Everything makes me angry.

[Bird]

I don't know what to do. How pathetic, I know ):
When I'm angry, I am an emotional mess and I
tend to harbour and hold and then go off and it's
very vicious and quite mean. I have been lashing
out inappropriately a little in the past couple of
months. However I can feel myself growing infinitely
more angry to the point where I fantasize about
brutally dismembering others. Usually when I feel
any sort of strong emotion like anger I run and that
alleviates the stress and the frustration and the
anger. Lately though this only seems to intensify my
anger as I imagine my feet slapping against the
concrete coming down very hard against the rib
cages, jaw lines, collars, knees of others.

 

[GYX_Kid]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YV9Oj-vhLkE

 

[ProxyAmenRa]

The anger is a symptom of an underlying issue.

 

[Bird]

The anger is a symptom of an underlying issue.

I know. I know what the underlying issue
is I'm just unsure how to solve the problem
at this moment in time so I need to know
how to handle the anger in a hopefully
constructive way in the meantime.

 

[ProxyAmenRa]

I know. I know what the underlying issue
is I'm just unsure how to solve the problem
at this moment in time so I need to know
how to handle the anger in a hopefully
constructive way in the meantime.

I'm sorry I can't give you much advice on that. When ever I want to get my mind off things I read a book or play a computer game.

 

[nihilen.]

gruesome fantasies are very healthy, don't censor them and don't feel guilty for having them; embrace and develop them.

 

[Deleted member 1424]

Sorry, I just couldn't help myself. I wish you the best of luck, truly.

 

[GYX_Kid]

gruesome fantasies are very healthy, don't censor them and don't feel guilty for having them; embrace and develop them.

why not, +1


i didn't really mean anything by the curbstomp video. your post just reminded me of it

 

[crippli]

I envy you.

 

[Words]

I know. I know what the underlying issue
is I'm just unsure how to solve the problem
at this moment in time so I need to know
how to handle the anger in a hopefully
constructive way in the meantime.

Meditate? It's an internal problem so...

 

[kantor1003]

I think we should write something provoking. Something that will get her anger to boil completely over so that she will end up having 10-20 minutes of matter crushing outbursts. I think it helps to get things out of your system. Should I start? Sigh..Ok.. I'll try: "stop with the nagging bitch, you probably just have your period. Grow the fuck up and learn how to deal with things not going your pretty face way all the time. Your manipulative tricks using your womanly parts can only get you so far here in life."

 

[Melllvar]

Without going into personal anecdotes, I used to have the same sort of problems, not so much anger problems because I'm really a pretty laid back guy, but some combination of stress and life problems that were causing me to be a really angry mother fucker pretty much all the time (I suppose that's effectively "anger problems", I just meant that it was circumstantial and not something I normally deal with, unlike other people I've met who just have a really bad temper pretty much all the time regardless).

Anyway, the main ways I remember dealing with it were:

1) Martial arts, among other things beating the crap out of a punching bag until you're so tired you can't even express your hatred for the world/your life anymore, and also sparring was nice because when someone's trying as hard as they can to choke you unconscious all the other issues in your life get forgotten pretty fast. In general though it simultaneously allows you to take your anger out on something, distracts you from your problems, and exhausts you at the same time (which I think deals with it pretty well).

Of course it sounds like you just run instead, so you're pretty much already doing this just with another sport. If it isn't helping, I dunno what else to say.

2) Weed always helped me with this kind of thing too. It really relaxes you when you're getting angry/stressed out from your problems. Anxiety medication like xanax (or any other downer) would probably achieve the same effect, and is probably what a doctor would recommend, but pills will fuck you up and make it hard to continue your life, where as weed's pretty harmless aside from the social stigma and legal issues.

3) The permanent solution is probably to change whatever is wrong with your life that is causing you to be pissed off all the time. Of course that may not be convenient or even possible, but in my experience the longer you live in that kind of misery the more it'll change you as a person until you probably won't be the same for a very long time after you're out of the situation, if ever again.

I highly recommend changing your situation, even if you say you can't, it'll most likely just go downhill until you have to anyway. Trust me, I already went down this path for about 5 years, thinking it was just an issue of needing to tell myself how I was suppose to feel about things, mind over matter and whatnot, until I was having panic attacks and couldn't sleep at night because I'd stay awake fantasizing about some truly terrible things. I still wonder what I might have ended up like if I hadn't gone through all that.

So, um, yeah, that's my 2 cents (and then some), for whatever it's worth.

