What does it mean to be insulted?

[dark]

What is an insult?

I find it odd that other people get insulted. I am sure I do, but I cannot recall any instance in which I was actually insulted. It is not that I am arrogant, I just don't see things that way.

I admit I have lived long enough to learn when something is meant as an insult, but they don't affect me. I know I am not entirely cold and emotionless, quite a few females have shown me how human I am.

I'll leave this short. What are they supposed to accomplish for either subjects? I have been wondering this for a while, maybe I am missing some cognitive function, I may just have a distorted brain, who knows.

 

[SpaceYeti]

Hubris is the cause of offense. The delusion that what you think is so important that challenging it or the person who thinks it is a bad thing.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Maybe you just haven't been insulted badly enough.

 

[SpaceYeti]

I haven't been.

 

[Agapooka]

I am always curious why others form the opinions they happen to form. I always hope to find some form of solid logic behind it, and at least if it does not exist, I always hope to be able to correct it.

For me, feeling "insulted" happens when the above attempts to create mutual understanding fail, because I feel I wasted my time and effort clarifying what I believed to be a misunderstanding.

 

[EditorOne]

"For me, feeling "insulted" happens when the above attempts to create mutual understanding fail, because I feel I wasted my time and effort clarifying what I believed to be a misunderstanding."

Back up and redefine what an insult is coming from someone else directed at you. An insult is a deliberate giving of offense. It is quite often deployed because of its intrinsic value, that is, the person giving offense takes pleasure in doing so, mostly because they believe it demonstrates superiority to make other people upset.

If you don't get upset, good for you, you've robbed the insult of its innate value.

There comes a point, however, at which you might possibly have to respond just to 1. keep your respect among others who think those insulted are inadequate if they don't respond 2. stop being an intellectual punching bag for bullies. Sometimes you need to at least pretend you want to fit into the world of the Muggles.

What you are describing as "feeling insulted" because you've wasted your time might be more like indignation, might it not?

You might want to elaborate. There's no intrinsic value to being concise in here. We overthink and overwrite. The only thing we aren't over is overwrought.

 

[Agapooka]

You are correct in calling it indignation, but if this stands in contrast to "feeling insulted", then I am not aware of what is meant thereby. Once I become aware, however, that the intent is to effect particularly negative emotional reactions, I do not tend to continue reacting to the situation, except insofar as my curiosity can push me to want to know why. I find it difficult to dismiss things, because they usually continue to have value as an object of curiosity. I have an obsessive need to create clarity and I tend to operate on the assumption that such a thing does not exist mutually between two people if at least one of these persons intends to "insult" the other.

That said, any situation where clarity does not exist can potentially cause me to work towards creating it. As I see it, most conflicts between humans, regardless of banality, can ultimately be traced back either to a misunderstanding or to greed. (And greed, itself, can be understood as the result of a more universal kind of misunderstanding; however, this is somewhat speculative and outside the scope of this thread.) To base behaviour on a misunderstanding is completely irrational to me, which can be the source of immense frustration if I am not allowed the opportunity to clarify. It is in those cases that I lash back.

As for insults for the sake of insults, which, might I add, are oft poorly wielded and generic, they can effect no reaction from me - as long as I am aware of this intent. If I am not aware of this intent, I enter a clarity-seeking phase, sometimes in an attempt to discover if I might have offended the person's sensibilities in any way. At least, I will do this if I believe it might be useful to pursue peaceful interactions with this individual.

In other words, my reactions do tend to vary from context to context, but I cannot seem to identify one reaction that would be universally understood as "feeling insulted". Perhaps a more specific context can be explored?

Agapooka

 

[Yet]

I think feeling insulted has got to do with your values, estimates maybe? What you consider important. If others do not take you the way you want to be taken ... ay this sounds terribly wrong hahahaha

What I mean: I used to feel insulted if others underestimate me. The reason that that makes me feel insulted must have something to do with how I want to be seen.

Deep childhood drama lurking around the corner :smiley_emoticons_mr

Nowadays I do not really give a shit. Exept the opinion of people I respect en care for. They do not make me feel insulted but give me valuable feedback.

So I do think feeling insulted must also have something to do with how you value the person and with that opinion of the other.

 

[Agapooka]

Indeed. I don't believe that anyone is immune to the feeling (although I have not yet been able to define it in a manner that is satisfactory to EditorOne). It just seems that we experience it in a manner that is relative to that which we see as important.

From my above post, it is clear that I value clarity. I value it more from certain people than from others, of course, and so this will also influence my reaction.

If you were put in a situation where you truly wanted to be perceived in a favourable way, any threat to that ideal image would be unwelcome and might effect that reaction of "feeling insulted". Sometimes, what is valued is a sense of justice. In these circumstances, any situation that is perceived as unjust will elicit the aforementioned feeling.

Et cetera.

 

[EditorOne]

"although I have not yet been able to define it in a manner that is satisfactory to EditorOne). "

Just an aside: Not being satisfied with words and their arrangement goes with being "Editor." )

 

[socialexpat]

Let me hear some angles about Insulting and Guilting at the same time, seemingly those two aren't very far from each other .. Since i have been gone trough quite an odd period recently.
Where it often came down on the same few things .. If i count all the guiltings, blames, annoyances and what not together ... It must be that i'm worse than Hitler, Stalin, Qhadafi eventually that i'm worse than Satan himself so to speak.
While all in all, i don't even see the true meaning of it all aside from some joke or experiment.