Calling older INTPs

[ProxyAmenRa]

Is 30 the new 20 or something?

 

[boondockbabe]

God I hope not. Could'nt pay me enough money to re-live my 20's

 

[ProxyAmenRa]

I'm 22 and I all I think about is how the hell am I going to entertain myself until I am a sufficient age to die. I'm going to be so damn bored.

 

[Melllvar]

I'm 22 and I all I think about is how the hell am I going to entertain myself until I am a sufficient age to die. I'm going to be so damn bored.

You're into math and engineering. I'm pretty sure you can keep yourself busy for a few lifetimes.

I wonder the same thing about how I'm going to pay for all my shit for the next 70+ years. It only gets worse when you start thinking about the possibilities of inflation, kids or significant others, age related health problems, bad investments, etc. Right now I'm only covered for the next 5-15 years. Maybe I'll get lucky and die of a panic attack from worrying about it all.

 

[boondockbabe]

My husband thinks we start a support forum for partners of INTPs. Reading this I'm starting to think mabye he's right.It would certainly help potential partners deal with our idosyncrecies(sp).

 

[Architect]

Interesting. What did you change, and how did you change it? If you had to offer any advice on that front, what would it be?

I suppose life's a game, and sometimes you've just got to play it if you want to succeed in it. (It's just pretty frustrating that you can't really stop playing if you don't want to!)

Sorry, missed this followup.

The advice I'd give is in the form of a dating metaphor. I'd recommend finding a girlfriend that seems like one you'd really like long term. While dating her make sure to play the field and date lots of other girls, what'll happen is that when you hit midlife you'll feel satisfied that you played the field, and probably discover that your original girlfriend is who you want to marry.

In other words, pick a science or engineering field (ideally) or something involving computers at least, get the degree/job in it, and meanwhile play the field (study all sorts of other things.) What may happen is that in you 40's you'll find that the work you did all along is really what you like, you'll have the benefit of having built a career on it all those years, and the experience of trying lots of other things. That will set the stage for you to focus on your true interest.

At this point I've tried writing, art, electronics design, music, hard science, small business, athletics, agriculture, voluntary simplicity, etc, and because of that experience found that writing software is my core interest. I'm lucky enough that while playing the field I've been working as a software developer so I have a career to build on.

 

[Architect]

The difference between my 20's and 30's can be summed up in this: I moved away from having to be a logical robot and became a person with feeling and values to complement my rationality ... without feeling shame or apologizing for it.

Interesting, my path was the opposite. My earlier life was more about feeling and values due to various circumstances (how I was raised and early interest in the humanities). Its not until midlife that I was able to assert my true interests and become a logical robot.

It's a shame that two decades had to be spent learning skills and acquiring traits that others often have in spades, but I guess we all have stuff to work on. I am positioned for productivity and life fulfillment at this point. I'm hoping my 40's and 50's just get better and better.

Amen to that sister!

 

[Haiduc]

Don't agree. The difference is INVOLVEMENT. If one is an introverted non-feeler, and there is mutual thinking going on, rudeness would matter.

Agreed rudeness would matter - internet forums still have their own forms of etiquette that one should try to adhere to etc. The point I was trying to get at was that the lack of direct, face-to-face contact on the internet gives you a lot more freedom and therefore a lot less to worry about.

For example, if someone at work came up to me and asked me a technical question, they would expect me to provide a technical answer. I can provide the answer. However, the conventional rules of workplace behaviour would mean they would also expect me to look like I was listening, look like I cared, and looked like I was interested in what they were saying. The reality is that I might be all three of those, but I just don't look like it.

In fact, at one point I was finding myself so preoccupied with trying to give the impression that I was listening to people and taking everything in... that I was focussing all my attention on that, and not actually listening to a word they were saying!

Fortunately, with internet-based communication, I don't have to worry quite so much about things like that.

