As an INTP what do you think are some personal traits that a boyfriend/girlfriend can't have?

[Anaiyim]

For me I think that there are two things that annoy the hell out of me:

- Not being able to have a logical argument
- Not being able to engage in intellectual conversations

What about you?

 

[Jennywocky]

- humorless
- inflexible
- not curious
- irrational

 

[Yellow]

unstable, closed-minded, controlling, irrational, delusional, grandiose, shallow, stale.

 

[Anktark]

- humorless
- inflexible
- not curious
- irrational

These plus:

-arrogant about being close minded/ignorant

 

[8151147]

My ideal figure is opposite to OP's. I don't need my partner have logical or intellectual conversations. Just able to understand the conversation's contexts and every sides of life. Sound like an ESFP or ISFJ. INFJ is good too but they quite rare, I guess I will end up with an ESFP man or ISFJ woman.

 

[Knick]

Willful ignorance
Controlling behaviors
Egomania

In no real order. Anything else is decided on a case by case basis.

 

[Sinny91]

Just called it off with my ISTP date because he was humourless, not curious, and not assertive.
Split up with my ESFP ex because he was too heavy on the Fe, and not all that sharp.
Spilt up with my XNTJ ex before that because he relished in being a mind fuck -even more so than me.

They seem to be re-occuring themes for me.

 

[Ex-User (11125)]

arrogance
shallowness
lack of openness to new ideas or experiences...or maybe lack of intellectual curiosity in general

I guess I will end up with an ESFP man

this is probably true for me as well. esfps are the type i gravitate to the most irl for some reason...although i hardly find anything in common with them

 

[Seteleechete]

Insincere(most important)
Irrational
close-minded

 

[Spirit]

ISTP not assertive?

That ISTP wasn't interested in you.

 

[Yellow]

ISTP not assertive?

That ISTP wasn't interested in you.

Also, not curious? ISTPs are plenty curious about tangible things. That's close enough for the first few months.

 

[Inquisitor]

If she's not broadening my horizons in some way, what's the point? Most S types would likely fall under this category.

 

[Sinny91]

Dunno, he's a bit of a depressive ISTP. Said he's got depression but don't know why.
He's a typical ISTP in many ways.. He made me a present, an LED night light display. He loves electronics. He's also the perfect gentleman. Smokes weed so that's a winner. As I say, just a lack of humour and curiosity, if it's not electronic, or depressing, it must stay in his head.

In contrast, I keep my depression to myself, and share the quirky stuff, seems to be the opposite for him.

And erm, I meant, (in my head), sexually assertive.
Now it's out there..
He's happy for me to assert, but I'd like him to be assertive too.
He's well rounded, I don't get it.. *shrugs*.

We only parted yesterday, he's expecting to see me again, I haven't voiced my concerns to him yet. I'm just wondering if I can get more than depression and electronics outta him.. Intellectually and emotionally.
I don't need another person to fix... Everybody seems so broken these days.

 

[Sinny91]

If she's not broadening my horizons in some way, what's the point? Most S types would likely fall under this category.

But that's how I think as an N lol.

 

[RaBind]

Uncommunicative. They need to be able and willing to work on the relationship and their own behaviors as much as I am. Plus the silent treatment annoys me like crazy, my ESTP brother does it to me cause he figures that words without actions are meaningless, typical, but it bugs the shit out of me because it means that I can never get to understand what the hell was even happening, just there left wondering.

Be unable to, and usually that comes down to being unwilling to, avoid all kinds of misunderstandings. Tied to being unforgiving and having a bone to pick with me all the time.

Not be boring intellectually. I guess even if they this have this trait a mild attraction could form, but I don't think I could find it worthwhile enough to invest a lot of effort here. The attraction would die a slower death, then in the scenarios mentioned above, where it would be more of an execution.

Be unable to take a joke. Tied to unwilling to avoid misunderstandings.

Irrational depending on the circumstance. I think appearance of irrationality would diminish as communication increases in frequency and effectiveness, but if after we both clearly understand each others positions and it still seems to me that she's still holding clearly irrational views or is unwilling to acknowledge differing views, then that will bug me a lot.

 

[Doktorin Zylinder]

- humorless
- inflexible
- not curious
- irrational

Plus:
-unstable
-malicious
-arrogant
-close-minded
-socially inept (I already have that and we don't need two)
-immature
-uncommunicative
-petty
-approval issues
-an excessive amount of insecurity

 

[StevenM]

Almost the same as what was already stated.

Though I wonder if it would change easily depending on chemistry. 'Chemistry' being the right circumstances, and certain peculiarities of the person.

I guess my friend is irrational. As in, she makes very poor decisions (not just me that finds this, but everyone she knows). She may not understand computers, she has very bad discalculia, and most logic escapes her. But still, she's one of few who sees me out of my shell, outgoing, talkative, and actually having a lot of fun. She has a certain charm, and she also likes talking in-depth about anything.

I could go on about other bad traits from other people I otherwise enjoyed, but I think I'll quit there. I suppose we aren't talking about friends, but actual mates, which would be somewhat different. I guess when choosing to spend most of your (life?)time with someone, it's time to be more choosy, and pragmatic.

****************
I've considered that a mate who continually hosted big crazy parties would be bad.
A person I've grown too dependent on.
Someone who feels they have to change me.

Plus yellow's list minus one:

unstable, closed-minded, controlling, irrational(in certain circumstances), delusional, grandiose, shallow, stale.

 

[DrGregoryHouse]

small talker/ chit chatterer
loud
overly social
doesn't listen and have to repeat
too traditional/ follows too many of society's rules for the sake of following
illogical/ irrational/ overly emotional too often
dumb

 

[Perfectly Normal Beast]

an inability to evolve is for me perhaps the most vexing undesirable trait because it is not (usually) immediately apparent and can take quite a long time to become exposed

 

[DrGregoryHouse]

an inability to evolve is for me perhaps the most vexing undesirable trait because it is not (usually) immediately apparent and can take quite a long time to become exposed

agreed

 

[Brontosaurie]

ambition, lack of self-insight, over-confidence, non-cuteness

 

[Ex-User (9086)]

lack of assertiveness (being easily swayed/puppeteered with), narcissism, avolition