Sometimes I suspect it comes from past experience. I'm 32, I've been an atheist for about 5 years, and was raised as a Southern Baptist before that. There was plenty of overlapping in there - I was probably always a truth-seeker, but college and the internet really sparked the "why am I just believing everything anyone tells me" stage from like, ages 19-27.
I think having grown up as a believer gives me certain insight nowadays. When another atheist says "how can someone actually BELIEVE in something like that" I have the ability to say "I know EXACTLY how they can think that way, because I used to be there."
I think it's very useful for people to put themselves in another person's position to look at things from their POV. If you don't understand what someone thinks, then how can you expect your own views to address them in the right way? If someone is against an issue because of family or financial problems, and you try to address them with scientific or ecological benefits, then the discussion will fail to go anywhere. We have to address the right "nodes" in the other person, and unless we have a small idea what it is they are ACTUALLY thinking (and not just our media-induced stereotype of what we're told they are thinking) then communication breaks down.
A fellow ex-Southern Baptist! Welcome to the club. Actually,
you should probably welcome
me to the club because you've been an atheist longer than I. I know exactly what you are saying here. I was a devoted Christian for almost 20 years and so I do understand a little about spirituality and why people believe in god. To call them stupid or ignorant is to call myself stupid and ignorant.
The problem that I find is that it isn't always a two way street. My experience of faith and the loss thereof, tends to be written off as inauthentic. The reason for this is that they assume that if I saw things from
their perspective, if I understood
their experience, I never would have walked away in the first place. But if I should consider their experience with an open mind, should they not extend me the same courtesy?
I've been called closed minded before, even here, but why should I water down what I really think in order to make it palatable for others? Just so I can be perceived as well rounded and open to new ideas? Should I sacrifice my true thoughts and feelings on the altar of political correctness? Sometimes the source of our frustrations could be from the frailty of our own arguments and not always the closed minded ignorance of those who disagree with us.
But that being said, there are a lot people who just can't see the big picture and are immersed in ignorance. It is frustrating and I get tired of smiling and nodding while screaming in my mind "Do you have any fucking idea what you're talking about?"
But in the cold, dark recesses of the night, I never forget that it could be I who is immersed in ignorance.