Member stories, lets hear some

[lucky12]

So, I'd like to read some stories from y'all. Anything at all. I will post one for now, in person it always gets the best reactions. I will try to keep them short, I am a constant skimmer so maybe there are people who will appreciate it like me

Story #1: Uncomfortably numb

Me and 2 friends driving 7 hours to see a friend at a university. At around the 5 hour mark (its about 1AM at this point) the primary driver passes the wheel to my other friend, and me and driver smoke some reefer and pass out instantly. This friend who is driving is notoriously bad with directions, and even fails to listen to the GPS correctly! He ends up taking the wrong exit and we are heading straight for the border with no way of turning around. There is a bong in the car, and a baggy of course. Not too mention 2/3 ppl are pretty high lol.

I deem my friends very foolish in the presence of authority. I will tell other stories which prove my luck/skills in lying.

Of course, me and the driver had no idea of this catastrophe. WE ARE STILL ASLEEP. We were not woken up until being about 300ft from the border gate. So, the driver instantly freaks out and starts yammering. I just move things out of sight, best I can.
Roll up to the kiosk..
Border Cop "Blah blah blah, id's"
Primary driver (passenger seat) "Is there anyway we can turn around? We just took the wrong turn off."
The border cop pauses,"No, you will have to go through. Please show me your ids."

So 3/3 of us do not have passports of course, since we didn't anticipate needing them. They are required to pass, however there is a slight loophole which I have used before. This is another story. The border cop tells us to go inside to fill some forms up. Before leaving the car, I put the baggy in my pocket (its quite large).

Once inside, forms are filled out.
Border Cop, "Okay your good to go, just after I search the car."
15 minutes later, Border cop re-enters. Very angry expression, looking straight at the primary driver, "So you have a bong in the car and it smells like it was just used. Were you high while driving? blah blah. Where is the mj?"
PD, "We didn't smoke any."
All the border cops in the room chuckle.
Desk cop, "Okay then, come up here 1 by 1 and empty your pockets."
ME thought: FUCK its in my goddamn pocket.

So, I go up and empty everything but the bag. Slowly, carefully. Eye contact once I reach the desk.

Border cop, "You sure thats everything?" -- he only says this to me.
Me, "Yes."

Couple of seconds.. I just grab my shit off the desk and put it in my pocket. Like a boss, walk back and sit down. Me and him and now staring each other down. It lasted maybe a few seconds lol, thankfully. I was scared stiff in my mind hehe trying to keep as normal as possible.

From there on we were cool, they harassed the primary driver a bit cause he was obviously a little emotional at the time and they were playing along with it. The bong was "smashed". They took it easy on us .


So post your goddamn stories. The more your trigger certain points in my memory, the more I will post. Hope you liked my first.

-12

 

[The Gopher]

Ha I will have see if I can write up some of mine, why is it always us that gets everybody out of trouble?

 

[lucky12]

Well.. I have many cop stories, I will try to tell them sporadically .

This next one is a true classic. Much shorter as well

Story #2: Nobody likes a rat

During this story I am probably 18, and a friend of mine has had a baby (His name will be Todd). He's had problems at home, and etc. so I think hes just a bit sad and what not understandably. Me and my best friend drive out to see him since hes having some of his new friends over, and he wants us to just keep him company and what not. I didn't want to go, neither did my boy. I was a huge pot head at this point in my life.

So we show up.. theres his neighbor (Junior, barely any front teeth), his gf (THE RAT, no joke that was her nickname, shes big boned), and Junior's uncle (40 years old at least, looks like a trucker), the roomate, and us (Lucky and Billy).

Very strange combination of people. Very awkward atmosphere, almost tense. You know, the crisp air. I think I have fairly dominant xNTx traits, so I'm not much of a help. I start off the night sharing hot knives with the trucker, having a few beers and what not. The roommate is smoking salvia, and everyone else is getting wasted.

The area where Todd lives is extremely run down, poverty stricken, and has a somewhat bad reputation for domestic disputes. I am fairly cautious of people, as is Billy, so I have built myself a security net.

