not sure where to go in life at this point

[kronos]

i can feel myself slowly falling out of my interests. schoolwork doesn't feel like something to be done anymore. i don't think i'm depressed because i don't feel sad, i just don't feel anything. it's not that bad anyway. i'm new to this forum, i haven't introduced myself yet. i go by kronos, i'm interested in playing bass, a little bit of coding, and reading. it's nice to meet you all. this is quite a messy post, haha.

 

[Hadoblado]

If you're disengaged, your wellbeing is low. It may not be depression, but I'd argue it doesn't matter what you think it is, it's still worth investigating.

I experienced both depression and anxiety in school, although at the time I only recognised the depression. One of the reasons these two issues are correlated is because apathy is a partial solution to anxiety, and depression has major overlap with apathy affirming beliefs, behaviours, and thoughts.

You don't have to worry about the fact that you haven't done your homework if you don't care about doing homework. You don't have to worry about not having done chores if you don't care about chores. Before long, your quality of life is lower, and the social expectation of all these things hang over you. You grow up and the expectations increase, but you find new ways to reject their prescription. All the while your brain is focusing on avoiding bad shit (that's kinda trivial) instead of on finding the good shit (which is life-affirming).

Depression is a feedback loop that occurs once you acclimate to a world you're on the run from. Reducing the concern of whether or not you are depressed right now is just another way to avoid addressing it (in my experience, your mileage may vary).

If you were to give me a choice between giving you a leg or going back to being depressed, I'd give you both legs so my wheelchair goes faster.

 

[EndogenousRebel]

Apathy is a natural response to a world that is seemingly indifferent to us in almost every aspect. You may not be depressed yet, but that path surely leads to depression.

I found writing my thoughts down via freewriting was a good way of me seeing the "map" around me, mentally and physically. Try reflecting and writing at least 500 words a day for a week or so, and by then you should have a good impression of the things in your life that influence/impact you. That will be your "map" and you take the path you think will address the deficiencies in your life, one that would be best for you. The story is about the journey, not the destination, happiness is a state of being not a place, never stop moving.

 

[sushi]

learn something that interest you or go work out

 

[BurnedOut]

Some questions to ask yourself
1) Does school bore you?
2) Do you have boring/less friends?
3) Are there too little expectations of you?
4) Have you planned your life ahead?

The key step is to identify the problems. Sometimes, simply identifying the problems lead to instant solutions or aha! moments.

 

[BurnedOut]

If you were to give me a choice between giving you a leg or going back to being depressed

Dr. House

 

[Black Rose]

i don't think i'm depressed because i don't feel sad, i just don't feel anything.

I experienced a lot of apathy after graduating from high school. I was asking myself a lot of questions about the meaning of life. Purpose. Value. but mostly in the context of the Tech Singularity did I find hope. I pretty much had no friends so I had very little to do. I was kinda lonely. And because of it I shutdown. In a way, it was a good thing because I did not feel shit about myself. I was neutrally numb and docile. It was like I was sedated all the time. Bt that was good because I had nothing to do. I could go at a slow pace. When every I started to do things fast I would crash.

Apathy was a coping mechanism I used because everything was too hard and I went for the simplest things to go slowly.

The one way I know to cure apathy is to become fast at some skill.
I find that being stimulated well relaxed is key.

 

[Creeping Death]

Amazingly stupid advice here, but start committing some non-violent/non-sexual crimes that earn you money, are alluring to you personally, and are considered at least somewhat respectable (among criminals and even others) and see how far you make it. If you get busted, keep your mouth shut and do your time. You'll meet a ton of interesting and unique characters locked up. Many are shady as fuck, but some are real solid guys. You'll feel a lot more accomplished in life, and won't have any regrets when you get out... assuming you don't do anything weird/sexual or over-the-top violent, then you'll get what you get. Have fun and make money, but don't traumatize or injure the innocent.

 

[Rook]

Burn down your home and wander the world. Might not cure your depression, but homeless sex is nice, and the stars are pretty at night. Drumfires are real cozy, and shitting on a cop cars? A bonus.

 

[ZenRaiden]

Amazingly stupid advice here, but start committing some non-violent/non-sexual crimes that earn you money, are alluring to you personally, and are considered at least somewhat respectable (among criminals and even others) and see how far you make it. If you get busted, keep your mouth shut and do your time. You'll meet a ton of interesting and unique characters locked up. Many are shady as fuck, but some are real solid guys. You'll feel a lot more accomplished in life, and won't have any regrets when you get out... assuming you don't do anything weird/sexual or over-the-top violent, then you'll get what you get. Have fun and make money, but don't traumatize or injure the innocent.