 

[GYX_Kid]

I think we should write something provoking. Something that will get her anger to boil completely over so that she will end up having 10-20 minutes of matter crushing outbursts. I think it helps to get things out of your system. Should I start? Sigh..Ok.. I'll try: "stop with the nagging bitch, you probably just have your period. Grow the fuck up and learn how to deal with things not going your pretty face way all the time. Your manipulative tricks using your womanly parts can only get you so far here in life."

that'll get you laid with her.



am i doing it right?

 

[kantor1003]

that'll get you laid with her.



am i doing it right?

hmm, not sure. Depends on what will get her off (not in a sexual sense), and we don't know that yet. Perhaps we should write some more provocative things just to make sure? Or just wait and see?
I think I'll stand by for now. I don't want to bear all the burden on my shoulders :P

 

[crippli]

gruesome fantasies are very healthy, don't censor them and don't feel guilty for having them; embrace and develop them.

Surly you must be joking. I have a recurring dream. That I have killed two people and about to be discovered for the un deed. It's to the point that I no longer know if I did or did not kill them.

 

[Agapooka]

Don't underestimate the power of someone who's willing to listen to you and shuts the fuck up while they do so.

 

[Artsu Tharaz]

Get some sleep.

 

[echoplex]

I dunno, what about playing some violent video games? I know that works for some.

I find that when I'm really angry exercise really helps, but that's only because my poor physical state was mostly causing the anger. Other times, the anger's simply caused by the fact that I can't control reality the way I'd like. I get really angry about daily repetitive tasks -- cleaning, eating, brushing teeth, having to constantly 'deal' with things to get the desired output. The anger's not directed at people, or even about them, it's just a general anger at things, weakness, limitation, monotony, etc.. I imagine a vacation or a new hobby would help with this sort of anger, anything to shake things up.

But, if you're angry at specific people then I might suggest talking to them about it, if/when reasonably possible.

 

[Glordag]

I agree with the idea of martial arts. Something like Yoga might help, also. Anything with sort of "fluid" motions that can occupy your mind and help take you to a better place. Maybe do some painting. Meditation could help. I would also second the point that getting enough sleep really helps.

If all else fails, start collecting various beetles and rodents, then set up an organized death match style arena for them. Make them race each other and dismember the losers.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

1)

2)

3)

 

[Oblivious]

I misread this topic as "Everything makes me Hungry"

Suffice to say reading the OP made me rather confused.

 

[Artsu Tharaz]

I misread this topic as "Everything makes me Hungry"

Suffice to say reading the OP made me rather confused.

I lol'd and lol'd

 

[Jennywocky]

I misread this topic as "Everything makes me Hungry". Suffice to say reading the OP made me rather confused.

Angry teeth scare me.

Usually anger of that intensity is (duh) misplaced aggression. I agree with a strategy of:

1. Finding some productive outlet for the rage (vs destructive or hurtful outlet).

2. Figuring out (whether through therapy or whatever) what the real source of anger is

3. Making life changes to alleviate the issue


Like someone else related, I'm not one to get aggressively angry either.... I typically get depressed or indifferent. There have been a few times when I was murderously angry, though, in situations that were not volatile in themselves. I have mentioned my dad was/is a raging alcoholic... and I remember when I was in high school, on a few occasions, I'd be standing in the kitchen and could hear him snoring off a drunken stupor in the living room on the recliner, and suddenly I would feel an intense compulsion to take one of the knives out of the drying rack next to me and just stab him over and over. It was bad enough that I had to leave the room, because i wasn't sure what I was going to do. In that case, I'm pretty sure why I had anger directed at him, but depending on the situation, sometimes we bury it even more deeply... and if we can't either diffuse it into other things or uncover the source and chance the circumstance, eventually we are apt into doing something we'll later regret.

 

[Dimensional Transition]

Now what sort of underlying issue is this, then? You don't have to tell us exactly what it is if you don't feel comfortable with it, but you could give some sort of vague hint, maybe?

I don't even know, maybe I'm just a nosy person.

 

[EvilScientist Trainee]

Thank God you're not Hulk.

Spoiler

 

[Oblivious]

BIRD!!!!!! SMASH!!!!

 

[nihilen.]

Surly you must be joking. I have a recurring dream. That I have killed two people and about to be discovered for the un deed. It's to the point that I no longer know if I did or did not kill them.

I'm not.

