What kind of bad

[The Gopher]

If you have to be a criminal what kind would you like to be.

 

[Cognisant]

Accountant
Or an illegal arms dealer/designer/manufacturer.

 

[James Black]

Fucking pirate.
Seriously.
And if this whole space colonization thing pans out soon enough, who knows...

 

[Lyra]

I am.

So I'd be myself.

Enjoy your fantasies, though.

 

[Joohanh]

I'd be the cool evil cheesy Umbrella Corporation manager or like, like Darth Vader!

 

[Minuend]

Something that requires strategic planning and cunning.

Or maybe I'd just host a torrentsite.

Or maybe I would be a getaway driver!

 

[James Black]

Or maybe I'd just host a torrentsite.

I thought of that, but after a friend of mine almost went to jail and had to take his site down (pretty well known site at the time, too, still really hasn't been replaced yet) I became super-paranoid and worried about safety. Had this whole plan worked out where the site wouldn't have a domain name, users would connect through a 5-7 character "passkey" url (would have to point to the URL in their hosts file), the passkey would be checked against a database of accepted passkeys (tied to an account, as well) etc, so if the IP and any passkey got out, it'd be easy to have it redirect to google.com and the account banned.

...But, I still never went through with it.

 

[Cavallier]

I am content to break the rules that seem silly to me. Rules/laws are for people who don't want to think about morality and are comfortable with giving away control over their lives.

I hear there is nothing like breaking a law flamboyantly. Thus I think I would like to be an art thief or some such.

 

[Deleted member 1424]

Well I always found the idea of a phantom thief rather scintillating, but it doesn't do very well under scrutiny. If one is going to be a criminal, it's of utmost import that they be elusive, and nigh undetectable. While making the police look like incompetent idiots would certainly be entertaining, there's too much risk that goes with such flamboyant crimes. Perhaps a hacker collecting sensitive data for wikileaks, disabling government agencies, and exposing corporate crimes.

Or maybe I'd don a Guy Fawkes mask and become a V copycat, as he's all of the above with explosives attached. Although instead of targeting one Government specifically, I'd target religious institutions. I also like the idea of working through symbols.

Or from a more mad science angle, I'd develop a virus to randomly sterilize approximately half of the human population.

Of course none of this is really feasible.

 

[Unfall]

I'd probably wind up in some sort of radical terrorist group to topple the establishment............. Or a tax evader...............

 

[Dormouse]

As I personally am far too kind to go around murdering people, art thief sounds pretty appealing to me. Or cat-burglar. I collect things pretty obsessively as it is, so it ain't a stretch.

Or maybe I would just be a really stealthy graffiti-artist... I'd paint gigantic frescoes on factories and highways and places. Wouldn't it be cool to wake up and see your entire street has been spray-painted as a rainbow? Yeah. Dormouse strikes again.

 

[Minuend]

I thought of that, but after a friend of mine almost went to jail and had to take his site down (pretty well known site at the time, too, still really hasn't been replaced yet) I became super-paranoid and worried about safety. Had this whole plan worked out where the site wouldn't have a domain name, users would connect through a 5-7 character "passkey" url (would have to point to the URL in their hosts file), the passkey would be checked against a database of accepted passkeys (tied to an account, as well) etc, so if the IP and any passkey got out, it'd be easy to have it redirect to google.com and the account banned.

...But, I still never went through with it.

Even if you got caught, you'd become like a Nerd Hero (like Oblivious). Every geek would love you for supporting pirated goods. Your forum rep would sky rocket!!

Tho, hacker stalkers are something to be feared.

 

[nexion]

I am.

So I'd be myself.

Enjoy your fantasies, though.

You always have something interesting to say.

I am content to break the rules that seem silly to me. Rules/laws are for people who don't want to think about morality and are comfortable with giving away control over their lives.

I hear there is nothing like breaking a law flamboyantly. Thus I think I would like to be an art thief or some such.

Agreed entirely. Some laws I think are entirely hilarious, because I question whether someone really has so little morality that they need law to tell them not to do something (not necessarily that all laws are based in morality, of course...).

I would probably be an assassin. Or a hacker. Anything which involves doing massive amounts of damage and not being caught (not being caught if far greater than being caught and then being able to destroy anything, though it is not a skill I shun). I prefer the stealthy approaches to situations.

