INTP and maturity

[grey matters]

Somewhere on this site someone mentioned that certain personality types take longer to mature. Does anyone have any additional information on this? I'm looking for websites and/or books on the subject.

 

[Decaf]

It depends on your definition of maturity. INTPs mature intellectually quite quickly, but quite slowly when it comes to social interactions. I have often been described as a mature person at job interviews, but only recently have a relationship of significance. I think it would be an interesting topic to discuss what maturity means (though in my head its synonymous with type development).

 

[grey matters]

it's too dark to read from a book I recently read that had something to do on the subject but i will write what I recall. From age 12 to 18 the personality, for example INTP, develops and becomes more evident As I recall this is called the dominant functions. from I think age 18 to age 40 the first auzilliory function, which is I believe in INTP'sfeeling develops and from age 40 to age 50 the second auxillory function which I believe in INTP's is sensing develops. Some people never develop their second auxillory function.
So My question is does an INTP's personality (the dominant functions that develop from age 12 to 18) develop slower then other personalities?

 

[Decaf]

Absolutely not. Most INTPs are well into their introverted thinking at that age. The perceived lack of maturity comes about as they haven't developed their mental blocks for their inferior function, which just happens to be a particularly visible one (extraverted feeling). At least that's my theory. I honestly don't believe the average INTP develops slowly.

 

[alierae]

My mom always told me that I was a mature person for my age as I was growing up. And now it is becoming more evident because I have a younger sister who is pretty average and is just like other girls her age.

Sometimes I do think that I am more mature than a lot of people my age and it is kind of troubling. I don't have many friends my age because I can't relate to them and I just don't enjoy their company as much as older teenagers or even adults. I am a senior in high school but I take college classes at a small college where I live. I love college so much because I can hang out with the people that I enjoy hanging out with.

Whether it has anything to do with being an INTP or not I have no idea, but I know that I have progressed through my years very quickly unlike others.

 

[ElectricWizard]

Sounds INTP-ish. Certainly, by most other definitions we're quite mature, and early.
Since we're talking in terms of inferior functions and such, come on, where would the world be without 'immature' INTPs?

 

[fullerene]

I was considered very mature when I was younger too. That gap held until I went to college, where there's a really heavy INTP/INTJ population. It's evened out quite a bit--surrounded by serious people who don't take themselves seriously at all. Perhaps this is home... but I daren't get too comfortable.

is our first auxiliary function feeling, like grey matters said? I thought it was intuition? I thought I read somewhere that our feeling hardly ever matures until well into middle age.

 

[Ermine]

I wouldn't say INTPs develop any slower than anyone else in their dominant functions. In relation to introverted thinking, I'm been called really smart too many times to count. Grown adults that I respect even go as far as calling me wise. I wouldn't say I'm wise at all, but I give off that impression, I guess.

The inferior function is another story. It can easily be summed up by the fact that I haven't had a boyfriend yet, and I'm 17. Most people my age have a lot more experience with that, and with experience comes maturity.

 

[ChaosTheory]

Personally, I'm very mature in my own head, but I'm not so mature when I'm with my friends, joking around. I like to laugh, and see others laugh, so we joke around, make perverted and funny inside jokes.

 

[Thread Killer]

I, too, was considered way more mature for my age by my elders. In my solitude, I always was the sort to ponder on matters that many would deem to heavy, I guess. However, amongst my peers, I either withdrew into myself completely or, as in my later school years, I began to open up to more people. However, I would hardly talk about myself and just involve myself in the joking albeit intellectual atmosphere of my friends. I felt I came off as someone I wasn't and knew if people knew what I was like alone that they would see a different person altogether. Though I was and am very serious, I try to keep that out of my social interaction and go with the flow and make witty comments here and there. Every now and then, though, I was granted some of those rare, honest and deep conversations where I felt a large weight lift off of me.

 

[Agent Intellect]

people may have perceived me as being mature. i was (and still am) a very quiet person, so i suppose people made judgements off of me, i just never opened my mouth to prove them right or wrong. compared to the other noisy children my age, my quiet reserved look may have looked more mature.

of course, anyone who hears me curse like a sailor and the kind of jokes i make with the people i work with would probably get a very different impression.