And I suppose this kinda ties in with the thread. Now, I just try and focus on what people are saying to me, and I try not to worry about how I'm coming across right at that moment. INTPs can often appear aloof or disinterested, even if they're not. If I ask follow-up questions -- which is usually essential because people never explain themselves properly -- it demonstrates that I'm listening. This is something I've learned with time (and experience).

So in a wider context, have any of you guys tried to cultivate any kind of INTP-based image? (I'm thinking mainly at work.)

We're the mad professors, right? And TV/film is full of these types of characters, so people are familiar with the idea. Put another way, have you played on this and tried creating a persona that you're comfortable with (and that is consistent with your true self), yet is one that others are also comfortable with? (For some reason, I've now just got an image of Doc Brown in my head.)

We often feel like we don't fit in. But we're not the first of us to have ever existed. Perhaps we can leverage some of these stereotypes to our benefit.

 

[Vrecknidj]

Everything was going just fine until my wife had a mid-life crisis a few weeks before I was told I had blood clots that were likely to kill me within the day. (Obviously that didn't come to pass.) That was a pretty weird stretch.

Things are getting back to normal now.

Oh, get some exercise if you don't already. It gets a LOT harder to cope with physical limitations after about 35.

Dave

 

[Architect]

So in a wider context, have any of you guys tried to cultivate any kind of INTP-based image? (I'm thinking mainly at work.)

Yes. I've given up on any more advancement, there are no further goals & roles that are interesting to me. I act generally weird and unacceptable, but I'm senior enough that it doesn't seem to matter.

 

[Kurious Kat]

Aren't there ANY JOBS out there like this?
I don't really like people in a face to face situation.Unless I'm in charge. but then I don't like the responsibility.

OMG! Right! I have read several of your posts, and I swear I think you are my mental twin. Wouldn't want a real twin because then I would be forced to interact with you on a regular basis.

 

[Kurious Kat]

39
My situation seems to be a little different from most of you guys. Relationships-wise, I'm good. My husband is a little INTP too. We think alike on almost everything. He's just way better at empathizing with other people than I am. If I hadn't found him, I would still be alone. My problem is with finding an occupation. I have hated every job I have ever had and am currently unemployed. I still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up! I would love to do something involving research and linguistics. Like the person who traces down the origins of words and their meanings throughout recorded history. I know there's a name for that, but I can't think of what it is. I can just see myself sitting in a dark corner of a huge library surrounded by stacks of ancient books (heaven). Anybody know where I can get a job like that?

 

[BigApplePi]

The Vatican has a library. Very old. You might apply there. Might have to convert to Catholicism though. Not too big a price to pay for what you want.

 

[boondockbabe]

OMG! Right! I have read several of your posts, and I swear I think you are my mental twin. Wouldn't want a real twin because then I would be forced to interact with you on a regular basis.

I always wanted a sister I could relate to

 

[boondockbabe]

The Vatican has a library. Very old. You might apply there. Might have to convert to Catholicism though. Not too big a price to pay for what you want.

I think organized religion is a good idea. It helps control the people. And makes good warriors-someone told me once that a "believer fights as hard as three non-belivers"

and thank you for the thought, but it would be a cold day in hell before I embraced organized religon again. which says a lot since I don't believe in hell either.

Mabye I'll flip to the J side and try evil scientist.

 

[BitRogue]

I would love to do something involving research and linguistics. Like the person who traces down the origins of words and their meanings throughout recorded history. I know there's a name for that, but I can't think of what it is.

Etymology. For someone who's interested in words, thats a pretty poor performance ..... (Just kidding!!) [ <-automatic reaction due to a lifetime of abuse taken through all the misunderstandings of my rapid fire one off comments. I suspect this forum is probably a safer place than most for this, but still just playing safe )

Oh, and welcome to the forums.

 

[Kurious Kat]

Etymology. For someone who's interested in words, thats a pretty poor performance ..... (Just kidding!!) [ <-automatic reaction due to a lifetime of abuse taken through all the misunderstandings of my rapid fire one off comments. I suspect this forum is probably a safer place than most for this, but still just playing safe )

Oh, and welcome to the forums.