After "pre-drinking" the people would like to head to the neighborhood bar, which looks like something entirely out of a movie. Green walls, it has a smoky atmosphere. Busted up pool tables, the ceiling is starting to show its wear. Frosted light bulbs. A few locals, non-social types, all singing the worst karaoke. 2 beer taps, barely and hard alcohol. The bartender is uneasy, and she should be I'm underage (fake id). She hassles us all night, but who knows why.

The roommate and Junior bicker all night about who had it the roughest, their parents were alcoholics apparently and always dragged them to the bars as kids. Everyone played pool, all seems cool.

The alcohol and cigarettes take a toll on me, and time flies. Our crowd gets rowdy. The locals are insulting Junior and the roommate. The rat and Todd are having a smoke. Me and Billy just observing, waiting for a fight. Junior goes outside, hes had enough and the roommate can take care of himself.

All of a sudden Junior runs back inside yelling at me and Billy, not making any sense at all. He's telling me to get the fuck out of the bar, whatever. Grabs me, Billy pushes him off, and he runs back outside so we follow. The rat and Todd may as well have been balls deep.. His motives will never be clear, but Todd was allover Juniors big boned girl, the rat. Todd just keeps insulting Junior, telling him hes worthless, ugly, toothless, etc.

Long story short, Junior was the son of the superintendent in Todd's building. This fight led to serious break ins. Todd seemed like he was on his last lives in this time, he had put himself into this life by choice of actions. It seemed like he never did good, betraying his friends and fighting with his family for seemingly immature reasons. He had a life I envied, and still he tried to fuck me around once in awhile. I call him my friend because I didn't want to type "my sort of friend at the time".

Why did I mention this terrible story? Idk, gives some color to my identity on this forum.

Post some stories, your making me look extroverted , SENSING EVEN

-12

 

[lucky12]

POST SOME STORIES! This seems like the blog of Lucky12.

I just spent the weekend out on a lake covered in cottages. Never felt so poor and helpless. Lazy too, I wanted to work all weekend doing chores cause it was nice out and I enjoy spending times outdoors. I spent all weekend drinking beer in the sun with a bunch of hopeless old men.

More cop story high lights:

-Riding atv on road, evade cop, get cornered and give up. Threatened with 6000$ fine, get warning.
-Driving 8 ppl in 5 seater truck back from bar (not drinking).. see ride program, stop (dumb yea, but I was ready to flee lol) arouse suspicion from cops, get told to step out, lie flawlessly (he helped me lie), and leave unscathed.
-Stoned as hell, driving standard for my first time. Go through ride program terribly, putting along in the wrong gear up to the officer. CANT FIND THE WINDOW roller lol.. Hes shining the damn flashlight in my face, I'm freaking out .. I was young, so I was a little scared. Guy asks me if I was drunk and told him it was my first time driving standard lol he laughed and said have a good weekend.

Ive stupid little stories like this. If you guys don't reply it seems like I'm in a pissing match against myself. WRITE anything you fools.

 

[The Gopher]

Don't worry I will write something I am just in exam/assignment week.

 

[lenon01]

...Well, I have a friend of mine who is most likely an IxxP (she seems very NTish, but she is more emotional) and, on occasion, we'll take a walk through a mall together as we discuss things. A lot of the time, we end up talking about somewhat gruesome stuff (last time, it was which Egyptian God killed who and something about limbs and all that flying into the ocean). Every time we pass people, they all seem to get wide-eyed and freaky.

 

[boondockbabe]

OMG this is like reading my life. lol. I never could figure people out. I have bluffed my way out of more popo encounters than I can count. tomorrow I'll be bace to tell Y'all 'bout the time I got busted growin' pot. I DID NOT EVEN GET A TICKET AND THERE WERE TWENTY PLANTS READY TO HARVEST.

 

[lucky12]

@Lenon: Just feels great to freak people out once in awhile.
@Boony: I love cops, all the ones i have run into seemed to like me.

Anyone ever been in cadets/military?