 

[Cavallier]

I identify with the OP. I work out (also the martial arts is a good idea) until I'm exhausted and the endorphins help. Usually the anger is caused by my feeling trapped.

 

[GYX_Kid]

like some of the posts in here, recommend

martial arts/any physical activity
introducing something exciting into life that is currently lacking

for obsessive moments though i plan to someday make a flash game where you can have your own personal hell and draw your enemies, then get them mutilated in various ways.
though not as satisfying as getting raw physical output into it
if you get good at martial arts, maybe you can use self defense

 

[Moocow]

I don't know what to do. How pathetic, I know ):
When I'm angry, I am an emotional mess and I
tend to harbour and hold and then go off and it's
very vicious and quite mean. I have been lashing
out inappropriately a little in the past couple of
months. However I can feel myself growing infinitely
more angry to the point where I fantasize about
brutally dismembering others. Usually when I feel
any sort of strong emotion like anger I run and that
alleviates the stress and the frustration and the
anger. Lately though this only seems to intensify my
anger as I imagine my feet slapping against the
concrete coming down very hard against the rib
cages, jaw lines, collars, knees of others.

Well you did just call yourself pathetic. You're angry at yourself for whatever reasons. We tend to lash out at others more quickly and frequently when we are frustrated with ourselves over something. It's not your fault that you're angry, or anyone else's. It's more of a matter of having been taught over time to condemn and feel condemned, rather than look at the big scheme of things and where we can fit into it all. Some people tend to look at themselves in terms of "what's wrong with me" rather than "what can I learn?" There's nothing wrong with you, in my opinion.

Meditation is a good idea but it's important to know what you're doing and why, and there are so many flawed, misdirected forms of meditation.

 

[Abraxas]

I know. I know what the underlying issue
is I'm just unsure how to solve the problem
at this moment in time ...

If you're unsure then you shouldn't even try to solve the problem just yet. You seem to put too much effort into solving it. Put the whole problem into perspective, you know, think big! I'm not trying to depreciate the problem, but we all have them, it's just that the importance of a probem depends on the perspective they're viewed through.

You must think it's ridiculous that, say, Paris Hilton's biggest problem today might be that she just got plain Evian to drink instead of a bottle of Bling H2O. You think it's ridiculous and so does pretty much anyone else. Without actually knowing the nature of your existing problem, I know that globally the major consensus would be that your problem is also 'ridiculous'.

I know... I'm apathetic.

 

[Reluctantly]

Isn't this essentially what Jung came to understood as neurosis?

If we tell her that she's doing something wrong and that the anger is a product of that, aren't we telling her to find ways to avoid, subdue, and/or let it out on something else (sports and exercise), rather than utilize and accept it?

I say find ways to act it out with success. Sometimes just yell or get in someone's face if you think it will help. If this can be done without negative consequences, surely it would be better than being tolerant of its causes and keeping it inside where it becomes turmoil and torments you?

I guess it's easier said then done for some though...

 

[Reluctantly]

. It's not your fault that you're angry, or anyone else's.

That's a bad philosophical contradiction btw

 

[Bird]

If you're unsure then you shouldn't even try to solve the problem just yet. You seem to put too much effort into solving it. Put the whole problem into perspective, you know, think big! I'm not trying to depreciate the problem, but we all have them, it's just that the importance of a probem depends on the perspective they're viewed through.

You must think it's ridiculous that, say, Paris Hilton's biggest problem today might be that she just got plain Evian to drink instead of a bottle of Bling H2O. You think it's ridiculous and so does pretty much anyone else. Without actually knowing the nature of your existing problem, I know that globally the major consensus would be that your problem is also 'ridiculous'.

I know... I'm apathetic.

Abraxas let me ask you a quick question:

Based upon this statement how did you
reach the conclusion that I was trying to
solve the root cause of my anger?

I know. I know what the underlying issue
is I'm just unsure how to solve the problem
at this moment in time so I need to know
how to handle the anger in a hopefully
constructive way in the meantime.

Allow me to break this down for you since
we seem to be having a misunderstanding.

I AM TRYING TO FIND WAYS TO DEAL WITH
THE ANGER HEALTHILY NOT TRY TO SOLVE
THE ROOT PROBLEM ON SOME FEMININE
WHIM.

Is that clear for everyone?


I bring this up because you make the comment
that I put too much effort into solving it.
That's really not my goal, my goal is to not
violently attack someone or something terribly
extreme because something has made me upset.