LOL! No, please don't apologize. You're absolutely right. I knew what the word was somewhere in the foggy recesses of my brain, I was just too lazy to put forth the required effort to remember it at that moment. Thanks for keeping me straight!

 

[Kurious Kat]

The Vatican has a library. Very old. You might apply there. Might have to convert to Catholicism though. Not too big a price to pay for what you want.

No thank you. Besides the commute would be a killer! Seriously, right now I'm so desperate. I'll settle for any job that doesn't require much interaction with other people. I'm a woman, so my choices are extremely limited. Especially in the South. You're suppose to be all sweet and nice and crap. Which I actually really am, I just don't like having to prove it all the time by being all sweet and nice!!!!

 

[Kurious Kat]

I always wanted a sister I could relate to

You know, it's funny. I say that I like being alone and that I don't like talking to people. So, why am I so excited to finally find other people like me? I think it's not that I don't like people at all, it's just that 99% of the people I come in contact with out in the world are so alien to me.

As a fellow female INTP, do you ever feel guilty or depressed because you don't seem to be able to relate to other women at all? Maybe you're a very confident person who embraces your uniqueness. Me, I'm a self-doubter. Until I discovered what an INTP was, I thought there was something seriously wrong with me!

Sorry, maybe this should be moved to another thread?

 

[boondockbabe]

You know, it's funny. I say that I like being alone and that I don't like talking to people. So, why am I so excited to finally find other people like me? I think it's not that I don't like people at all, it's just that 99% of the people I come in contact with out in the world are so alien to me.

As a fellow female INTP, do you ever feel guilty or depressed because you don't seem to be able to relate to other women at all? Maybe you're a very confident person who embraces your uniqueness. Me, I'm a self-doubter. Until I discovered what an INTP was, I thought there was something seriously wrong with me!

As far as being alone and not talking to to people goes I can totally relate. I have ben trying to "fit-in" to the external world since I left California almost twenty years ago. I even adoped a hick personality just so I would be less likely to be singled out.
That being said, I have not left my computer alone since I found this site. It has totally changed my life-In a positive way. I have not talked to my "artificial" friends in a while. I never could relate to people. And by the time I got into my late twenties it had gotten to such an extreme that I was very confrontational and borderline homicidal. I just could not deal with those people any more. I actually Qualified for disability because I could no longer handle Interactions with the general public. The superficiality of it all is still bewildering. I have been home for a year now and after a winter of Introspection have been able to come to terms with myself as far as who I am and what I've been through. I probably would have commited scuicide or killed someone if I had not gotten out. I was so angry because the world looked me over and left me to rot in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of freakin idiots.-google "Jerry Springer" and thats what I had to endure. Every day, for years.

As for feeling guilty or depressed because I cannot relate to other women? Yea sometimes. But I am sooo totally not interested in the whole "barefoot and pregnant" thing. I honestly think kids are annoying and as a rule a nuisince. So It is really hard to relate to women( most of whom think kids are everything) Add that to the fact that my parents split when I was 12. and being the oldest I took over dad's jobs-fixing fence, home repairs,car repairs and so forth. And it really sucked because I could relate more to the guys. Guys dont want to be your friend either. They usually just want to fuck you . exception made for the gentelmen here. They just want to bs.

I got into the horses as an escape. But that really didn't work either. I still love to ride. And I do train a little still. But only for fun. and talk about some fucked up shit- Last year after I won the world championship. My "best friend" at the time was so upset about me getting a W.C. before she could that on the way home from the show we had to stop and dump garbage in her mother-in-laws driveway!!!! WTF? Could it get any more draining?

So generally I don't bother having many interactions with the outside world. There are a few individuals. But for the most part I hang around here where shit makes sense most of the time.

