Share your thoughts

[A22]

:I was writing this to myself but decided to post it, nvm though, just speaking out:

As previously stated, I'm in a new college, meeting new people, etc. Everyone's is really friendly and I think I should be happy about it. But I'm not. I'm getting paranoid again. And that leads me to depression.

I have a high level of self-understanding. I know myself. I can see what I'm going through and usually why I'm going through it. But I can't do anything to avoid it, it's just who I am.

Meeting people, hanging out with them, observing them and what they do. I keep thinking they're doing stuff behind my back. I try to convince myself that what I think is bullshit, but it's useless, I just know it. And that leads me to isolation and sadness - not to say depression. I get out of it out of the nowhere. It can be in a couple of hours or weeks.

Even when I'm not being paranoid, I can hardly relate or connect to these - or any - people. I can have long conversations with them, laugh with them, but it's all really just an act. It's just so empty to me, and it seems so meaningful for them.

Should I see a psychologist or something? I'm not like this all the time, I get like that from time to time. I keep almost everything to myself, and eventually let it out to anonymous / say it to myself, so yeah, just speaking out - or perhaps an unconscious call for help? lol dunno.

 

[T3CHD0M]

Over a decade later

We think a lot. Not everything fits for a whole thread, so why not throw them all in one place? What's on your mind or are you just bored? Share your thoughts with us or comment on them.

I'll start with a thought:

I don't have a steady income, in fact I don't know now how I will pay for this month bills next month. I presume this is the stage where a lot of people would panic, get depressed or become desperate. However, I feel very much at peace with it, I like it; the uncertainty. I feel as if I'm reading a good book and can't wait for the story to develop. Where will this take me? What will I do?

, but this is what I've been thinking of myself for decades. I had a bad car accident in 01 with a TBI and my brain/thoughts are far out of what I can control I think. It's hard to pay attention to single things and/or work. I saw a therapist or sumpin' and they gave me a med that made me feel just like I was on meth. I didn't sleep for two days and never took it again (which was just a couple months ago). I suffer from mental things, but wish I could just excel in life. I have a long story, but unless needed I'm not gonna sit here and type my lifelong story heh. But thanks again for introducing me to a place where maybe I can get more information on what I'm dealing with!!

 

[fractalwalrus]

Over a decade later

We think a lot. Not everything fits for a whole thread, so why not throw them all in one place? What's on your mind or are you just bored? Share your thoughts with us or comment on them.

I'll start with a thought:

I don't have a steady income, in fact I don't know now how I will pay for this month bills next month. I presume this is the stage where a lot of people would panic, get depressed or become desperate. However, I feel very much at peace with it, I like it; the uncertainty. I feel as if I'm reading a good book and can't wait for the story to develop. Where will this take me? What will I do?

, but this is what I've been thinking of myself for decades. I had a bad car accident in 01 with a TBI and my brain/thoughts are far out of what I can control I think. It's hard to pay attention to single things and/or work. I saw a therapist or sumpin' and they gave me a med that made me feel just like I was on meth. I didn't sleep for two days and never took it again (which was just a couple months ago). I suffer from mental things, but wish I could just excel in life. I have a long story, but unless needed I'm not gonna sit here and type my lifelong story heh. But thanks again for introducing me to a place where maybe I can get more information on what I'm dealing with!!

Check out Daniel Suelo's story online. He had a car crash and quit the rat race and decided to live a moneyless life. Many would argue he is an INTP, and he is a prolific writer with a blog that I still believe to be active.

 

[T3CHD0M]

Over a decade later

We think a lot. Not everything fits for a whole thread, so why not throw them all in one place? What's on your mind or are you just bored? Share your thoughts with us or comment on them.

I'll start with a thought:

I don't have a steady income, in fact I don't know now how I will pay for this month bills next month. I presume this is the stage where a lot of people would panic, get depressed or become desperate. However, I feel very much at peace with it, I like it; the uncertainty. I feel as if I'm reading a good book and can't wait for the story to develop. Where will this take me? What will I do?

, but this is what I've been thinking of myself for decades. I had a bad car accident in 01 with a TBI and my brain/thoughts are far out of what I can control I think. It's hard to pay attention to single things and/or work. I saw a therapist or sumpin' and they gave me a med that made me feel just like I was on meth. I didn't sleep for two days and never took it again (which was just a couple months ago). I suffer from mental things, but wish I could just excel in life. I have a long story, but unless needed I'm not gonna sit here and type my lifelong story heh. But thanks again for introducing me to a place where maybe I can get more information on what I'm dealing with!!

Check out Daniel Suelo's story online. He had a car crash and quit the rat race and decided to live a moneyless life. Many would argue he is an INTP, and he is a prolific writer with a blog

 

[T3CHD0M]

Thanks... :-)