I went for a 3 week course in Alberta with cadets. If you have gone through summer camps you probably know all about the shenanigans, especially in an all male barracks or similar.

The first night I got there I was taught how to break locks with a towel by my roommate, who also lectured me on guns and his favorite bullet grains and the like. I think his nickname was mommas boy. In our room we had 7. 1 guy had a mental condition and loved it when all 6 of us tried to pin him, mommas boy (used to spray his entire fuckin body in axe.. between his toes even), dildo, slacker steve, cpl.bitch? (i dont remember what we called him but his brother sounded like a woman), and some german from the prairies (coolest one).

One day im taking a shower and 2 guys bring in this kid wearing tighty whiteys.. They pick him up and hang him on a clothing hook on the wall and walk away.

Another funny moment.. we all put expensive kit and wallets out on our table to attract thieves. So genius.. we hid in all of our lockers and tied the door with a rope so we could pull it shut once we caught a thief. Took about 5 minutes, and we trapped the fucker and pinned him against the wall. No words were exchanged, just opened the door and let him go.

Lots of funny "one time at band camp" type stuff came up there..

 

[IfloatTHRUlife]

Yay cop stories.

One day 3 friends and i were out on a journey, we were in the most ghetto part of town looking for this apartment complex we had to drop my one friend off at so he could get us weed. We get there, we drop him off and sit there for a while waiting for him, we call him and he says he will be a little bit so we are like.. okay.. we will just ride and get a box of cigars and swing back through and pick him up.

We take off, find this little corner store not far from the apartments. My friend who was driving goes in and grabs the cigars. On the way into the store a homeless gentlemen sitting against the wall outside the store sat up and asked my friend for some change. So on the way out from getting the cigars my friend, being the upstanding citizen he is, gave the man all the change he got back from buying the cigars. Apparently a cop had been watching from down the street and stopped us before we could pull out of the little corner parking lot.

He parks the cruiser in front of us (in the middle of the road basically) gets out of the car and casually walks over to us with this look of satisfaction smeared across his face. None of us knew what the hell was going on. I was kind of freaked out because i had already got my own weed before we even came into town, it was in the glove box the whole time. Anyway he strolls on over to the driver side window, and with a big smile on his face he asks us if there is something he needs to know. We were all confused as hell so we all just kind of stared at him and shrugged. He cuts the silence by asking for ID from everyone, the only one who had ID in the car was my friend who was driving so he goes around the car writing down all of our names. he comes around to the passenger side and asks me my name.. now.... you have to understand, my name is spelled pretty awkwardly, both first and last. So i am sitting here trying to start with my first name and he kept cutting me off and asking me to spell my last name because apparently he thought he had spelled my first name correctly, which i knew he didnt so i persisted until he just let me correct him.

After that he goes back to the car to run our names, my friend turns to me and he is like "What the hell man, are you crazy? Trying to argue with a cop!"

A few minutes go by and the cop comes back to the car, all our names were cleared. He wasnt done though, he apparently thought that we were selling drugs and assumed that when my friend handed the bum the change that it was actually a drug transaction. He asked us all to step out of the car, patted us all down, cleared out our pockets and didnt find anything so he gave us all our stuff back.

After all this i figured we were in the clear so i proceeded to talk as much shit as humanly possible, i told him it was ridiculous that he pulled us over and wasted our time, accused of of selling drugs, and searched us, all because my friend was trying to be a good person. Told him he was probably profiling us just because we had a car full of white guys in what was obviously a black neighborhood. I made the cop write down his badge number for me and told him i was going to report what had happened to his supervisor.

I didnt report him of course, i just wanted to make him feel like shit. I wasnt going to go pushing my luck, i mean.. we had drugs in the car and were waiting for more drugs so i was just happy to get out of there without a shiny new set of bracelets.

 

[Puffy]

You told him you were going to report him? Gutsy

My Dad has a lot of stories like these from his youth, which he uses every chance to tell, but I don't really. I don't recall getting into trouble much and any drinking stories I have from the last few years aren't that special.