As for confidence-I have some, Mostly when on the back of a horse. And even then I have issues- I still tell people that I don't think I deserve the W.C.- I got them because I was the fastest. But I am still not happy with the way I performed that day. I just happened to be better than the other competitors. I spent over an hour yesterday trying weither I should wait and but a new tank for my truck or but the old used one full of rust. This is a no brainer-You dont want rust in your fuel. But I second-guessed myself forever. I dod not feel better until five hours later when my hubby told me I make the right decision. So you're not alone on that issue for sure

And as for thinking there was somthing wrong with you. Don't feel bad. If I qualified for disability, Then I was able to convince the system that there was somthing wrong with me. Now,I was a little fucked up at the time. But I think deep down inside I knew if I could just get a break I could re-group and move on. The disability gave me the breathing room I so desprately needed to process the years of bullshit I had to endure. (warning) If there is one comment about me scamming the system I'm gonna give it to ya- So be prepared.

I hope this helps.

BTW This is the calling all older INTP thread so I think you're fine.

 

[Kurious Kat]

We really are mental twins. Do you feel more comfortable with animals than with people? OK this is gonna sound crazy, but I think animals understand me better than people do! Whenever I'm upset - and I mean really desperately and hopelessly upset, I go outside and cry to my dogs! There is no other human who I could even express my feelings to that would even come close to understanding. And BTW, I also have that anger towards the outside world I completely understand where you're coming from. I was in a customer service job for about 5 years. I came out of it suicidal and hating the sight of other people. I literally fantasized about running away - just disappearing from everybody and everything that I knew. I was soooo messed up. I had a mini nervous breakdown. I say mini because I didn't have to be hospitalized. It was right about that time that I found out I was PREGNANT! And, just like you, I did not like children either. I could not comprehend why other women would think that I was interested in hearing all about their little brats. Oh and the worst was when they would bring them to work and expect me to talk to them and play with them and generally act like they were just so wonderful! I thought they were irritating little insects. BUT THEN I had my own! Suffice it to say that I have two sons (thank God I didn't have girls!!!) that I love more than anyone or anything on earth including myself. But I still don't like other people's children Is that also part of being an INTP? Being a hypocrite? And I despise hypocrites! So hypocritical, right?
You are so right about men. I got really lucky with my husband (I think he's INTP too) but, all the other relationships I've had with men usually had one final outcome - boredom. I slept with them and got bored or I had no interest in sleeping with them and they got bored. However, that being said, I have always preferred the company of males. My brain seems to work more like theirs. I just simply am not interested in the same things that other women seem to be. And most women seem so immature and needy. I have one friend (how pathetic is that) and I can only take her for so long and I have to escape. She's always wanting me to go places with her. Why can't she go by her freaking self?

 

[boondockbabe]

And I always felt like my horses understood me and loved me for who I was. Then, one of my good friends,who is finishing his pysc. degree. loaned me a book. It's called Hore Sense and the Human Heart. Its a little fluffy but I began to understand the connection. They speak about the "human-animal bond" what itis and Why it feels so good and helps so much. I recommend reading it. It has been very insightful. here is a link-

http://www.amazon.com/Horse-Sense-Human-Heart-Spirituality/dp/1558745238
They actually use horses in lots of different therapys.

Funny, I was in costomer service when I was homicidal. Mabye its just the job. I'm not sure you can take that much shit every day and be ok.

I'm a hypocrite too sometimes-this is usually caused by ignorance.

My "friend" is a drama Queen and a trouble maker. I usually make her go by herself.Its just too much.

 

[Kurious Kat]

Did I fail to mention that I had horses when I was a kid and have been thinking about getting some again? My husband says they're too expensive, but I have been thinking about it for months now. How funny is that?

 

[boondockbabe]

The expense is an issue. But you can usually go find a barn in your area that will give you lessons in exchange for manual labor. And most horse people are not socialable so you can expect to be left alone for the most part. Anyone interested in getting involved with horses is welcome to pm me and I will assist them in finding a reputable barn in their area. There are some real assholes out there and some imposters. Do not hesitate to ask for references from the instructor/barn if you decide to go it alone.

 

[Haiduc]

Are you two the same person?!!!

