Self Harm/Mutilation.

[TheScornedReflex]

What are your thoughts on it? Have you done it before or thought about doing it?

I was going to tell of me, but I have no desire to share my experiences further than I'm a cutter. At least not in a thread.

 

[Helvete]

I'v self harmed by accident before, but never on purpose. I never thought about it before it happened, only after.

 

[paradoxparadigm7]

Personally, I haven't done self harm but I think that it lies on a spectrum of general self destructive behaviors that we puny humans are susceptible to. I've had my share of self destructive things I've done such as starving myself, eating too much, excessive periods of drinking or drugging. Of course it only begets more self loathing and can create a vicious cycle. I almost always engage in those behaviors when I'm disillusioned, terribly disappointed, fear that my basic needs won't be met (didn't make enough money or overspent on something) or any number of things. I don't think the precipitating event really matters except the way I deal with it. If it works to ease the stress/pain, then I do more. The way I seem to break out of it is to allow it to run it's course where I reach a wall, come to my senses and make a turn around.

I've found the first step is to allow myself to relax about it. Place no judgements- disengage from the emotional beat-up for doing it. Confession is also really helpful. I talk to a few of my trusted friends. I've sought counseling in the past that has also helped but I don't find it necessary now. You might find it helpful if you haven't already.

 

[Jennywocky]

One reason why I made major changes to my life a few years back was because my continual depression and misery shifted into perpetual suicidal thoughts, and I started cutting along with experiencing other compulsions. If there are times now when I do get very depressed, I feel a strong temptation to cut.

 

[Lot]

Whipping your self with a leather belt for the win.

Feels good. But it's been awhile and I never did it hard enough to bleed. It was nice for my chronic pain before I start using cannabis.

Now only if I could find someone else to hit me with a leather belt

 

[TheScornedReflex]

I wouldn't say I'm depressed, but I'm not happy. I've found cutting to be quite addictive. There's a release to it. The pain sweeps everything aside leaving my mind clear. If I don't cut deep enough I have to cut again till I'm satisfied.

Having someone else cut you is amazing. Truly therapeutic and really hot. But I only have two people I allow to do that.

 

[Pyropyro]

The closest to cutting that I've been is when I accidentally cut my face with a razor while shaving.

Biologically speaking (I'm not knowledgeable enough to judge its psychological implications), it's a very unsound practice. You're opening wounds which might become infected.

 

[Cherry Cola]

not cutting.. but other compulsive acts of a harmful nature in order to calm down

 

[The Introvert]

As Lot mentioned, mild self-harm (whooping with a belt) can alleviate pain and stress without the residual long-lasting marks. I remember one time I had terrible sun burn, and the various creams and remedies weren't helping; naturally I took a switch and smacked my shoulders (the place of the burn), and the pain, at least briefly, subsided.

However, I would not recommend this procedure if one is feeling depressed or is in a tough spot emotionally. That would be cathartic for a different self-sustaining reason, and could result in some serious physical and mental scars. It's an interesting concept, though.

 

[QuickTwist]

The only self harm worth mentioning for me is when I punched a door because I felt such angst and was so distraught with painful emotion that I couldn't help bet do something to release it in an aggressive way. I still have a scar on my hand because of that action.

How do I feel about self harm? I think it is a destructive pattern that cannot be helped sometimes. When you are at the point where you are willing to hurt yourself because of negative emotion it is hard to get away from it and it can turn into an addiction.

 

[TheManBeyond]

I have been physcologically harmed on purpose, kinda like, i was pressuring someone to react really agressive (both physically and physcologically) towards me because i thought it could help me to stop doing something i didn't want to do.
Besides that not much more than punching a door or something like that and hurting my hand.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

At least cutting leaves better scars than burns. My left arm is fucked with scars and possibly nerve damage. There are some places I don't feel pain at all. But flesh heals.. To an extent.

I know a few cutters that obviously have a different opinion of self harm. Two of which are the ones I allow to cut me.

I've also been close to suicide. A few times I've been tempted to slice up my arms and watch the blood flow freely from my arteries til it all fades away. But I'm not that weak. And I've already died once. Not keen on repeating that experience. Or lack of since I don't remember it. (I was off my head).

 

[QuickTwist]

@TSR, you need to share your stories somewhere.

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Nah, my problems are my own. I refuse to heap them on someone else.

 

[Tristitian]

I knew a girl who self-harmed at one point in her life. When we knew each other, she came to me with her problems. Looking back, she almost certainly was going through some form of Borderline Personality Disorder.

Self harm is an interesting occurrence. There is no easily-obtainable reason to go through a process of self-destruction as an organism. That and suicide are equally illogical and equally interesting for these reasons. I wonder, how did this happen, evolution-wise? How did this trait originate? It's inherently against the tenets of life. Then again, it's almost always caused by mental illness, not rational thought.