I don't hate them, I just didn't get my Dad who was an ISFJ with values that I did not understand. I suppose his Dad always made him feel like he was never good enough, and that was sort of the attitude he took with me even though I knew he loved me, my own interests were a complete contrast so there wasn't much in common to talk about.
Both were narcissists. Both left my sister and I to be raised mostly by my grandparents and they were not the best either. So,
yes, we had our needs met, but we had zero upbringing, I mean, everything we learned was self and world and not parental pretty much.
Yes, I do forgive them, I had to in 11th grade, just accept that I was my own parent more or less and pick myself up.
We always ate and were never hungry though, and I loved my lack of upbringing in some ways because I was really free to let life teach me everything and it did. And some how I'm fine anyway. I adapted fairly well, made it through college, parenting, working life. Just not as good in the human social skills as I probably should be.
She was a wild and fun and daring as hell partying Mother, either dancing until late, taking night classes or dating every night and she worked full time, so she was rarely home. When she was home, she sipped coffee and read the newspaper. She cooked once or twice in her life, it was usually baloney sandwiches with mustard, but grandparents cooked for us. Here is Mom with her boyfriend, who was constantly partying with his entire baseball team, lots of fun.