Also, you know that globally my problems
would be seen as ridiculous. That is perfectly
fine that you feel this way but perhaps you
should refrain from using the word "know" until
you actually know. It might be a wise idea for
the future because to put it simply you do not
know.

 

[Agapooka]

Perhaps the archetypal INTP challenges the notion that A necessarily be more desirable than B, where A might be coping, whereas B is solving. Granted, we are not aware of your situation. That said, there seems to be this general consensus that certain things can only be dealt with healthily for so long, before they need to be expressed. That said, when there is no solution in sight, the accumulation of frustration might become exponential, which might mean that any means of expressing might not be capable of catching up with the rate at which the frustration is accumulating.

In order to handle the current stress, it is important to:

1. Find a healthy way to release it.

BUT ALSO

2. Not to feel hopeless that the source thereof cannot be dealt with.

In other words, by creating a constraint whereby we are not permitted to look for a manner to solve the source of your problems, you are creating an image where the situation seems hopeless. From this perspective, no means of healthy release is compatible with a feeling of hopelessness. Hopelessness can, however, effect a sort of compulsion, I suppose.

But, if by healthy, you mean that you do not wish to murder anyone, then this simplifies the issue. In this case, it is sufficient that you distract yourself permanently.

Continue talking about cacti, Bird. No importa que tal vez no tengas un nopal en la frente...

Agapooka

 

[Jennywocky]

BIRD!!!!!! SMASH!!!!

Is that the green "Bill Mantlo" version of Bird or the gray craftier Bird?

Isn't this essentially what Jung came to understood as neurosis?

I thought he said neurosis was the avoidance of legitimate suffering.

Which means, while it's good to get rid of the anger through non-destructive means (i.e., rechanneling it), one has to dive into the core of that anger and swim upstream, to figure out where it stems from, in order to plug it up at the root.

(And usually this means accepting some sort of deep hurt that one experienced but did not want to accept for whatever reason, leading to ways to mask the hurt... including anger.)

 

[Abraxas]

Abraxas let me ask you a quick question:

Based upon this statement how did you
reach the conclusion that I was trying to
solve the root cause of my anger?




Allow me to break this down for you since
we seem to be having a misunderstanding.

I AM TRYING TO FIND WAYS TO DEAL WITH
THE ANGER HEALTHILY NOT TRY TO SOLVE
THE ROOT PROBLEM ON SOME FEMININE
WHIM.

Is that clear for everyone?


I bring this up because you make the comment
that I put too much effort into solving it.
That's really not my goal, my goal is to not
violently attack someone or something terribly
extreme because something has made me upset.


Also, you know that globally my problems
would be seen as ridiculous. That is perfectly
fine that you feel this way but perhaps you
should refrain from using the word "know" until
you actually know. It might be a wise idea for
the future because to put it simply you do not
know.

I know. I know what the underlying issue
is I'm just unsure how to solve the problem
at this moment in time so I need to know
how to handle the anger in a hopefully
constructive way in the meantime.

Your last word in the post above is meantime. That's what led to the conclusion that you were trying to solve the root cause of your anger.

Know = To be certain or sure about.

Certain = Sure, positive, not doubting.

OK, let me refrace this, I have no doubt that people generally find your (or anyone else's) problem(s) to be of low value (changed the word here aswell) compared to problems they consider of higher value. The reason, I have no doubt about this is because the world "changes" as you change your perspective/point of view. I applied quotation marks around the word changes, because I don't think the world literally changes, but at least one can experience a change in their personal value system. One way to experience this change in one's value system could be for example watching a documentary on starving kittens or taking a trip to civil war-torn Somalia, whatever one finds shocking enough.

And on the issue of dealing with one's anger in a healthy manner... When I get caught with feelings of anger, I usually just dwell in it observing the quality and origin of it. That way I can learn so much more of myself and am one step closer to the divine humanity I wish to achieve. In contradiction to the primitive human that would (in a similar situation) go apeshit and shoot all their co-workers. I'm not sure if this is (mentally) healthy, but at least it's not harmful in anyway to anyone or anything in your surroundings.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Perhaps the archetypal INTP challenges the notion that A necessarily be more desirable than B, where A might be coping, whereas B is solving. Granted, we are not aware of your situation. That said, there seems to be this general consensus that certain things can only be dealt with healthily for so long, before they need to be expressed. That said, when there is no solution in sight, the accumulation of frustration might become exponential, which might mean that any means of expressing might not be capable of catching up with the rate at which the frustration is accumulating.

