How to be an Happy INTP

[Cegorach]

I hate all of you...

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

Ahhh what you're saying sounds logical but I don't like it because I'm only about making other people happy.... I don't know what to think

well, I am happy- if you are forcing me to call it that. Just not HAPPY!!!

Oh, and do you consider this your calling, XIII? Descend upon the sorrowful INTPs and transform their lives with your divine powers of happiness? I'm not saying this in a mean way, I'm just wondering.

Still, I am having a hard time believing that you are not one big joke. I don't mean to sound harsh, I just feel like you and all of the senior members of intp forum are giggling behind some virtual bushes or something while I sort of take you seriously.

Cause that has to be it, right?

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

NOTE: I finally read the mystically transformed XIII thread. I didn't want to for so long because it just sounded profoundly disinteresting. Now I get it!

(Remember- my first thread was about having zero interest in fantasy or sci-fi.)

 

[Kuu]

But I think they call that mania, not happiness. It's possible we don't know how to delineate between the two.

Perhaps we are the only sane ones! Who's to say that there IS a distinction between the two?

 

[John]

Thirteen, you are my hero, I've been looking for a clear cut description on something like this for a long long time now (possibly two or maybe three years). I am one of 'those' people who simply forgets to relax and thusly my sleep has suffered, so from the bottom of my heart to the soles of my feet

Thank you again.

 

[XIII]

Yeowzaspazow! My day is perect now. And now I will give a *bow*.


If anybody thinks I'm joking or not being serious please just try what I talked about... it works! Trust me, yogi people are very clever about emotions and they've been perfecting these techniques for hundreds of years

I just want to say agian that everything I say is honest no matter what any thread anywhere says... and please just ask if anything I say is confusing or doesn't make sense. The technique is kind of hard to describe in words.

 

[snowqueen]

The thing with allowing yourself to be happy is, you have to expose yourself to your emotions. You have to have to leave your shelter to feel the sun's warmth, and, in exchange, you put yourself at risk for numerous things.

I want to be happy, but I don't want to experience the inevitable crash.

When I stay within the logical shelter of my mind, I don't really get depressed, but I don't really feel very "happy" either.

Also, emotion makes me less rational, and therefore more likely to screw things up and make my life more miserable than it already is.

The close friends I have are few and precious. I can't afford to risk losing them after some uncontrolled emotional outburst. I care for them more than anything in the world; they are the ones who keep me sane(if you can call it that), and it's only with these people that I can even come close to being truly happy. The most severe depressions I've ever experienced were during times in which I felt I had no real close friends. I don't want to go back to that.

Ok, I'm going on and on.. blah blah..
Just my view, my rationalization of my behavior.
I just came up with all that in the last 5 minutes, totally improv. The scary thing is, it makes a lot of sense.

It makes sense to me. I have lost friends and lovers in the past by coming out of my 'logical shelter' - in fact I completely forgot I had one till recently. I am trying a different approach to emotions nowadays - partly because my repetoire is so limited and partly because I need some way to connect to them when they arise so they don't overwhelm me.

Ahhh what you're saying sounds logical but I don't like it because I'm only about making other people happy.... I don't know what to think

Clearly you don't know how to think either. God I hope you change personalities soon, this one is making me sick

 

[XIII]

That really upset me... in lots of ways. I'll try my best not to be angry at you about it.

 

[thebarran]

@snowqueen ooh your as cold as ice, if you bear any semblence to nigella lawson domestically and physically if coming after you...

 

[Fluffdaddy]

Happyness is temperary, but contentness doesn't have to be, thats why i just try to stay content, although i find that can even be hard at times.

 

[snowqueen]

@snowqueen ooh your as cold as ice, if you bear any semblence to nigella lawson domestically and physically if coming after you...

Do you know me?

[tightens her belt to show off her voluptuous hourglass figure and goes off home to eat up her leftover homemade curry from last night straight out of the fridge with her fingers]

 

[thebarran]

Do you know me?

[tightens her belt to show off her voluptuous hourglass figure and goes off home to eat up her leftover homemade curry from last night straight out of the fridge with her fingers]

hmm you've got an admirer now. You'll have to describe in detail how you cook a nice cottage pie one day. Give me some alone time material

 

[XIII]

Snowqueen I've been worrying about what you said earlier... I think maybe I've been saying things in the wrong way. The yoga and ways of being happier I talked about really work so I think I must have said them stupidly if people didnt think they were good...