 

[Lobstrich]

Fucking pirate.
Seriously.

I'm with you on that one!

 

[Plumbata]

I'd pull off massive heists using explosives, thermite, and a range of unusual tools, but only after the easy-pickins were exhausted.

Imagine cutting through the roof of a small-town pharmacy, snaking an electromagnet on top of the locked cabinet full of controlled drugs, turning it on and hoisting the SOB out through the roof. Could make a killing selling the stuff to junkies, soccer-moms and college students.

It would be nice to orchestrate a series of smash-and-grab robberies of rich people who think it is a good idea to display their heirloom sterling silver tableware within sight of an exterior window...

Or when the discoverers of the Atocha treasure ship travel to schools with their gold and silver chains and ingots and hammered coinage, it would be nice to follow them, bust into the auditorium and steal it all since security is practically nonexistent (if memory serves).

It would be pretty sweet to excavate Indian burial mounds under the cover of darkness for the priceless antiquities interred within, (and native American skulls sell for 1,000+ on eBay so I'd grab some of them too).

 

[Marlene]

Assassin

 

[snafupants]

phantom jaywalking and tax evasion and possibly check fraud in the spirit of frank abagnale. only cowardly and/or petty crimes for me, thank you very much.

 

[nexion]

I'd pull off massive heists using explosives, thermite, and a range of unusual tools, but only after the easy-pickins were exhausted.

Imagine cutting through the roof of a small-town pharmacy, snaking an electromagnet on top of the locked cabinet full of controlled drugs, turning it on and hoisting the SOB out through the roof. Could make a killing selling the stuff to junkies, soccer-moms and college students.

It would be nice to orchestrate a series of smash-and-grab robberies of rich people who think it is a good idea to display their heirloom sterling silver tableware within sight of an exterior window...

Or when the discoverers of the Atocha treasure ship travel to schools with their gold and silver chains and ingots and hammered coinage, it would be nice to follow them, bust into the auditorium and steal it all since security is practically nonexistent (if memory serves).

It would be pretty sweet to excavate Indian burial mounds under the cover of darkness for the priceless antiquities interred within, (and native American skulls sell for 1,000+ on eBay so I'd grab some of them too).

Dude, you're awesome. Might want to invest in a few EMP's though just in case.

 

[nexion]

Of course none of this is really feasible.

I think the virus is feasible. It won't be long (if that day hasn't come already) when viruses (I already know it has been done on bacteria) can be fully constructed, from the DNA to the protein coat. All you have to do is have high clearance in a biological lab.

 

[DesertSmeagle]

ha. Id definitly be a hitman for some big corporation or the gavernment or something.

 

[bleepbloop]

I think I'd just be a dick in extreme and pointless ways (teroras):

- loads of plane and oil tanker bombings
- dye the water supply so it stains
- design obvious but important-seeming misinformation campaigns for media (so there'd be no narratives/credible info to mock or understand, which hopefully would upset lots of people)
- mandate that the last 0:46 of 'Hello Goodbye' by The Beatles be the only music allowed to be heard by anyone

 

[kantor1003]

Definitely a con artist. Why haven't this been mentioned yet?? It's really an art form and I have the utmost respect for people that do it well.

 

[GYX_Kid]

vigilante/assassin

 

[Dr. Freeman]

Politician.

 

[Abraxas]

An assassin similar to Mr. 47.

 

[Solitaire U.]

If I had to be one I'd strive to be the best, so whatever the law abiders would call the worst, I'd be that. I imagine that would be either a serial killer phantom drifter with some catchy hook like 'The Zodiac Killer' or a 20-something disgruntled male former college-student with sociopathic tendencies masquerading as strongly-held political convictions who blows up a random government building with a U-Haul truck/fertilizer bomb and then insists he wasn't aiming directly at the Day Care Center inside it.

Or maybe I'll be the Federal Electrocutor that throws the switch and watches those guys eyes pop out...

 

[Stoic Beverage]

I'd lead a small group of people who commit burglary and arson against specific people that I mark based on my mood.

Also, I'd grow me some pot. Shrooms, too.

 

[Jesse]

The rebel leader.

Viva revolution bitches

 

[BigApplePi]

Counterfeiter. I'd need assistants though. Any volunteers?

 

[descendant]

I want to be a bad guy with good intention
kinda like Kira from Death Note

 

[Solitaire U.]