First thing that came to my head: towards the end of school 5 years ago me and two friends were on a hill, outside the school, chucking our coursework folders up in the air. Mostly because it was all done now and we were pretty pleased about it. However this one guy, who used to always want to impress us, came by with his coursework folder (which wasn't completed yet) and started chucking it up in the air to copy us. As soon as he did it a pretty harsh wind kicked up which blew it over the woods just far enough that we could see the folder open and spray his coursework all over the street next to the school. I found that pretty funny. Mostly because the guy was and still is a dick. Needless to say he had to re-write his coursework.

 

[Bird]

I've posted this elsewhere but whatever.


______________________________________

The finger tips of my left hand caressed at the black leather handle resting
in my right hand. The handle led up to a clear plastic covering which hung
above my head. The sun sat overhead like a giant yellow Skittle amidst a
sea of blue. The breeze brushed against the thin fabric of my lime-green
poncho, then flowed through the branches of trees, causing them to sway.
Some of the trees carried dried, lifeless leaves, which curled into brown balls.
Other trees contained no leaves at all.

In rubber rain boots, which mimicked the color of the sun, I stood, transfixed
on the horizon. A woman, jogging, passed by in front of me. In the periphery
of my vision, I noticed her jogging in place for a moment or two before moving
in reverse in front of my sight. “Why are you wearing rain boots?”

I blinked three times. Her jogging suit was Pepto-pink, and she carried an iPod
to match. Pulling out the bedazzled buds in her ears, she spoke again, “It doesn’t
rain here. Why do you own these useless boots?”

My mouth opened, then closed. Opened. Closed. Opened. Closed.

She continued to jog in front of me, and after swigging down a gulp of water from
her plastic bottle, she said, “Tell me why you own this ridiculous clothing. Goulashes?
Ponchos? Umbrellas?”

I opened my mouth, “Fish.”

“Fish?”

“It will rain fish.”

“It will not rain fish. It can’t rain fish. Fish live in the sea, not in the sky! It’s not
possible!"

My gaze drew up to the sun in the sky.

“Do you hear me? Put away your umbrella!”

My eyes fell to hers, “Then what will protect me from the fish?”

“There are no fish. Fish do not fall from the sky.”

I clenched at the umbrella, “The forecast called for fish.”

“Impossible. The forecast cannot call for a chance of fish.”

A cloud rolled in from the South, covering the ever present sun. In the darkened sky,
the horizon took the color of the deep ocean floor. The tree limbs curled into
themselves, and what I could only describe as the smell of salt water
filled the air. A rumble sounded from inside the overbearing cloud.

“What was that?” the woman asked, her jaw in a petrified state of openness.

“Thunder.”

“What is that?”

“It comes before rain.”

“That’s impossible. It doesn’t rain here.”

As I remained transfixed on the deep ocean horizon, my umbrella twitched as if something had hit it. The woman’s eyes grew into two crystal balls.

“Is that an anchovy?”

 

[Puffy]

+1 good stuff.

 

[lucky12]

@Bird: Pfft, fish falling is as likely as pigs flying.. preposterous.
@Ifloat: I love asking cops "why you do that".

In uni once... me and my boys are just liming in a hallway within residence and these 2 cops are running towards us. One grabs my friend and pushes him against the wall and for some reason i just yell at him "HEY what the hell do you think your doing? Get your hands off of him." The cop lets him go an apologizes! Apparently they got a call about guys "beating up" girls. True story is these girls stole this guys cellphone and held it ransom, I ran into the guys. They asked me about the phone, previously I had run into the girls (who I hated.. abercrombie and bitches) who were blabbing out loud about how they just snagged this dudes phone. So I told the dudes where to find them Nobody likes a snitch

 

[Solitaire U.]

@Ifloat: I love asking cops "why you do that".

What is the attraction for asking that which is guaranteed by protocol to get no response?

(*offensive graphic anomalies* Nobody likes a snitch *truncated for clarity*

The text preceding this is a rather gratuitous insult to it's fundamental principles. Hence, you may select ONE of the following as your preferred response:

"How witty!"

"How ironic."