Holy shit what the fuck? I mean OK that might work, but not being invested in school does not have to always translate to criminal activity. Unless you think your parents or teachers are right. Way over the top response.

 

[ZenRaiden]

Burn down your home and wander the world. Might not cure your depression, but homeless sex is nice, and the stars are pretty at night. Drumfires are real cozy, and shitting on a cop cars? A bonus.

Reverse psychology 10 out of 10 lol

 

[ZenRaiden]

If you're disengaged, your wellbeing is low.

Agree.... though I am not sure what you mean by wellbeing. As if wellbeing has standard scale or relatable dimension in this day and age....

.... being disengaged is real issue. I think no one is fully engaged in school or every aspect of life. 99 percent of students do not like school. Most just adjust to the environment of schools, because they have to. Schools on the whole are not fun, but few outliers who are perfect fit for schools.
So rational approach to school is to find the most engaging aspects of school and enjoy those while devoting some time to address the problems of schools that are not fun.

However when you lose interest in stuff it usually means you lost the interest longer time ago. Just matter of habit we tend to notice these things lot later when they happen, because we usually still want to keep our usual lifestyle.

Its important to understand what changed in your life that made you disinterested in stuff. When it happened that you lost interest and see the clues mostly in form of feelings etc.

The solution is usually in changing your current life style. Sometimes even small adjustments can make a world of difference, but I think it takes a lot of work and time to figure out what really makes you interested.

 

[onesteptwostep]

Talk to people. Find someone to lean on.

 

[Hadoblado]

Wellbeing is measured all the time? It's just a fluffy self-report variable, although you can make the assessment from behaviour too. I think you're wildly exaggerating how many people dislike school. I've read 30-75% dislike it, but never 99%. I was depressed at school, but I also preferred it to home where less was going on - my attendance was quite strong even if I wasn't really partaking.

Anyway, engagement tends to be the result of wellbeing, and vice versa. People underestimate the holistic nature of mental health.

 

[Creeping Death]

Amazingly stupid advice here, but start committing some non-violent/non-sexual crimes that earn you money, are alluring to you personally, and are considered at least somewhat respectable (among criminals and even others) and see how far you make it. If you get busted, keep your mouth shut and do your time. You'll meet a ton of interesting and unique characters locked up. Many are shady as fuck, but some are real solid guys. You'll feel a lot more accomplished in life, and won't have any regrets when you get out... assuming you don't do anything weird/sexual or over-the-top violent, then you'll get what you get. Have fun and make money, but don't traumatize or injure the innocent.

Way over the top response.

That's just how I do.

 

[ZenRaiden]

I think you're wildly exaggerating how many people dislike school. I've read 30-75% dislike it, but never 99%.

I have talked to a lot of people and most prefer school for various reasons, over sitting at home and learning for example. Due to corona online learning is big now almost all round the world where it doable with internet access and so on....
I hear people often say that they cannot possibly learn a single thing without being in school, which I understand very well.

I also get that school for many people gives them at least some sense of accomplishment.

Extroverts Id guess would prefer school just for the people factor, being around ones peers etc.

By liking school I was more thinking of the actual learning that goes on being tested and learning new things and actually being engaged with the stuff.
Most students that I knew even in the advanced classes were more busy getting a passing grade or doing the minimum in class. The actual few people who were not only getting a passing grade, but actually loved the learning and loved the work done in class was very few. Even A + students who could take a pride in their competence and achievements were often expressing rather negative sentiments of school.

I think most people just get through the ordeal, because you just do not have better choice. So at some point it becomes just as more rational to adjust to the thing and do your school thing rather than complain.

I think the percentage I used can be taken as "Lots and lots of people hate it, probably more than is healthy..." Not claiming how many actually love school exactly.
However just like most people I did go through school and I just can't seem to figure out anyone person that would stand up as individual who loved school.

 

[onesteptwostep]

For my secondary education, I've been to around a dozen schools. That's 12 different schools, from elementary, middle to high school.

I don't think people should have an excuse.

 

[Siouxsie]

Apathy is never a good sign, haven´t we learned anything from Patrick Bateman?

Try to resume your interests, look for new ones. If necessary look for psychological help. Good luck!