Please tell me how I could do it better? I feel like I'm just being annoying even though I'm trying my best to help.

p.s. I saw your emotion thread and it reminded me of a really good book that I'd think you'd like because it lets you work out emotions with your mind ... like teaches you how to change them and make them stronger or weaker and also how to change how you express them if their causing your problems. Its ''The Emotional Hostage'' (I don't think you're a ''hostage'', I think that name isn't very good for the book) by Leslie Cameron-Bandler and somebody Lebeau. Here, I found you a link:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Emotional-Hostage-Rescuing-Your-Life/dp/0932573037

I know it may not seem like it but I think you would really like it . It's kind of like that graph you posted in your emotions thread, but I think it actually would work way better, and maybe you could even use them together if you want.

EDITEDIT: I also read that you did yoga in you're 20s? I think if you tried the thing I described in the first post you'd really like, especially because you've done some yoga before. It really does work!

 

[thebarran]

wow xiii you are overly sensitive arent you.

not the least bit patronizing now but i wanna slightly pinch one of your cheeks and gently wiggle it saying 'whos a little cutey eh?'

i think between the pair of you, you could completely split my personality and change me from bipolar to schizophrenic.

(@ xiii: just a bit of humour to lighten things up for you).

 

[XIII]

wow xiii you are overly sensitive arent you.

not the least bit patronizing now but i wanna slightly pinch one of your cheeks and gently wiggle it saying 'whos a little cutey eh?'

i think between the pair of you, you could completely split my personality and change me from bipolar to schizophrenic.

(@ xiii: just a bit of humour to lighten things up for you).

Can you adopt me? Also I had a granny who was bipolar and she was a really awesome person... she was a scientist in Scotland I think. Also I really think you should avoid splititng your personality... it doesn' tsound like a good idea at all.

 

[ChristopherL]

Ok, so I've been doing some research and talking with the 2 INTPs I know to work out how to make INTPs happier. I know some of you don't think that you want to be happy, that's ok, but really now ! So

The first way to make INTPs happier is siliness. INTPs always seem to get caught up in these huge mazes in their minds, and sometimes they hit a rough spot and think that the entire everything results upon them solving the problemm in their mind. Well I've had that a few times in my life as well (but probably not as much as most of you) and the best way to solve it is to not take it so seriously! I know there are loads of books around implying that hapiness is impossible, btu that's because happy people don't write the kind of books that unhappy ones read! They all take it so seriously! Look, we're all just floating around in the sky without much idea of what's going on with anything, so we migth as well ligthen up and realise that we can have fun while we do it! I think that most wars and things depend from people taking everything too seriously and not having had enough fun and kindness and play. So whenever you get caught up in a maze or big problem in your mind, just let your attention drift off into play or fun. Use your beatiful Ne (I use mine all the time and I'm usually happy... it works ).

OK the second way which is kind of the same is to work on being friendly and knowing about small talk and social nicities. It's like a dance, see. Most INTPs want to skip all the middle steps and just dance the last move. That's kind of silly for people who are so good at logic . You need to do the little steps and be friendly and put on a face first before you get to the big ones and have really good and understanding friends to support you! I know loads of INTPs have hardened themselves against this... and I understand why.... but any of you can really have a lot more fun if you just learn to dance the first steps before the last ones .

Ok the third way is a kind of yoga I learned about when I was in China. I got to know this girl whose father was a martial artist, and she taught me how to do it. It can take a lot of effort, but it actually instantly makes you feel good. I know you migth think that you would know about it already if it worked but it actually does work... of course it won't keep you happy the whole day all the time... but it makesyou more happy most of the time and always loving and happy and sexy while you're doing it. Ok I'll try and describe it the best I can:

Her'e some general info...
It's about remembring intense moments of emotion, than feelign what the physical feeling is of those emotions, then moving that feeling all around your body. She said it was tantra but there's no sex... although if you and somebody of the other sex or the sex you're attracted to do it at the same time things will probably happen . You remember the intense emotion and then let go of the memory but keep the emotion and then move the feeling aroudn your whole body as you breathe. Once you've been doing it for a week or so it feels so blissful ritght from the beginning to the end .

Here's detailed info...
There are 7 emotions. Do 3 or more breaths in and out for each emotion. It's best to do it while sitting in half-lotus or whatever sitting position is comfortable for you. The emotions (some of them aren't really emotions, they're a little different) are:
1. Relaxation
2. Pride in an achievment
3. Side-splitting laughter
4. Love
5. Deep gratitude
6. ''sexual ecstasy''... like the most amazing sexual experience you've had. It doesn't have to be sex... it can be a beatiful kiss or orgasm or any memory that brings up the good feeling.
7. Complete awe at the universe.

For the first one... Clench your toes really really tight. Then relax. Then clench them really really tight. Then relax. Finally clench them so tight they hurt. Then relax. Now you feel that feeling of relaxation and freedom from tension in your toes? Good. Take a deep breath and move that feeling up through your leg (I know this might sound funny, but it really works). Feel it relax every muscle as it moves up through your calvs and thighs and then waist and then stomach and then chest and then shoulders... and then let it flow down into your arms and then back up into your head. As it goes up to your head, feel it flow over the back of your head and then over the top to your face. And then feel it relaxing the muscles of your forehead deeply and then your cheeks and chin. Then mix the feeling with your saliva (don't try to understand it, just do it ) and swallow it down into your stomach and move it around inside your body.

That's the breath in. I know it seems like a lot to do in one breath but you get used to doing it quickly with time.

Then you breath out and feel the feeling slowly moving back down to your feet. The top of your body will be more relaxed than it was before, but slightly less relaxed than the bits where you're moving the feeling to. The feeling can either be in only one bit of your body or in your whole body at once... don't think about it too much, just get used to it and play with it. The feeling will end up at the soles of your feet.

That's one breath. Do 3 for each of the 7 emotions.


Relaxation is a bit different than the others. With the others you do this:

Vividly remember some time you felt that emotion (or the closest thing you've had to it) really strongly. Make the pictures and sounds big and bright, and feel where the emotion is physically in your body. This may seem a little hard at first, but you'll get sensitive to it if you practice. Ok, now make it as big and bright and strong as you possibly can. Fill your body and mind wiht it.... when I do this I sometimes cry from the overwhelming joy of it.... then let go of the memory and just keep the feeling. Keep the feeling without the memory....

then move the feeling down to your toes. Now take your first breath in and move it up and around your body like you did with relaxation... when it reaches your face, feel the smile on your face grow big and wide. Remember that you smile real smiles with the cheek muscles just below you eyes, not with your mouth and teeth. Smiling will actually make the feeling stronger. Once you've moved it all around and swallowed it down, breath out and let it go back down to your toes. Do this 3 times with all of the feelings.

A few more things... when you breath in, try to take as big a breath as possible and push your belly out. This helps the feeling to move according to my Chinese friend . When you breath out, let our stomach come really far in so it's like you're squeezing all the air out and squeezing the feeling down to your feet. It might not seem like you have enough breath to move the feeling around your whole body during one breath at first, but just do the best you can and it will come with time.


Now INTPs . If you learn how to do that, you can use it whenever you get serious and depressed. It won't make everything perfect, but it will stop you feeling bad and let you be a more happy and loving person. Don't try to argue with it because it just works and you'll see that if you try it for a while. The first two or three times are always the hardest, and it just gets better and better every time you do it after that.


Anyway no matter if you take my advice or not, you're all awesome people anwyay. I feel so priveliged to have a forum with so many geniuses just a click away . Please don't be too harsh with me if you disagree... I'm just trying to help and make people happy and I really can't argue as well as you.

All I can say is that I and some people who I know and wanted to help do this every day (I do it twice actually) and it makes us way more happier and friendly and loving. You just kind of glow when you're doing this all the time, and people just seem to like you way more! I have no idea how it works

That's way too long.
You're pretty.

 

[preilemus]

I'm tempted to break all these new users' hearts by telling them that XIII isnt actually a woman, but Ill hold it in.

oh wait, did I say too much?

 

[thebarran]

I'm tempted to break all these new users' hearts by telling them that XIII isnt actually a woman, but Ill hold it in.

oh wait, did I say too much?

I could still wiggle his cheek and say 'abudgey budgey budgey boo'

 

[preilemus]

go ahead, i'm not his bodyguard or anything

 

[XIII]

I could still wiggle his cheek and say 'abudgey budgey budgey boo'

Well it depends if you adopted me!

 

[thebarran]

I dont think i'd quailify to adopt anyone... although with an enf? partner i'd have the greatest kids ever

 

[XIII]

P!!! I'm not at all J...

 

[snowqueen]

hmm you've got an admirer now. You'll have to describe in detail how you cook a nice cottage pie one day. Give me some alone time material

I don't give away my secrets for free.

 

[XIII]

Ah but remember that Nietzshe who was an INTP said that he was so overflowing with understanding that couldn't hold any back

 

[thebarran]

I don't give away my secrets for free.

I never stated I wouldnt give anything in return, I can cook a lovely steak (although i refuse to cook it beyond medium rare).

(the trick also is using red wine and beef stock for any who get put off by the blood).

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

Ah but remember that Nietzshe who was an INTP said that he was so overflowing with understanding that couldn't hold any back

A true ENFP quoting Nietzsche? You just exposed yourself, XIII!

 

[thebarran]

Flesh please change your avatar again. It is quite an unpleasant sight.

 

[snowqueen]

I never stated I wouldnt give anything in return, I can cook a lovely steak (although i refuse to cook it beyond medium rare).

(the trick also is using red wine and beef stock for any who get put off by the blood).

medium rare is my favourite - a neck massage would be nicer though.

