Biggest Source of Frustration as an INTP

[snowqueen]

Okay I have formulated some thoughts on this finally.

I think it would be a genuine comfort for someone to simply sample that inkiness and not retreat in horror or revulsion. I don't expect that the person agree or accept what they see, only that they still accept me in spite tasting the edge of that maelstrom.

I missed this thread first time round. Felan - I identify with this 100%. You have expressed this so beautifully.

I was

just cosntantly punished for acting out and not being like other people's children; my mom especially. I really

hate girls who embody what she wants.

Yes - I suffered this from my mother. She actually has no idea who I am. My mother sees me as 'not-my image' in the sense that she has an image in her head of who I should be and I am defined in relation to how much I deviate from that (totally!). So I am a negative. She simply cannot see who I am and thus has never actually 'met' me. Given that I am now 52 and she is 82 that is an astounding feat of imagination on her part lol.

largely because it would give me the chance to be competent and relevant should such an upheaval occur, and also

because it would punish many of the untalented extroverts that take big, fat pieces of the proverbial pie.

sorry I deleted so much - this is a great post, but I couldn't quote it all! Yes I have felt like this frequently when I look at the world - I have to try and counter my bitterness and resentment because I know in the end it will only poison me. I have become more pragmatic as I've got older and understand the world is a very complex place and it isn't just frustrating for me, but for many other people. In the end I chose to work with the marginalised and the alienated because I thought at least I could help people feel less isolated. But then I had to put up with being an agent of the state - psychiatric systems are not there to give comfort to the emotionally distressed, it is there to keep them away from the rest of society so it can continue to promote the consumerist lie.

What I

really wish I had most at this point is just useful people; people in positions above me that I could talk to about

real concerns and problems;

You can pm me - if I can help, I will.

I feel pretty cheated growing up, because everything essential to myself and

staying afloat I had to discover and do myself

.

Yeah me too - and you're right, it does make one feel cheated especially when the media is constantly pouring out all those ideal family dramas. The only thing I would say is that the majority of people's families are pretty fucked up just that most of them are able to pretend better than we (INTP) are.

A year ago I tried the unraveled by a shrink route. I found a

host of people who are shit at what they do.

Don't get me started - I wrote a thread about this - 'the INTPs guide to therapy'

I was almost into the whole antidepressant/antispychotic drug circuit,

but then I just decided taht this too would be something that I had to overcome myself. I faked my way out of a

therapy program when I realized that my parents had essentially dumped me on strangers more incompetent than they

were.

Well done! That takes a lot of guts and actually shows a remarkable level of self-worth and self-respect. You KNOW you deserve better than that.

My frustrations would be:
Being unable to determine my desires in regards to career, lack of organization, and the sheer stupidity of it all. The whole "I wish other people weren't so stupid" thing. I would call it a superiority complex, except that I am really smarter than most people.

Welcome! I see this is your first post but you must have been hanging out for a little while?

 

[Mars]

Well done! That takes a lot of guts and actually shows a remarkable level of self-worth and self-respect. You KNOW you deserve better than that.

True that, you know you are on the truthful path when you realise that those around you are incapable of comprehending your path of thought.

I find it shatters my confidence, since there is nobody that I know of that would be capable of objectively critiquing me that I would consider competent.

Although my sister does come as close as anyone since she speaks from personal experience and does not attempt to direct me, only reminds me of lessons learned just before decisions are made.

I guess that is one of my frustrations, no-one to teach me things in a manner that I can relate with completely.. maybe not so much teach, at least observe events transpiring and learn from their experiences successes and failures in equal measure.

The proverbial glass wall, I can see life being lived in peoples choices but I cannot read the process in which it is achieved. Missing the magic ingredient I think.

*proceeds to bash head against mentioned glass wall*

 

[Black Pat]

I'm currently starting a program with the aim to help the more disenfranchised MBTI types develop their inferior cognitive functions and re-establish some hope and/or motivation for the future. I bounced around to basically every Introverted/Intuitive MBTI forum I could find and asked them the same question. I know for a fact that I'm starting with INTPs. Maybe it's because I'm an ENTP and therefore can relate, but the INTP forums broke my heart more than many of the other types when articulating pains and frustrations. More significantly, INTPs seem to appear over represented amongst the cross section of Most to Offer and Most Disenfranchised.

I doubt INTPs have any more frustration than anyone else. We are just able to write about it objectively and precisely. A frustrated INTP is still an INTP after all...

One major frustration is other peoples' constant need for validation through "small talk". Either the INTP indulges, or he is known as an arrogant, aloof, not-team-player. But drawing someone into a conversation that is more than gossip and all of the sudden...no takers...In other words, I engage and engage and engage in the he-said, she-said did-you-see-the-game-last-night so-and-so-is-getting-married s---, and then when it comes to giving me what I want out of conversation, I get nothing. Then I think, "I don't really want to waste my time with this garbage", and then I'm considered aloof and the cycle is complete. The truth is, I'm happy to be engaged and I'm happy to be left alone; what makes me unhappy is being engaged in "babblings" about, well, nothing.

 

[UniquelyCoordinated]

<snip>
Welcome! I see this is your first post but you must have been hanging out for a little while?

I've lurked for a little while. After laughing my guts out reading the "you know you're an INTP when...." thread in almost 1 sitting, I figured there were some like minded people around here.

 

[EditorOne]

"I'm just sick of trying to connect, of being understood, to become one with another. "

Me too, sort of, but not in a relationship context. I just get so tired sometimes of having to stop to explain things to people who don't "get it," whatever it is this time. Or maybe I'm tired of having to be polite about it. I know I generally seem fairly laid back or indifferent or whatever, and usually that's right, but jezu, sometimes I feel like the master of the obvious explaining how we're going to get something done or why we're doing something or what the connections are from A to F when I'm already at F. It's like world class exasperation. It's also a lot like pushing a rock up a hill.

Time for more vitamin B, I suspect.

 

[The Lurker]

Well:

1. Hating living in "an SJ world".
2. Procrastinating too much for my own good and not really willing or able to do much about it.
3. Not being able to socialize nearly as well as others, especially with romantic interests. (My super-social ENTP friend essentially told me to "grow a pair" when I told him I had trouble talking to girls).
4. Prone to being indecisive about important life choices (career, etc.).
5. Strong F types reacting so extremely to my unemotional, aloof tendencies.

Despite these things, I love being an INTP. I just wish I had a little more J in me, perhaps for a slightly improved sense of responsibility.

 

[Citizen X]

I lack organization and sometimes drive, I am very (VERY) hard on myself, even in things that logically were not going to be favorable for myself, where I had all odds against me.

I know I'm not stupid, I really know it (even if I constantly tell myself that I am) I was never a remarkable student, but all the genius people in school and college asked my opinion or even help in something they had doubts with, now these guys are out there having good careers and lives, banging super models or married with good, nice girls, while I'm still stuck here in a meager line of work, feeling alive only when I am training Krav Maga or doing intense physical activities like riding my bike until my legs feel like jell-o and then doing military style exercise until the point of exhaustion.

Not long ago I went through a very bitter breakup with a very nice girl that had been my partner for eight years, then the shit hit the fan and I fell into a horrid depression I am still walking away from.

I really am working on improving these aspects, trying to get some organization and drive, real drive, because dreams and illusions I have plenty. I want to be a writer and a successful architect, and I need both organization and drive for that.

 

[dwags222]

i also want to be a writer, well at least sometimes i do. i would love to write a novel, but that just seems like such an insanely huge comitment i can never get motivated to do it. and then i tell myself i should start with short stories, but i don't really want to write short stories so i'm definitely not motivated for that. and then i basically have to sit myself down and ask myself, how much do i really give a shit? aparently not much because i haven't started writing. and then knowing with utmost certainty that i'm not motivated enough to do anything about it makes me realized i suck, and it makes me wish i was a j. but i always despised the idea of being someone i didn't like, so maybe that will help motivate me to write?