nothingness

[DesertSmeagle]

Ever since i got off cymbalta months ago, ive felt as if there is no hope to live.

Now, and for the past few days, ive been in this weird state that feels like....nothing..Its really weird. It feels like my mind is just floating in space waiting to be acted upon by an outside force.. I still feel depressed as fuck and worried about school tommorow, but its kinda like..There is nothing to think about anymore. Im scared. Its kinda relaxing. I think my mind is sick about worrying about depression and shit. But now i feel like im in a state of nothingness.

I dont know what the purpose of this thread is. Give me something to think about. That doesnt involve history. Just wrote a big history paper. Maybe my mind has finally burned out, waiting to be re lit by some kind of pleasurable stimuli...i dont know.

Anyone else burn out there mind? ive been doing some really hard deep thinking lately. I should stop tryiong to make sense of society.

 

[snafupants]

interplay between epinephrine and norepinephrine? adrenal fatigue? your parasympathetic nervous system saying enough is enough? could these physiological mechanisms account for stress/depression seguing into relative calmness/depersonalization. some people possess sympathetic nervous systems which are leaning over the high dive (in fight or flight) unremittingly. worrying is so pointless though, a result of our primordial vestiges which have stubbornly refused to be slaked. modern living, as has been said before, does not require adrenal glands the size of basketballs thank you very much. instead, god, would you kindly increase the dimensions of our prefrontal cortexes? oh, please. whats that? did you folks hear a rumbling from the heavens?!?

 

[Gather_Wanderer]

Ever since i got off cymbalta months ago, ive felt as if there is no hope to live.

Now, and for the past few days, ive been in this weird state that feels like....nothing..Its really weird. It feels like my mind is just floating in space waiting to be acted upon by an outside force.. I still feel depressed as fuck and worried about school tommorow, but its kinda like..There is nothing to think about anymore. Im scared. Its kinda relaxing. I think my mind is sick about worrying about depression and shit. But now i feel like im in a state of nothingness.

I dont know what the purpose of this thread is. Give me something to think about. That doesnt involve history. Just wrote a big history paper. Maybe my mind has finally burned out, waiting to be re lit by some kind of pleasurable stimuli...i dont know.

Anyone else burn out there mind? ive been doing some really hard deep thinking lately. I should stop tryiong to make sense of society.

Nope, you'll be good in a not-too-distant moment from now. This happened to me just weeks ago, probably a few weeks before the semester started. I didn't even know why I was alive at that point.. I think possibly you just need to feed your external imagination. Go do something, somewhere, randomly; It's the only way for us to grow and it'll get you thinking creatively again.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Idk DesertSmeagle, I think you might be an INFP, or something. I don't really see any of the characteristics of an INTP. It could just be what you're going through though.

 

[The Gopher]

No it's just he can be outgoing when he is here?

 

[Cognisant]

I still feel depressed as fuck and worried about school tommorow, but its kinda like..There is nothing to think about anymore. Im scared. Its kinda relaxing.

I'm guessing you're failing one or more subjects at the moment and it's near the end of the year so you'll be getting your report card soonish, which makes this feeling one of "oh well, I'm screwed, no point worrying about what I can't change", yeah I've been there, many times, my advice is to enjoy your (I guessing) newfound appreciation of aesthetic beauty.

Go sit under a tree for awhile, watch a river/beach if you can.
All things pass, things are bad now but they’ll get better.

 

[DesertSmeagle]

No it's just he can be outgoing when he is here?

Ya thats pretty much it. Im around retards all day of everyday..that was a weird feeling. It lasted for about 15 minutes. Im definitely not an infp. I almost thought i was sociopathic at one point, but then i realized i really only felt guilt. I dont remember the last time i cried. Ive been looking online for some music or something to evoke some kind of emotion in me. Unsuccesful though. Ive been thinking alot lately and i think that somehow my brain just crashed for a few minutes..And today im sick as fuck so thats weird.

As for school. Right before that moment i had i was overloading my mind with shit. I had just written a history paper from information i had just read moments before, because i never read the book, and then i had an online psychology quiz, which was actually kind of relaxing. Ill probably get like a D on the paper, but its ok i guess.

I probably seem infp, but im a waaayy to logical to be one. I used to think i was infp, but i was living in denial and was biased. I then got real, and now i feel better about myself haha. I probably seem infp because of my depression and anxiey. ...isnt it werd how if you type intp and infp but accidently hit the O right next to the P you make words? info into...fuckin crazy...hmm been reading about infps and they are similar to intps except they arent really logical, and base things more on feeling. Its like an intp is the scientist and infps are the artists...oh ya im readin this thing and it seems that some infp characteristics are also symptoms from my social anxiety. At home around people i have no anxiety towards, i actually have fun making people feel bad and then telling them why they feel bad.

