Crying

[NO_ARM_NINJA]

I don't know if being open with your emotions is something INTPs don't do well in general or if it may just be introverts, or maybe its just me. I've noticed that most people, experiencing extreme grief, will often cry openly in public, with no regard for holding it back, like they want somebody to see them and help them, but when asked if they needed help they shoo away the questioner and seem enraged. I on the other hand will rarely cry in public, and if i do I hold it back as strongly as I can, although I don't know why. Most of any expression of grief is directed outward through pointing out the flaws in others and being an all round sarcastic dick, which seems different from most people. But if I actually must let tears escape my eyes I do so in solitude, usually at night, and it's rarely something i had pent up all day and was holding in, rather it's just being alone and having the time to think back, usually on unpleasant experiences, but even then I hold back so strongly that I notice myself clenching my jaw and tightening my fists until it hurts, like I don't want to express it even alone. I suppose everyone cries, its inevitable, but is everyone else so reluctant to do so? What are your guys' general experiences with it, opinions, thoughts, etc.?

 

[C.J_Finn]

If I end up like that I make sure that it's when I'm in total isolation. My reason is that I feel that whatever is causing me to feel like crying isn't anyone's burden but mine, so I won't do it around people.

 

[downsowf]

I generally am not prone to crying except if I hear about someone I know who died or got some terminal illness. If I do cry, it's not very intense and I'm not too embarrassed about it. You probably wouldn't even know I'm crying until you see me wipe a tear from my face. I could tear up like a baby watching a sad movie, though. "Old Yeller" is one of those tear jerkers that always get me.

 

[Beholder]

I'm just like that, but I think it's mainly because I would be extremely embarrassed if I were seen crying, also it's very easy for me to distance myself from my Fe. Before I discovered MBTI I called my Fe my "puppet", and I had him locked up in a cage quarantined from the rest of me and under careful observation, if that makes any sense to you.

 

[Zionoxis]

I honestly do not know the last time I have cried (excluding onions and tears from coughing or if it is cold outside). In all honesty, I would consider it a mortal sin to cry in front of others or even to cry at all, so I suppose I learn to get on without it. I will most likely cry from sadness eventually, but a pet dying has not done it for me yet.

 

[Peeps999]

I don't have a single friend who has seen my cry within the past 8 years(I occasionally cried from stupid things as a child). My emotions are no ones business except my closest friends and I abstain from crying in front of them because I feel like I'm being too emotionally revealing when I cry. It seems like the introverted part keeps me from crying in front of those I don't know and my angry "misunderstood" teenager side keeps me from showing it to anyone in my life. My family inevitably sees me cry about 3 times a year.

 

[Bronzere]

I am pretty much exactly like you guys, I don't let anyone see or know if I cry. Movies usually stir something inside me if there's a sad part, but I have yet to shed a tear while watching something. If I do cry, it will usually be when I'm awake in bed, because my mind takes some time to shut off, I give it free reign to roam, and it would often arrive on a thought that pains me. Then my head will ache quite badly if its a particularly sad thought, though tears may not come, as if I am squeezing them out with great effort. I may not even want to cry, but thats how it is. Also, if the grief is particularly intense and someone is within the No-cry-zone, I, rather ironically will laugh uncontrolably at something they say that isn't in the least a tad funny. I asked my GP about it and she said it was perfectly fine. One of natures many mysteries.

 

[A22]

I get emotional when I'm drunk.

 

[Oedipus]

I cried publicly when visiting Auschwitz, and spent the rest of the day in ultimate humiliation because of it. Other than that I keep it behind closed doors, though I don't cry often.

 

[Mello]

It happens too frequently.

 

[perkins]

Crying... meh, maybe tomorrow.

 

[hitode-kun]

Crying should never happen. Or at least no one should know of it.

 

[ElvenVeil]

"But if I actually must let tears escape my eyes I do so in solitude, usually at night, and it's rarely something i had pent up all day and was holding in, rather it's just being alone and having the time to think back" This seems very familiar.

Too me, crying is also something personal; something that I would prefer not to show people.
But I won't say that it is that rare that I cry (as in tears show).. That is because that there are some things in art, music and films, that can really tricker it. The small beautiful things really get to me and that I seem to have no control over.


I have also seen "clenching my jaw and tightening my fists until it hurts" in myself, but that is some years ago. Trained myself to search and face the roots of the anger or whatever, that is getting to me. In other words: trained to analytically stringent deal with emotional problems