do you know how or like to dance?

[Ghost1986]

today is my last day of classes for the week. i have guitar, International Relations and Salsa. the last will no doubt piss me off. dont get me wrong, i do enjoy dancing salsa, but just like martial arts i get pissed when i cant do simple physical acts. none the less though its still fun to go to a salsa club and dance, at least when i have the guts to walk up to the woman to ask her to dance. aside from salsa i have also gone to a club with my roommate where they play rap, hip hop and pop. i had a very hyper blone show me hoew to dance to that type of music and in my opinion it sucks. i simply do not like that, as i call it, gutter dancing. its just not appealing to me. sure the women may do some interesting and, in my opinion, slutty moves, but it just dosent appeal to me. salsa, tango, ballroom and a few other dances on the other hand do appeal to me. like the club dancing, salsa is a a sexual dance but to me it seems more elagent and sexy rather than crude and slutty. but that just my opinion. i also figure learning to dance will help me with women. I, and other INTPS i think, dont like being touched and from what i have seen most women do like to be touched. so by learning a physical dance, i should be able to acclamate my self to physical contact and make the act of touching less akword for me. this is purely theory.

thougts? opinions? insight?

 

[FacetiousPersona]

My old boyfriend/girlfriend and I had an awkward dance on a cruise. S/he thought that my dancing abilities were terrible.

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

Learning to dance will help you with some women I suppose. I wouldn't know for sure as I have lived my life refusing to dance. I can't stand it. I don't see the allure of it. I don't see the artistry or beauty in it very well. I know it's there but I don't see it. I also don't tend to like the music danced to.

Sorry, not very helpful.

 

[Sugarpop]

No. I think not.

 

[Ghost1986]

Learning to dance will help you with some women I suppose. I wouldn't know for sure as I have lived my life refusing to dance. I can't stand it. I don't see the allure of it. I don't see the artistry or beauty in it very well. I know it's there but I don't see it. I also don't tend to like the music danced to.

Sorry, not very helpful.

i dont expect the dancing to get me the women. i expect the dancing to get me ust to physical contact.

and

all info is helpful!

 

[Ermine]

I don't mind ballroom or any dance where the steps are predetermined. I forgot most the dances I knew, but I actually like that kind of dancing if I know what I'm doing and the other person knows what they're doing. However, the kind of dancing most people specialize in "shakin' your thing to the beat" type stuff. I need to get back into ballroom dancing again. It would help balance my introversion and lack of exercise.

I sound like such a J... :s

 

[Anling]

I confess, I was in the folk dance club when I was little. It was great fun. I can't really do the kind of dancing that most people do though. I would like to learn ballroom dance, that seems like a lot of fun. But, like Ermine, I just don't get the kind where you just do whatever. I need to know what I'm supposed to be doing or I get too nervous about it. If I know what I'm supposed to be doing I can relax, enjoy it, and not have to think about every move.

I suppose it would help acclimate you to being touched. Depending of the style there could be lots to hardly any. Salsa seems like one involving lots of touch. I hope the plan works for you.

 

[chocolate]

I dance quite a bit.

Like you, I like salsa and tango (argentine) (among other dances). I'm not sure whether it will help you with being touched. I say that because in my experience the dance mindset is different than the non-dance mindset. During a dance, it's perfectly normal for a stranger to hold my hand, or much more! But if a random guy touches my hand (even by accident), I still find it weird and don't like it (and recoil slightly). At least for me, the dance and non-dance languages don't overlap. I find salsa sexy but not sexual. It is sensual however (especially the music, it's impossible not to get lost in it). I enjoy club dancing, I don't care if I look slutty because I enjoy myself and enjoy moving my body whichever way the music moves me (but I don't do any intentionally slutty moves). I like mixing styles.

I personally always like a guy who can dance, and it's easier to meet people that way, as usually the 'scene' (say the salsa scene) is quite close-knit and the people tend to be friendly. So my vote is for: yes it will make you more popular with/it easier to meet women.

 

[didyouknow]

I love pre-determined dance. Providing you're with friends and people you can trust, it's a lot of fun. I can't do the 'freestyle' type either. I get really anxious and make excuses. I did go to a school dance once but I made the mistake of accidentally flirting with someone and when they saw me later they wouldn't leave me alone. I have to learn how that thing works... I can never tell if I'm flirting or not!

 

[Ermine]

Just be glad you can flirt. I inadvertently do the opposite.

 

[didyouknow]

The problem is, I can't control it. It comes at random intervals and dissipates just as quickly as it came.

 

[The Fury]

I can't dance but I can make wild gestures that make me look like a mad man whose badly in need of the toilet

 

[Thaklaar]

I only dance alone. It's not something I need to inflict on the general public as much as I enjoy it.

 

[sagewolf]

I used to go to a lot of ceilís when I was younger and so I learned a lot of the Irish group dances, which were a lot of fun, but there don't seem to be any of them around anymore, which kind of sucks, because I really did enjoy them at the time. On the other hand, I don't mind that they're gone that much, because dancing was never an integral part of my life. I can only manage the 'freestyle' sort of dancing when I'm alone in my room. It's not something I want to torture my friends-- or even enemies-- with.

 

[echoplex]

I'm tall, so I don't have to learn to dance....or that's what I choose to believe anyway. I'd probably just keep tripping on my feet if I danced. I do sometimes do this one dance though, which normally precedes using the restroom. Either way, I think it's stupid.

I do, however, like to watch women dance. I think they're better at it. If I was a woman, I'd dance too....among other things.

 

[polarmonk]

I don't mind watching others dance so much.. as for me I have poor co-ordination with my feet xD I would not like to dance with someone else, I don't like being touched (unless I feel utterly comfortable), so I do not think that liking being touched applies to all females.
Hmmm.. the only fully comfortable dancing I do is at gigs, where people don't worry about 'moves'.

 

[ChristopherL]

Learning to dance teaches you something we should all know;
The ability to synchronise complex movements with your partner.
A good dancer should be a good lover, this is what females love about dancing the closeness in engenders and the delights it precludes.

 

[LucasM]

I learned the basics to ballroom dancing, and I do enjoy dancing, but I don't really do it much... all the socializing.

 

[merzbau]

i think bill hicks said it best:
"if you see a man really getting into the music, expressing himself on the dance floor, what does it matter how he is in bed... he's gay. real men don't dance. they sit, sweat and curse."

 

[loveofreason]

Learning to dance teaches you something we should all know;
The ability to synchronise complex movements with your partner.
A good dancer should be a good lover, this is what females love about dancing the closeness in engenders and the delights it precludes.

I don't think 'precludes' is quite the word you were looking for there.


Honestly Ghost... if you take up dance take it up for the joy of movement and to feel the paradoxical freedom created by being constrained to a physical body.


Any other motivation falls short, in my opinion.

(And you may just find that the sexual attraction of others is proportional to your enjoyment of self... but I guess that is your reasoning... learning to enjoy touch...)

 

[ChristopherL]

I don't think 'precludes' is quite the word you were looking for there.

Yes I am aware but I typed it and was unable to think of another word so left it as is.

You're a smart bunch you'll figure it out.

 

[mathy]

I used to dance ballet (for 15 years!). I liked it somewhat, but found it sort of... rigid? Then, I got into Modern dancing (probably around 10-12 years old), which was amazing. The ballet training did help with balance, posture, timing, rhythm, and coordination, but I found modern dance to much more free. Modern dancing is more about the feeling of dancing, and expressiveness rather than control. There are usually predetermined steps, but occasionally improvisation. The really cool thing, is that two different people can perform the same "move" but it can look almost radically different between different people. Sometimes understated, sometimes wildly out of control (but perfectly in control at the same time). THAT was my favorite part. Knowing that you're in control physically, but you really don't FEEL in control (nor do you look it). Oh, and you're barefoot! It's kind of odd that I would so enjoy it, since it very much exposes you (as a person I mean), but for some reason when I danced modern I didn't care what I looked like to other people... it was all about the feeling. (Yes, I know--FEELing... ) It wasn't really a tangible feeling though. Just, a very general feeling... of existence maybe? Of being a little out of control? I don't know.

Anyway, never cared anything for salsa, ballroom, or anything with a partner (including partnered ballet).

 

[Kidege]

I find salsa sexy but not sexual. It is sensual however (especially the music, it's impossible not to get lost in it).

The lyrics, however, tend to be quite stupid. It's one of the reasons why I don't enjoy salsa as much as I might.

 

[Tyria]

Try it out. If you don't like it, you don't have to do it again if you don't want to.

 

[gnomes?!]

I love dancing Salsa!! Basically any Latine dance! But that makes sense since I'm from South America, so I guess it still counts. Right? I mean, I still love doing it

 

[paradoxparadigm7]

I had to giggle after reading your post op Dancing for me is about allowing the music to move me and having fun! Your description just tickled me as it's about a learning of how to touch and be touched. I suppose that could have a bearing on the touching thing, but my hope for you is to just enjoy yourself and the great music.

 

[Assassin]

I can't really dance, I usually just flail my arms around like an awkward windmill but yes, I do enjoy flailing my arms around.

 

[Rook]

I have some theories... That's about it.