fruitlessly looking for it, and, most significantly, the dog stopped biting me. (Long story, but if you think I don't have patience, meet my dog and count my scars.)

I'm not going to ignore the obvious any more. Obviously, for whatever reason, my beard has a lot in common with Sampson's hair. It is the fount of luck, the source of power, etc. I'm not ignoring it any more. The beard is back.

So that's small talk, the kind that turns sillliness into a virtue and gives even INTPs a tiny reason to crack a smile. Talk about yourself, make it a kind of joke (anyone who knows me at all knows that me believing in a lucky charm is inconsistent, incongruous and therefore mildly funny) and then you can avoid social remorse, emotional hangovers and self-ostracization (a word?) no matter how many cocktail parties you have to attend....


Footnote: I just made homemade fruit bars for the first time because I was tired of the crap in the stores, and they turned out perfectly. Chalk another one up for the beard....

 

[Deleted member 1424]

The thought of you not having a beard, Editor, is actually somewhat frightening.

The next time you shave is certain to bring about the end of the world.

 

[lucky12]

Ill miss Mitchum. I never even knew the fella but the picture was iconic.

 

[downsowf]

I'm growing a beard in solidarity. Actually, like you, I have been too lazy to shave, and I ran out of my mach3 razors. You're as equally as distinguished looking as Mitchum. Though I did check out the Dick Cavett interview with Mitchum and he was a bad ass.

Also, I cannot cheer for the Eagles because I'm still mad at what Vick did to my Falcons but it was nice seeing ya'll beat up on the Cowboys.

 

[Minuend]

I know exactly what you're talking about! Out of laziness, I have only shaved one of my legs, the other one looks like the grandchild of King Kong.

 

[Dapper Dan]

Aw, I liked your avatar. It was the perfect INTP face.

 

[Jah]

You look good.


Wasn't there a post-apocalyptic setting where razorblades was the new currency (maybe it was proposed in a movie of some kind... Can't readily remember. )


I never shave my legs.



Homemade fruit bars ?
What are those ?

 

[Meer]

Just in time for movember?

 

[Cavallier]

Along a similar line: I have decided to no longer wear glasses or contacts. I usually wear them all the time because it means I can see. Duh. Anyway, when I wear them I generally feel rotten about the world in it's entirety by the end of each and every day. However, when I broke my glasses a week ago I had to go without them for a few days. My outlook on the world became massively more cheery and my general demeanor much less disgruntled.

I can see things up close without any problem at all. I just can't see things far away like people's expressions. Now that my glasses are fixed I have decided to not wear them. A world a bit more blurry is also a world a bit less blessedly irritating. This new lack of eyesight allows me to ignore the world around me in new and wonderful ways.

 

[downsowf]

I know exactly what you're talking about! Out of laziness, I have only shaved one of my legs, the other one looks like the grandchild of King Kong.

Wow. The imagery. I think I just threw up in my mouth.

 

[Plain Jane]

Along a similar line: I have decided to no longer wear glasses or contacts. I usually wear them all the time because it means I can see. Duh. Anyway, when I wear them I generally feel rotten about the world in it's entirety by the end of each and every day. However, when I broke my glasses a week ago I had to go without them for a few days. My outlook on the world became massively more cheery and my general demeanor much less disgruntled.

I can see things up close without any problem at all. I just can't see things far away like people's expressions. Now that my glasses are fixed I have decided to not wear them. A world a bit more blurry is also a world a bit less blessedly irritating. This new lack of eyesight allows me to ignore the world around me in new and wonderful ways.

You had me laughing to tears on this one! I share your feelings.

 

[Plain Jane]

I know exactly what you're talking about! Out of laziness, I have only shaved one of my legs, the other one looks like the grandchild of King Kong.

Why shave even one?

 

[Deleted member 1424]

We would appear to have similar vision problems, Cavallier. (I'm -2.25)
How do you drive?

 

[Jah]

Why shave even one?

Are you suggesting shaving just a half leg ?

 

[Cavallier]

We would appear to have similar vision problems, Cavallier. (I'm -2.25)
How do you drive?

Pish Posh. I know the route home easily enough. Besides, who cares about small children and the elderly? The rest can hightail it out of my way.

 

[lucky12]

Cav, for 7 years I did not wear my glasses, unless sitting at the back of class (-2.75). It's awesome, isn't it?

I caved into wearing them because driving is a passion of mine.

In a high school of 2000 bodies, down the long hall ways I could distinguish my friends by movement patterns(how they walk, where they are generally situated at certain times), shapes and colours. Sounds far fetched doesn't it? Ha I bet no one will ever believe me

I didn't realize how bad my vision was until I saw a tree in full foliage with correction, happened in grade 7.

 

[Plain Jane]

Are you suggesting shaving just a half leg ?

No maybe just the ankles.

 

[Minuend]

Well, I kinda think I've done a job well done when finishing shaving my beard

 

[Dr. Freeman]

 

[Dimensional Transition]

I like this thread.

INTP small talk isn't that bad.

 

[Moocow]

I don't really know much about Robert Mitchum but having his face next to all of your posts increased my presupposition of wisdom therein. But as mentioned, your bearded face is an equally positive supplement.

I wish I could come up with fun anecdotes on the fly, but I have a habit of tending towards humor that in most cases is either too bizarre or dark for chatting with random folks, so there's a lot of self monitoring going on more than anything.

 

[Nattall There]

I believe small talk of the mind purging sort is highly necessary for the INTP's of this world. Not to mention we are the pattern percievers. Thus, it makes sence that you would note the bad luck your beard shaving ritual has brought about. I feel my pattern would flip on axis of yours though if I stop shaving. Im sure pandamonium would ensue or random callings of sasquatch would be reported if I stopped shaving.... My legs.

 

[The Gopher]

Small talk great! I find it Ironic that you capitalied small talk in the title, was that for show or just to actually make it stand out either way Still funny. Hmm what should I talk about? Well most people my age talk about music and girls and alcohol and the weather etc... So let's start with music, I listen to music constantly I use free internet radio (shoutcast) I can't work without music. music is always playing on my computer.

Now about girls :/ I don't really no what to say because I don't really like girls. (This is just here to let you know that I know what you're thinking) Most girls like me some love me but that's just creepy so I try to avoid them.

ALCOHOL! well... Wine is kinda ok I prefer any drink cold though... Not really sure what to say here I'm jsut typing because I have nothing to do until lunch. The weather is really hot... well not really just my room adds 5c to the temperature ( no kidding I have checked) hottest room in summer coldest in winter.

I will continue to ramble because that's my job and I need practice being interesting, so all this is being typed at the speed that I type without thought. However I haven't attempted to be interesting yet, so should I start? Naa it's to boring being interesting all the time trust me. However i suddenly realised that I say however a lot.

This started like a parody and I only needed text of any sort to fill the small text thing but now I don't know what to say I am not stopping even when I have plenty so the question arises when am I going to use a full stop. Don't worry if you read out loud you can take a breath now.

Talk laterzzz BYE!

 

[Irishpenguin]

Lol I always imagined that old avatar guy as an actual paper or book editor...or like that guy off of spiderman that's always a total douche to Peter Parker...except this guy was kinda nice...hehe, I had no idea who he actually was ^^;

 

[Cogwulf]

I have a small goatee type thing which I intend to grow long enough to braid one day. If I ever shaved it off I would go insane due to having nothing to stroke.
Whenever I've tried growing a full beard I have to stop after about a week or two because I just can't stand the itchiness.
Though regarding shaving, I recently switched to an old fashioned double edge razor. Since I started using it I've completely stopped having problems with rashes or ingrown hairs. I would recommend trying it to anyone who ever has problems with shaving.

Cav, for 7 years I did not wear my glasses, unless sitting at the back of class (-2.75). It's awesome, isn't it?

I caved into wearing them because driving is a passion of mine.

In a high school of 2000 bodies, down the long hall ways I could distinguish my friends by movement patterns(how they walk, where they are generally situated at certain times), shapes and colours. Sounds far fetched doesn't it? Ha I bet no one will ever believe me

I didn't realize how bad my vision was until I saw a tree in full foliage with correction, happened in grade 7.

I used to be the same, whenever I actually looked up from the ground which was quite rare I could usually spot people in a busy playground before any of my friends who had perfect vision.
I finally caved in and started wearing glasses full time at around the age of 15 or 16 because I like being able to see things.
Then at 18 I started wearing contacts because I like having peripheral vision and not getting eye-strain.