do you look different than you think you do?

[brain enclosed in flesh]

This happens to me often: I'll see a picture of me or video and I can't believe that it's what I look like- it just seems wrong. Also, whenever I look in the mirror the first split second surprises me- Really? That's what I really look like?

Does this happen to anyone else? If so, how do you look different than you think you do? Or do you think of yourself as looking like anything?

For me I think it might surprise me that I'm actually in a body sometimes, that I actually have a distinctive look. Also, I think my eyes are bigger, more buggy than I think and I look more ethnic than I think- very Mediterranean.

 

[Red Mage]

Yes, yes, and a thousand times yes. I try not to look at myself, but when I do I get even sadder because it's not what I pictured. It's like chatting with someone online and getting a visual impression in your head and then seeing a picture and they're totally not what you pictured; or when you hear your voice recorded and you think wtf. It gets me literally every time. And I want the creator of my webcam to die a horrible death.

 

[Anthile]

I second that, Red Mage. Everything.

 

[Jennywocky]

Actually, it's sort of the opposite for me: I always think I look a lot worse than I actually do, although I still look at myself a lot just to make sure I'm "okay." I am constantly surprised that I don't look as bad as I imagine myself. Still there are some photos where I feel my face looks much fatter/rounder than I thought it was.

The voice difference is because you hear your voice not just through the air but through the bones of your skull/head (those vibrations are passed off to your hearing mechanism), whereas others (and recorders) only hear your voice through the air. I hated my voice a lot when I first heard it, but now I'm used to it.

I wonder what our residual images are, a la Matrix? They had what they looked like in reality, versus the image their minds were holding of themselves...

 

[Ulysses]

Everyone's face is asymmetrical to some extent. When you look in the mirror everyday, you see a reversed image of yourself and grow accustomed to this asymmetry. When you see a photo of yourself taken with a camera, your facial imperfections suddenly become more noticeable since the image hasn't been reversed.

Try taking an photo of yourself looking straight at the camera, then duplicate one half of your face and then flip it along a vertical axis to create a perfectly symmetrical face. Also, try looking at a family member (or someone else you see every day) through a mirror and see what happens.

 

[Ermine]

YES. Pictures of me taken by other people always end up looking different from my perception of myself. They always see something in me that I don't see in myself and vice versa. All the more reasons for me to be more objective. And half the time, I don't even feel like I'm physically present, like it's just my eyes and brain hovering 5 feet above the floor. That doesn't help in my self perception either.

According to me, I have dark blond hair, deep set eyes, bigger lips, and really pale skin.
According to anyone else, I look more bubbly than I imagine, lighter blond hair, and not quite as pale as I thought. It's not the looks that change as much as it is the personality behind the face.

 

[snowqueen]

100% all the time.

I think I look like this:

But actually I look like this:


http://personalitycafe.com/members/...s-domain-picture637-snowqueen-looking-you.jpg

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

I hate looking at pictures of myself or in the mirror. I look like a big dumb lummox and sometimes get treated as if I am one by people who don't know me. Even the glasses don't help. While I like seeing myself as big, the blank looking stare and awkward posture is enough to offend myself.

 

[cheese]

I third Red Mage. It used to shock me horribly. Now it just makes me suicidal.

 

[Seducer of the Homeless]

i hate looking at myself, i always look worse in photographs. i look cooler in the mirror.

i also look better as the day goes on, in morning i look rubbish and look my best around 11

 

[Ermine]

Yes, yes, and a thousand times yes. I try not to look at myself, but when I do I get even sadder because it's not what I pictured. It's like chatting with someone online and getting a visual impression in your head and then seeing a picture and they're totally not what you pictured; or when you hear your voice recorded and you think wtf. It gets me literally every time. And I want the creator of my webcam to die a horrible death.

Hmm. That's actually the reason why I'm compelled to look at myself in mirrors a lot, in order to overcome that and merge my mental image of myself with my actual image.

