Schmoozing

[Microtonalist]

I'm in a position right now in my job in which schmoozing and talking to potential funders is becoming increasingly part of my responsibilities. I'm sure I'm not the only one here who loathes doing that sort of thing. I do alright once we get on topic, because I'm passionate and knowledgeable about the work that we do and I love to talk about it. What's hard for me is the smalltalk, the chitchat and the pandering that needs to happen in order to get down to business.
I tend to dislike talking to salespeople and the sorts of people who ask me for money, and I especially hate it when they try to engage in pleasantries. However, I think most non-IxTx-types like that stuff - at least I'm told that they do, or that it as least socially necessary.
Anyone here have any tips on making pitches of this sort?

 

[Cherry Cola]

you need to play the part where you come off as the "weird but really smart dude who knows his shit"

sort of like when you work in an electronics store, it can be okay to be a total aspie there because the customers will think "wow this guy is such a social failure that the only reason they hired him must be because he is a fucking master of computer knowledge so I dont care about his quirks cause he'll get me what I need, I mean its always the inhibited weirdoes who know everything about computers and stuff"

of course depending on what you are pitching that may not be possible

 

[Anktark]

I usually skip the small talk/pleasantries altogether. Not to say I don't try to be nice, but I believe that one's sentences ought to have a meaning or goal.
I noticed some people that usually engage small talk with others skip it with me once we meet a couple times. I like those more than others, because it means we can skip the bullshit and get things done or have a meaningful (at least locally) dialog.

 

[Amagi82]

If schmoozing is part of your job description, start looking for a new job. If it isn't, either fail horribly at it, over and over until they stop expecting it of you, or be an adult and tell them flat out that that sort of behavior is a waste of your time and you won't do it, and they can either accept that and let you do real work, or they can find someone else who sucks to replace you.

 

[Vrecknidj]

You could always decide to take it on as a challenge. Study others. See which of the schmoozers seem to be most highly regarded by the others. Emulate those who are best at it, and try to become better at it than them.

I mean, if you turn it into a contest, it might give you an incentive.

 

[Architect]

Nearly all work involved this, in other words we always have a boss. I'm good at it, probably since I can use Ne/Fe to schmooze, but try to avoid when possible. Take it as a learning growth experience and you'll do fine.

 

[bemused]

Just immerse yourself in pop culture for a while and 'small talk' will become easy.

There was a time when I lived in an isolated bubble of computers, Nietzsche and obscure metal bands from Scandinavia. When I was in the real world I was oblivious. I had no clue what my peers were talking about or how to interact with them.

Once I opened my mind and started exploring the world outside of my own comfortable little niche, schmoozing became MUCH easier.

I am not saying devote your spare time to watching those insipid celebrity gossip shows, but if you scan gawker or slate or reddit or even the drudgereport, you'll be able to obtain glib knowledge of what's in vogue or what the 'hot topic' of the day is.

I try to arm myself with as much trivial and superficial knowledge as possible, just in case I’m ever in a dire social situation. Trapped in the room full of hipsters? My daily scans of Vice, Pitchfork, and my undying love and appreciation for underground music will save me.

In a room full of hardcore feminists? My glib knowledge of current events and the perusing of jezebel and other liberal blogs will help. Hell, I even familiarized myself with the 90s riot grrrl scene. (Most of the music sucked, but some of it rules). Lol

In a room full of working class proletariats? I went through a NFL and MMA phase. That could hold me off for a while.

etc etc etc. (all though if I’m ever stuck in a room full of religious fundamentalists, regardless of their religion, I am screwed - I’ll just stay muted. Haha.)

Master your craft but don't forget there is a bigger world out there. Knowledge, however shallow, can be extremely useful.