In order to handle the current stress, it is important to:

1. Find a healthy way to release it.

BUT ALSO

2. Not to feel hopeless that the source thereof cannot be dealt with.

In other words, by creating a constraint whereby we are not permitted to look for a manner to solve the source of your problems, you are creating an image where the situation seems hopeless. From this perspective, no means of healthy release is compatible with a feeling of hopelessness. Hopelessness can, however, effect a sort of compulsion, I suppose.

But, if by healthy, you mean that you do not wish to murder anyone, then this simplifies the issue. In this case, it is sufficient that you distract yourself permanently.

Agapooka

This is a pretty insightful post, except for the fact that it was acknowledged in the first response that the problem had to be eventually dealt with. Not to mention it was clarified in the second response.

 

[Lobstrich]

Why would you fantasize about dismembering people? Fantasizing about dropping your feet into people and how it would feel isn't much better..

Why do you think such 'fantasies' are healthy? Because by fantasizing about such things you will never end up doing them? You won't end up doing them if you think they are wrong. Wether you fantasize about them or not. I never said that denying every 'bad' feeling you get is the way to go. I do not believe that. I believe in facing the 'bad' things, one should never let them linger in the body only to grow.

 

[Bird]

Your last word in the post above is meantime. That's what led to the conclusion that you were trying to solve the root cause of your anger.

Know = To be certain or sure about.

Certain = Sure, positive, not doubting.

OK, let me refrace this, I have no doubt that people generally find your (or anyone else's) problem(s) to be of low value (changed the word here aswell) compared to problems they consider of higher value. The reason, I have no doubt about this is because the world "changes" as you change your perspective/point of view. I applied quotation marks around the word changes, because I don't think the world literally changes, but at least one can experience a change in their personal value system. One way to experience this change in one's value system could be for example watching a documentary on starving kittens or taking a trip to civil war-torn Somalia, whatever one finds shocking enough.

And on the issue of dealing with one's anger in a healthy manner... When I get caught with feelings of anger, I usually just dwell in it observing the quality and origin of it. That way I can learn so much more of myself and am one step closer to the divine humanity I wish to achieve. In contradiction to the primitive human that would (in a similar situation) go apeshit and shoot all their co-workers. I'm not sure if this is (mentally) healthy, but at least it's not harmful in anyway to anyone or anything in your surroundings.

:x


I'm sorry for being so sensitive and
taking that personally. I apologise
for coming off rather... aggressively
as well.



Thank you.

 

[Bird]

Why would you fantasize about dismembering people? Fantasizing about dropping your feet into people and how it would feel isn't much better..

Why do you think such 'fantasies' are healthy? Because by fantasizing about such things you will never end up doing them? You won't end up doing them if you think they are wrong. Wether you fantasize about them or not. I never said that denying every 'bad' feeling you get is the way to go. I do not believe that. I believe in facing the 'bad' things, one should never let them linger in the body only to grow.

Oh please, I think that thinking about
hurting other people is perfectly normal
and that everyone does it whether or
not they want to admit it because socially
it is frowned upon and every conditioned
body knows this.


I think of it as a way to be tidy, to neaten
things. To arrange things together in
sequence not necessarily in intended form.
Muscles lined up neatly with muscles. Bones
with bones, dried veins with veins, etc.. etc...
No misunderstandings then (:

 

[Abraxas]

:x


I'm sorry for being so sensitive and
taking that personally. I apologise
for coming off rather... aggressively
as well.



Thank you.

Apology accepted, although IMO there was no need to apologise. I can be inaccurate in expressing my thoughts, maybe it's because there's so much of them.

Or maybe I'm just lazy, impatient or autistic...probably an even amount of all of these.

 

[Agapooka]

This is a pretty insightful post, except for the fact that it was acknowledged in the first response that the problem had to be eventually dealt with. Not to mention it was clarified in the second response.

It was mentioned that she was unsure how to solve the problem. This, combined with the request that this part (solving) of the equation not be considered in our responses, can lead to the perspective that I described. Furthermore, not knowing how to solve a problem (which is exactly the feeling that was expressed by Bird), can eventually lead to a feeling of hopelessness.

I acknowledge that the source of her grief is not something that she wishes to express publicly. It remains, however, that this is an INTP forum and that this personality type seems to have a natural inclination towards problem-solving.

Agapooka

 

[Reluctantly]

I thought he said neurosis was the avoidance of legitimate suffering.