 

[brain enclosed in flesh]

Hmm. That's actually the reason why I'm compelled to look at myself in mirrors a lot, in order to overcome that and merge my mental image of myself with my actual image.

I do this, too. But it still surprises me every time. Interesting to see how much this post resonates. You know, other people say I look different depending on the photograph, too. Even my husband. And I think I change often irl as well- like my face changes shape, like my physical body isn't fixed or something. Weird.

I think I still expect to look like I did when I was three. Although I probably thought the same thing when I was three.

 

[Jesin]

Yes, yes, and a thousand times yes. I try not to look at myself, but when I do I get even sadder because it's not what I pictured. It's like chatting with someone online and getting a visual impression in your head and then seeing a picture and they're totally not what you pictured; or when you hear your voice recorded and you think wtf. It gets me literally every time. And I want the creator of my webcam to die a horrible death.

Hmm. That's actually the reason why I'm compelled to look at myself in mirrors a lot, in order to overcome that and merge my mental image of myself with my actual image.

Yes, this sort of thing happens to me, too. (Not every time, but a lot, I think.)

 

[Enne]

I always look CHUBBIER.

Also, light can have an odd effect on my skin tone. I can look anything from mocha to light bronze to caramel. My school ID, prom pictures, and normal pictures look like 3 different people. Most of the time I think I look OK, though.

 

[Reverse Transcriptase]

There was a philosophy professor... I didnt have him, but a friend did... who told his students to get a full sized mirror and just sit infront of it naked, and think about what thoughts go through your head. Since we cover ourselves up so often... and even when we look at ourselves we only look at our faces... people dont really feel comfortable or at home in their own skin. Its kinda unfortunate.

I talked about this mind-experiment before, but its been helpful for me so Ill keep repeating

(Ive missed zou so much INTPforum, im on a trip and have been awaz from internet for the most part.)

 

[Kuu]

Still there are some photos where I feel my face looks much fatter/rounder than I thought it was.

i hate looking at myself, i always look worse in photographs. i look cooler in the mirror.

You know, other people say I look different depending on the photograph, too. Even my husband. And I think I change often irl as well- like my face changes shape, like my physical body isn't fixed or something.

You are not insane (not that insane, at least). This is completely natural. It's called perspective distortion. A wide focal length (like most pocket consumer cameras have) distorts you as it increases apparent depth, and a very long focal length (big zoom) flattens depth. This is why there is a mid range of focal lengths that is considered "ideal" for portraits, as they result in minimal deviation from what a human naturally perceives. And why most portable cameras produce shitty portraits.

Adding flash only worsens things.... (straight-ahead on-camera flash is perhaps the worst thing to ever happen to humanity).

As well as attempting to "pose" introverts. We will inevitable look like we're dead. For a natural looking portrait we need to be oblivious of the camera. Extraverts seem to be able to adopt more loose postures much easily... the bastards.

I personally hate other people taking photographs of me because of said reasons. But self portraits look good, and some photos from select individuals also turn out okay (because they actually know what they're doing).


In other words: If you look hideous, it usually is the photographer's fault . Except for Melkor, he is hideous.


Re. existential "I don't look like I feel I should"... yeah I get that too.

 

[Ulysses]

You are not insane (not that insane, at least). This is completely natural. It's called perspective distortion. A wide focal length (like most pocket consumer cameras have) distorts you as it increases apparent depth, and a very long focal length (big zoom) flattens depth. This is why there is a mid range of focal lengths that is considered "ideal" for portraits, as they result in minimal deviation from what a human naturally perceives. And why most portable cameras produce shitty portraits.

The amount of distortion depends on the distance between the lens and the subject. With most consumer cameras, that distortion is virtually negligible at around 4-5 meters.

I stand by what I said earlier.

 

[Kuu]

Yeah. That distance thing is true. But most photos taken with those cameras are not taken from 4 or 5 meters distance! Usually its between arms length to 3 meters... Specially when indoors...




And I wasn't countering your asymmetry claim, btw. That is also true. I don't know where you thought that I was addressing you at all...

 

[Beat Mango]

I think I'm one of those people who looks completely different from the side as they do from the front. Those people freak me out.

 

[drumir93]

I don't dislike the way I look, I'm just sometimes shocked that I look anything at all. Even if they annoy me, I still care for people. I just never actually considered myself to be one. I've always been the observer and not the participant and therefore sometimes find it a setback that my face can even be seen.
You know, like when you stare at people and they realise it before you do.I think thats related to me not showing emotion on my face, but thats a whole other topic.

 

[Artifice Orisit]

View attachment 649
Sure it's not my ideal choice, but I can live with it.

 

[Seducer of the Homeless]

i think i look like a Rat and others say i look cute...?!

other people are strange

 

[Ulysses]

Some people think Rats are cute. ;P

 

[Seducer of the Homeless]

hahaha....

lol

maybe....

 

[echoplex]

Depending on my hair, and the light, and my mood, and the time of day, and how recently I've shaven, and about 200 other random factors, I can look anywhere from damned handsome (if I may say so myself), to a hideous abominable cellerdwelling creature sent from the mutants to scare the hell out of children and pets.

Why would a creature be sent to do such a thing? For pleasure? For science? I don't know...

So I've given up on thinking anything about how I look since it is so unpredictable. I look awesome though, all jokes aside.

 

[LucasM]

I just never think about how I look until it is brought up, then I am surprised.

 

[Citizen X]

Many people have told me I look like Ted Bundy. For those who do not know, Ted Bundy was a serial killer who operated between the mid and late 1970s. In fact my mom once saw this picture and was really (REALLY) freaked out.

I never really had that "problem". I look at myself at the mirror and there is no big deal, but I was quite impressed that somebody out there actually had very similar facial features. However when I was a kid I used to ask myself "why" I looked the way I did. I obviously knew because of my mom (I look like mom's family) and some of dad, so I would spend quite some time analyzing pictures of both my old folks and trying to figure out why wouldn't they look different, what was it that made them look like that.

Lol, one time I kept looking at my dad and he asked me (very pissed) what the fuck I was looking at?

 

[Artifice Orisit]

Am I the only one who thinks Ted Bundy has (or is it had?) a great smile,
very honest, affably evil, somehow having just missed being disturbing.

 

[drumir93]

Ah man, I always confuse Ted Bundy with Al Bundy. Confused the crap out of me.

 

[dwags222]

its all about projection. if you don't like something about yourself that you notice in a picture, then just project yourself as how you really want to be. at first you'll have to do so with a real conscious effort, but after a while it just becomes habit. of course this only works for the things you can control, like good posture, looking people in the eyes, smiling more, or not caring if i'm just totally smiling at my own thoughts like an idiot, etc. or if you really care enough about how you look to diet and lift weights and stuff. or if you're really so ridiculously self conscious that you go get surgery.

i think most intp's just don't give enough of a shit about how they project themselves present the best side of themselves. i gave a shit for a long time, but now i like the way i look well enough that i don't really need to give a shit anymore, which was the goal all along i think (peace of mind).

 

[dwags222]

haha i think you can really get a good insight into how much people do or don't care about their own projection and what part of themselves they prefer to project. people who care about how they project themselves mentally will always use good grammar and spelling and what not, people who want to project their social selves will type just like they talk. people who are really vain i think just try to type in whichever way is "stylish." this is why you get teens who are typing in their retard type, i'm not even going to try to emulate it.

 

[sagewolf]

Tipe lyke dis? ...No, I don't even know what it is, I realise...

I never get that feeling when I look in a mirror, but I'm always surprised at how little emotion I tend to show: when I think I'm smiling in a friendly fashion, it's barely perceptible and it looks like I'm trying to smile despite having been recently orphaned, or as if I'm forcing it past my utter contempt for the recipient. I generally think I have a fairly neutral, amiable expression, but it's actually the dead "I'll kill you all someday" stare that showed up in my passport photo...

 

[Ulysses]

Tipe lyke dis? ...No, I don't even know what it is, I realise...

I never get that feeling when I look in a mirror, but I'm always surprised at how little emotion I tend to show: when I think I'm smiling in a friendly fashion, it's barely perceptible and it looks like I'm trying to smile despite having been recently orphaned, or as if I'm forcing it past my utter contempt for the recipient. I generally think I have a fairly neutral, amiable expression, but it's actually the dead "I'll kill you all someday" stare that showed up in my passport photo...

Same.

When my passport photo was being taken, I felt as if I was relaxed, composed, and well groomed. I also tried putting on a fake smile for the photographer. All in all, I was confident that it would turn out looking great.

The end result was very similar to a hostage photo taken by a kidnapper.

 

[Jennywocky]

Adding flash only worsens things.... (straight-ahead on-camera flash is perhaps the worst thing to ever happen to humanity).

Jesub... I HATE flash pictures! I mean, utterly hate them! And yeah, it is because I feel like they flatten my face out entirely, uggh.

As well as attempting to "pose" introverts. We will inevitable look like we're dead. For a natural looking portrait we need to be oblivious of the camera. Extraverts seem to be able to adopt more loose postures much easily... the bastards.

I went through a phase where I finally started taking self-portraits. It took me about a month of taking pictures daily before people stopped saying, "START SMILING, WILL YA???"

Honestly. I had to teach myself how to smile outwardly. I'm an introvert, everything gets internalized. I actually had to practice on how to extrovert my feelings adequately for the picture.

I personally hate other people taking photographs of me because of said reasons. But self portraits look good, and some photos from select individuals also turn out okay (because they actually know what they're doing).

Yup. I know what angles and distance and camera and lighting gives me the best appearance. I really have hated just about all but two pictures that someone else took of me... and those were merely passable.

Except for Melkor, he is hideous.

He shouldn't have worn those burning silmarils on his forehead.

Many people have told me I look like Ted Bundy. For those who do not know, Ted Bundy was a serial killer who operated between the mid and late 1970s. In fact my mom once saw this picture and was really (REALLY) freaked out.

AS long as you don't look like John Wayne Gacy or Albert Fish, I guess I can live with Bundy.

Am I the only one who thinks Ted Bundy has (or is it had?) a great smile, very honest, affably evil, somehow having just missed being disturbing.

That was the problem. He was actually a decent womanizer and sort of attractive, in a manic sort of way. He might have not been as destructive if he had been more palpably evil from the start.

Freaking ENTPs. I think his IQ was above 130 too.

 

[Agent Intellect]

i hardly ever look in the mirror and my profile picture is probably the only one thats been taken of me in the past eight or more years. i think i have a distorted self image, though. i used to be a lot heavier when i was younger, but i've lost a lot of weight, but i still think of myself as a fat person, even though people that have never seen me when i was heavier tell me they can't even picture me as being fat.

i definitely agree with the picture thing though, it has to be taken candidly, or i overthink how i should stand and what expression i should have on my face, and i'm no good at coordinating my body into something that doesn't look forced, awkward, and displeased with the situation.

 

[Toad]

Many people have told me I look like Ted Bundy. For those who do not know, Ted Bundy was a serial killer who operated between the mid and late 1970s. In fact my mom once saw this picture and was really (REALLY) freaked out.

I never really had that "problem". I look at myself at the mirror and there is no big deal, but I was quite impressed that somebody out there actually had very similar facial features. However when I was a kid I used to ask myself "why" I looked the way I did. I obviously knew because of my mom (I look like mom's family) and some of dad, so I would spend quite some time analyzing pictures of both my old folks and trying to figure out why wouldn't they look different, what was it that made them look like that.

Lol, one time I kept looking at my dad and he asked me (very pissed) what the fuck I was looking at?

Ted bundy is a good looking man..You lucky son of a bitch lol