 

[fullerene]

However, amongst my peers, I either withdrew into myself completely or, as in my later school years, I began to open up to more people. However, I would hardly talk about myself and just involve myself in the joking albeit intellectual atmosphere of my friends. I felt I came off as someone I wasn't and knew if people knew what I was like alone that they would see a different person altogether. Though I was and am very serious, I try to keep that out of my social interaction and go with the flow and make witty comments here and there. Every now and then, though, I was granted some of those rare, honest and deep conversations where I felt a large weight lift off of me.

As someone else who could have written that word for word about themselves (except that I thought the idea of acting like two people was too hypocritical for me, so I only acted like that when I could justify it in my head by saying "the conversation never turned towards anything I was serious about), I feel obligated to say be careful!! It's a nasty time if you pick the wrong people to talk to.

 

[grey matters]

I made an error in my second post, I refered to the thinking and sensing functions as auxillirary functions. I haven't had electricity since hurricane Ike tangled up the power lines behind my subdivision and I didn't refer to the book when I made that post. I apologise. Here is what I should have posted. Acording to the book "Do What You Are" by Paul d. Tieger and Barbara Barron there are 4 functions involved with the type development of an INTP, they are:

1 (dominant) thinking
2 (auxiliary) intuition
3 (tertiary) sensing
4 (inferior) feeling

these 4 functions don't develop simultaneously. We are born with our 4 letter personality but they don't really become evident to other people until ages 6-12. Without constraints, children will always naturally start to strengthen their dominant function (during this period of their lives. Our dominant function is the driving force behind our personalities and the source of our natural strengths.

From agout the age of twelve, we start to strengthen our auxiliary function (intuition in an INTP)). The auxiliary fuction balances the dominant function and ensures that we are proficient at both informatiion gathering and decision making. Once the dominant and auxiliary functions are firmly established the third and forth functions fall into line (although they are still quite undeveloped). By the age of about 25 our personality types are distinct.

This is where my question lay. Does it take longer to develop into an INTP then other personality types?

The book goes on to mention that from age 25 to age 50 we start to develop our third fnction (sensing in an INTP) and after age 50 we may start to use our 4th function (feeling in an INTP) with more success.

The book suggests that type development can be effected by nurture. I.e. if you are the only INTP in a family of SF's they might, through ignorance, discourage our NT behaviors-try to change us. the nurture part of this argument is easy to see and some of us may have experienced some of this. I am wondering if nature efects type development.

By the way, the book mentions that If a child is discouraged from using his or her dominant function he or she may grow up not trusting the most central part of his or her personality. This obviously interferes with having a fufilling life. Could this be a possible reason why some INTP's seem to be so screwed up? Oh and for the paranoid people out there, no, this "discouraging behavior" on the part of the other personalities is not a devious plot invented to screw with us. I believe it is more a human nature thing, you know narcisicism and common misunderstanding.

 

[Oblivious]

GM's post brings up many questions for me.

1. What would a hypothetical INTP or an NT dominated world be like towards a hypothetical minority SF?
1.1 Would they encourage the "deviant" SF children or would they strive to put them in line?
1.2 How many cures for cancer would we have?

2. What about our world has created the huge imbalance between SJ and NT types? Forum whining?
2.1 How has the demographic been changing if it has?
2.2.1 What are the cultural factors responsible for this change?
2.2.2 How has technology contributed? INTPs seem to appear in higher concentrations online than in real life, predictably.

And now the million dollar question.

3. If I wanted to to build an orbital personality changing beam how would I go about it?

 

[Taylored]

Grown adults that I respect even go as far as calling me wise.

I get the same thing. Usually from people I have little respect for.

I believe INTPs tend to give off a level of maturity in our teen and twenties because of our quiet confidence.
We usually get one of two responses. The first being, "this person is stuck up.", this usually comes from our peers. The second being, "this person is mature/wise."

This is what I have run into, anyway.

 

[Agent Intellect]

I get the same thing. Usually from people I have little respect for.

I believe INTPs tend to give off a level of maturity in our teen and twenties because of our quiet confidence.
We usually get one of two responses. The first being, "this person is stuck up.", this usually comes from our peers. The second being, "this person is mature/wise."