I've always thought it must be harder being an INTP in the States than in the UK (definitely worth a thread on its own). Particularly a female INTP in the Deep South. Hugh Grant's done a lot for us bumbling, incompetent buffoons.

A (British) friend of mine married a girl from Kentucky. I went out for the wedding and travelled round for a couple of weeks - Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas, Tennessee - so I've seen a little bit of the area. Everyone's so overwhelmingly friendly and optimistic. I certainly think I would I find it a bit of a struggle. Maybe it's different if you grew up there.

Anyway, I don't know what MBTI type his wife was, but she was a quiet, liberal vegetarian, and she always seemed more suited to Britain (although she hated the cold weather). In the end, she developed mental issues and they got divorced.

 

[boondockbabe]

Well, having to be nice and friendly all the time CAN drive you crazy

We are similar. Living in the boondocks has its ups and downs. Because the towns are soo small ( I live outside the city limits of a town that has a population of 115 people) everybody knows everybody. Its kinda like a big family after a while. You put up with each other because you are all in the same situation.And just like family you're not gonna like everybody. Lots of people have been here for generations-so you start out as a "outsider" in the truest sense of the word. But after a while they accept you and then you're just family. I like it most of the time. It takes some getting used to, You cannot do anything in a town of 115 people without everyone knowing about it.
For example: When we bought our house it was printed in the local newspaper!!
Funny thing about small towns is this- reguardless of who you are everybody helps everybody. When the big freeze happened in '07 the Red Cross was amazed because even though there were thousands of people without power almost nobody came to the shelters-Why you might ask? Because out here neibors take care of neibors. So if you were without power in a sub-freezing ice storm with no way to heat your home you just went to your neibors. I use my neibors basement any time when we have a Tornado warning. He told me if he's not home to break in-He just wants to make sure we have shelter.
It's a little odd, but out in the sticks most people still operate by the Golden Rule. I think that is what makes people in the south and in the rural areas so nice. They are used to being nice. Its a habit. If you treat everyone badly then when you need help there's nobody who wants to help you. So out here at least, it pays to be nice. Many times out here people have helped me. And in return all they ask is that I help somebody who needs it when I can.
That being said. DO NOT expect to have much real privacy. Everyone knows everyone so we all know each others buisness, Yet another reason to be nice.

You will have plenty of physical privacy-my nearest neibor is 1/4 mile away.I think thats about .5 Km. So you can sit on the back porch in your underwear and sip coffie in the morning

 

[boondockbabe]

I have long made the joke that you must "assimilate" or be inhillated(sp)

Out here nobody gets it. Mabye u will.

 

[fullerene]

Very cool.

A friend told me of a psych experiment where people from different parts of the world are asked "if a boat was going to sink and your child, your grandparent, your wife, and your brother were on it, who would you save and why?" In the West, the answer is an almost unanimous (I've never heard a dissenting opinion when telling this story, and I always let people answer without my telling them) "the child, because they have the most life left to live." In other cultures, however, the answer is nearly-unanimously-different for equally good (if not better) reasons. In particular, in the Asian cultures, it's: "the grandparent, because they've already accumulated a life's worth of experience and can pass it on to many young people before they die, while a child may turn out to be a fool or die in some other accident before they reach that point."

I kind of have a shortage of respectable old people in my life (I'm in my early 20s), but I'm really glad to have seen/read this thread. In particular, companionship in a relationship seems to be the most common advice I've been hearing from aging people. Very much appreciated. Do any older members want to dissent and criticize that point of view for any reason?

 

[Ouroboros]

43 here. I was in your shoes exactly. My 30th b-day was a bad one, and I was in what seemed to be a pretty bad place. I had no direction, had just dropped out of engineering school (2nd degree) and was very alone. It actually turned around that year. My 31st year was among my best.

Keep your head up and keep plugging along. Some days are harder than others. Don't give up, but don't stress out feeling that you have do always consciously "do something". I met my future wife while sitting on the curb out in front of my apartment, not doing a damn thing. 13 years later, we have a couple of kids and all is well, at least in a spiritual sense. Of course, there are plenty of things to be depressed about, as most any INTP will tell you (that has not achieved nirvana, at least), but that's life. Thing is, periodically, things are "great" and you live for those moments.

Also, keep up your interests. I love playing music. I have been very much into Yoga for a couple of years now, and what a difference that has made. Things like that will keep you going even when all else seems to be going bad. Pick up an interest that you have wanted to, but never did. Sounds like you have the time. You might be surprised in the future how valuable this time in your life will have been.

30 is still young. You will see soon enough that you are not at the end of the road. Best of luck.

last but not least, turn off the boob-tube. It is poison, and has sucked many a life dry.

 

[BigApplePi]

Do you feel more comfortable with animals than with people? But I still don't like other people's children Is that also part of being an INTP? Being a hypocrite? And I despise hypocrites! So hypocritical, right?

KK. I just picked out that. If one is an introvert, they would be interested in things they possess that are valuable to them. I love my animals, not other people's. Only if I decided to specialize in animals would I take an interest in other people's animals. Extroverts tend to specialize in people things, I suppose. Not hypocrisy at all IMO, just specializing.

 

[Kurious Kat]

KK. I just picked out that. If one is an introvert, they would be interested in things they possess that are valuable to them. I love my animals, not other people's. Only if I decided to specialize in animals would I take an interest in other people's animals. Extroverts tend to specialize in people things, I suppose. Not hypocrisy at all IMO, just specializing.

That makes perfect sense! Thank you. I've got to get over some of this guilt about not feeling the way the world tells me I'm suppose to feel. I'm very new to this INTP thing. For years I just thought there was something wrong with me. Like I'm socially and emotionally retarded. While that still may be true, atleast there's a reason for it. I don't have to feel bad about myself anymore.

 

[Kurious Kat]

Are you two the same person?!!!

I've always thought it must be harder being an INTP in the States than in the UK (definitely worth a thread on its own). Particularly a female INTP in the Deep South. Hugh Grant's done a lot for us bumbling, incompetent buffoons.

I'm beginning to think we were separated at birth! And as to being a female INTP in the Deep South - OMG, you have no idea. A woman is expected to be sweet and friendly above all else. That's great. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. It makes it a nice place to live. The only problem is, I don't know how to be that warm, sweet, agreeable, docile, perfect Southern belle. When I try to be sweet, I feel like I'm pretending. I'm not a mean person, but I have to make an effort to project that expected sweetness. It's exhausting. I am a loving, caring wife, mother, and daughter. I just don't have the energy or the desire to project loving sweetness to the entire rest of the world!!!

You must be thinking, "Geez, what a witch." Allow me to give you an example. When I go to the supermarket - If I see someone I know : First, I pretend I don't see them, because I don't want to have to talk to them. But, ofcourse, they see me and my kids and they make a bee line towards me. I'm thinking - "Great. Just great." I am then expected to inquire about how they're doing (as well as all other living members of their family) and act like I really care and am really interested, which I am not! I also have to answer a barrage of personal questions because they really are interested and really do care about every minute detail of my life and that of all my family. I can't just simply say "hi" and get on with my shopping. Here that would be considered rude and unfriendly.

 

[boondockbabe]

That makes perfect sense! Thank you. I've got to get over some of this guilt about not feeling the way the world tells me I'm suppose to feel. I'm very new to this INTP thing. For years I just thought there was something wrong with me. Like I'm socially and emotionally retarded. While that still may be true, atleast there's a reason for it. I don't have to feel bad about myself anymore.

AIN'T IT GRAND

BigApplePi-I have a speciality in animals being a horse trainer and I have actually found my introversion to be beneficial. Because I dont care I am able to train the horse without my emotions getting in the way. -At least when working with the horse. I try to avoid the owners at all costs. .

The reasons to have a human-horse-bond:
I love the spirituality of the relationship between horse and rider most. When you are riding a horse it trully is like an extension of yourself. If you are exicited or upset they can sense it. They react to you, no its actually more like they mirror you. You can literally see how a rider is feeling by watching the horse.
Because of this, if something is not working it is always your fault. So figure it out and fix it. It is really engaging to the Thinking. And because horses really are a "mirror of the soul" it helps to be a little Introverted.
Horses are very Tit-for-Tat. So they are also very easy to communicate with. As long as you keep your emotions out of the way and don't take things personally.

 

[Kurious Kat]

You will have plenty of physical privacy-my nearest neibor is 1/4 mile away.I think thats about .5 Km. So you can sit on the back porch in your underwear and sip coffie in the morning

OK, this is getting freaky. I live in the least populated county in my state (no accident). I live a half mile off of the highway behind locked gates. If you get in here, you're walking. And you'd better be able to run fast, because I have two big dogs who don't like strangers. And I have sat on my back porch in my underwear and drank coffee in the morning!!! Swear to God. Okay, it was my nightgown, but still!!

 

[boondockbabe]

I'm beginning to think we were separated at birth! And as to being a female INTP in the Deep South - OMG, you have no idea. A woman is expected to be sweet and friendly above all else. That's great. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. It makes it a nice place to live. The only problem is, I don't know how to be that warm, sweet, agreeable, docile, perfect Southern belle. When I try to be sweet, I feel like I'm pretending. I'm not a mean person, but I have to make an effort to project that expected sweetness. It's exhausting. I am a loving, caring wife, mother, and daughter. I just don't have the energy or the desire to project loving sweetness to the entire rest of the world!!!

You must be thinking, "Geez, what a witch." Allow me to give you an example. When I go to the supermarket - If I see someone I know : First, I pretend I don't see them, because I don't want to have to talk to them. But, ofcourse, they see me and my kids and they make a bee line towards me. I'm thinking - "Great. Just great." I am then expected to inquire about how they're doing (as well as all other living members of their family) and act like I really care and am really interested, which I am not! I also have to answer a barrage of personal questions because they really are interested and really do care about every minute detail of my life and that of all my family. I can't just simply say "hi" and get on with my shopping. Here that would be considered rude and unfriendly.

I just got this post and I am adopting you as my soul-sister

I feel the same way. I am sooo damn tired of having to smile and act like I care. But what are ya gonna do. If you're not nice, theyl'l remember it next time you need help. This is one of the downsides of living in the sticks. Rude and unfriendly starts when you don't wave as they drive by when you're driving. Mabye I should start a "hick thread" whaddya think? We could just bitch about what a pain in the ass it is to live in the sticks.

 

[boondockbabe]

OK, this is getting freaky. I live in the least populated county in my state (no accident). I live a half mile off of the highway behind locked gates. If you get in here, you're walking. And you'd better be able to run fast, because I have two big dogs who don't like strangers. And I have sat on my back porch in my underwear and drank coffee in the morning!!! Swear to God. Okay, it was my nightgown, but still!!

Sometimes I do it naked just 'cause I can.

I just made a hick thread. come and join me

 

[Kurious Kat]

Sometimes I do it naked just 'cause I can.

LOL! Amen, Sister.

 

[fullerene]

I can't just simply say "hi" and get on with my shopping. Here that would be considered rude and unfriendly.

You should come up here to the northeast, where that's the norm.

 

[boondockbabe]

But there are good things about living in the country.

 

[xbox]

I'm 22 and I all I think about is how the hell am I going to entertain myself until I am a sufficient age to die. I'm going to be so damn bored.

You are so freaking right. I'm turning 25 soon, and I'm thinking, god.. what the hell am I going to do.

 

[Kurious Kat]

You are so freaking right. I'm turning 25 soon, and I'm thinking, god.. what the hell am I going to do.

I'm 39 and I still think that. I just need some kind of gainful employment that will not make me want to kill myself. All the personality tests say that INTP's should be scientists, engineers, mathematicians, etc. Well, what the hell are suppose to do if we suck at math?!!! I might as well kill myself now and get it over with.

