Children of divorce?

[Kala]

Are/were any of you children of divorced or divorcing parents? If so, how did it affect you, and do you think that being an INTP had anything to do with how it affected you?

I'm writing a "cultural identity essay" for my English class; I have to pick a "culture" (INTP) that I am a part of, and a "pivotal moment" (my parents' divorce) in my life, and describe how being a member of my culture affected me during the pivotal moment, and how other members of my culture have been affected by similar pivotal moments.

Any insight/anecdotes/anything would be much appreciated =)

**Also, I'm not just talking about people whose parents divorced when they were kids; I'm including people whose parents are divorced in general, whether it happened when you were five or 25.

 

[JarNew]

my divorced parents are the reason i break into houses and steal woman's socks

only to wear them hidden beneath my jeans

 

[Kala]

Thanks! I'm going to quote that in my essay, probably more than once =)

 

[Bird]

My parents got divorced, remarried, are seeking
divorce again. Lul wat.

 

[MoonPhantom]

My parents divorced when I was 7, but now that I think of it - it`s for the better. Well obviously, because my dad used violence against my mom.
But living in a family, in which you see one person carrying such a huge responsability (me and my sister) was influencing. My mom earned money by working in two and at one time - at three work places, cared for us and even helped our relatives very much. That made me independant when I was still at the very young age.
But of course, I did not have a strong male figure that I could align. This is why I will probably never understand certain actions of my kind. Though I did develope a considerable respect for women kind and unconsciously hold them superior to men.
So yes, divorce messes up personality a bit.

 

[Kala]

That's interesting; our mom's are kind of similar.
My dad's a mechanic and my mom's a nurse. Dad was into drugs (namely weed and coke), and my mom always did her best to hide it from us. She worked 3 jobs, and he refused to even consider getting a second job. He cheated on her once, but she stayed with him mostly I think so that we could have a dad. I don't know if she did it on purpose, but she waited until my older brother (21) and I (19) were "grown up" (although my little brother is 10) to get the divorce. I swear, I never suspected that my dad was into that stuff or that they had such problems in their marriage, she was so good at covering stuff up.

 

[final-dimension]

....

 

[Solitaire U.]

My father was apparently an exceptionally handsome Encyclopedia Britannica salesman who got more than he bargained for when he knocked on my mother's door. Unfortunately, there was never a need for a divorce since they were never technically married. Sorry, wish I could have been more helpful.

 

[kinetickyle]

My parents got divorced when I was about three, so I don't really remember them being married. I was immediately shipped off to my grandparents' until the dust settled. Two years later, my mom married my step dad, and I moved in with them. It was kind of tense growing up in that house. There wasn't any violence or anything, but just an unrelenting tension. I spent the weekends with my dad, so I was at least able to get away for a couple of days.

I think that upbringing probably had more to do with my being an INTP than anything. I'm not a nature vs. nurture type - I believe both have influences on how a person turns out, but I believe the tension in my home led me to withdraw into my mind. I would usually come home from school, and lock myself in my room. I wasn't some moody emo kid or anything. I would play with toys and video games, and read comics or books. Or maybe I handled it the way I did because I'm an INTP. The whole thing has a chicken-or-egg sort of vibe to it.

 

[Lobstrich]

My mother and father were never really together. I was a one-night stand.
My mother then continued to get serious boyfriends and then they would break up again after a couple of years. She then married a heroin addict. That didn't work out. She's now married to another man. I'm fine, she keeps saying sorry for making me go through all this, I hate it. She has a right to do what she wants. I'm fine.

Kids that whine because their parents are divorced needs to wake up.

 

[Solitaire U.]

I wish my father was a heroic addict...

 

[EyeSeeCold]

I wish my father was a heroic addict...

Hahaha

 

[The Gopher]

I wish my father was a heroic addict...

Bahahaha.

 

[Lobstrich]

I wish my father was a heroic addict...

Lol, typo fixed! =p

 

[descendant]

my parents almost got divorced
my father had an affair and my mother caught him
so my mother came to me to seek for comfort and keep asking me to do something about it
but I don't really seem to care
I actually hoped that they would just leave me alone and stop bothering me with their problems
I don't know how they solved their problem but they seem happy together now

now that I think about it, seems like I was a very bad daughter.. isn't it??

 

[Devious]

My parents got divorced when I was 6/7, which is about 10 years ago from now. The divorce itself didn't affect me as much as the causes behind it. I think all I wanted was closure and the reasons behind it. The circumstances were complicated so my parents tried to hide the reasons. They underestimated me though. As a 7 year old I already understood the majority of what was going on, what I wanted was to understand why my parents (mainly my father) would do such a thing. I wanted to see through their point of view and understand why they'd go against their "love". But the more I understood the more cynical I became. My views of the world and human nature became darker and I eventually fell into a sort of depression. I'm not sure why I went through this stage.... I actually don't remember much after their divorce. In a way I don't want to know.
A few years later though I understood that it was all for the best and that it would've eventually happened. I still think it's for the best. I'd be peeved if they ever got together again. My parents are almost exact opposites. I actually like living my teenage life with divorced parents, there are always advantages..
But overall it didn't affect me that much. I think.

 

[Awaken]

My parents divorced when I was about 5. Right around the time when my mom began school for her Phd. As you can imagine, I was left to my own devices most of the day. My mom did not really believe in tv or toys, so I was left with going outside and actually exploring the world. A concept kids these days know nothing about. I am absolutely sure this had a great influence on the person I am today.

 

[Stoic Beverage]

My parents divorced when I was around 6. To be honest, I didn't particularly care. I still see my father now and again.
The only negative effect on me was lack of time around my dad. I imagine if he was around more I'd be somewhat more sagely.