Which means, while it's good to get rid of the anger through non-destructive means (i.e., rechanneling it), one has to dive into the core of that anger and swim upstream, to figure out where it stems from, in order to plug it up at the root.

(And usually this means accepting some sort of deep hurt that one experienced but did not want to accept for whatever reason, leading to ways to mask the hurt... including anger.)

Yeah

I'm confused now, did I contradict something? That's the essence of what I trying to get across rather than have everyone suggest how anger can be re-channeled or avoided. I guess the first line doesn't really fit, but from what I briefly read on the subject I got the distinct impression he was referring more to someone ignoring or subverting their destructive instincts than anything else. You probably know a lot more about this though...so I'm going to shut up now.

 

[Lobstrich]

Oh please, I think that thinking about
hurting other people is perfectly normal
and that everyone does it whether or
not they want to admit it because socially
it is frowned upon and every conditioned
body knows this.

I honestly do not think about being violent like that. All I ever fantasize about is punching people.

I think of it as a way to be tidy, to neaten
things. To arrange things together in
sequence not necessarily in intended form.
Muscles lined up neatly with muscles. Bones
with bones, dried veins with veins, etc.. etc...
No misunderstandings then (:

And this is just what I mean. I get when people get angry they do impulsive things like smash a wall, throw the phone, yell all kinds of stuff, putting down an entire bookshelve or punching a person.

But the minute that the impulsive anger becomes a set of motion that require 'planning' like say burning the phone, or opening the window and removing everything from the windowsill so it doesn't get destroyed in the process, and then pushing the bookshelve out the window. Or not punch the person and then step back and fantasize about how the whole scenario of punching him to the ground and feeling your muscles or or what you were talking about, and that everything will end up exactly how you want it to, with him on the ground and you foot in his chest.. Is in my opnion, fucked up. Sorry to be frank. These things do not come from the anger, they come from something entirely different.


EDIT: And "Oh please" what? That I have an opinion? Hmm. That reaction makes me curious.

 

[Cavallier]

^As a complete thread derailment:

I don't really think about harming people in a physical manner. I imagine giving people a good verbal lashing but not a physical one. Also, the only times I've hit people I didn't really plan it out. It's as if I wake up halfway through my fist swinging forward. No planned thoughts went into it. Hmmm...Well, that doesn't really mean much though.

 

[Lobstrich]

^As a complete thread derailment:

I don't really think about harming people in a physical manner. I imagine giving people a good verbal lashing but not a physical one. Also, the only times I've hit people I didn't really plan it out. It's as if I wake up halfway through my fist swinging forward. No planned thoughts went into it. Hmmm...Well, that doesn't really mean much though.

Why did you then say in your OP that you do fantasize (ie. plan it, in a way) about dismembering people?


EDIT: You mentioning "waking up" halfway through a punch is what I meant about impulsive anger. Which is very normal. I have those experiences myself. You know when you throw a phone or whatever object. You kind of go "Shit.. I liked that phone" after you look at the pieces, hehe.

 

[Lobstrich]

Why did you then say in your OP that you do fantasize (ie. plan it, in a way) about dismembering people?


EDIT: You mentioning "waking up" halfway through a punch is what I meant about impulsive anger. Which is very normal. I have those experiences myself. You know when you throw a phone or whatever object. You kind of go "Shit.. I liked that phone" after you look at the pieces, hehe.

Hey! Cava.. Why did I answer you as if you were Bird? I'm confused. How long have I been talking to you and not Bird?

EDIT: Only this last reply, well you didn't mention anything in your OP, you were just adding how you deal with things. My bad.

 

[dark]

@ bird, I don't know your problem and since you haven't posted it, I won't ask.

What I will say is this, I learned to coop with anger and annoyances when I took yoga for the first time. I am not sure what it was, but I eventually learned to breath "correctly" as they told me, and that seemed to clear my head, it helped me not to be angry.

Admittedly I don't know if it was the yoga breathing or some other factor, but that was about around the time I stopped being angry, I never tend to get angry any more either, I do get annoyed, but find myself breathing slightly different in which the annoyance fades rather quickly.

Also I don't know the extent of your anger, so I don't know if the types of things that calms me, would help you.

If you aren't looking to solve the root of the problem, then all you can do is learn to calm your self when the anger starts. And I also know sometimes we are plunged into situations where we cannot control the events that cause our anger, so I hope you find a way to coop with whatever is going on.