Rebis
Blessed are the hearts that can bend
Naturally I'd wander from idea to idea, discussion x,y and z.
Last year I got into this state: Methodically keeping track of every 10 minutes I had, accounting for variables like cooking time, a 5 minute break, transportation and the likes. Over summer I reverted back to relaxing, playing video games and exploring the smallest of ideas.
I think I'm going back to being hyper-focused, almost one-dimensional. Does anyone go through these transitions? I don't mean compartmentalized hours of hyper-productivity, but genuine weeks and months of complete laser focus.
I'm glad I transition between these states, I do see a large personality change on my behalf. It's almost disassociative as I see the other side of me being ineffectual: If I'm exploring every idea in detail then there's too many tangents, if I'm not exploring tangents I'm becoming too narrow minded.
The change feels psychologically different from just concentrating, it feels like a complete personality change, I can't stress it enough.
I sometimes wonder if this is a disorder, or through the act of not accepting myself I constantly seek change. There was a story from one of jung's work, either the red book or relating to the self that always struck me, it was about a man that pushed himself beyond what anyone even anticipated about him, he climbed to the height of skyscrapers but then he climbed a mountain and at the top he died. I feel I'm becoming this person, it's a high risk high reward scenario and I'm taking all the risks.
Last year I got into this state: Methodically keeping track of every 10 minutes I had, accounting for variables like cooking time, a 5 minute break, transportation and the likes. Over summer I reverted back to relaxing, playing video games and exploring the smallest of ideas.
I think I'm going back to being hyper-focused, almost one-dimensional. Does anyone go through these transitions? I don't mean compartmentalized hours of hyper-productivity, but genuine weeks and months of complete laser focus.
I'm glad I transition between these states, I do see a large personality change on my behalf. It's almost disassociative as I see the other side of me being ineffectual: If I'm exploring every idea in detail then there's too many tangents, if I'm not exploring tangents I'm becoming too narrow minded.
The change feels psychologically different from just concentrating, it feels like a complete personality change, I can't stress it enough.
I sometimes wonder if this is a disorder, or through the act of not accepting myself I constantly seek change. There was a story from one of jung's work, either the red book or relating to the self that always struck me, it was about a man that pushed himself beyond what anyone even anticipated about him, he climbed to the height of skyscrapers but then he climbed a mountain and at the top he died. I feel I'm becoming this person, it's a high risk high reward scenario and I'm taking all the risks.