 

[lucky12]

I prefer how ironic

 

[Melllvar]

I probably shouldn't tell these, but here are a few of my crazier stories from my drug-addled youth. I'm expecting readership of my posts to drop substantially after hearing this. In my defense, all of these happened 8-12 years ago.

Really Bad Mushroom Trip
Was about 16, hanging out with friends, most of us had tripped (mushrooms) before but it was going to be this one guy's first time. Being naive about dosage we gave him a whole bunch (because he kept wanting more), and the guy totally flipped out. I'm talking black-out, constant screaming nonsense at full volume, projectile vomit, struggling like a horse for 6-8 hours. We had to handcuff him, tie his legs together with a belt, and it still took six people to hold him down. FOR SIX HOURS. He ended up with nerve damage in both wrists from pulling on the handcuffs and slightly bad memories about it (he kind of blames us for it, can't really disagree too much, although we're all still good friends). Not that bad overall though. At the time I really thought he was dying. WE'D KILLED OUR FRIEND.

^incidentally, the proper treatment for this kind of thing is downers (valium, xanax, etc.) until the trip wears off. Obviously we didn't take him to a hospital because a) hospitals suck with tripping people (they tried to give this other guy a catheter) and b) we were all 16-17 and didn't want to get arrested. Note to parents: Please teach your kids responsible drug use, instead of indirectly encouraging situations like this.

Drunk-Fight-Crash-Hitchhiking
2) Went to visit this girl I went to high school with (just friends) at her college about 2 hours away from mine in the middle of nowhere. Get raging drunk, turn down this slut who's trying to get me to fuck her, piss off everyone else at the party (turning slut down really helped with that), get into fight, finally knock the guy down with a judo throw (osoto-gari variation specifically) and go running out of the house into the snow chased by a dozen or so frat boys.

Part 2: Out run frat boys, now piss drunk with a 2+ hour drive through the country back to my place. Get severely lost, stop by motel but they're full (or won't let me in, who knows), get more beer, get more drunk, crash car into snow ditch, try and dig it out with a stick (stupid), get picked up by some redneck who just walked out on his wife and kids a few hours ago. Good for me since it was freezing cold and I'd had to leave my coat when I fled the party (also I didn't even know which way to start walking). He does the two hour drive back to my place. Along the way asking, "Aren't you scared to be hitchhiking all by yourself?" My answer, still drunk as hell: "Nah, I've got this 8 inch knife on me. <show it to him>" Well, we didn't talk much for the rest of the drive after that... Highway patrol calls me and tells me where the car is a few days later. Pay some guy $40 to take me back out to it and call a tow truck.

^incidentally, DRUNK DRIVING IS RETARDED. DON'T DO IT. Even if you don't give a shit about your own life, you could kill someone else.

Mardi Gras on Cocaine
3) Got suspended from high school for three days for carrying a snowman inside and smashing it in the hall (I guess it's a safety hazard). Decided to go to Mardi Gras with some friends who had already graduated, since it was happening that week anyway (also went and told the principal who suspended me what I was doing instead ). Bought several 8-balls of coke and six or seven of us went down there (literally snorting coke the entire 10-15 hour drive) and... well, I can't even really remember, but it was definitely a fun time. I do remember almost getting arrested by a horse cop. As an example of just how much you can get away with there at that time of year, we were, at one point, just wandering around town without any pants on (why???), when my friend decides to high-five a cop. The cop just looks at him and says, "Put your pants on." My friend ignored him and walked off. Nothing was said of it.

Could post more (maybe more wholesome/non-drug-craziness ones too), but I think that's enough for now.

 

[Puffy]

I laughed at "cus I've got an 8 inch knife on me"

 

[lucky12]

Do we have any members/former members of Anonymous? I'd love to hear some stories from the front

 

[Dimensional Transition]

Well, since most of these stories revolve around altered states of minds... I will share my first experience with weed later some day, when I have the time. I've posted it here before, but not as detailed, I think. It's also the only story of my life that is interesting enough to tell probably haha.

I enjoy reading this thread though (: