ham candle's guide for social success

[ham candle]

1. learn to love that detestable slob staring back at you in the mirror

2. get out there, give it a try. try it again

3. analyze the results of 1., see if there's anything you could improve. be 'kind but honest' to yourself during this analysis. be creative in your solutions, try to think long term

4. discover the things you love in the process of 1. and 2., and pursue them. if you don't want something, don't bother. try not to be a jerk about 'not bothering'

5. remember to 'water your plants', that is, to maintain the relationships you enjoy

6. remember to 'prune your plants', as in, to move quietly away from relationships you don't enjoy

7. don't worry about being inadequate in any way beyond what you can control in 3., there is a place for everyone

 

[sammael]

Lol. Whats your definition of social success bud..?

 

[ham candle]

Lol. Whats your definition of social success bud..?

Forming and maintaining the type of relationships you want.

 

[Linsejko]

This one sounds too much like all the self-help books that I don't really trust. :\

 

[ham candle]

This one sounds too much like all the self-help books that I don't really trust. :\

I blame the inadequacies of 'list-based ethics'. Oh well, tried my best.

Maybe next time I'll try some object-oriented ethics, like PUA. In the meantime, perhaps you should hazard your own list.

 

[Lobstrich]

I give Cam Handle props for trying to do something that another person did, but was met with immense resistance to. And for having an open minded opinion on what "social success" is. I agree with it... I think.

 

[scorpiomover]

Interesting. I actually found it quite enlightening.

 

[ham candle]

I declare this thread to be an unmitigated success.

 

[Dimensional Transition]

Yeah, it's a pretty good 'guide'. To-the-point.