Problem & Solution

[BigApplePi]

There are too many problems in this world. We grow weary of all the suffering. We offer new solutions. The previous poster has presented a problem. Your task is to offer an irreverent solution but it must be simple: only one sentence or less.

Problem: Too many shootings
Solution: Remove triggers from guns

Problem: Too many drownings
Solution: Drain the lakes

Problem: Too many drugs
Solution: License drugstores

Problem: 30k auto deaths per year USA
Solution: Remove engines from cars

Problem: Too many old people dying
Solution: ???

 

[NoID10ts]

Problem: Too many old people dying
Solution: ???

Solution: Kill them before they get old.


Problem: Assisted suicide isn't legal, affordable, and available to all.
Solution: ???

 

[Marxbear]

Problem: Illiteracy in deprived neighborhoods.
Solution: Make words in books phonetic.

 

[joal0503]

Solution: Kill them before they get old.


Problem: Assisted suicide isn't legal, affordable, and available to all.
Solution: ???

hire casey anthony
problem: children are starving all around the globe

 

[BigApplePi]

hire casey anthony
problem: children are starving all around the globe

Solution: "Let them eat cake" - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_them_eat_cake

Problem: I keep procrastinating.

 

[Cognisant]

Solution: Stop procrastinating

It really is that simple, which is why it's so difficult for us.

Problem: <insert problem here>
Solution: Robots.

Problem: There aren't enough robots.

 

[RYZHKND]

Problem: There aren't enough robots.

"SOLUTION": "EUTHANIZE" MILLIONS OF "OBSOLETE" PERSONS, AND SUBHUMANS IN "GENERAL", SO THE WORLD RATIO OF ROBOTS TO HUMANS DECREASES.

"PROBLEM": H I V .

 

[BigApplePi]

"PROBLEM": H I V .

Solution: Spread pneumonia all around so you die from that first.

Problem: Robots aren't intelligent enough.

 

[Cheeseumpuffs]

Problem: Robots aren't intelligent enough.

Solution: Breed the human race optimizing for stupidity in order to make robots appear smarter by comparison.

Problem: My chair is really uncomfortable.

 

[PhoenixRising]

Solution: Breed the human race optimizing for stupidity in order to make robots appear smarter by comparison.

Problem: My chair is really uncomfortable.

Solution: Put cushions on your chair.

Problem: Society makes people into mindless zombies.

 

[BigApplePi]

Problem: Society makes people into mindless zombies.

Solution: Carefully place robot brains into the zombies.

Problem: Global warming is making this place too hot.

 

[joal0503]

Solution: Carefully place robot brains into the zombies.

Problem: Global warming is making this place too hot.

solution: destroy the muthafuckin sun
problem: strippers are overpaid and underworked

 

[TheScornedReflex]

Solution: pay them less pimp them hoes out more!
Problem: Pimps under payed and work to much.

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

problem: strippers are overpaid and underworked

Solution: After their dance, they REALLY need to go out into the audience and provide happy endings if not a blow job.

Problem: Some people are too happy while others are not happy enough.

Edit: Damn, I got ed

 

[BigApplePi]

Problem: Pimps under payed and work to much.

Solution: Switch jobs finding work for the homeless and take a vacation.

Problem: Some people are too happy while others are not happy enough.

Solution: Give some of their drugs to the ones who don't have them.

Problem: The Earth is coming to an end on December 21.

 

[joal0503]

Solution: Switch jobs finding work for the homeless and take a vacation.

Solution: Give some of their drugs to the ones who don't have them.
Problem: The Earth is coming to an end on December 21.

solution: create delorean time machine and prevent the big bang
problem: children cant drink alcohol

 

[BigApplePi]

problem: children cant drink alcohol

Solution: Let them be the designated driver.

Problem: We think too much.

 

[SinChroniCity]

Problem: We think too much.

Solution: We should smoke more weed.

Problem: Recreational use of cannabis is illegal in 48 of the 50 states.

 

[joal0503]

Solution: We should smoke more weed.

Problem: Recreational use of cannabis is illegal in 48 of the 50 states.

off topic commentary.

can anyone see the legalization movement being used against us in the future? sort of see it something like, "after years of study we can conclude cannabis smoke causes lung cancer, etc..." much alike the sort of demonization of tobacco?

smoking cannabis is a relatively NEW thing in the context of history...and im confident inhaling combusted plant matter does have negative long term effects down the road...main point being, dont smmmoke...vape or eat.

 

[BigApplePi]

off topic commentary.

can anyone see the legalization movement being used against us in the future? sort of see it something like, "after years of study we can conclude cannabis smoke causes lung cancer, etc..." much alike the sort of demonization of tobacco?

Yes. They actually passed a USA amendment to the Constitution making alcohol consumption illegal. Then they had to pass another amendment putting it back. Now we are stuck with the legal use of alcohol killing ~10k(?) people per year in auto accidents.[/quote]
Problem: Recreational use of cannabis is illegal in 48 of the 50 states.
Solution: Take those two states out of the Union.

Problem: What do we do with bad habits?

 

[SinChroniCity]

**off topic**

Yes. They actually passed a USA amendment to the Constitution making alcohol consumption illegal. Then they had to pass another amendment putting it back. Now we are stuck with the legal use of alcohol...

...because it was a disaster.

"Rather than reducing crime, Prohibition had transformed the cities into battlegrounds between opposing bootlegging gangs. In a study of over 30 major U.S cities during the prohibition years of 1920 and 1921, the number of crimes increased by 24%. Additionally, theft and burglaries increased by 9%, homicide by 12.7%, assaults and battery rose by 13%, drug addiction by 44.6% and police department costs rose by 11.4%."

Problem: Recreational use of cannabis is illegal in 48 of the 50 states.
Solution: Take those two states out of the Union.

I'm confused. You're not actually for the continued prohibition of cannabis? I've only heard people bring up Prohibition when arguing against it.

**on topic**

Problem: What do we do with bad habits?

Solution: Only 'we', as in our egos, have bad habits. Get rid of the ego and the 'bad' habits have to follow.

Problem: There's no way around the fact that you're going to die. .

 

[typus]

Solution: Abort your past self.

Problem: Sleeping is sometimes hard.

 

[BigApplePi]

Problem: Sleeping is sometimes hard.

Solution: Get yourself a soft mattres.

Problem: Roadkill doesn't agree with my palate.