 

[Ouroboros]

You are so freaking right. I'm turning 25 soon, and I'm thinking, god.. what the hell am I going to do.

mid-20's crisis is very common. I had it. Wound up in the marine corps - not recommended now. Total wild hair. If I had been told two days before I signed up, I would have said you were crazy. The thought had never entered my mind. In retrospect it made alot of sense, but I could not have reasoned it out then.

There is something to be said about doing something completely off the wall (assuming you are doing something that comes from deep within, not just something silly), that can really work out for the best in the long run. Getting out of ruts is key.

 

[BigApplePi]

If you are in your 20's, here's some free advice and I won't even charge you. Find something you like to do that is educational while you are waiting for something better to do. It will be a filler until something practical comes along. It could even lead to something practical but don't count on it.

If you need to get by, then do whatever you have to do. You may not be crazy about it, but you are waiting. As soon as you finish the educational thing, pick up another educational thing and educate yourself. One of those educational things may hit on something for you. If none do, then enjoy yourself at it while waiting as you gotta do now what you gotta do.

If eventually you do hit the jackpot, remember this piece of free advice and send me a nice check.

 

[boondockbabe]

If you are in your 20's, here's some free advice and I won't even charge you. Find something you like to do that is educational while you are waiting for something better to do. It will be a filler until something practical comes along. It could even lead to something practical but don't count on it.

If you need to get by, then do whatever you have to do. You may not be crazy about it, but you are waiting. As soon as you finish the educational thing, pick up another educational thing and educate yourself. One of those educational things may hit on something for you. If none do, then enjoy yourself at it while waiting as you gotta do now what you gotta do.

If eventually you do hit the jackpot, remember this piece of free advice and send me a nice check.

"LIKE"

 

[mck]

It is funny, around 40 I started to get to my self. I no longer tolerated the interference of my family that I have endured with patience for such a long time. I began to be proud of my self without feeling pathetic to do so.

 

[Ouroboros]

It is funny, around 40 I started to get to my self. I no longer tolerated the interference of my family that I have endured with patience for such a long time. I began to be proud of my self without feeling pathetic to do so.

congrats. better late than never.

 

[Minamimoto]

I am 40 years old now ... how am I getting on in life?
ehm...

As for the home front I am lucky. My partner does get my jokes, even the really insane 'out of the box' ones They just pop up & we have a bit of fun over it. He's an INTJ I think ... but has a bit of INTP as well. He also understands me most of the time when I am into something & we share our ideas. My daughter is an INTP & we get along very fine, we understand each other well & can talk about everything really.

For an outsider I think the way my daughter and I have conversations is extremely weird. From whenever she was a little kid & into astronomy, star constellations. I recall asking her when she was 15 when we went shopping for something in town how she dealt with the scientific facts versus religious ideas humanity has... or she pops up in the house & she starts going on about some sort of theoretical physics subject and wants my thoughts about this or that ... when she was a kid she did things like storm down the stairs & declair that finally she found someone on a chat (internet) who does agree with her that people created God instead of the other way around .... I am quite happy in my home surroundings.

As for work I get very frustrated sometimes. You just bump your head into walls of not understanding people or people who think you're being rude when you're only trying to figure out the essence/ priorities/ which course to follow etc. It is amazing how defensive people are, how insecure and full of emo-stuff.
But I hang on to the good bits of my job (there are monthly bills and they just need to be payed... n'est c'est pas) , even though it is sometimes boring when you have to do something you have done before. I seriously just 'wake up' for new and intruiging bits that come along to be worked out, or when I have brainfarts that are worth exploring (just the getting accross is hard sometimes).

I have friends I have a click with. But I am not a very regular friend. We meet now and again. b.t.w: long live the world wide web... that gave me a chance to meet more people in real life I connect with.

o: I'm envious. That's more or less the way I'd choose to live, if I ever had the motivation to stop drifting at sea and exert some control over my life. x] I'm pretty much used to the idea that typical people are gonna rage if you ask them to support their assertions. ._. I love the people who don't.