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

Flesh please change your avatar again. It is quite an unpleasant sight.

Better? So you're bipolar, too? High-five!

 

[XIII]

A true ENFP quoting Nietzsche? You just exposed yourself, XIII!

Hey I have memories!

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

Hey I have memories!

Touche. But still. I have plenty of memories of my Catholic catechism, but I'm not exactly quoting it to support my arguments.

 

[XIII]

Touche. But still. I have plenty of memories of my Catholic catechism, but I'm not exactly quoting it to support my arguments.

methinks brain's trying to outsmart me . *hugs brain*.

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

Ah, huggy wuggy booboo. I loves my hugsies!

 

[thebarran]

medium rare is my favourite - a neck massage would be nicer though.

That would require more than a forum unkess you believe in some sort of telepathy massage, or expect me to get off my bum and drive to you which would take a lot more than a recipe... (also something i wont do, who knows what freaks are out there. i should know im one of them), although in no way suggesting anything about you and maybe taken too literal and if so sorry begin flirting again. bloody hell between you and xiii i now dont know if im coming or going.

Better? So you're bipolar, too? High-five!

Hey brain, you too. although i think ive lost it and rediscovered sanity.

But maybe have a chat about some experiences sometime.

 

[snowqueen]

That would require more than a forum unkess you believe in some sort of telepathy massage, or expect me to get off my bum and drive to you which would take a lot more than a recipe... (also something i wont do, who knows what freaks are out there. i should know im one of them), although in no way suggesting anything about you and maybe taken too literal and if so sorry begin flirting again. bloody hell between you and xiii i now dont know if im coming or going.

lol you started it with the whole Nigella thing! 'tis but a bit of idle banter, don't fret. (But I am definitely more Nigella than Paltrow).

 

[thebarran]

lol you started it with the whole Nigella thing! 'tis but a bit of idle banter, don't fret. (But I am definitely more Nigella than Paltrow).

yes feel slightly foolish, but from now on you are my flirt buddy. just dont be male

 

[snowqueen]

yes feel slightly foolish, but from now on you are my flirt buddy. just dont be male

Well you're going to have to improve your flirting if your flirt thread is anything to go by ... I am a queen after all.

I am incapable of deception. Anyway you can just check my profile pic. Frankly I think Nigella has nothing on me

 

[thebarran]

Well you're going to have to improve your flirting if your flirt thread is anything to go by ... I am a queen after all.

I am incapable of deception. Anyway you can just check my profile pic. Frankly I think Nigella has nothing on me

that thread did not go as planned, ended up being more or less banter and no flirt. never really got a chance

And i am the king intp, rose to the challenges overcame great adversities and slaughtered the dragon, oh wait that st george.

 

[Felan]

that thread did not go as planned, ended up being more or less banter and no flirt. never really got a chance

And i am the king intp, rose to the challenges overcame great adversities and slaughtered the dragon, oh wait that st george.

I am to blame for some of that but I never really took it serious. If only you had paid me the ransom fees I wouldn't have held your thread hostage.

 

[snowqueen]

that thread did not go as planned, ended up being more or less banter and no flirt. never really got a chance

not really surprising given this is the INTP forum. I wouldn't spot if someone was flirting with me irl if it hit me in the face!

This thread has made me happy though - I like making friends with you.

 

[thebarran]

This thread has made me happy though - I like making friends with you.

how sweet x

You melting?

 

[XIII]

=

 

[thebarran]

I am to blame for some of that but I never really took it serious. If only you had paid me the ransom fees I wouldn't have held your thread hostage.

Yes felan is to blame.

But really was that thread so bad? I had a laugh while doing it so it served its purpose.

 

[thebarran]

hey xiii check my profile pic out. do you like? does it make you wish you were female xD

 

[snowqueen]

how sweet x

You melting?

It would be a big mistake to imagine that - but frost has its own charm - let's say I'm twinkling.

 

[XIII]

=

 

[thebarran]

not as far off 40 than you think (ok 6 years isnt exactly close but i feel i should be 40 at least compared to most around me, despite my immature post in these forums !?!

just admit it boy, you want me... hm hmmm hmmmmmm what a catch i am hmmmm hmm oh yeah ooooooh yeeeeeaaaaaah

 

[Deleted member 1424]

@Barren

What XIII really wants to say is "the cut off face of the chick makes me happy I'm male."

 

[XIII]

=

 

[snowqueen]

not as far off 40 than you think (ok 6 years isnt exactly close but i feel i should be 40 at least compared to most around me, despite my immature post in these forums !?!

just admit it boy, you want me... hm hmmm hmmmmmm what a catch i am hmmmm hmm oh yeah ooooooh yeeeeeaaaaaah

Dammit I feel I should be 40 too.