INTP's and sensitivity?

[Taniwha]

How sensitive would say to anything such as criticism?

*skip the next part if you want to answer the question above*

I don't handle insults or criticism very well because I hate being wrong and wasting peoples time, I guess I'm just feeling a little bit raw after a nurse from the local medical practitioner I go to had a go at me for taking more medication than I should of, what was I supposed to do? go with out sleep? I apologized over and over again but It didn't seem to compute, so naturally I took it out on myself. I have a huge dislike towards myself because I seem to make others upset or frustrated, and that's wrong (I'm not entirely sure why, but it is).

I have no idea if that's a feeling thing (F) or a mentally ill thing (well I know I have Aspergers, empathy and a general lack of understanding is major dysfunctional part of me).
I have been stressed out recently with school (university) and upcoming tests as well as the training (intense fight training) I undergo, so I haven't been sleeping well either.

Can someone please confirm whether this is a normal reaction for an INTP, because I honestly don't have a clue. I need someone that can relate with this just to confirm that I have some form of sanity left.

 

[childish_intellect]

It would depend on what I was being judged upon. I always return the favor anyhow.

 

[Taniwha]

It would depend on what I was being judged upon. I always return the favor anyhow.

Yeah, its always good to return the favor, give one and get one in return.
Its only logical.

 

[Fukyo]

Can someone please confirm whether this is a normal reaction for an INTP, because I honestly don't have a clue. I need someone that can relate with this just to confirm that I have some form of sanity left.

1) I don't think you are an INTP.
2) Stress contributes to sensitivity, so expect to be very easily rattled and overwhelmed if you are stressed out, which you seem to be. This is unrelated to type.
3) I did find your reaction to be exaggerated in this situation because I believe you have misinterpreted it and your reaction was heavily influenced by some existing issues. I also don't think this is abnormal, it's going to persist for as long as you carry this assurance that you make people upset, it's kind of a self-perpetuating cycle that only makes you feel worse about yourself. Realistically, I don't think there's something so horrible about you that people can't stand you.

 

[Dimensional Transition]

This reminds me of a thread I made a while ago. I had(have) somewhat the same problem.
http://www.intpforum.com/showthread.php?t=9210

You're still an INTP probably, INTPs have feeling too, it's not their main function, but F is certainly there.

 

[Deridaburi]

That of course depends on the idea or action which is being criticized. I think my difference in sensitivity compared to other people is that it does not matter how much I am criticized about something trivial, I will most likely thank the person. However if something that I am invested in is criticized honestly there is a high probability that I will not be happy. For example if I tell someone my "amazing" new theory and they blow it off as retarded before hearing me out, I'll most likely stop talking to the person.

y = LI(x^3)

y = How pissed I will get
x = How much I care about the subject of criticism
I = How intensely I am criticized
L = How long I am criticized for

 

[Trebuchet]

I don't handle insults or criticism very well because I hate being wrong...

Can someone please confirm whether this is a normal reaction for an INTP, because I honestly don't have a clue. I need someone that can relate with this just to confirm that I have some form of sanity left.

Sounds normal to me. Stress definitely brings out my oversensitivity. When I have had enough sleep, and I don't have a cold or big worries or anything, then I shrug of criticism pretty easily. But how often does that happen? Anyway, yes, criticism on anything where I invested a lot of myself can upset me to the point of paralysis for a while. I don't know that it is an INTP thing. I think that can happen to anyone who is stressed. Taking things out on yourself is pretty consistent with being INTP, though.

For me, a lot of it depends on whether I think the other person is worthy to criticize me, and whether I consider myself good at whatever it is. A medical practitioner criticizing my health practices would certainly upset me, as would a professor criticizing my understanding of his class material. But a random guy in a hardware store telling me I picked the wrong kind of paint wouldn't affect me at all. If I thought he was right, I'd listen, but there isn't any of my self-image invested in knowledge of paint, and I don't really care when someone is being a know-it-all.

It sounds to me like someone hit a nerve. You might be sensitive about criticism on certain topics, or just stressed out and taking everything badly. You don't sound nuts, just in desperate need of sleep and some downtime.

 

[Lobstrich]

I'm VERY open-minded towards criticism. I love when people have something they can tell me, as long as they bring arguements to back it up of course.

 

[Trebuchet]

y = LI(x^3)

y = How pissed I will get
x = How much I care about the subject of criticism
I = How intensely I am criticized
L = How long I am criticized for

This is where art meets science.

