The people I know where everyone else "I don't understand what goes on in his mind", seem to be almost exclusively men, and everyone seems to like them, to such an extent, that it would be accurate to say they have thousands of friends
Never met anyone who says they don't know what's going on in their head,
They understand what they mean. Almost no-one understands what they mean.
Also, I'm not saying anti social as in antisocial personality disorder. I'm just saying as in adverse to social situations.
Those people where everyone else said that "no-one else understands him", are people who consistenly avoid the limelight. But they seem to be people who are friendly to everyone.
Think of the sort of guy who never goes to a frat party in university, but who says hello to every one of the frat guys and everyone who went to that party every time he walks down the road and goes to college.
Those frat guys can't remember half of the women they slept with. But they remember him instantly, and probably will remember him for their entire lives.
So I can hardly say guys like that are "anti-social".
I've met people with Asperger's and autism like qualities, and they are happy to explain all this stuff to you, and socialize, and all that.
I'm just trying to say that there's a difference between being intensely interested in something, obsessed, and capacity for social engagement.
1) I can appreciate that. But these sorts of people are extremely intelligent. So they have the brains. Autistics show a marked inability to comprehend deceit.
They're not hired as salesmen and in business, because they're apt to mention the faults of a product that would put you off from buying them, because if you knew the truth, you would never buy that product.
They're also often not employed in many jobs, because if the boss' wife comes into the office and she says that he was working late the previous Friday, they're likely to say that was strange, because they were passing a restaurant that evening and saw their boss in the window having dinner with a woman who is definitely not the boss' wife.
In the same way, they're often not invited to parties, because when a good-looking guy is chatting up a young woman, they're apt to ask where his girlfriend is, and blow the guy's chances of cheating on his girlfriend.
2) So they're a liability in any situation where people want to lie, cheat and steal, and get away with it.
The real reason why they're considered to lacking in the capacity for social engagement, is because so much of social engagement is about deceit, and about lying, cheating, stealing, and doing all the sorts of things that are considered definitely immoral by everyone, and they have a knack of saying things that will stop people from being immoral.
So in a corrupt society where most people believe that to get what you want out of life, or even just to get what is fair, you have to lie, they stop those people from lying.
However, in a moral place where everyone wants to be upfront and honest, they are extremely welcome, because they say very intelligent things, and so usually contribute positively to the conversation.
3) Evolution:
Those same qualities that make them so unable to comprehend deceit, also mean that they are unable to be that deceitful themselves, even for their own benefit. So their traits are disadvantageous for them. So from an evolutuionary perspective, those traits should have become less and less common over time, until none of them were left, barring 1 in a million mutations.
I suspect that's why there are so many of them, and why evolution hasn't weeded them out. Any society in which autistics would be likely to be weeded out over time, is a corrupt society where people would lie, cheat and steal, screwing each other over all the time. In such a society, each person who gains, screws over 20 to 1,000 other people. So as a whole, that society becomes worse and worse off, until eventually there is no society anymore.
So any society that perceives autistics as having disadvantageous traits, such as a lack of capacity for social engagement, are are likely to disappear over time, is doomed anyway. It's just a matter of time until their society collapses.
The other societies, are the moral ones, and in those places, their honesty and intelligence would be of great benefit, and so their genes proliferate in moral societies.
4) Thus, overall, you are likely to find many people considered to be autistic, in any society that used to value honesty and intelligence, but now only cares about lying, cheating, stealing, etc. The fact that they are looked on negatively, means that that society is going to get worse and worse, as everyone tears each other apart, and is DOOMED.
Which countries now say they have a lot of "autistic" people?
Which countries are there lots of people who say that people are very selfish and dishonest?
Which countries are there lots of people who say that things were much better in the 1990s than today?
I think you'll see that there's a strong empirical correlation between them.