This is what I have run into, anyway.

i usually got the first response during my school years. i went to a school where extraversion was very dominant, and guys being impetuous, domineering, and rude was considered "grown up" (the idea of doing what you want, when you want, how you want, and not taking shit from anyone) so to be quiet, reserved, and seemingly passive was tantamount to being weak and childish in the eyes of my peers.

 

[grey matters]

To adults I seemed mature. Perhaps this is because I could carry on a conversation with them. To my peers in high school I think I appeared immature because I was not infatuated with the "important" things like boys, clothes, and interpersonal relationships.

For whatever reason I have always been drawn to older people. Even today I prefer their company. Does anybody else feel this way?

 

[fullerene]

not me... I would have thought I would, but adult conversations (at least the ones I've been around) are every bit as shallow and meaningless as kids'--and often a great deal more so. Just different kinds of meaningless... talking about careers and their relatives mostly. Any ideological conversations are almost strictly taken from whatever's being talked about in the news... often with little "new" perspective or argument. At least, that's what I've seen.

 

[Agent Intellect]

not me... I would have thought I would, but adult conversations (at least the ones I've been around) are every bit as shallow and meaningless as kids'--and often a great deal more so. Just different kinds of meaningless... talking about careers and their relatives mostly. Any ideological conversations are almost strictly taken from whatever's being talked about in the news... often with little "new" perspective or argument. At least, that's what I've seen.

i agree. i find that grown up banter to be quite dry and hackneyed. i've always been able to have relatively meaningful conversations with my dad (INTJ) but pretty much all my other older relatives its the weather, or gas prices, or sports, or what so-and-so is up to, and they wonder why i only see them about 3 times a year. because its the same damn conversation everytime i see them.

 

[eudemonia]

Have you ever wondered if they are as frustrated with the same conversation as you are? Maybe we are all enslaved by convention. Maybe we all long to connect at a deeper level. It's just that we have lost the art.

Then after years of trying and somehow missing it, we lose the will. And something dies in us. So we just go through the motions. Everyone is just going through the motions.

 

[loveofreason]

I can see the truth in that, but it's almost as if connecting on a deep level has become taboo. What are we hoping to preserve with our dry and boring conversations? What feels under threat?

But to grey matter's comment - I actually did get along better with my elders than my peers - my elders were sources of information on topics that I wanted to study. I extracted every bit I could. I questioned them mercilessly. I actually found some teachers with a real interest in what they taught.

In hindsight I was a sometimes aggressive sponge.

Socially though I was handicapped. Unless I was learning something I was at a loss. My peers had nothing to offer but derision.

 

[Agent Intellect]

Have you ever wondered if they are as frustrated with the same conversation as you are? Maybe we are all enslaved by convention. Maybe we all long to connect at a deeper level. It's just that we have lost the art.

Then after years of trying and somehow missing it, we lose the will. And something dies in us. So we just go through the motions. Everyone is just going through the motions.

interesting theory, and i'm sure its true for some people, but i've never been shy about hiding my interest in, what i'd call, more interesting topics. the problem with that is, people either have little or no understanding of what i'm talking about, or little or no interest in pursuing the conversation. people have told me straight up when i bring something up that they really couldn't care less. that and a lot of things i enjoy discussing, or debating (philosophy and religion) offend people for some reason (which is one reason i like this forum, people don't take things personally) so its not even worth it to try (and that seems to be an even bigger trend among older people).

 

[Dan Eaze]

people have told me straight up when i bring something up that they really couldn't care less. that and a lot of things i enjoy discussing, or debating (philosophy and religion) offend people for some reason (which is one reason i like this forum, people don't take things personally) so its not even worth it to try (and that seems to be an even bigger trend among older people).

I know that kind of conversation. Mostly, if i dont care much about the topic, i thought nothing about such comments. Sometimes, and of course due repeated "I dont care"-replys from others, i found my self forced to think it must be the subject i was introducing wich is boring, or me.

I think, you can not talk to non-INTPs about religion. You can try, but: Religion is not based on logic. If you attack religion with INTP standard logical approach, you choose a waepon wich is unfamiliar to most humans (little bit to hard, but true): Logic isnt the most commonly used "tool" in social interactions, and if you use it against someone less familiar with it, you dont need to wonder why he chooses irrational "F" as a tool to offend.