 

[Taniwha]

Sounds normal to me. Stress definitely brings out my oversensitivity. When I have had enough sleep, and I don't have a cold or big worries or anything, then I shrug of criticism pretty easily. But how often does that happen? Anyway, yes, criticism on anything where I invested a lot of myself can upset me to the point of paralysis for a while. I don't know that it is an INTP thing. I think that can happen to anyone who is stressed. Taking things out on yourself is pretty consistent with being INTP, though.

For me, a lot of it depends on whether I think the other person is worthy to criticize me, and whether I consider myself good at whatever it is. A medical practitioner criticizing my health practices would certainly upset me, as would a professor criticizing my understanding of his class material. But a random guy in a hardware store telling me I picked the wrong kind of paint wouldn't affect me at all. If I thought he was right, I'd listen, but there isn't any of my self-image invested in knowledge of paint, and I don't really care when someone is being a know-it-all.

It sounds to me like someone hit a nerve. You might be sensitive about criticism on certain topics, or just stressed out and taking everything badly. You don't sound nuts, just in desperate need of sleep and some downtime.

Good points, I can usually shrug off negative criticism, especially if it comes from someone who doesn't have a clue what they are talking about. Still I still can't feel but slightly hurt that they would have to be angry at me, I'm a solutions person and prefer to be negotiating. What makes me upset is when people who take a shot at me without being face to face with me, like over the phone. Partly because I have trouble explaining things over the phone without face to face contact, I felt embarrassed because it was regarding my own health. I'm ashamed to tell people about what medication I'm on, and even more so for what its for.

Concerning stress, at the moment I'm undergoing hours (13.5 a week) of fight training for upcoming fights next year which I'm doing with my trainers in both Boxing and Muay Thai (Thai kick boxing) five nights a week, on top of that I'm also training at the gym. So psychically I'm exhausted. I don't sleep very well as I tend have explicate nightmares so I'm on my medication for that. On top of that I'm studying Human Biology and Maths year 13 (I never went to school during my teens so its all new to me). I'm enjoying it but I'm finding it hard to focus in class (sensory overload - its an aspect of Aspergers), I also have a exam tomorrow for science and I'm worried that I will forget everything. I'm also worried about my dyslexia affecting my results.

 

[Words]

Baseless accusations stir me quite easily. Why is this? Is it because its a proclamation of falsehood? Could be partly. Is it because its a proclamation of falsehood that invades my being? maybe. I advise anyone else sharing the same situation to "not argue" anymore. Its hard to resist but know that good argument =/= persuaded person. Furthermore, initial assumption of person hints further to unreasonable person.

Also, there are no such thing as "personal attacks", there are only "behavior attacks".

In addition, if you guys want desensitization, just "jump on the cold water". Experience all forms of "criticism" and develop your value system as oppose to your logical system.

 

[snafupants]

Eh, people get upset and frustrated when you even tactfully unveil their faults. As an aside, what happened was no big deal, the nurse could have been having a rough day and that put her over the edge. Who knows?

 

[Philosophyking87]

Criticism annoys me when it's done it a blunt, offensive manner.
If, on the other hand, someone is dispassionately merely stating problems they find with something in a very calm, reasonable, and objective manner, I usually give my own input or agree with them. Thus, it all comes down to how someone goes about criticizing me.
I'm like an animal that becomes aggravated when you stare at it offensively, with a threatening hint. So I'm a bit territorial, so to speak, about my ideas, thoughts, and actions and I do not take kindly to those who would attempt to insult by means of criticism.

It's one thing to honestly criticize; but it's another to completely bash, insult, and degrade. I find that most people can't tell the difference and usually criticize while also personally attacking someone in some fashion. Thus, instead of saying, "I think you may have gone about this incorrectly," they'll say, "You were completely reckless and out of line this time. What were you thinking? You could have done x, y, z. You could have killed yourself! What kind of person would do such a thing? I expected more of you." Criticism should be objective and reasonable, rather than harsh and personal.

This sensitivity to what I perceive to be overly offensive, rude, inappropriate, and personal criticism often leads to my becoming extremely angry and upset, incapable of really showing a hint of reason, and this is because I do have anger issues.

So it's not really an INTP thing, I think. I think it's merely a personal flaw somewhere. I'm relatively reasonable and objective in other aspects of my life. Offensive criticism just sets me off and makes me completely insane, like a ticking time bomb. So perhaps you are merely an INTP with certain emotional issues, as I have with anger.

 

[Philosophyking87]

Eh, people get upset and frustrated when you even tactfully unveil their faults. As an aside, what happened was no big deal, the nurse could have been having a rough day and that put her over the edge. Who knows?

Even if the nurse was having a rough day, the OP would still have had reason to become upset by the seemingly overly offensive criticism. Again, it's one thing to criticize in a reasonable manner; it's another entirely to push the point far beyond acceptance. If you have reason to criticize someone and they say, "Yes, that was foolish and incorrect," there is then no more reason to push it. Judging from the OP, this nurse was relentless and couldn't tolerate a simple mistake.

If the nurse had merely pointed out the OP's faults in a very reasonable manner, which would have made the OP say, "You're right, it was stupid," and the OP still felt that her criticism was offensive, then clearly he would be super sensitive. But not taking some nagging nurse's bullshit when she's going overboard with the criticism doesn't seem at all unreasonable to me.

 

[Deridaburi]

This is where art meets science.

Thank you

 

[Razare]

Sounds like an Fe problem. Asperger's can skew your MBTI tests results from what I understand. It's likely you have Fe in your top two functions or it is a well-developed tertiary.

So I don't think you're an INTP, either. Figuring out what exactly you are; however, may be difficult. Even if you're not an INTP, testing as one likely means you probably share common qualities with other INTP's on this forum. Even upon discovering your actual personality, you may still identify more with the INTP personality.

As for the criticism eating you apart, focus on positive aspects of yourself that at least you can be proud of. At the very least, avoid repeatedly bashing yourself over the issues which bother you.

 

[Taniwha]

Well, today I saw a psychologist (the third one in a row), she suspects that I have BPD (borderline personality disorder) which is linked with my C-PTSD (complex post traumatic stress disorder) as well as Aspergers.
Interesting mix, but there you go.

I am confident that I am a INTP, just a broken one.
I am definitely a thinker, maybe not your stereotypical one, by hey, no one thinker is alike.

 

[Philosophyking87]

Well, today I saw a psychologist (the third one in a row), she suspects that I have BPD (borderline personality disorder) which is linked with my C-PTSD (complex post traumatic stress disorder) as well as Aspergers.
Interesting mix, but there you go.

I am confident that I am a INTP, just a broken one.
I am definitely a thinker, maybe not your stereotypical one, by hey, no one thinker is alike.

Yeah. I'm INTP without question, as well.
Yet, I have anger problems, psychological issues, and seem generally emotionally unstable.
I'm hyper-sensitive and take things way too personally.
I'm very easy to upset and send off into rage.
So perhaps "broken INTP" explains things. I'm clearly broken as well.
Yet, I'm not sure what disorders I may have, specifically.

I'm thinking I might have social anxiety and inattention deficit ("predominantly inattentive" ADHD). But I'm not sure what else. There may be more.
I should go see a psychologist soon as well.

 

[Nibbler]

Criticism bothers me most when my intelligence, wasted promise, or dazzling abilities are called into insulting question by people I know.

I'm not insulted by random people or medical people tasked with my care. I wouldn't have "given it back" as some indicated they would. I would simply explain the situation and pretty much be like,"Let's move on."

Therefore, I'm not so sure your reason for taking excess medication was an INTP reason. "What was I supposed to do?" is an F response. A T response would be more, "For these reasons, XYZ, I made the decision. Let's move on."

But what's my categorization matter? We're all human beings and can buckle under certain stresses unique to each of us. I certainly have. I was masking as an INFP for a long time before I was able to deal with a lot of deeply ingrained external hang-ups.

So hang in there. If you truly are an INTP (I have no reason to doubt that so far) you're simply on your way to reclaiming your unaffected "Let's move on..." stance that so many of us have also had to grow into and perfect.

 

[Nibbler]

Yeah. I'm INTP without question, as well.
Yet, I have anger problems, psychological issues, and seem generally emotionally unstable.
I'm hyper-sensitive and take things way too personally.
I'm very easy to upset and send off into rage.
So perhaps "broken INTP" explains things. I'm clearly broken as well.
Yet, I'm not sure what disorders I may have, specifically.

I'm thinking I might have social anxiety and inattention deficit ("predominantly inattentive" ADHD). But I'm not sure what else. There may be more.
I should go see a psychologist soon as well.

Your age and upbringing also matters. When I was your age (I'm 39), I often interpreted criticism as largely unwarranted, purposefully hurtful and careless. If frustrated by irrational situations that would never seem to change, no one was cooperating, and I had no control, I would erupt in anger.

CHILDHOOD:
I was raised with arbitrary rules by a hyper-critical controlling nag of a father who acted like a nice guy to the world; and a critical, martyr mother who raged a lot. And they were polar opposites in that my dad expected perfection without room for error, and my mother expected failure "so don't bother trying." It was emotionally chaotic, but people thought we were such a lovely family on the outside. So I guess I was broken for many years, too. How could you not be after that?

ADD:
12 years ago, a psychoanalyst insisted I was depressed my whole childhood, and that precipitated my concentration problem and not the other way around (that's a false dichotomy). But she was wrong because I still have focus issues, and a huge part of my torture as a kid was being mocked for forgetting and overlooking details. Even then I logically knew you can grow up depressed in a chaotic family and be ADD and introverted.

ANXIETY:
I had so much anxiety, it gave me cancer. (I'm ok now).

SOCIAL ANXIETY:
Yes, this too, but I'm largely grown out of it for not giving a shit anymore, though I'm still highly introverted.

So I had to find a lot of refuge in being an INFP--which was a drain on my psyche (the anxiety, since my endeavors as an F never seemed to work out because of my subconscious inability to commit to fraud). It took me

time,
positive self-introspection,
demonstrated success,
and perseverance

to come into myself as the overly logical happy asshole that so many strangers on the internet think of me as today.

And I'm actually considering medical school, something I would have thought outrageously impossible in my 20s.

 

[Philosophyking87]

I also know that I have more Fi than INTP's probably tend to have.
Ti > Ne > Ni/Fi (something to that effect).
Perhaps a larger Fi will lead to an increased sensitivity in INTPs.

 

[Taniwha]

Working with my counselor (INFJ) who was the one to introduce me to the MBTI system agreed with me on the fact that I am a broken thinker, she is certain that I am INTP. I've known her for years. I often refer to thinking allot in our sessions and sit in the thinkers position. I don't know how much more INTP you can get than that.

 

[SpaceYeti]

I don't think I'm sensitive, but I could simply be unaware of it.

 

[HDINTP]

There is no sensitivity in my case. I think about all the things i am told but with 0 sensitivity. No problem when i am judged i am usually able to prove to that person it is wrong.

 

[Nocturne]

That of course depends on the idea or action which is being criticized. I think my difference in sensitivity compared to other people is that it does not matter how much I am criticized about something trivial, I will most likely thank the person. However if something that I am invested in is criticized honestly there is a high probability that I will not be happy. For example if I tell someone my "amazing" new theory and they blow it off as retarded before hearing me out, I'll most likely stop talking to the person.

y = LI(x^3)

y = How pissed I will get
x = How much I care about the subject of criticism
I = How intensely I am criticized
L = How long I am criticized for

>.< How relative.

 

[Jennywocky]

...I often refer to thinking allot in our sessions and sit in the thinkers position. I don't know how much more INTP you can get than that.

Well, you've convinced me!

 

[Enne]

INFP, 4w5.

 

[Particle]

The OP sounds a lot like me, actually. I'm INTP with a somewhat retarded feeler. Consequently, I have an extremely hard time dealing with what others perceive about me because I'm simultaneously sensitive to it and wholly incapable of deciphering social cues. Hello there, recipe for social unhappiness.

I also have a hard time and tend to beat myself up when I think one of the following two are true:
1) Someone believes I believe something I don't (worse if they've judged me for it)
2) Someone believes I am wrong about something when I'm not

By all means, I should be the one moving on and ignoring them, but instead I tend to find me judging myself by what these other people think even in such circumstances. It sounds as if you're largely the same.

 

[Grove]

Like others have mentioned, I can be overly sensitive if the criticism is of something important to me, if i think the judgments being made were done so hastily or without all of the information, and if I'm otherwise stressed out.

What gets me though is that good friend of mine always thinks I'm overly sensitive. He will make a blanket statement about his observations of my behavior. If I attempt to deconstruct my rational for that behavior, or even point out any inconsistency in his logic, I'm called overly sensitive. "Don't get mad, it is just an observation." I'm not mad, I'm just trying to understand where you are coming from and define. This drives me nuts. Does anyone else experience this?

 

[Zionoxis]

Usually when I am in a serious debate and one of my points gets completely ruined and disproved, I am sort of dazed. I just sort of stare and try to process if there is anyway what they say could be wrong. If I cannot, I get a bit irritated and will either swallow my pride and succumb to that argument or try to BS around it.