The reason my typing grammar sucks is because i used to play too much world of warcraft and this is how i typed for some reaons..Im slowly getting better...
Why do i use 1000 periods after every sentence?? maybe its a relfection of my type A personality and im hurrying through everything..i need to get back on cymbalta haa.

 

[DesertSmeagle]

Go sit under a tree for awhile, watch a river/beach if you can.
All things pass, things are bad now but they’ll get better.[/QUOTE]

I wish i had the patience to meditate..thatd be nice.

 

[Gather_Wanderer]

hmm been reading about infps and they are similar to intps except they arent really logical, and base things more on feeling. Its like an intp is the scientist and infps are the artists.

I wouldn't say so exactly: One of my best friends is a definitive INFP and he does more than well in situations that call for logical aptitude. The main difference I've noticed between us is his much greater willingness or want to help people, concern with how they're thinking and feeling. His emotional awareness is far greater and his support infrequently wanes, even when bringing himself into some of the most...or what would seem to be some of the most trivial situations.
Also, because he does have some skill in logic, he often makes too many assumptions or will grant himself complete understanding over a situation before properly analyzing. This has led to a few arguments in the past of me trying to balance an inconsistency in his thinking about something or about the correctness of a "fact"....He ended up walking out of my house once while we were playing some fighting game (I think it was Dragonball...) because he didn't want to concede a point about a specific date or timeline in the series. That was one of the funniest memories I have of the guy actually, because I absolutely knew him to be incorrect and he wouldn't take the time to go over his own thinking.

 

[Moocow]

I wish i had the patience to meditate..thatd be nice.

That's a pretty lame dismissal. "Oh I wish I could sit there and do nothing." Meditating is the best thing you can do for yourself in this situation to disprove your own assumed helplessness.

 

[DesertSmeagle]

That's a pretty lame dismissal. "Oh I wish I could sit there and do nothing." Meditating is the best thing you can do for yourself in this situation to disprove your own assumed helplessness.

Its not exactly doing nothing. Its actually hard for me because i cant quiet my mind. I try it and my mind creates rediculous amounts of itching, or I just cant stop thinking. This was one of the first times in many months that i was just sitting there not thinking. and it went away in 10 minutes.

 

[Cognisant]

Try falling asleep while sitting in a position you can't sleep in, for example sitting at a table and using your arm as a pillow, or sitting upright, if your brain works anything like mine you'll fall into a wakeful dream state, i.e. you're mind will be creative to the point of being absolutely nonsensical and you'll still be conscious of what you can hear going on around you, and sleep paralysis hasn't set in yet, but if you try to get up and walk around you'll either fall over or return to a completely wakeful state.

I wouldn't call this meditation as such, that's more of a state of really intense thinking without thinking, whereas this is a creativity exercise, because most of your thoughts while in this state will be incredibly random, like in a dream, but you'll have the ability to transition in and out at will to make notes on whatever your subconscious comes up with.

 

[Moocow]

Its not exactly doing nothing. Its actually hard for me because i cant quiet my mind. I try it and my mind creates rediculous amounts of itching, or I just cant stop thinking. This was one of the first times in many months that i was just sitting there not thinking. and it went away in 10 minutes.

So keep practicing.
I find it next to impossible to deliberately quiet my mind. The fastest way to do that is to maintain a focus on perceiving as much as possible. The more focused you are on observing, the less you will be thinking.

Otherwise if you can't quiet your mind, it's just as well to observe and accept your mind and its activity. The quietness comes after you learn to do that.

 

[DesertSmeagle]

Try falling asleep while sitting in a position you can't sleep in, for example sitting at a table and using your arm as a pillow, or sitting upright, if your brain works anything like mine you'll fall into a wakeful dream state, i.e. you're mind will be creative to the point of being absolutely nonsensical and you'll still be conscious of what you can hear going on around you, and sleep paralysis hasn't set in yet, but if you try to get up and walk around you'll either fall over or return to a completely wakeful state.

I wouldn't call this meditation as such, that's more of a state of really intense thinking without thinking, whereas this is a creativity exercise, because most of your thoughts while in this state will be incredibly random, like in a dream, but you'll have the ability to transition in and out at will to make notes on whatever your subconscious comes up with.

Wow, thats exactly what i expericene in sleep stage one. Ill get to the point where im almost asleep, and ill just start wakeflly dreaming about complete nonsense, but then ill forget about it when i come bacl to consciousness. And for some reason, when im in theis state, i can get trapped in it somehow, and i wont sleep until i become aware that im still awake. really strange...But im going to try to do this not in bed.