Confrontation - IXFP

[Grayman]

How do the Fi types handle confrontation compared to the Ti types?

 

[QuickTwist]

My guess - by being passive aggressive and defensive. Ti types try to logic it out.

 

[The Gopher]

List the types of confrontation you want to know about.

 

[PmjPmj]

Unlikely to be direct unless they're *really* pissed off. Advice: tell them it's totally cool to talk about stuff and that you won't be mad or take it personally etc. Create a safe space (not the SJW libtard kind) for them to open up. Hear them out.

Then, eviscerate >:3

 

[Jennywocky]

Some Fi's are pretty militant. Why do you think INFPglobal and other sites didn't last? Unconstructive conflict. SoS, different site.

... point being, we're still trafficking in cliches here to some degree. Some Fi folks are really aggressive and some are really non-confrontational. It might be slightly different with the Ti crowd (probably "less" personal if you have to compare) but according to theory one is simply running off impersonal truth and the other is running off personal truth. Otherwise INxP can be pretty similar.

There's also different reasons (other than type) -- including life experiences -- that can drive a person to be more confrontational or less.

 

[Grayman]

Is there generally a difference in being invigorated by confrontation vs being worn out by confrontation in various types?

 

[Ex-User (13503)]

How do the Fi types handle confrontation compared to the Ti types?

INFPs: They don't. They pretend it doesn't exist, and they do this until it either goes away or causes them to snap.

ISFPs: They become impersonal, irritable, and crippled by self-criticism, which often creates a positive feedback loop with external critics.

Compared to the Ti-doms?

INTPs: Extremely delayed assessment. Realize there was a conflict about 20x slower than whoever else is involved in the conflict, and then assess and react.

ISTPs: Immediate assessment, frequently too soon. React by either self-adjustment or vigilantism, immediate or delayed depending on circumstances.

Generally, FPs have difficulties addressing issues, and TPs have no issue addressing them, but have issues identifying and validating them.

 

[PmjPmj]

Some Fi's are pretty militant. Why do you think INFPglobal and other sites didn't last? Unconstructive conflict. SoS, different site.

... point being, we're still trafficking in cliches here to some degree. Some Fi folks are really aggressive and some are really non-confrontational. It might be slightly different with the Ti crowd (probably "less" personal if you have to compare) but according to theory one is simply running off impersonal truth and the other is running off personal truth. Otherwise INxP can be pretty similar.

There's also different reasons (other than type) -- including life experiences -- that can drive a person to be more confrontational or less.

You're being far too reasonable, Jenny.

(she's entirely correct, but shhhh)

 

[Artsu Tharaz]

Feeling types are prone towards seeking harmony, and are hence less likely to be confrontational, however are entirely apt to voicing concerns assertively where they believe they are in the right - often in the sense of lessening conflict overall, so that they join the battle in order to stop the battle, as it were. A distaste for conflict, and hence a lower likelihood of being confrontational, is as I understand it, hallmark of the feeling types.

 

[The Gopher]

There is a scale of how bad the conflict is. Combine that with a scale of conflict management techniques that you run through and that's how Fi works. (starting with do nothing and ending with murder everyone) Generally it takes a lot before the oblivious types notice these things happening so only blow up and make a fuss gets their attention which causes them to think that blowing up is the first reaction to everything. Compare this to an ISTP who's style is do nothing and seethe until they blow up over the most recent conflict.

 

[Sinny91]

Well, I know one ISFP who avoids conflict like the plague, and another who'd just get up and knock everybody the fuck out. (That would be the ennea 8)

I have no experience dealing with INFPs as far as confrontation goes.

 

[PmjPmj]

A distaste for conflict, and hence a lower likelihood of being confrontational, is as I understand it, hallmark of the feeling types.

Similar could be said of some INTJs I know (myself included). In short, I greatly dislike expending energy via unnecessary social interaction. Therefore, I can and do let quite a few things slide - most often if the person I take umbrage with isn't really worth a shit to me.

It's a great deal more about conservation of energy than it is about avoiding conflict; I have a very limited amount of shits to give for the external world and the people within it, so I tend to spend it wisely.

I'm also a type 5 though, so I'm really stingy with my time and energy.

>_>

 

[Artsu Tharaz]

Similar could be said of some INTJs I know (myself included). In short, I greatly dislike expending energy via unnecessary social interaction. Therefore, I can and do let quite a few things slide - most often if the person I take umbrage with isn't really worth a shit to me.

It's a great deal more about conservation of energy than it is about avoiding conflict; I have a very limited amount of shits to give for the external world and the people within it, so I tend to spend it wisely.

I'm also a type 5 though, so I'm really stingy with my time and energy.

>_>

Hmm, yeah the introversion factor would also then be a factor in reducing the likelihood of confrontational behaviour. I suppose feelers would be more active in promoting harmonising behaviours, as opposed to simply avoiding conflicts.

 

[PmjPmj]

Yeah, spot on there. I've also seen a lot of (usually effective) attempts at mediation coming from Ts. The flavour differs, though. In my experience, Fs tend to approach it more softly-softly, highlighting how wonderful everyone is and how lovely it'd be if everyone could stop being so mean / nasty and get back to being happy and shiny.

In general, Ts will simply call out the shitty behaviour and explain why everyone is a cunt. Sometimes in a diplomatic way (INTPs) and sometimes in an extremely blunt way (INTJs). I have found this approach to actually be far more effective for diffusing situations though, weirdly. I think there's a lot to be said for being direct. It seems to 'shock' people somehow - at the very least they tend to cease their wanky behaviour to reflect for a while. Or continue hurting internally - but who cares about that?

D:

Meh, rambling.

 

[Artsu Tharaz]

Yeah, spot on there. I've also seen a lot of (usually effective) attempts at mediation coming from Ts. The flavour differs, though. In my experience, Fs tend to approach it more softly-softly, highlighting how wonderful everyone is and how lovely it'd be if everyone could stop being so mean / nasty and get back to being happy and shiny.

In general, Ts will simply call out the shitty behaviour and explain why everyone is a cunt. Sometimes in a diplomatic way (INTPs) and sometimes in an extremely blunt way (INTJs). I have found this approach to actually be far more effective for diffusing situations though, weirdly. I think there's a lot to be said for being direct. It seems to 'shock' people somehow - at the very least they tend to cease their wanky behaviour to reflect for a while. Or continue hurting internally - but who cares about that?

D:

Meh, rambling.

I do it in the N way - "gotta see it from other perspectives!!1"

I do it more in an F way though if there's an argument, especially if I'm drunk. Lol.

 

[Ex-User (13503)]

There is a scale of how bad the conflict is. Combine that with a scale of conflict management techniques that you run through and that's how Fi works. (starting with do nothing and ending with murder everyone) Generally it takes a lot before the oblivious types notice these things happening so only blow up and make a fuss gets their attention which causes them to think that blowing up is the first reaction to everything. Compare this to an ISTP who's style is do nothing and seethe until they blow up over the most recent conflict.

I like this. I basically added in an individual's ability to cope as another axis. Moderate stress causes people with weak coping skills to react in extremes while people with strong coping skills aren't phased at all.

Looking at our different descriptions of the ISTP... High stress and/or poor coping tends to bring some AsPD traits to the surface, low stress/high coping and they just rarely get into conflict to begin with. I'm guessing that gradient goes: Exact swift revenge -> Delayed revenge is safer and more effective -> Some effort to restructure thought patterns to focus elsewhere, maybe some shift in value structure -> Full, legitimate, and inclusive productivity that in itself solves and prevents conflict by building a foundation. Eastwood didn't just shoot up folks in Gran Torino, he left the car to Toad, yaknow?