I want to be a bad guy with good intention
kinda like Kira from Death Note

Or former LAPD chief Daryl Gates, but look what happened there. (Is it just me, or are manga-sourced conceptualizations devolving into cliche repetitions?)

 

[Cogwulf]

The type of criminal that doesn't caught. And it would either be a victimless crime, or a morally grey crime.

I'm not interested in crime for personal gain, unless I felt that I was a victim in some way and I was just righting things by committing a crime.

Victimless crimes could be considered things like hacking. If you steal information, the person you're stealing it from doesn't necessarily lose anything.

As for morally grey crimes, think of death note.

 

[socialexpat]

Good question ..
Hehe Descendant, you remind me of the con artist Schindler.
How criminal can be a criminal be, they all die in the end whatever their "profession" was.

 

[Solitaire U.]

Victimless crimes could be considered things like hacking. If you steal information, the person you're stealing it from doesn't necessarily lose anything.

Highly debatable, and Death Note is a shitty example because it's underlying message is a pretty straightforward allegorical play on 'Judgment Deceives'. Not to imply Death Note sucks, but it's been done, and in any case Light's motives, if he ever had any, have been corrupted into redundancy by his god-complex, like Bernard Goetz.

I get the symbolism and all that, but just sayin'...

Genuine bad guys with good intentions are hard to find. Even Robin Hood seems tainted by retribution. The Seven Samurai and Schindler are the closest examples that come to mind. Maybe the Terminator during the portion of the second film where he's complying with the kid's order not to use deadly force deserves honorable mention.

 

[Artsu Tharaz]

 

[GYX_Kid]

I want to be a bad guy with good intention
kinda like Kira from Death Note

heroic evil
using ryuk, "bored...lets give some bastard a heart attack...i dont give a shit about anything besides apples"

jason voorhees could be cool, although he did mutilate innocent people as well as sociopathic humiliator types.

 

[Reluctantly]

I don't think I have enough of an attachment to this world or people to have the energy to be anything other than an arms dealer. It seems like everything requires groups of people to rely on or to uphold your corrupt power, unless you become some type of mercenary or assassin in which case everything can be done alone. But an arms dealer...that's just a simple business where your power is mostly from your money and supplies...you supply the weapons and let the people choose what they do...if they decide to kill you in the process one day then so be it...but you get to see how things unfold and allow people to choose whether or not they want to take the most destructive and violent paths. You don't even need to make much profit from it - that wouldn't even be the point. Personally, it would be an exciting experiment and maybe even a barbaric indulgence in the primal natures of (wo)man.

 

[Lobstrich]

Even though I probably already answered on this one, I would be a good criminial. Like Che or Gordon Freeman! (Yes.. He is real) Though if they are good, is probably a subjective thing.

 

[Dr. Freeman]

I resent that! 6000 counts of self defence with an automatic weapon does not make you a criminal.

 

[Solitaire U.]

^ Certifiably lol-worthy ^

 

[Dr. Freeman]

How would that hold up in court?

Hmm...

 

[Yet]

[FONT=geneva,verdana,sans-serif]Into this wild abyss,
The womb of nature and perhaps her grave,
Of neither sea, nor shore, nor air, nor fire,
But all these in their pregnant causes mixed
Confusedly, and which thus must ever fight,
Unless the almighty maker them ordain
His dark materials to create more worlds,
Into this wild abyss the wary fiend
Stood on the brink of hell and looked a while,
Pondering his voyage...[/FONT]
[FONT=geneva,verdana,sans-serif]- John Milton, Paradise Lost, Book II[/FONT]


nâh not really ....

as fascinating as snakes are ... that's too pure of an evil & I'm all sugar and spice (yeah rrrrigth)

 

[aaaw]

A revolutionary.

 

[IzlaRoza]

I am content to break the rules that seem silly to me. Rules/laws are for people who don't want to think about morality and are comfortable with giving away control over their lives.

I totally have to agree. and i laugh while breaking tedious rules.

Politician.

LOL that is 1 that i considered while reading this thread.


But i would go for bombing something. lol im kind of a pyromaniac also i love loud sounds and chaos. and i would watch whatever i bombed as it burned and say "oooohhh pretty colors" lol Fire is so sexy.

 

[childish_intellect]

I'd be a vigilante.